Posted
by
Bob Mackey
Note to readers: WTFriday is a weekly feature where I find something stupid about video games and get you to laugh until it goes away. Please try to forget this is what I normally do every day of the week.
God bless YouTube; if it didn't exist, we'd have to rely on mere text and still images whenever we wanted to feel deep shame over the past. And since we're on the topic of shame, there's perhaps no better place to look than the early-90s promotional video, a popular product in the field of regret. Today's example, a Street Fighter II promo produced by Capcom USA, is a delightful mix of racism, baditude, and inexplicable motivations. For what better way is there to understand Street Fighter than to let the characters explain it to you themselves (Note: rhetorical question)?
Because I have more of a job to do than just link to videos and wait for the mad paychecks to start rolling in, I'll offer up some commentary on each character featured above.
Ryu - As indicated by the title of this post, it's very strange that the voice actor chose a single word on which to stress the whole Japanese L/R thing. Ryu is the rear champion. Bereave it.
E. Honda - "Hey, guy who did Ryu; if you let me kick you in the throat, we'll let you do the sumo guy, too."
"Deal."
Blanca - Ladies and Gentlemen, Keith David.
Guile - "We're not here to defend, we're here to win." Guile obviously moonlights as a junior high flag football coach.
Ken - Is a party dude.
Chun-Li - Is not nearly Chinese enough for my tastes.
Zangief - I'm honestly surprised that they didn't go for a Yakov Smirnoff style "bear wrestles YOU" joke setup here. He was still a hot topic at the time, instead of only being relevant to the city of Branson.
Dhalsim - Okay, I'm pretty sure that this is just someone doing an impression of Apu and slowing it down with the powers of the Tiger TalkBoy.
Balrog - Could this be the inspiration for Cleveland of Family Guy?
Vega - Has some 'splainin to do.
Sagat - Once again, the Ryu voice actor returns, showing his unlimited range.
M. Bison - Is Cobra Commander is disguise???
If you'll excuse me, I have to go figure out a way to have shredding guitar solos play whenever I open my mouth. It's going to involve a lot of electricity. With me luck.
Related Links:
WTFriday: The Adventures of Sonichu
WTFriday: Are You Bad Enough to Save Pamela Anderson from Colonel Sanders?
WTFriday: 20/20 from 20 Years Ago Copes With Nintendo
About Bob Mackey
For a brief period of time I was Bull from TV's
Night Court, but some of you may know me from the humor column I wrote for Youngstown State University's
The Jambar, Kent State University's
The Stater, and Youngstown's alternative newspaper, The Walruss. I'm perhaps most well-known for my bi-weekly pieces on
Something Awful. I've also blogged for
Valley24.com and have written articles for EGM,
1UP,
GameSpite and
Cracked. For all of my writing over the years, I have made a total of twenty American dollars. It's also said that I draw cartoons, which people have described with words such as "legible." I kidnapped the Lindbergh Baby and am looking to do so again in the future.
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