The recent news about Earthbound never coming to the Virtual Console because of legal reasons has struck up a chorus of “But--” and “How come--”. People are understandably upset that Ness's adventure is going to remain in eBay Hell forever, and they want solid answers about why this wretched thing is happening.
There still aren't any solid answers, but the good man in charge of Mother 3's recent fan translation, Tomato, has put together an incredibly in-depth list of reasons why Nintendo is erring on the side of caution. Put in simplest terms, the Internet has made it easier than ever to conjure reasons for an IP lawsuit, and Nintendo already has numerous lawsuits hanging off it at any one time like parasitic fish on the belly of a whale. Even a company like Capcom likely doesn't see half the number of lawsuits Nintendo does, thus explaining why it shrugged off the release of Mega Man and Mega Man 2 on the Virtual Console, despite numerous musical “tributes” in both games.
As Tomato put it:
To avoid crap lawsuits, Nintendo has a team of legal people who have to go through everything Nintendo plans to release and look for anything that can cause potential lawsuits. Then these things are fixed if necessary.
The point is: they’re trying to avoid lawsuits in the first place. It doesn’t matter if they could clearly successfully win lawsuits brought against them; they’d still lose money in the process. Having this team of legal people is cheaper than putting up with every lawsuit that every crazy money-hungry company hits them with.
Remember Star Tropics, an 8-bit RPG by Nintendo? When we were kids, Mike pelted his enemies with a Yo-Yo. On the Virtual Console, his Yo-Yo became a “Star” because some Canadian company owns the rights to the Yo-Yo name. Likely said Canadians are too busy drinking and racing moose to care about an old Nintendo game, but Nintendo figures, why take the risk?
“So why is this all a problem now?” asks the Internet collective. “Why wasn't it a problem when Earthbound first came out for the SNES?”
There were copyright problems, and as Tomato notes, they were addressed. The awesomely-named “Grateful Dead Valley” became “Peaceful Rest Valley.” The Red Cross that marked in-game hospitals was removed, because sure enough the Red Cross will pitch a fit over logo copyrights otherwise. Dr Andonuts' “Sky Walker” craft became the “Sky Runner,” and the logo on the vaguely Coke-ish looking trucks was changed to something generic.
(The “Coke” logo was better off altered, anyway: the trucks in Mother 2 feature a suggestive white line under the word “Come.”)
So is this the very end, my friends? Is a VC release for Earthbound utterly hopeless? Tomato paints a pretty convincing argument, but like the UFO people often say, I want to believe. It's a funny old world out there, and it's full of just as many happy surprises as it is soul-crushing disappointments. Maybe all the lawyers in the world will simultaneously learn how to love again and Earthbound will show them the way.
Related Links:
Abandon All Hope: No Earthbound for the Virtual Console
Whatcha Listening To: The Earthbound Soundtrack
Earthbound and Back Again
