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A Demi in search of her Ashton.
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  • Facepalm: Games Radar - Paragons of Journalistic Integrity

     

    I had originally intended to make "Facepalm" a weekly feature, but the industry has been extra heinous lately, and well...you'll see.

    Games Radar is responsible for many of the most egregious examples of Diggbait, and this one surely hits the bottom of the barrel. Titled, "Video Games' Most Important Farty Butts", the article showcases flatulance from Boogerman, Beavis and Butthead, Wario and more. I think what most bothers me about this article are the words, "most important", as if any farty butt was worth memorializing.

    Read More...


    Posted Oct 02 2008, 12:00 PM by Cole Stryker with | with 4 comment(s)
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  • IGN Pwned by Random Dude on a Forum

     

    Linking to some guy's rant on a forum doesn't exactly fall under journalistic best practices, but Select Button's Broco had me rolling in the aisles with this scathing indictment of IGN's journalistic integrity. Basically, he picked a random review (Rock Band 2) and blotted out all the meaningless cliches and empty verbiage. It's twenty-two paragraphs of tripe, and well, it speaks for itself. Here are the opening two paragraphs:

    Harmonix launched music games into a whole new arena with the release of Rock Band last year. No longer did music games have to be about just playing the drums or the guitar or singing. All three elements were merged together into a cohesive and thoroughly enjoyable package. But while Rock Band was a breath of fresh air, it did have some issues. With the release of Rock Band 2 less than a year after the original, Harmonix addresses many of the past concerns and adds an awesome new online mode, certain to keep gamers rockin' for another year.

    The biggest addition isn't a new feature or function, but 84 new songs. All master tracks, these 84 songs represent the single greatest collection of songs in a game to date. Headlining the new tracks is the first Guns N' Roses single in more than a decade, "Shackler's Revenge." Along with these are a slew of incredible songs that span the '60s right up to today. AC/DC, Metallica, The Talking Heads, Pearl Jam, Journey, Megadeath, Modest Mouse, Rage Against the Machine, Bon Jovi, Jane's Addiction -- I could keep going, but you get the point. There are some brilliant songs here. And while there are going to be a few tracks each person will not care for, there's far more good here than bad.

    Read More...


    Posted Sep 16 2008, 12:00 PM by Cole Stryker with | with 1 comment(s)
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  • Kotaku Endorses Products Unaware

    Yesterday Kotaku published a post regarding how Figure Prints, a company that creates 3D models of WoW avatars, ran an ad in a comic book with a testimonial from Axel at Kotaku. The compelling testimonial reads, "Wow... I NEED ONE!!!"

    Problem is, no one who writes for Kotaku goes by the name of Axel. It turns out that the company snagged the gushing prose of one of Kotaku's bleating commenters, attributing the quote to Kotaku.com, where it technically appeared. And the commenters are all slapping Axel on the back with hearty shouts of, "Kotaku commenters FTW!!"

    Read More...


    Posted Jun 04 2008, 02:00 PM by Cole Stryker with | with no comments
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    • about the blogger

    John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

    Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Nerve, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

    Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

    Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia's prized possession is a certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

    Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

    Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

    Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.


    CONTRIBUTORS

    Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

    Send tips to 61fps@nerve.com