61 Frames Per Second : n64

Game Endings Out Of Left Field: Pilotwings

Nadia Oxford — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 03:01:00 GMT

Today on the Gamespite forum, there was a lull in between the ritual sacrifice and the summoning of the Dark One, so the members got to talking about game endings. Specifically, the game endings that “Made you go 'bwuh?'”

Endings that make you go “bwuh?” are not really the same as endings that make you go “Hey..HEY!” or goad you into a homicidal rampage. These are the endings that gently mystify you, perhaps in a manner that stays with you for a long, long time.

I shifted through my inner catalogue, flipping through the game-related memories I've stored in lieu of remembering how to do long division. I quickly found a game ending that made me scratch my head the first time I saw it: the finale for the pioneer SNES flight simulator, Pilotwings.

Earning the right to view the Pilotwings ending is rough. It's not an easy game, and you have to finish it on regular and “Expert” before you learn of your true destiny.

That's right. You thought you signed up for some froo-froo flight school, but guess what? Your co-pilot is destiny.

It turns out this Nintendo flight academy is actually a front/recruitment centre for a military organisation. When you prove that you can fly a plane, open a parachute, and maneuver a jetpack without fricasseeing your own buttocks, your instructors ask you if you'll do them a favour and fly an Apache helicopter to rescue some agents from from bad people.

So you do. And you're recruited as thanks.

Pilotwings' ending isn't bad by any means. Heck, video games need more crazy story twists. I never loved Pilotwings 64 nearly as much as the original, and to this day I think it's because nobody in the game asked me to go kick some terrorist ass.

Related Links:

Surf the Globe with the Wii Balance Board
The End Has No End
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Question of the Day: Ogre Battle and How Much Tutorial is Too Much?

John Constantine — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 22:00:00 GMT

Ogre Battle: The March of the Black Queen hit Wii’s Virtual Console today. This is good for a variety of reasons. Quality Virtual Console releases are a rarity here in the far flung future of 2009. Ogre Battle is rare itself; its two English releases tend to fetch a pretty penny on Ebay. I’ve never played Yasumi Matsuno’s first foray into dense fantasy opera, so I’m looking forward to checking it out on the cheap.

My history with the Ogre series is confined to Ogre Battle 64. OB64 was one of the only N64 games I ever owned and I spent many, many hours playing it in the spring of 2001. I had almost no idea what I was doing. OB64 throws you into the deep end as soon you start, burying you under a mountain of circuitous cutscenes and leaving you to figure out its blend of TRPG and RTS play on your own. I was pretty proud of myself for getting thirty hours into OB64 without a guide. That is, until I read a FAQ and found out about the nearly endless number of stats you have to consider if you want to actually see the game’s ending. Nothing in the game tells you about party loyalty or how to measure a unit’s leadership potential. Nothing in the game even indicates that these are things you’re supposed to account for.

I love it when a game trusts me to learn how to play. I think that’s why people have responded so well to Retro Game Challenge. Even beyond its Famicom devotionals, the games trust you to learn their rules through play. Nothing is more frustrating than turning on a game and having to sit through an hour of tutorials, forcing you to plod through poorly acted scenes of someone telling you to press X to jump. By the same token, games like Ogre Battle are so complex that you need to have an in-game guide to teach you their rules by example. It’s very difficult to incorporate a successful guide. Make it all text, and you risk the player not retaining any of the information. Make it all cutscene or real-time lesson based, and you risk boring the hell out of your audience.

How much tutorial is too much? How much should a game teach you about the way it works while you play? Should games always leave the player to fend for themselves, foraging for success through trial and error? Let me know, dear reader.

Related links:

Populous: Text Based Tutorials Need to Die In A Fire
Games You Keep Coming Back To
Question of the Day: How Do You Make a Horror Game Horrifying?
Question of the Day: Yu-Gi-Oh! And Card-Based Videogames?
Question of the Day: Your Ideal Controller?
Question of the Day: Why Can’t I Emulate?

Underrated: Mischief Makers

Amber Ahlborn — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Long before Wario shook things up on the Wii, a very odd little game that focused on the grab and shake mechanic came out for the N64. One of the earlier titles displayed for the N64, Mischief Makers was developed by Treasure. For those of you not familiar with Treasure, they are very well known for their 2-D shooters and for taking weird concepts and turning them into equally weird games, and we love them for it.

Mischief Makers was a 2-D platformer staring Ultra-Intergalactic-Cybot G Marina Liteyears, the robotic maid of lecherous Professor Theo. While visiting planet Clancer, the old prof is abducted and it's up to Marina to save her inventor/employer. You can cut the goof ball melodrama with a knife.

The game play centered around Marina's ability to grab just about anything; from objects, to enemy projectiles, to animals, to innocent bystanders; shake them and throw them. Shaking things would often reward the player with gems or cause the object to take on a new characteristic, like causing a missile to increase in power. The levels made full use of this play mechanic by offering elaborate platform and puzzle challenges.

Stages like this one really test your ability to maneuver.

The numerous boss and mini-boss encounters were especially a blast, demanding sharp reflexes and imaginative tactics to take down the screwball cast of enemies.

Yes, Marina is indeed riding on a cat for this fight. A cat she defeated in a game of dodge ball on the previous level.

Unless you're the type of person who takes gaming way too seriously, there's no reason not to love Mischief Makers.

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Things I Didn't Know Existed: GoldenEye: Source

Bob Mackey — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 17:00:00 GMT

No matter how snobbish we may act about it today, if you had friends and access to video games in the late 90s, then it's likely you spent an inordinate amount of time playing GoldenEye for the N64. It's really nothing to be ashamed of; after all, until Halo came out, GoldenEye was basically the only FPS in town for consoles. Today, however, it's little more than a curious relic. Anyone going back to GoldenEye more than a decade after its release shouldn't be surprised by the slow, swimmy movement and awkward shooting mechanics of Jimmy Bond--remember, the N64 controller had no second analog stick. This means that returning to GoldenEye for an N64 nostalgia trip might not be the greatest of ideas--unless, of course, you seek out alternative methods for playing the game. And this is where GoldenEye: Source comes in.

In case you weren't aware (and I wasn't), GoldenEye: Source is a total conversion package for Valve's versatile Source engine that apes the classic N64 FPS with the benefit of modern graphical and control standards. And if having a free, playable version of GoldenEye available for your PC isn't enough to make you start polishing your golden gun (sorry), perhaps this trailer for the newest beta will stir up some Bond love deep within your loins (again, I am sorry).

Go here to check out GoldenEye: Source. And let's pray that lawyers don't have a problem with any of this.

Related Links:

Movie to Game to Movie: Goldeneye
The High Cost of Gaming: Free Radical, Creators of GoldenEye, Close Doors
The Strange Case of Hype

When Does a Console Pay For Itself?

Nadia Oxford — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 04:03:00 GMT

Mr Cole Stryker and I share similar opinions on Nintendo's Wii. I do not believe it's going to kill the industry, nor do I think Nintendo is going to recruit hardcore gamers through a Super Smash Bros Brawl tournament and grind them into sustenance for casuals.

But after listening to the complaints about how little the Wii has to offer, I've come to wonder how gamers gauge their satisfaction with a system. When do you lean back, pat your belly and declare that a game console has wholly proved its worth?

I don't play with my Wii all hours of the day (huh huh), but I'm honestly puzzled by people who say, “I'm a long-time Nintendo fan, but I sold my Wii because there's nothing on it.” I'm going to assume that a “Nintendo fan” fought to the point of collapse during the bitter droughts that struck the N64 and GameCube. I owned both systems, and both earned me gasps from peers. “Jesus Christ, why?” they would wail.

Franchises like Mario and Zelda are in fact why I bought the N64, the GameCube and the Wii. My Playstation saw a lot more action than my N64, but declaring a console a flop once the dust on its casing reaches a certain level is deceiving. When The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time was released, that dust layer was wiped off my N64 with one pass of a paper towel and I spent the next several weeks immersed in one of the best action titles to hit the industry. Repeat wipe-and-play for The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask, Super Mario 64, Paper Mario, Banjo-Kazooie, Wave Race 64, and Super Smash Bros.

I had a handful of quality exclusives that I thoroughly enjoyed, without even including Goldeneye, a title that made the N64 a must-own for thousands. The GameCube was another console that's considered woefully short on software, but again, it could be counted on for Zelda, Mario and Metroid. All I really need are a few high-caliber games before I feel happy with my system purchase, but I wonder if I'm just huddling on a sparsely-populated set of bleachers.

I loved Super Mario Galaxy. I enjoyed The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess because it improved on many of the things I loved about Ocarina of Time. I am happy for No More Heroes. I use Wii Fit almost daily. I am champing and stamping for the new Mario and Zelda titles we've been promised, to say nothing of Cave Story, Punch Out!! and Dragon Quest X.

I don't think the Wii has done a bad job entertaining me for the $250 I spent on it, but it's possible I ask too little of my consoles. Or maybe I've just seen what comes of passion and haste. The recent lean months have brought in a hardcore Wii-returning ritual that's intended to “stick it” to Nintendo for abandoning core gamers. I wonder how many sheepish faces I'm going to see buying back used Wiis in EB Games over the next year or two.

Related Links:

The Wii Is Not Killing Video Games
The Wii's Feats of Strength and its Disappointments
What Do You Want from "Wii HD?"

The Day Ocarina of Time Got Me Kicked Out of History Class

Nadia Oxford — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 01:00:00 GMT

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time hit ten years of age last month, and I am so proud of it. The day I got the game, I skipped half a day of school, brought it home and forgot school even existed until my mother made me go back there the next morning. Once in class, I couldn't stop talking about Link's first 3D adventure. I bounced off the walls so hard that the teacher sent me out.

Why this story is magical: I was eighteen at the time and attending grade 13, a "preparation" year for college. And I had been exiled to the hallway for disturbing the class like an eight-year-old with a pocket full of fart bombs.

Ocarina of Time hasn't aged well in ten years. If I encountered a hermit scratching moss from behind his ears and blinking at the sunglight for the first time in two decades, I'd direct him in his video game education thusly: skip Ocarina of Time and go straight for Twilight Princess or even Majora's Mask. Link's first N64 outing was lacking in swordplay, no thanks to a barren overworld bristling with a few fences and peahats, maybe a leever or two.

But if this hermit told me some manner of centipede god had told him to emerge into the world strictly to study game history, I'd tell him, "Oh shit dude, Ocarina of Time all the way." Ocarina of Time is a pioneer. Bare fields were a small tradeoff for playing the Zelda series' classic puzzles in 3D for the first time. Light a torch with a lantern? Yeah, if you're a sissy. Light a torch by shooting an arrow through a living flame and sparking the cold sconce on the other side of a pit? Awesome.

(In fact, Nintendo loved this puzzle so much that the same one has revisited the 3D Zelda games several thousand times!)

The presence of a story in Ocarina of Time also startled us nerds. Hyrule had always had a history, but Link was a flesh puppet with a sword and interesting taste in hats. Ocarina of Time gives him the spark of life: Link goes from being a robot boy who had materialised out of the air one day to a real boy who was left orphaned when his parents died in some war somewhere. It's an exciting revelation! Link took the necessary steps to file for his generic JRPG Hero pedigree!

Link also inspires a man who keeps ghosts in a jar to consider prostitution. I think someone on the Nintendo Censorship Assembly Line fell asleep or stumbled off to hang a rat at this point.

Incidentally, Link's bleak awakening to a busted-up Hyrule ruled by Ganon is done really well. The previously la-la Hyrule Castle Town becomes a dead zone, and in the distance a halo of fire circles Death Mountain's peak. You think, "Oh God! What happened? Did I do the right thing? I gotta keep playing. Quit biting my leg, dog, I'll feed you next week."

If all game developers master such a degree of suspense, no one will ever go to school again, ever. Then our brains will die and aliens will vacation on Earth to play soccer with our empty heads.

Related Links:

Faster, Link! Kill! Kill!
The Legend of Zelda Majora's Mask: Why I Let Termina Go Squish
Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Stupidity

WTFriday: The Star Fox 64 Promo Video

Bob Mackey — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Note to readers: WTFriday is a weekly feature where I find something stupid about video games and get you to laugh until it goes away. Please try to forget this is what I normally do every day of the week.

When you're advertising your game, you definitely want to buy some Internet ads. TV spots are a must if you've got a big budget. And if you really want to go all out, you should definitely create a narrative about two Brooklyn wiseguys/corporate representatives kidnapping a skydiver and a scientist. Makes sense, really. Also, don't forget to steal the eyeball-popping torture scene from Martin Scorsese's Casino!

This approach may seem insane, but back in 1997, the aforementioned madness is how Nintendo chose to promote one of the N64's best games, Star Fox 64. We've seen a few promo videos so far on WTFriday, but this may be the goofiest--even if its intentions are pure. I'm sure Nintendo would like to bury this infomercial along with the very idea of the Virtual Boy, but YouTube is a source of inescapable shame. Just watch:

My favorite moment out of all this mess comes at 5:44, when the dollar store version of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" kicks in. Did a lawsuit from the estate of Kurt Cobain prevent Nintendo from making further--possibly copyright infringing--promotional videos? Of course not. Jon Lovitz needed something to do after The Critic. I like to think of a hung over, out of work Jay Sherman narrating that one.

Related Links:

WTFriday: Mega Man A Cappella
WTFriday: The Mario Paint Music Showcase
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Brave New Super Mario World

Nadia Oxford — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 22:20:00 GMT

A couple of days ago I posted my own ideas for "freshening up" the Zelda franchise. They were minor suggestions, at least compared to some other ideas I've seen 'round the fandom (how do you feel about Zelda steampunk?), but even minor suggestions are necessary. A collect-a-thon while you're wearing a wolf pelt is still a collect-a-thon.

Miyamoto knows he needs to give Zelda a bit of a spit-shine, and he said the same about Super Mario Galaxy. It's true that Twilight Princess was a bit close to Ocarina of Time in ways, but Super Mario Galaxy was, for me, a pretty unique experience--or if there's some game out there that lets you relive anything close to the space-faring adventures of The Little Prince, by all means please let me know.

That said, how do we get more "original" than forcing Mario to stomp Koopas while he's hanging upside-down?

By special request, I am going to stand up and yell my opinion once again. I personally would like to see the elimination of the "level hub". In Mario 64, you had to reach levels by jumping through paintings situated around Princess Peach's castle. At the time, it gave us a real sense of exploration and freedom. In Super Mario Sunshine, the sunny Delphino Square served as a level hub and it was less thrilling--especially since Mario was somehow travelling to other parts of the island by jumping through appointed walls instead of visiting new worlds within a world.

Super Mario Galaxy's space station hub didn't feel nearly as sloppy. It makes sense that we'd visit other planets from a space station, right? Even a space station made of gingersnaps and candy?

Alas, it was still a hub, thus pulling me out of the world I had chosen to explore and forcing my groove to change direction. That, and it was also kind disappointed that Mario accessed planets through Princess Rosalina's kitchen and bedroom, but we never got to see her bathroom. I'm not a pervert, I just wanted to see if her toilet was made of marshmallows.

It'd be interesting if Mario returned to a progression of levels within world maps, not unlike Super Mario Bros 3. Then again, Super Mario World used the same idea, as did New Super Mario Bros. We'd rejoice the return, then get tired of it within a couple of games.

Maybe Nintendo should switch its methods of world navigation. Gamers wouldn't notice the pattern: we have short attention spans. Bunny bunny bunny...

Related Links:

Miyamoto Says Something Was "Missing" From Twilight Princess. We Know It.
Not Quite 4D But Close: The History of 3D Gaming
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Movie to Game to Movie: Goldeneye

Bob Mackey — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Like everyone else who was alive in the late 90s, I played a hell of a lot of Goldeneye for the N64; as primitive as it may seem today, Rare's take on the Bond franchise was the first console shooter to make waves in a pre-Halo world. But despite the hours and hours I'd virtually murder my friends with the world's sexiest Englishman (not my definition), the source material never really interested me. At the time, I had never seen a James Bond movie, so I wasn't exactly worried if Goldeneye was a faithful movie-to-game translation. The N64 adaptation could have included a Kart racing level, and I wouldn't have known any better.

All these years later, it's safe to say that I have Rare's version of Jimmy Bond's adventure inscribed in my brain where so much useful knowledge could be, so I thought it would be a surreal experiment to finally sit down and watch the movie I had already had a great amount of exposure to, albeit in a different form.

It was weird.

Watching Goldeneye for the first time after playing the game so much is a lot like seeing Citizen Kane after you've already watched every scene in that movie parodied on The Simpsons (another surreal experience of mine). Seeing new representations of what were once fuzzy, low-poly environments felt like I just got cataracts removed. It's a shame that this novelty wasn't enough to keep me entertained for a solid two hours, because the movie itself is not so good-- aside from certain sexy Russian programmers.

It may be hard to believe, but with Goldeneye, Rare actually made a product that outdid the source material. And they were really creative when it came to extrapolating gameplay from minor scenes in the film; the entire first level of Goldeneye is based on what amounts to about a minute of the movie. Rare also produces a lot of content from things the movie doesn't show us, and things that could have happened within the narrative of the film. All of this amounts to a much stronger story in Goldeneye's video game adaptation; since we see and do everything from the perspective of Bond, it's much more interesting.

Looking back, it's funny to see what a surprise the N64 Goldeneye was at the time; we certainly weren't expecting much from a console FPS, let alone one based on a movie that was nearly two years old. But--as I've said--the video game version of Goldeneye manages to be much more entertaining than the movie on every level; even with the N64's lack of any real sound hardware, the game soundtrack is much better and much more memorable than the film's soundtrack, which is an awkward, synthy mess. The only good quality of the movie is that it reminded me of how much I loved the game--and that I actually wouldn't mind playing it again.

This can't end well

Related Links

The Strange Case of Hype
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What'd I Miss? Panzer Dragoon

Nadia Oxford — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 21:54:00 GMT

Despite appearances, the console wars today just aren't as fierce as the days when we knocked out each other's teeth arguing for the Super Nintendo against the Genesis. The transition to the 64/32-bit era was especially fierce, with Nintendo boasting about the benefits of cartridges over CDs (and convincing idiots like me) while Sega thought it had nothing to fear from a young stallion named the Sony Playstation.

In the end, I got a Nintendo 64. When I couldn't resist the pull of Mega Man anime cut scenes any longer, I got a Playstation. By that time, the Sega Saturn was grabbing its chest and gasping for air and we all looked up from our copies of Final Fantasy VII just long enough to laugh at its suffering. Being something of a Nintendo fangirl during the Hedgehog-Plumber wars, I thought, "Ha ha, Sega. I never needed your stinky games anyway."

Except for Panzer Dragoon. I needed that one very badly.

Ever since I was too young to be significant (what, like I am now?), I've been big on dragons. It pained me to pretend I didn't care about missing the opportunity to slice through the skies as a soldier mounted on the most awesome steed created by human imagination, but I think I did a good job even if it cost me a little piece of my soul.

I'm pretty well over my system bias. Nintendo, just give me my Mario and Zelda...and call me if you ever decide to stop being stupid about the Mother series. Microsoft, give me awesome downloadable games and I'll overlook the 13-year-old who named himself "jOO FuRn@ce." Sony, just give me your leftovers and try not to talk too much. Sega...give me some Panzer Dragoon. You are working on some new games and an adaptation of Panzer Dragoon Saga, right?

...

Oh God. There is no justice in this world.

I have, of course, played Panzer Dragoon Orta and I know I can find the Windows version of the original game easily enough. But in this age of drop-of-a-hat remakes, Panzer Dragoon is the series that deserves refinement and retooling with the love given to Bionic Commando Rearmed and Final Fantasy IV DS. Unfortunately, the original team members scattered to the four winds and have taken their dragons with them.

Panzer Dragoon is one of a handful of series that you can truly say was unique. Its rugged world was instantly distinguishable from tens of thousands of post-apocalyptic worlds ruled by evil Empires. And there's never any mistaking Panzer Dragoon's Miyazaki-inspired dragon designs for another rip-off of Anne McCaffrey's flying pony brigade, AKA the Mary Sues of Pern. The bond between the dragon and its rider isn't overstated or mucked up with a lot of softcore erotica.

Hardcore Gaming 101 has a very excellent write-up about the entire Panzer Dragoon series, including two spin-offs I never knew existed: a Game Gear abomination and an anime adaptation that had the potential to be excellent, but instead was stunk up by the presence of a whiny hero and a blind girlfriend who can (of course) sense the feelings of monsters, including "RRRR" and "I HUNGER."

Drag on, dragons. Wherever you are.

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I Wish I Had Bought Tetrisphere.

Amber Ahlborn — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Tetris, who isn't familiar with Tetris? I owned the original Game Boy once upon a time so naturally I had the game that started the craze. But I have a secret to share. I wasn't really a fan. It was okay, but I seemed utterly immune to its spell. Really, I'm not much of a puzzle game fan. Oh sure, I like puzzles that are worked into other games, like platforming games or adventures and such, but pure puzzle games have never attracted me that much.

But I really do wish I'd bought Tetrisphere.

I rented Tetrisphere numerous times for my N64 but I never bought it. I thought about buying it, but never got around to actually buying it. When enough time passed that the game had become all but impossible to find, I regretted not buying it. While the original Tetris didn't do much for me, and I can say the same of all the puzzlers inspired by Tetris, Tetrisphere was different. It mesmerized me. It even had a really good techo/trance soundtrack. Now, many years later, the game still pops into my mind and I hold out hope that it will hit the Wii's Virtual Console.

I still wonder why I never purchased this game when I'd had the chance.

Related Links:

It's My Tetris Party and I Can Waggle If I Want To

Mega Man 9 Goes Back to Your Roots. Way Back.

Watcha Playing: Cleaning House, Finding Roots

Wow, Superman 64 Really Was Terrible

Nadia Oxford — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 23:33:00 GMT

The Angry Videogame Nerd isn't beloved by everyone, but I find comfort in his disjointed rantings. It's definitely a hit-or-miss affair, but when he latches onto a game that's actually worthy of his unbridled rage, fun for everyone ensues.

Somewhere in the back of the Bible, God warns us against mixing the Angry Videogame Nerd with Superman 64 for fear of igniting an early Apocalypse. We did not heed His warning and instead encouraged the union. Thankfully, we all survived the result and we all had a good laugh about our near-deaths.

I found the Nerd's rant particularly educational. We've gotten used to seeing Superman 64 near the top of every "Worst Games Evar" list, often second only to the Atari 2600's E.T.--the title that touched the game industry's with a glowing finger that killed rather than healed. But I never realised how ghastly Titus' disaster actually is. Superman 64's very existence offends me. It does not have the right to be matter. Why should it exist when worms and bugs die every day?

Sorry for the dramatic streak, I'm just having a bit of fun.

I often review games and manga in exchange for bags of weevil-ridden flour and vials of heroin--er, I mean, vials of not-heroin. Maybe I'm soft-hearted, but I rarely dole out failing grades. There are many, many mediocre pieces of work out there, but (in my opinion) few failures. In my book, you get a grade for having the determination and stones to put pen to paper and keep on going until you have a finished product.

There is not one speck of effort in Superman 64. It completely earns its failure. It revels in it like a little boy who picks his nose to gross out his elders. I guess it's possible at least one developer missed his kid's birthday because of deadlines, but I'd be surprised. Look up the game's intro on YouTube, where Lex "throws" some of Superman's loser friends into some virtual reality world...by standing completely still. His victims stand even more still. Hell, Lois Lame poses for the event like it's a glamour shot.

There's something to be said about Superman 64, though: it will always live on as one of history's worst examples of a video game. That's arguably preferable to sinking down into Mediocrity Mire* and never being heard of again.

(*Misery Mire's slightly more tolerable twin bog.)

Related Links:

Periphery: Angry Video Game Nerd Edition
Common: Rare Makes Bad Games

Periphery: Archaic N64 Paraphernalia is The Best

John Constantine — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Periphery spotlights gaming peripherals and products from the past, present, and immediate future.

Gamesniped.com is one of the more dangerous blogs on the internet for gamers. Their contributors tend to find auctions and sales of gaming’s rarest detritus and, for the right person, just the sight of some of these treasures can cause madness. One of today’s oddities is an eBay auction for a Nintendo 64 Disk Drive development kit, complete with blank disks. For anyone unfamiliar, the 64DD is Nintendo’s biggest failure, eclipsing even the oft-derided Virtual Boy, considering even fewer games were produced for it. The bulky add-on was planned as a way to release add-ons for N64 games, as well as a tool for programmable software. Only nine titles were ever released, four of which are all-but-unknown sequels to Mario Paint.

For any basement programmers out there who want to show off their obscurity chops, better get in on the bidding floor now.