I had a little insight into what it is like to sit across the table from a date machine blogger this week. I've often wondered if Date Machine has a detrimental effect on my dating life and, since meeting up with Ambo and Zeit on Tuesday, I am now convinced of it.

Too much information.
Way too much information.

For example, both gentlemen are attractive and, at face value, dateable. So, had it been an actual date with either one I would have known vaguely what they looked like from their photographs and a little bit about their likes and dislikes from their profile and email. If there had been an email rally, I'd have a sense of at least the potential for conversation. And that would be sufficient. The date would have commenced, chemistry (or lack thereof) would have been established and a second date arranged, or not.

Instead, I know that Zeit likes: big tits, anal sex, coming in someones open mouth, being deliberately argumentative, farting, extreme bowel movements, body hair except on legs, being miserable and not going out very often. He dislikes humans.

Ambo likes flamboyant language, considering the minutiae of other people's sex lives including his parents, examining wrinkles and liver spots, staring at himself naked several times a day, video games. He dislikes many of his dates, physically at least, and is in love with someone else.

My dates know up front - those that read the blog of course - that I like tall men, skinny or built men but not fat men (or even a little shabby), foreskins, people that amuse me. Men also know that I am not a big fan of America or those pesky Americans that live here. To name but a few.

All of the above has been delivered in forthright and finite terms, as if any kind of deviation from the preferences as stated would be a deal breaker.

In fact, I've managed to (albeit begrudgingly) deal with a foreskinless penis, have dated some real shorties, even gone as far as to have two children with an American. (I will not compromise on the penis size issue however. If it is less than 6" and more than 8" then the deal is irreparably broken) But my ability to make concessions on these and many other issues is not remotely clear if one "knows me" from reading my blog.

Even though the three of us, by many accounts, are much more appealing in person, this abundance of insider information makes us much less appealing as a dating prospect. Especially as some of it, presumably, is written in jest or simply to be controversial.

In short, airheadgenius the blogger is shooting airheadgenius the dater in the foot.

Time for a new profile...

Here are some I made earlier:
ahg, zeit, ambo threesome plus booty calls
Is this thing on? Does anyone find love on Nerve?
Do you attract douchebags?
Jaded or pragmatic?
Let down badly by an Englishman
Dating and dying
Do your friends hook you up?
Is size everything?
King dong and kizz volume
Prostitues - yay or nay?
The female orgasm

Ok, so the last guy did not have a knob and thus threw everything into confusion. This guy appears to have a reasonably large willie, however he also needs to scratch even on camera which can only mean he's got crabs plus he's stoopid enough to put two watches on. Ah well, it's an imperfect world.