My friend C has taken to teasing me with the idea that I look like Nick Nolte. Just hearing his name insinuates a black metallic fear in the bottom of my heart. We have similar facial structures, no cheekbones, pursed lips, brows prone to furrowing. I'd be okay with the analogy if Nick Nolte's index of attractiveness stopped in the late Seventies, maybe somewhere around The Deep. That's not the image of Nick Nolte that I have. That may have been who he once was, but it isn't who he's become. The Nick Nolte I know is the one that looks like a scarecrow and passes out on the floor in airports, clutching his folded glasses like some confused professor after a quart of hot toddies. It's a scary comparison because it reminds me that I have no idea who it is that I'll become as the years continue to deflower me.
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