Two years ago we were fascinated by this story about London shopkeepers using "teenager repellent" to keep undesirable young people away from their stores. Today, England's Commissioner for Children launched a campaign to ban the shopkeepers from using the device anymore. Luckily, here in America the Free, we don't have a Commissioner for Children, so we can do whatever we want to the little shits, from sea to shining sea. And repel them we will: the device, called the Mosquito for the annoying ultra-sonic whine it emits (a high-frequency pitch audible only to people under twenty), is now sold in the U.S. by a distributor known as Kids Be Gone. For a reasonable price, you'll never have to tolerate the irritating free-spiritedness of youth again.
