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• From the Archives: Your Mother Was A Fish

  A word of warning: this Sunday, May 11, is Mother’s Day. Buy a Hallmark Card, dammit! Or, if you and your mother have a special sort of relationship, I guess you could share these stories with her… Read More... Posted May 09 2008, 01:14 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: lisa carver, personal essay, fiction, dating, from the archives, sex, The Modern Materialist, carissa neff, mother's day, A.m. homes, mermaids

• The Modern Materialist Interview: Geoff Haggerty and the Comfy Bed

  What do you think makes J.Lo go "woooo"? This week, The Modern Materialist talks to Geoff Haggerty, a writer for the Onion News Network, who, for a very long time, had a teeny tiny bed. And then he went shopping… MM: So, without necessarily getting too explicit, any interesting stories you can share about the bed? GH: Oh, you mean besides all the incredible sex I've had in it?  Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.  That's what it sounds like when I have sex. I'm sort of at a loss interesting story-wise. I will say that for the first month or so after I bought it, it completely felt like any extravagant purchase or gift. You know that feeling of, "I can't wait to play with my new video game or iPod or whatever?" Well I had that feeling, except with a bed. I got all happy and sleepy and tired at the same time and went to bed earlier than at any other time in my life. Want a bed that makes you go “Wooooo”? Find it right here, on the TMM. Posted May 08 2008, 01:30 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: interview, in other blogs, shopping, sex, The Modern Materialist, beds, the onion, geoff haggery

• The Modern Materialist Gets Its Freak On

  I don’t know about you, but I’m a bit addicted to the Modern Materialist blog. Maybe it’s because I happen to know two of the bloggers, and they’re super-fun peeps who most eagerly crash Playgirl parties with me. (Or force me to go hooping; sadly, not as dirty as it sounds). Plus, they find tons of amazing items that make me wish I was a trust-fund child, so I could fill my apartment with all the material goodness….But as of yesterday, they surprised me and got their freak on. And their freak was good… Read More... Posted Apr 15 2008, 11:41 AM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: gifts, The Modern Materialist, toys, sexy, post-op, clone-a-willy, Pac-Man, partyy favors

• The MM Interview: Mary Burke and the Mobile Internet

  Today The MM Interview features Zac Posen employee Mary Burke, and why she loves her Verizon Wireless USB720 Modem. Plan before you buy, kids! Check out Mary’s full review and life story here. Well, her life story as it pertains to this marvelous, modern gadget, plus what it’s like when the open road is your office, and a luxury women's wear designer is your boss. Posted Apr 08 2008, 03:33 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: interview, The Modern Materialist, buying, adoring, zan posen, mary burke, verizon

• New on Nerve, 4.4.08: The Modern Materialist Interview: Shayna Ferm and Her Amazing Sleep Machine

  Ooh, baby: today the Modern Materialist unveiled a new feature for all you Materialistas out there. Check out the Modern Materialist Interview, in which those wacky material girls and boys talk to people they like, about stuff they love. Today's inaugural issue features MM blogger Alex chatting with comedian and graphic designer Shayna Ferm about her Homedics® SoundSpa Sound Machine. She says she can no longer sleep without. I’m sure many of you would want to help her try, though…Check out the interview, and the pretty pics (both of Shayna, and the SoundSpa!) right here. Posted Apr 04 2008, 03:47 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: The Modern Materialist, shayna ferm, buying, homedics soundspa sound machine, sleeping, adoring

• In Other Blogs: The Modern Materialist Loves Calvin and Hobbes

  Bill Watterson was the Charles Schulz of the millennial generation. His richly drawn, tragicomic Calvin and Hobbes wedged pathos into the fantasy world of a spiky haired 6-year-old boy and his stuffed tiger. Today, The Modern Materialist writer Alex Zalben waxes nostalgic on comic strips past. “Comic strips, on a whole, are disappearing, and I think a large part of that has to do with the end of The Far Side, and Calvin & Hobbes, which were like a one-two punch for the strip format,” he writes. For only 95 bones on Amazon.com, you can pony up for a print of the heartbreakingly sweet final Calvin and Hobbes strip. Other goodies in The Modern Materialist grab bag: The vaguely misogynistic Hillary Clinton nutcracker. Kitschy throwback Zoltars from the Tom Hanks classic, Big. Clunky felt tip slingback wedges from Franco Sarto . And every nerd’s wet dream: a mailbox shaped like R2-D2. -- Joey Hood  Posted Mar 27 2008, 06:28 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: in other blogs, Joey Hood, The Modern Materialist, bill watterson, hillary clinton, calvin and hobbes, R2-D2

• Gimme!: The Double Pourer

  How did The Modern Materialist crew spend St. Patty’s Day? The perfect way: by finding green- and alcohol-related treasures. What do you think, kids: is the double wine pourer tacky? Or, if a date pulled this move, would you let him pull some other moves, as well? I’m kinda in love, in the same way I kinda love Three’s Company reruns…in theory. Not sure how it would play out in reality. I feel the same way about this “Mr. P Lamp”…Who would actually put this in their apartment? Read More... Posted Mar 18 2008, 12:20 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: alcohol, The Modern Materialist, green, P. Diddy, eco living, wine, environment

• Best Buy of the Day, 2.25.08

  Everyone wants an egg that looks like a bunny. Right? Right? If that’s not your cup of…breakfast…The Modern Materialist has plenty of other delicious ’n’ freaky objects for your affections. Such as: Tic Tac Toast; the Cableyoyo; top-of-the-line salt and pepper shakers; colorful cocktail monkeys (who won’t steal your drink!); Tetris ice trays; faux-microphone light fixtures (goes well with air guitar); and the anti-gravity treadmill. Don’t ask me what that entails…ask The Modern Materialist. Posted Feb 25 2008, 04:26 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: The Modern Materialist, tetris

• Put This in Your Mouth and Smoke It

  Fresh from The Modern Materialist, with a big helping of joy, wonder and WTF: “How to celebrate Castro’s retirement as El Presidente of Cuba? I’d say light up a fine Cuban Cigar, except, just because Castro isn’t ruler anymore, it don’t mean Cubans are any more legal. So let’s try the next best thing, and break out the Natural Wood Effect Electronic Cigars! The completely non-flaming device fits flavored nicotine cartridges into a wood casing, for that “I don’t know what a cigar is” effect we all crave. Flavors run the gamut from Apple, to Pineapple, and you can even get them in Menthol.” Check out the how-to video, here. Better than Nicorette? Posted Feb 20 2008, 11:49 AM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: The Modern Materialist, WTF, Castro, cigars

• Best (Twisted) Buy of the Day

  Sure, every day The Modern Materialist finds tons of cool/wacky/necessary items for your buying pleasure…but today, of all days, you might be in search of a last-minute gift for your sweetie. My pick o’ the day is Jason Sho Green’s twisted, hand-drawn greeting cards. (Because Hallmark, sadly, doesn’t make a card that reads, “You had me at anal beads.”) But Jason does…check out the arty brilliance, here. Also good for getting in the mood: the right lighting and the right, um, stripper-themed candy bowl? And for all you V-Day haters out there, try this… Posted Feb 14 2008, 12:36 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: The Modern Materialist, Jason Sho Green

• Get Your Shop On: The Modern Materialist

  Head on over to The Modern Materialist and get your daily, cool-new-product fix. My personal, eco-geek fave as of this moment: the Envirosax. Even though the name makes me think of drug commercials on TV (and their corresponding, mile-long list of side effects; compulsive gambling, anyone?), these are actually colorful, trendy reusable grocery bags. Their extra-groovy feature? They can be rolled up into little wads o’ love, so you can tote ’em around in your purse or pocket, and never be stuck without a reusable bag again. Plus: what old-school trend is popping up in all-new places? Wendy’s fantasy life, er…this cool coffee table. Perfect for Valentine’s Day: “May Contain Nuts” briefs. How to decorate your walls when you’re too lazy for manual labor. Love it or leave it?...the Mr. Suicide bathtub plug. And…the “great iPhone robbery!” Posted Feb 12 2008, 12:05 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: The Modern Materialist

• In Other Blogs: The Joy of Sex, and Spray-On Tans

  Even though Scanner Bryan managed to come back from Mardi Gras with an alarming lack of boob shots, Scanner managed to keep it real in the realms of anatomy and aesthetics: We’ve got an awkward phone encounter with some crazy mess who intentionally drank colloidal silver for ten years and turned blue [insert reference to frustrated testicles here]; complementary guys who spray-tan themselves orange, the gallery edition!; LED pasties; the Joy of Sex redux; Scanner Bryan learns about anatomy…down there; and another reason not to f*ck your cousin. The Screengrab has been abuzz with losses, lists, and conspiracies. Behold: bidding a fond farewell to Roy Schneider, star of Jaws; trying their damnedest not to forget about John Hughes; and entertaining a new and slightly terrifying theory (Diablo Cody: possibly not a real person? Discuss.). Also, Screengrab takes on the Kingdom of Belgium, as Take Five sets out to prove that “there's a lot more to Belgian filmmaking than just Jean-Claude Van Damme.” Point taken. Read More... Posted Feb 11 2008, 03:02 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: scanner, screengrab, nerve video blog, in other blogs, Caitlin M., The Modern Materialist

• Brand-Spankin’-New on Nerve, 2.11.08: The Modern Materialist Blog

  Sure, money can’t buy you happiness…but it can buy you lots of sweet-ass lifestyle accessories. Check out our brand-spankin’-new blog, The Modern Materialist, “your new guide to the best ingredients of the good life (the best material ingredients, anyway). Whether you're looking for hip gift ideas, suggestions for designing and furnishing your new home, or you just haven't a clue how to spend your paycheck, we'll have all kinds of tips to point you in the right direction. Covering the whimsical, practical, fashionable, and just really weird, The Modern Materialist will be jam-packed with great finds, regular  features, awesome deals, contests and more.” Contests? Whimsical, practical, and weird? Sign me up. Plus, little-known fact about blogger Steph Auteri: she owns a BeDazzler, and she’s not afraid to use it. Visit The Modern Materialist to find items that'll make you joyfully scream like the lil' kids, above. Posted Feb 11 2008, 12:43 PM by Nicole Ankowski with | with no comments Filed under: Steph Auteri, The Modern Materialist