I’ve
always been turned off by what I’ve come to term “Spice Girls Feminism,” which
came to be embodied and wrapped up in impossibly ridiculous, expensive couture
on Sex in the City. Maybe I’m just an
incredibly late bloomer with a bajillion hang-ups, but I think female sexuality
– specifically, what it means to be female, sexual, and open about it – is
infinitely more complicated than the binary tropes we’re handed. Either you’re
a swoony romantic or a power-seeking fatale. Right? Well.
In her personal essay I, Slut, Carrie Hill
Wilner explores the dynamics surrounding the “slut phase”: what it means, how
it’s been co-opted, and how to embrace f*cking without an agenda.
“It's incredible how, whenever you start sleeping
around, people — even other slutty people — try to explain you to yourself with
a vocabulary normally reserved for self-mutilators and alcoholics. Because,
apparently, when you're a girl, casual sex (as opposed, of course, to formal
sex) is caused by a) raw, man-eating, empowered lust; or b) confusion and
insecurity. Every time you fuck someone without being totally into it, it's
treated like a minor tragedy. According to golddiggers, therapists and screenwriters,
sex is all about power, and if you're not careful, it's so easy to slip, drop
that power and become a scared, drunk, dehumanized study in despair! Unless, of
course, you're experimenting, and if you're experimenting, your mistakes are
medals.”
Read more…
— Caitlin MacRae
