There are no vibrators, porn, or David Hasselhoff, but there's
something about this story we can't get over. Barry Colenso, British
chocolatier who once made an entire billboard out of chocolate, has
resigned from his position as master chocolatier at Thorton's after he
was caught by employees of a rival store in an "act of
truffle-squishing." This is not something that actually happens, this
is the climax of a movie starring Bill Murray about a chocolatier who
found his wife in bed with his best friend that morning, then lost a
huge client at work because he mistakenly insulted the man's wife, and
stepped in dog poop after being thrown out of his limousine. Can't you
just see the guy at the end of his rope, all rage and frustration,
reason and propriety out the window, just squishing and squishing this
asshole rival's truffles. It's Dan Ackroyd in Trading Places. Forgive
us for digressing into breaking chocolate news, we become giddy anytime
someone with the word "master" in their title has a public meltdown
