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"Men's Health" is All About Getting Dudes Laid, Safely

Posted by Emily Farris

Maybe this is news to no one but us, but we never bothered to look at Men's Health because we have a vagina. We thought it was all about teaching men to exercise, eat their greens, and check out another guy's dick in the shower without looking gay. But, no, it's like Maxim up in there.

There must be some coded language on the cover that keeps women from opening it in the doctor's office or maybe it's an ancient secret passed down from fathers to sons, but Men's Health is chock full of articles about "Sex & Relationships," including February's "Seduction", "Decode Her" and "The 10 Best Things to Tell a Naked Woman." But once you "get past the grind," Men's Health just wants you to be safe. For example, their "Test Your Condom I.Q." quiz. We scored "not bad but not great either" and only because we think condoms expire earlier than they really do and because we thought dudes were lazy, not stupid (see question number 7). And you can't blame us for being careful and forgiving, now can you? Luckily, we answered this question correctly:

5. The best way to put on a condom is?
_Place it on the head of the penis and unroll it all the way to the base
_Remove it from the package, unroll it and pull it over the penis
_Remove it from package, inflate it and pull over the penis like a sock
_Without even removing it from the packaging


[Men's Health: Test Your Condom I.Q.]


Comments

Nerve Insider said:

We know, you’re busy. You’ve got a to-do list more extensive than Bret Michaels’ bandana collection.

January 14, 2008 11:44 AM

Pages tagged "lazy" said:

Pingback from  Pages tagged "lazy"

January 14, 2008 11:55 AM

JCF said:

I don't read this magazine, but condom expiration dates vary depending on the kind of lubricant on it.  Some expire earlier than others.  As for question 5, it may depend on what you mean by "best"....

January 15, 2008 7:47 AM

Vagina Exercise said:

Pingback from  Vagina Exercise

January 15, 2008 8:24 PM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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  • about the blogger

    Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

    Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

    Colleen Kane has been an editor at BUST and Playgirl magazines and has written for the endangered species of dead-tree magazines like SPIN and Plenty, as well as Radar Online and other websites. She lives in exile in Baton Rouge with her fiance, two dogs, and her former cat. Read her personal blogs at ColleenKane.com.

    Send us links! scanner@nerve.com