Dr. Ruth is old, so old that she remembers a time when "a teenage girl would protect her virginity—so most sexual acts could be left off the table when it came to high school dating." And we're guessing that picture is about ten years old, making her, what, 113 by now? But that doesn't mean she's not with it. Her upcoming (and 32nd) book is titled "From Facebook to Friends with Benefits: Dr. Ruth's Guide to Parenting Teens Today." She probably started writing that before we even joined Facebook. And she's willing to explore the questions that have been confounding us for ten years.
"...today 'sex' includes oral sex and other acts, so the rug
has been pulled out from under the excuse of 'I want to remain a
virgin.' Yes, a teenage girl might not be pressured into having
intercourse, but that's definitely not the case when it comes to not
wanting to engage in oral sex."
Seriously, Dr. Ruth. Where we went to high school girls were giving out blow jobs like chewing gum and taking it up the butt, all the while claiming they were still virgins. So, were they or weren't they?
She doesn't answer our question, just yet, and instead moves onto more important topics.
"And here's another thing that has changed: Girls are often the ones putting the pressure on boys to perform sex acts. And since a young man is more likely to suffer from performance anxiety if he's under pressure, this insistence on sex is doubly powerful.
"Women are lucky in the sense that they can engage in sex without needing to be sexually excited, though having an early sex life which doesn't include any sexual satisfaction can lead to long-term problems for these young women. But a young man can have performance anxieties if he's feeling under the gun. I'm sure there were plenty of males who were once happy if they tried to reach under a girl's dress and had their hands pushed aside. He was fulfilling his role as aggressor, knowing that the young lady would fulfill hers as protector of her virginity. But today, not only won't she necessarily push his hand away, but if he doesn't make a move, she may well force the issue."
Yes, Dr. Ruth. We agree. But let's say we our friends engaged in oral sex way before they officially lost their virginity two weeks before their 18th birthdays. Were they still virgins or what??
[Forbes: New Teen Pressures on Sex]
