Woolworth's Kinda Regrets Naming Kid's Bed "Lolita"

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

I'm sorry, but this story just about writes itself: a bunch of nitwits who design beds for six-year-olds came up with the non-funniest sex joke for preteens since that giant boner on the cover of the Little Mermaid VHS. They claim ignorance of great Russian novels and Peter Sellers movies in the case of the bed, designed for Woolworth's, they named "Lolita."

According to Reuters: 

Woolworths said staff who administer the website selling the beds were not aware of the connection.

In "Lolita", a 1955 novel by Vladimir Nabokov, the narrator becomes sexually involved with his 12-year-old stepdaughter -- but Woolworths staff had not heard of the classic novel or two subsequent films based on it.

If they'd never heard of the book or the Kubrick movie (or, for that matter, the ultra-dirty Jeremy Irons-starred remake), then where the hell did they come up with Lolita: The Bed For Six Year Old Girls? Are girls in Britain being christened with that name, without apparent irony?  

For more head-scratching stupidity, click here. 

 


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Posted Feb 01 2008, 11:52 AM
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Comments

profrobert said:

Um, it's a novel by a naturalized American citizen, written in English while the author was living in the United States.  How does that make it a Russian novel?

February 1, 2008 12:08 PM

spasmak said:

Lolita isn't a Russian novel.  Vladimir Nabokov was an American and wrote in English.

February 1, 2008 12:09 PM

Brian Fairbanks said:

Oh my God, it's a joke, people.

February 1, 2008 12:28 PM

spasmak said:

because it's a joke you couldn't fact-check for 2 minutes?  you have a responsibility to the community. (<--joke)

February 1, 2008 2:18 PM

LydiaSarah said:

Just to add to the pedantry here...was Peter Sellers in that movie? I thought it was James Mason. Who did Peter Sellers play? I haven't seen it for a while. (And the Jeremy Irons one was better and, uh, more memorable.)

February 1, 2008 4:35 PM

Nerve Insider said:

Oh Lord, it’s gonna be a long February...Check out these WTF-worthy items of note. For instance, Scanner

February 1, 2008 5:57 PM

schmessica said:

Yes, Peter Sellers was in the movie.  He was Quilty, the writer who 'steals' Lolita from Humbert.  

February 2, 2008 9:29 PM

About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Nerve, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

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