Who Would You Rather, Boleyn Girls Edition: Scarlett Johansson or Natalie Portman?

Posted by Emily Farris

 

This is the moment of truth, ladies and gentlemen: boobs or brains?

Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman star alongside each other as sisters vying for the affections of King Henry VIII in "The Other Boleyn Girl." And we know one of the actresses is known for her boobs, among her many talents, and the other is known for her brains, among her many talents. So, which Boleyn Girl would you rather? Scarlett Johansson or Natalie Portman? 


Comments

jane said:

Johansson. Ever since Ghost World, and no matter how much she seemingly sells out.

February 26, 2008 1:00 PM

kowhaileaves said:

natalie for sure.that lady has everything!

February 26, 2008 2:03 PM

godwal said:

Natalie

February 26, 2008 2:15 PM

Mark said:

I'd say both (at the same time?) would be ideal but if forced to choose...Natalie. While less...physically endowed...she seems to be better mentally endows.

February 26, 2008 2:30 PM

Nik said:

Scarlett.  

February 26, 2008 2:35 PM

camilla said:

Oh, Natalie, without hesitation.

February 26, 2008 2:45 PM

braxtonblack said:

natalie because i can't stand the thought of having to lay beside scarlett afterward and hear her speak. natalie has brains and sex appeal, scarlett just has sex appeal.  

February 26, 2008 3:14 PM

rachel said:

natalie.

February 26, 2008 3:27 PM

Bryan Christian said:

in this movie, natalie -- i tend to find scarlett in costumey period pieces a little disconcerting -- but i think that scarlett's got the hotter ouevre overall. (i can't count "the professional" here, that makes me feel toooooo dirty.)

and hey -- are people here thinking scarlett's dumb or just not as smart as natalie? i'd say scarlett's just not an ivy leaguer, and remind everyone that portman dated moby for a while, so there.

February 26, 2008 5:13 PM

nate said:

Natalie is about a close to perfect as a celebrity can come.

February 26, 2008 5:37 PM

profrobert said:

Scarlett, hands down.  Natalie may be smart (and I dig brains), but she's so annoying in everything that she does.

February 26, 2008 6:04 PM

dippy_gumball said:

i'm a girl, can i play?

both.

February 26, 2008 6:05 PM

jane said:

"and hey -- are people here thinking scarlett's dumb or just not as smart as natalie? i'd say scarlett's just not an ivy leaguer, and remind everyone that portman dated moby for a while, so there."

Good point Bryan Christian. And who says that Natalie Portman is necessarily that smart? Universities are businesses. I feel like a lot of celebrities get accepted to ivy league schools for the publicity and the presumption that they're probably going to pay full tuition out of pocket. Kind of like rich kids getting in. Kind of like George Bush getting into Yale.

February 26, 2008 6:37 PM

littlebill1138 said:

unfair!

oh man.  oh man oh man oh mannn.  This is the hardest ever.  

Natalie.  I'm so sorry Scarlett.  :(

February 26, 2008 8:31 PM

Emily Farris said:

I never said that one was smarter than the other, I just said that one is known for her brains and the other is known for her boobs. Among both of their many other talents. So there.

February 26, 2008 9:07 PM

Khanone said:

Three way?

February 26, 2008 10:19 PM

hilraiel said:

Both played needy lovers (Natalie in Closer and Scarlett in that movie with Jonathon Rhys whatshisass) but Natalie made it sexy.  Natalie has brains but her real draw is her stare. Portman hands down.

February 27, 2008 12:55 AM

melsean said:

such a superficial question. who would I rather? ... Scarlett has so much more to offer in the sack, so much more of her in which to lose myself sensually. But maybe Natalie makes-up for it with imagination or other talents ...  How 'bout once each and then let me decide :-)

February 27, 2008 9:39 AM

aludarie said:

Hey, throw Natalie in that pink wig she was wearing in Closer, and I'd happily become a lesbian!

February 27, 2008 9:50 AM

Adale said:

Scarlett.  She may not be as smart as Natalie, but she's not nearly as annoying.  

February 27, 2008 1:25 PM

Brian Fairbanks said:

Forget Natalie's beauty and intelligence, it's about who do you want to fuck?!

I can't imagine anyone seeing both of them naked, side by side, and not jumping on Scarlett first.

February 27, 2008 1:43 PM

dgilman said:

I feel oddly cool towards both of them in general, although they each have their merits.  Acting talent is a wash, I think; Natalie strikes me as the superior actress, but somehow she keeps appearing in dumb movies compared to Scarlett's work.  This is totally arbitrary, but based on the photo above, the dumb/smart thing tilts heavily in Natalie's favor.  She may not be stacked like Scarlett, but she'll know waaay more interesting things to do than lie there and think of England.

Plus, Scarlett is doing this stupid Tom Waits cover project.  Good Waits covers are few and far between; recording an album of them is just asking for scorn.

Natalie for the win!

February 27, 2008 2:00 PM

spoongirl said:

wait. i'm confused. cuz just because scarlett started doing (admittedly vapid looking) louis vitton ads doesn't make her dumb. she's actually pretty damn smart, every bit as much as natalie. you don't get to be wood allen's musr if you're an idiot.

February 27, 2008 2:13 PM

sevoyeur said:

Definitely Natalie

February 27, 2008 2:39 PM

Mike said:

Yes.

February 27, 2008 4:28 PM

acdacd said:

Both.  In Canada.  In a car.

February 27, 2008 5:17 PM

Ulises said:

I don't understand why you people talk about natalie as she were the next nobel prize in literature... I would do her simply because I'm not into blondes nor into boobs. I like brunnettes and asses yet; I would look for a third choice soon.

February 27, 2008 5:33 PM

mustride said:

Scarlett.  I find Portman to irritating for words.

February 27, 2008 5:54 PM

birthfrmmetaphr said:

Scarlett.  

February 27, 2008 8:18 PM

blkbam said:

My ultimate fantasy is a threeway with Scarlett Johansson  and Kate Winslet.

February 28, 2008 11:02 PM

melsean said:

Oh, sure, really mess up the fantasy realm. Kate Winslet and Rachel Weisz!!!

February 29, 2008 8:42 PM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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