And we're not easily disturbed. But they get far worse than strap-on man boobs and the baby Jesus butt plug. 

We feel like the rubber fisting mitten and the dildo gas mask should come as a set. Sadly, they do not.

What, like you've never had foot sex?

We don't have a dick so we've never understood the fascination with just sticking it inside things. We know it feels good and all, but shouldn't there be some kind-of appeal to what you stick it in? And does sticking your dick inside a stand-alone, moustachioed rubber mouth have any appeal to anyone? Anyone? Is it like 70's gay porn theater sexy?  Why not just draw a moustache on your fist?

[Cracked: The 25 Most Disturbing Sex Toys]