Was Jesus a Child of Rape?

Posted by Emily Farris

A Dutch filmmaker thinks Jesus was a child of rape, and wants to make a movie about it.


"Basic Instinct" director Paul Verhoeven will publish a revisionist biography of Jesus in September, following more than 20 years of research.

The Dutch filmmaker, who has had a lifelong ambition to make a film about Jesus based on scientific research, claims that Jesus' father was probably a Roman soldier who raped Mary during the Jewish uprising in Galilee. He also claims that Christ was not betrayed by Judas Iscariot.


First of all, we will totally pay $10 to see that movie.  

Second, if it wasn't a soldier who raped Mary, even if the story happened like the Bible says, didn't God sort-of rape Mary in a way? It's not like she exactly consented. "Yes, God, you can totally bust your load in me and then not pay any child support."

Third, new t-shirt idea: "God is a Rapist." No? Too much? You think? Because if you'll buy it we'll go get the silk screening supplies. Right. Now. 

[Reuters: Dutch filmmaker claims Jesus a child of rape


Comments

profrobert said:

I can barely draw a stick figure, but if I could paint, I'd do a Rubensy-style one of the Annunciation as a violent rape.  God, laughing devilishly, would have a giant phallus tearing into a terrified, little, teen-aged Jewish girl, while off to the side, the Archangel Michael would be putting cuckhold's horns on a crying Joseph.

April 24, 2008 10:50 AM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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