Who Would You Rather: Jessica Simpson vs. Ashlee Simpson Wentz

Posted by Emily Farris

 

We know you're a little tired of hearing about Ashlee Simpson Wentz and her baby and her baby daddy. But you know who is probably more tired of it? Poor Jessica Simpson. But maybe, just maybe, if you'd rather do Jess, she'll feel a little better about being pushed out of the spotlight by her little sister. So, which Simpson would you rather? Jessica or Ashlee?  

 


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Posted May 30 2008, 10:59 AM
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Comments

profrobert said:

Jessica.  If Ashless will fake singing, who knows what else she'll fake.

May 30, 2008 11:32 AM

wundersmack said:

Neither.  They're both kinda gross.

May 30, 2008 11:42 AM

jwebster8 said:

by "Who would you rather?", I assume you mean "Who would you rather beat to death with a baseball bat?"

...crap, I still can't decide.

May 30, 2008 12:31 PM

RandyBoy said:

Seriously, this is just gross. Who wants to have sex with the, um, developmentally delayed? Ashlee used to be kind of cute before she had her face re-done, but now....well, beating anyone to death with a baseball bat is messy. Make it "Who would you rather push off a cliff?" and I'll go with "both".

May 30, 2008 2:04 PM

Maxwell Hammer said:

Jessica Simpson is a blonde bimbo, so she has that going for her. But Ashlee is fucking psycho, so of course the sex would be great.

So it's hard to say.  

I'd have to pick Jessica because she looks a little cleaner.

And I've never fucked a blonde. I mostly just do redheads and asians. So a change would be good.

May 30, 2008 9:38 PM

C. said:

Actually what I am tired of are tired terms like "baby daddy" and "snark."

June 1, 2008 8:00 PM

PO said:

riDICKulous question. You might as well ask would you rather Jessica Alba or Henry Kissinger. Jessica Simpson is a goddess. Ashley Simpson is a homely piece of shit. Duh. I might even choose Kissinger over Ashley, just for the Watergate stuff.

June 2, 2008 6:10 PM

A. said:

Are you people bonkers?  Ashlee is quite cute, Jessica looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger.  Easy decision.

June 2, 2008 8:46 PM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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