What's Worse Than Chicken Pox in Your Vagina?

Posted by Emily Farris

 

You think it couldn't get worse, right? Oh, but it can, because chicken pox are is only temporary. 

And other things are forever. Like Hell, if you believe in such places. And if you don't believe in Hell, there's always this: 

 

Rachael Ray on your back. Which leads us to the inevitable...

 

Previously:

Who Would You Rather: Nancy Grace vs. Rachael Ray?

Rachael Ray Sex Tape Best YouTube Parody In Ages

[Via Best Week Ever]

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Comments

Mel said:

Rachael.  Just because it is on my back so I wouldn't have to see it, though.  It's more a horror that you inflict on others than yourself.

June 4, 2008 9:48 AM

Emily Farris said:

You'd rather have Rachael Ray on your body forever than chicken pox in your vagina for only a week?

June 4, 2008 10:08 AM

puchinello said:

Emily--the premise is quite faulty here.  Because chicken pox at any time in your life may later lead to outbreaks of shingles on the original pox sites, and bc shingles is a relatively benign but rather painful Herpes zoster virus, and can recur forever, I don't think you want chicken-pox in your ya-ya.  No.  For the record, I have neither a ya-ya nor the shingles thingy, so I'm not an authority.  Just fyi.

But that tatoo is bloody ugly.  Who is Rachel Ray again?  A stripper or the designated Vestal celebuwhore of the moment?

June 4, 2008 11:07 AM

Emily Farris said:

I was brought up to believe that not having chicken pox as a kid could increase your chances of shingles as an adult. But apparently everything I learned as a kid was wrong, including the fact that Jesus saves.

June 4, 2008 11:22 AM

profrobert said:

Now, did you mean in the vagina or on the vulva.  I don't have either, but I suspect it might influence the answer of someone who does.

Also, in the spirit of over-disclosure, my parents told me that when I had chicken pox at the age of six months, I had a pox in my ass crack (not that they said "ass crack"; they said "bottom"), and that I was VERY unhappy about that.

June 4, 2008 12:28 PM

SlowNewsDay said:

Yep, your childhood teachings were off, at least about the pox. It's having had it that increases your chances of shingles. Oddly enough, there's a vaccine for shingles, but you have to be 60 and have had chicken pox before you're eligible to get it. (And I say oddly enough because it seems weird to me that you have to already be infected with the virus before they'll give you the vaccine for it.)

June 4, 2008 12:38 PM

Emily Farris said:

Oh Prof Robert. I meant way, way inside. Way inside.

June 4, 2008 12:40 PM

farknerve said:

In the interest of medical correctness (because I am obsessive like that), shingles IS chickenpox.  It's the virus reactivated, often because the person's immune system has become depressed.  

That said, chickenpox in the vadge doesn't mean that future outbreaks of shingles in the vadge.  Regardless of where the person's chickenpox were, shingles tends to be on the torso.

As a side note, the chickenpox vaccine wasn't introduced until 1995, so pretty much anyone who's old enough to be reading nerve has already been exposed to the virus and is at risk for future outbreaks of shingles.

In other words, there's no reason to concern ourselves with the possible future consequences of chickenpox.

But aside from all this....I'd even take the shingles over the tattoo.  Could you imagine the poor man who tries to do this girl from behind?  

June 4, 2008 3:07 PM

GeeBee said:

PLEASE people! Chickenpox is singular not plural! You're making me grind my teeths!

June 4, 2008 6:16 PM

Christian said:

Already had chickenpox in the vagina, it's actually not a horrible as you would think.

June 4, 2008 8:10 PM

farknerve said:

What's the plural?

June 4, 2008 9:38 PM

rolyler said:

Chickenpoxes

June 4, 2008 10:23 PM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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