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Moff Diving into the Diary of Grand Moff Tarkin

Posted by Steve McKay

 

George Lucus you have given us much…but George Lucus, you have taken much away…but I will say…or perhaps sing…this to you now George Lucus.  "No matter what you take from me you can’t take away this di-a-ry!!!!!"

Finally, a candid look inside the heart and mind of everyone’s favourite sour-pussed commander of the Death Star. In these never before seen passages addressed to his wife (Whaaa?  Really?), we get a chilling account of the events leading up to the death of this beloved Imperial senator.  Here is my favourite entry:

Lord Vader arrived today. I swear every time I see him he gets bigger. And you'll never guess who he had with him. Remember old Senator Bail Organa? Well, Vader had his daughter in tow. He picked her up along the way after attacking her Consular Ship. Attacking a Consular Ship? What balls. 


Comments

NonCharlotte said:

Umm....it's "Lucas". With an "a".

The diary was funny, though.

June 10, 2008 6:15 PM

danrimage said:

The guy who wrote that diary should have written the prequels.

AND Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull, come to think of it.

June 10, 2008 6:53 PM

borstalboy said:

Very, very funny.  Thanks for posting this.

June 11, 2008 10:24 AM

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  • about the blogger

    Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook will be published in fall 2008. Emily lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn with her cat, but just one . . . so far.

    Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

    Nicole Pasulka is a Brooklyn writer and editor who's always on the lookout for the dirty. Her other virtual home is at The Morning News, where things are squeaky clean most of the time.

    Send us links! scanner@nerve.com


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