Sometimes we forget how lucky we are to live a place where class doesn't have a whole helluva lot to do with what we accomplish in life and love. We've all seen that cute, smart guy marry the stupid white-trash girl and we've seen the smart, successful woman marry the unemployed stoner. As Sarah Palin has shown us, you can do anything as long as you want it bad enough; it's the beauty of America.
Unfortunately, in many cultures, marriages are still arranged or lovers are only allowed to marry within their social class. In South Korea, "weddings have become symbols of greed and waste, as families try to outdo each other with extravagant offerings. Houses have replaced housewares, while fur coats are now standard presents for new mothers-in-law."
It hasn't always been like that in South Korea, though.
From 1961-1979 under the rule of Park Chung Hee, strict rules were laid down about how weddings could be celebrated. "The 'family ritual code' limited the number of guests
at weddings, as well as the amount that could be spent. The law was
liberalized in 1985, a few years before the military regime gave way to
democracy, and that's when the spending spree started."
"It's become ridiculous," says Kyeyoung Park, an anthropology professor
at UCLA. "Now it's all about who is winning the game." The race to the
top has gripped South Korea's upwardly mobile and competitive society.
For much of Korean history, two traditional values—Confucian
moderation, and the need to gain face—balanced each other out, but
today, the latter has acquired the upper hand. "Traditionally you would
exchange gifts of clothes among the extended family," says Tony
Michell, a business consultant who has lived in Seoul for decades.
"These days, people are talking about apartments and cars."
So, if we move to South Korea and marry someone we don't love, do we get one of these? And a little dog, too?
That would be so sweet!
It'd be just our luck that we'd end up like Sun, from "LOST"—pre crash.
[Psychology Today: Global Psyche: The Dowry Dilemma]
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