"Dad, Guess Who Lost Their Virginity Last Night?"

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

 

This eighteen-year-old girl made the mistake we've all had nightmares about: IMing"Dad" when we meant to tell "Darcy..."

Elisabeth Frisinger was on a class trip with all her high school chums from Cleveland, Ohio when she decided to jump on IM. 

Lizzy: "OMG! Just had 1st time on beach! Gr8! Wish u were here!"

Jesus Christ, woman, you write texts worse than I IM and you're old enough to lose your virginity? No wonder Dad, whom you accidentally messaged instead of your friend Darcy, is pissed:

We would be convinced of this item's fakery if it weren't for the fact that her classmates took pictures of her misery (which we won't subject you to) and leaked the story in the first place, which Frisinger has yet to deny. And all she had to do was say, "Dad, I meant-- it was my first time checking out the beach on this trip." In this instance, her braindead use of English would've helped her.

Poor thing-- guess this is why you don't add your fuckin' parents to you buddy list-- use the telephone, that way you don't make mistakes like these! Duh.

 

Related:

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Comments

fuzzyoctopus said:

*snicker*

December 10, 2008 6:40 PM

gf said:

Oooh, bummer.  But for the record--that's an iPhone text message screen.  Her dad isn't on her buddy list, he's just in her cellphone.

December 10, 2008 6:59 PM

porkchips said:

i dont buy it, because first times are never "gr8"

December 10, 2008 11:20 PM

spacedout said:

Actually, I doubt she lost her virginity on the beach. Sounds like she was psyched about her first time having sex on the beach.

December 11, 2008 5:10 AM

Cannonball Run DMC said:

Fake. Viral ad for the iPhone.

December 11, 2008 9:36 AM

About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Nerve, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

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