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• Man Has Sex With A Soda Bottle... With Unpredictable Results

  Big thanks to Scanner Colleen, who found this godforsaken story in the Strait Times, of all sources. Its other top story last night is entitled "What do teens do online?" (First line: "IF TEENAGE girls are online, chances are they are chatting with someone.") Yesterday, we brought you another entry in our exclusive, frightening series "Things Not to Fuck," with entry #245: A Pine Cone. We decided this story was just too bizarre to be relegated to a filing system and so... without further ado... at your own risk, of course... Read More... Posted Apr 01 2009, 09:44 AM by Brian Fairbanks with | with no comments Filed under: elderly, wtf, scary, penis, singapore, penises, anal, today in wtf, hilarious, painful, old people sex, soda, senior citizens, exploding chair kills boy, jones

• Exploding Office Chair Kills Man, Um, Anally

  You do the math. Oh, right, this doesn't really make sense does it? Let us try to offer you a bit of an explanation. Read More... Posted Feb 20 2009, 03:25 PM by Emily Farris with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: dead people, news, death, China, weird shit, anal, anus, weird news, death by anus, anally, exploding chair kills boy, exploding office chair kills boy, anal death

• Man Commits Suicide by Stabbing Himself in the What?

  This may be the craziest way to die we've ever heard. Experts say it's very shocking when someone, as in the case of singer Elliot Smith, commits suicide by knife because of how painful and prolonged the plunge can be. (We promise the story we're about to tell is much more subdued than that graphic sentence.) That kind of self-inflicted stabbing has nothing on what one Chinese man did to himself... Read More... Posted Feb 17 2009, 09:44 AM by Brian Fairbanks with | with no comments Filed under: wtf, scary, China, england, medicine, hospital, families, news of the weird, anal, suicide, today in wtf, stabbed, english, anus, poison, chinese, suicidal, doctor, vicar, debt, absurdity, news bloopers

• Scanner Highs and Lows: We're This Close to Losing it to Sarah Palin

  In a month we'll either get to stop hearing about Sarah Palin forever or we'll be stuck hearing about her for four years. It kind-of feels like that time when you decide you're ready to lose your virginity and just need to find someone to lose it to. You know it's either going to be really great or really terrible, but you just need it to happen already... Right? Anyone? Read More... Posted Oct 03 2008, 05:29 PM by Emily Farris with | with no comments Filed under: michael cera, virginity, tv, highs and lows, hugh hefner, naked, anal, paul newman, rachael ray, anal sex, anne hathaway, sarah palin, joe "boobies" francis, microwave

• What's It Like Being The Husband Of A Porn Star?

  Who killed JFK? If God created the universe, who created God? Under which NFL stadium is Jimmy Hoffa buried? These and other eternal, forever unanswered questions are easily overshadowed by the most important one of all: what's it like being the glaring dude on the sidelines of your wife's porno movie? Read More... Posted Aug 14 2008, 11:53 AM by Brian Fairbanks with | with 4 comment(s) Filed under: marriage, open marriages, nsfw, porn stars, engaged, naked people, pornography, anal, naked women, naked photos

• Spencer Pratt Knows a Thing or Seven About Initiating Anal Sex

  Hey, yo, you know who we really want to imagine doing the stinky samba? Spencer Pratt, of course. In honor of Pratt being such a desireable anal sex partner, let's look at what he told Radar Magazine and the world about how to initiate back door loving with the object of your affection. Spence, when's a good time to ask for anal?   Read More... Posted May 08 2008, 04:23 PM by Nicole Pasulka with | with 2 comment(s) Filed under: spencer pratt, radar online, anal, radar magazine, anal sex

• Can I Wear The Obama Mask Now?

  Apparently, our Google Alert for Barack Obama doesn't cover the Houston-area "Men Seeking Men" section of Craigslist. Read More... Posted Feb 26 2008, 01:45 PM by Brian Fairbanks with | with no comments Filed under: google, hotel rooms, Barack Obama, sex, fleshbot, gay couples, gay sex, masks, anal, hilton, Muslim