I consider myself a novelty thief (a salt shaker here, a candle from the Heath Ledger bar there) but I have to give a guy some novelty credit for stealing a buttload of underwear from a Victoria's Secret in Dallas. And ever since my own unfortunate incident in a Victoria's Secret fitting room, I can't help but smirk a little at this.
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Okay, we actually didn't send that check, but if we did, and you never got it, it could be because more than 100,000 pieces of undelivered mail were found in the home of a Postal Service employee.
Hey dumbass, those rhinoceros horns you stole from the museum so you could grind them up and use them as an aphrodisiac? Yeah, well, they've been soaked in arsenic and DDT so if you could bring them back, that'd be great.
