Scanner : 69

Happy Belated Birthday to Porn Star Ginger Lynn

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 22:29:00 GMT

You may not believe this absolutely true story about having 69 on our 18th birthday with porn star Ginger Lynn, but we'll tell it to you anyway...

Ginger Lynn, who turned 46 on Sunday, performed at a strip club in Connecticut on my 18th birthday and brought meup onstage to perform fifty pushups from the 69 position, with my face planted securely in her crotch. The entire audience counted each pushup out loud, just to make sure I knew they were there, leering. Then she gave me her wet T-shirt, which I subsequently lost.

As Ginger tells us to this day, "I'm so glad I can say I took your virginity on your eighteen birthday." Little does she know...

Happy birthday, Miss Lynn... keep on truckin', much as you did in this classic Metallica video:

Related:

Having Painful Sex? The Men of New Jersey Would Like To Help

Memo to the Telegraph: If You Cover Up, You're Not Naked

(Bonkers) Woman Ejected From Giants Game For Big Boobs

Top 5 Susan Sarandon Sex Scenes

Sloppy Seconds: The 69-Year-Old Pinup Dude

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 23:36:00 GMT

The adults at one Georgia Middle School have found a way around the no-sex-on-the-job rule: just set up an inflatable mattress in an unused room.

Bush used to be a drunk, as we all know, but now he isn't afraid to talk about it. This guy has nothing left to lose-- he's more dangerous than ever.

The stars are coming out for Obama's inaugural...

Anne Hathaway, Susan Sarandon, Marcia Cross, Tim Robbins, Seal, Adrian Grenier, Ashley Judd, Jane Krakowski, Rachael Leigh Cook, Blair Underwood and directors Spike Lee and Ron Howard are confirmed. And that's just a partial list of the hosts for an unofficial inaugural ball.

Elvis Costello is the headliner and rock stars Sting and Sam Moore will also appear, according to The Creative Coalition. The ball is a fundraising event for the nonprofit arts and entertainment advocacy group.

The event will kick off in Washington's Harman Center of the Arts the night of Jan. 20, when Obama is sworn is as the nation's 44th president. Musical guests are scheduled to perform until midnight.

As if you needed a reason to stop buying a shitty magazine like Us Weekly.

If there really is such a thing as the "liberal media," why is this story about the Head of Homeland Security hiring illegal immigrants only on Daily Kos?

Is the Governor of Ilinois innocent? Of course not, but he may not be found guilty either, if you listen to these kooky law professors.

92% of women masturbate. Yep, this is a very big news day.

Amy Adams, if you didn't enjoy your first marriage proposal, we'll gladly show you how its done.

And is this guy real or Photoshopped to death? He looks like a bad Jenny Craig ad personified. Metro UK seems to think he's the real deal: a 69-year-old buff mofo.

Related:

Weatherman Wants To Get "69 Sex?"

Emily Farris — Tue, 06 May 2008 14:37:00 GMT

This Twin Cities weatherman is super excited about the Vikings' number 69, Jared Allen. He's so excited, in fact, that he thinks someone is "gonna get 69 sex."

[via Plog]

Scanner : 69

Happy Belated Birthday to Porn Star Ginger Lynn

Having Painful Sex? The Men of New Jersey Would Like To Help

Memo to the Telegraph: If You Cover Up, You're Not Naked

(Bonkers) Woman Ejected From Giants Game For Big Boobs

Top 5 Susan Sarandon Sex Scenes

Sloppy Seconds: The 69-Year-Old Pinup Dude

Sloppy Seconds: Frisky's Ten Best Male Nude Scenes List

What's It Like Having Sex With Leonardo DiCaprio?

Rice University's Sex Magazine A Slap in the Face to Houston Elite

Rod Blagojevich On The Daily Show: "I'm Positive [I'm Not Gay]!"

Governor of Illinois Arrested Over Obama Senate Appointment... And That's Not Even the Weirdest Story

Weatherman Wants To Get "69 Sex?"