Scanner : David Blaine

While You Were Sleeping: The Top Gunning Lesbian

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 16:09:00 GMT

Great news, everybody, swine flu has not affected The Real World: Cancun.

This time, Sean Penn is the one to file for a separation.

A high school marching band member fended off a robber with her baton.

Check out the senior citizen sisters' heroin operation.

A teen prostitute in Sweden claims she was forced to have sex with over 500 men.

Elizabeth Edwards says her husband John should not have run for President a second time, especially after that whole idiotic affair fiasco thing.

A FEMA coloring book features a 9/11 image.

David Blaine is teaching Mia Farrow how to starve herself for publicity.

And Kelly McGillis came out of the closet.

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Anyone Else Glad To See Criss Angel And/Or David Blaine Go Down Like A Punch To The Gut?

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 19:01:00 GMT

First, there was David Blaine's widely parodied, criticized, and ignored stunt in New York City in which he claimed to have hung upside down for 60 hours. So what? He took constant breaks... it's been done before, by better, actual magicians, and to more stunning effect.

Then there are these brutal (and we do mean brutal to the point where you almost feel bad for the guy) reviews of Criss Angel's new Las Vegas show with Cirque du Soleil... they have to be seen to be, um, believed...

Angel, the host of A&E's Mindfreak "magic" and weirdness revue, celebrated the opening of his new Vegas act on Friday night, an act which cost a reported $85 million smackers. Here are the highlights for us, from a local paper's interviews with fans and other attendees:

"Everyone in the bathroom was chanting 'bull----'" from the urinals, Damon Ranger of Chicago told me Saturday. "It was absolutely awful. You can 'Believe' how bad it is -- because it's terrible!"

People streamed out of the theater on Saturday screaming about how poor it was. A group of six women was led by a woman yelling furiously, demanding their money back.

"Dude, it's a train wreck," Ranger said. On a scale of 1 to 10, he declared "Believe" a zero.
"Believe" has no compelling storyline, and it's more about dancing and unimpressive tricks, like pulling doves from a sleeve.
Moffett and Wilson walked out before the ending, because Angel started singing the finale, a cover of his "Mindfreak" TV theme song.

"He broke into song. I said, 'He's singing. Now we're leaving,'" Wilson said.

In all fairness, Angel reminded the public, the show wasn't exactly ready yet, as the opening night had a reduced ticket price and was listed as a "ticketed preview." And... oh, here... have a free Coors Light!

"The best thing was getting this free drink coupon - the worst $55 Bud Light I'll ever have."

David Blaine's performances these days fare no better. Here he is getting trashed by Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, who speaks for all of us when he mocks Blaine's coffee breaks disguised as necessary medical checkups:

Read more, via the Review Journal.

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While You Were Sleeping: Will Ferrell Answers Your Questions

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 13:53:00 GMT

The investigation into who hacked Sarah Palin's e-mail is focusing around the 20-year-old son of a Memphis Democratic State Representative.

Joe Biden is a friend of the gays.

What's the verdict on Kate Holmes on Broadway?

If Holmes felt nervous and jittery, she didn't show it. She delivered her lines with confidence and projected her girlish voice so it could be heard loud and clear. She danced around on stage with gusto. She looked lovely in two dresses that highlighted her trim yet shapely figure. She wore a brown shoulder-length hairpiece to hide her trendy pixie cut.

After the show, Cruise told a reporter Holmes was "extraordinary."

David Blaine is set to hang upside down for 60 hours in Central Park, starting on Monday.

Kathy Griffin may follow Project Runway and flee Bravo for another network.

Megan Fox thinks Zac and Vanessa's nude snaps are no biggie.

And Will Ferrell answers your questions on Funny or Die:

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Monika Jagaciak is Fourteen

Bryan Christian — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 16:46:00 GMT

So, we're beginning to wonder if, while we weren't looking, we might have gotten totally old and stuff. For instance, we just found a long gray hair dead in the center of our chest, like a bullseye left by Father Time for his good pal the Grim Reaper. Oh, also: we're kind of floored that they're letting Monika Jagacia -- a fourteen-year-old from Poland -- walk a runway in Australian Fashion Week. Sure, she's stunning and all, but... you know... fourteen! FOURTEEN!

Hey, hang on -- it can't be that weird of a question if, like, news.com.au was in such a scramble to confirm her age, right? Right?

***UPDATE 7/4 18.00: Jagaciak’s birth year, 1994, was published on the website of her mother agency, Gaga. IMG’s Sydney office claimed today that she is older than “13 or 14”. According to a representative of Gaga’s head office in Poland, with whom I have just spoken, Jagaciak’s birthday, as listed in their company records and as apparently also sighted on her passport, is 15/01/1994, making her 14.***

Here's hoping that Monika's mom and dad are sensible enough to keep her away from drugs, alcohol, couples dancing, and David Blaine.

Well, whew. We feel better now that we've gotten that off our chest. All righty then, leave us alone for a while; our programs are about to start.

[via]

Scanner : David Blaine

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While You Were Sleeping: Mark Foley's Replacement's Sex Scandal

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Criss Angel: Internet, Florida Call "Bullsh*t!" [via Remote Island]

Criss Angel Fails At "The Biggest, The Baddest, The Most Insane," The Most Lamest Trick Ever And Lives [via Remote Island]

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Monika Jagaciak is Fourteen