Scanner : Kristen Wiig

PETA's Insane Sexiest Vegetarian Alive Voting

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 15 May 2009 15:37:00 GMT

The People For the Ethical Treatment of Tasty Animals, already riding a small wave of publicity from its Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door (read: "nobody activists") competition, has decided to steal a page from People Magazine and follow-up with The Sexiest Vegetarian Alive (read: "celebrities.")

We're pretty sure that they nominated, um, every single vegetarian in Hollywood...

See what we mean at this link. The lists, separated by gender, are far too epic to reproduce here. We've narrowed it down for you, with our favorites, with some tasty photo spreads to help ya out...

The Women:
Alyssa Milano

Bryce Dallas Howard
Christie Brinkley
Cloris Leachman
Emmy Rossum

Erykah Badu

Hayden Panettiere
Jenna Jameson (!)
Kristen Wiig
Thora Birch

The Men:
Alec Baldwin
Anthony Kiedis
Casey Affleck

Forest Whitaker
Jared Leto
Kevin Bacon
Leonard Nimoy
Morrissey
Prince

Thom Yorke
Tobey Maguire

And just so you know: as of this writing, Kevin Bacon's leading everyone. Hot damn, who'da thunk it? (Last year, the winner was Anthony Kiedis, which was indeed a surprise to us.)

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10 Hottest Funny Women

Colleen Kane — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 14:30:00 GMT

"Hot," especially used in conjunction with the factor "funny" regarding women, is highly subjective. Remember when Jenny McCarthy was trying to market herself as a zany, goofy-face-making, comedic actress? Although J McC was a woman, and she was making clown faces, and was considered hot by many, this writer was not having it.

And for this writer, a great sense of humor makes someone more attractive. So in this list, when using the term "hot" for women, hilarity weighs more heavily than conventional perfect-10 looks.

10. Maya Rudolph

Maya's mom sang that song "Lovin' You." Maya herself played a mean Donatella Versace on "Saturday Night Live," generally excelled on the show playing exotic oddballs, and also starred in the sleeper hit Idiocracy.

9. Chelsea Handler

Chelsea is good with the funny interviews, but I can't get that into her because she reminds me of this one fluffhead from my high school who had platinum-blonde CC DeVille hair and orange pancake makeup, who would routinely zero in on some poor slob in our class, then verbally eviscerate them under the guise of being "funny." Not saying Chelsea is that mean, but she still reminds me of that girl.

8. Kristin Wiig

Kristen joined the SNL cast in 2006. What's known so far: this gal is conventionally very pretty, she's good with impressions and acting in sketches on "SNL," also good guesting on "Flight of the Conchords." Bigger roles are coming for her, we thinks.

7 . Sarah Silverman

Sarah is a striking beauty, and would probably be more like number one on other such lists made by people who are bigger fans of her comedic stylings. Emphasis on NUMBER ONE. GET IT?! She makes poo-poo and pee-pee jokes.

[Image: HEEB]

6. Alex Borstein

Best known as the voice of Lois Griffin on "Family Guy" and Ms. Swan on "Mad TV," Alex is one of two women among mostly men on the "Family Guy" writing staff, and is also a standup comic who isn't afraid to call herself a C. "Call yourself a cunt first, then it doesn't matter who else does," she says. Or so claims this interview.

[Image: Playgirl]

5. Niecy Nash

Niecy Nash, better known as Raineesha Williams on "Reno 911" and the host of "Clean House," is hilar. Also, she wore a huge prosthetic booty with a thong bathing suit on the red carpet. Love her.

4. Amy Poehler

"SNL." Weekend Update. Baby Mama. This photo says it all.

3. Margaret Cho

Ms. Cho has been fighting the good fight for years and continues to perform and tour regularly. One of the world's best fag hags, she will be hosting the GayVN Awards at the end of this month.

2. Janeane Garofolo

1990s: amazing standup and (less amazing) movies. 2000s: raging against the Bush regime on Air America. Always awesome.

[Image: celebs101.com]

1. Tina Fey

Before her uber-glamorous turn at this year's Oscars cemented our girl crush on Tina, her Liz Lemon on "30 Rock" was one of the only the only real, identifiable female characters on prime time. And there's the Weekend Update, the Sarah Palin impression, the Mean Girls, and being the first female head writer on "SNL."

Then there was this dress.

Le sigh.

(Who else would you expect on Scanner for #1?)

[Image: AP Photo/Chris Carlson]

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SNL's Attempt at Barack and Michelle Obama: FAIL

Emily Farris — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 18:37:00 GMT

When we first heard that Maya Rudolph would play Michelle Obama on Saturday Night Live, we got got pretty excited. Not as excited as we did when we knew Sarah Palin would make an appearance (we actually went home to watch the entire episode), but excited enough (we looked it up online).

Unfortunately, Maya Rudolph and Fred Armisen failed to evoke their subjects and while the skit was centered around the Obama campaign playing it safe, it appears the SNL writers were playing it safe—or were just plain lazy— and refused to use anything even remotely negative they had on the Democratic candidate for satire. But hello? Ashley Todd????

A shame after what a good job they've been doing with Sarah Palin. Not that we're not guilty of the same thing here at Scanner.

As usual, Kristen Wiig was funny...

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Kristen Wiig May Never Get Her Chance to Play Sarah Palin

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Kristen Wiig May Never Get Her Chance to Play Sarah Palin

Emily Farris — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 16:28:00 GMT

Okay, we lied earlier this week when we said other than Tina Fey there was no one better to play Sarah Palin than Kristen Wiig. Boy, were we wrong!

It appears that Ms. Alaska herself will make an appearance on Saturday Night Live.

Word has it Palin will be on the show THIS WEEKEND. Considering we don't have TiVo, we're canceling all of our plans, putting on our prettiest pretty, pretty princess dress and the tiara that our friend, the homecoming queen, gave us to wear to prom, and sitting down with a big bowl of moose jerky to watch this shit.

Please, sweet baby Lord Jesus Christ, let her re-enact the swimsuit competition. Please!

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[Image, Image]

In This Particular Case, We Don't Wish Kristen Wiig Well

Emily Farris — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 19:49:00 GMT

We like Kristen Wiig. Nay, we love her. But there's a lil' part of us that hopes she'll be out of a job come November 4. And here's why.

You see, Tina Fey does a great job playing Sarah Palin on "Saturday Night Live." But she already has a job, and if the Republicans win next month, SNL will need someone to play the beauty queen turned Alaska governor turned Vice President for at least four years. And who better to play that than Tina Fey? No one. Who better to play it should Tina Fey be tied up with "30 Rock?" Well, Kristen Wiig, that's who.

Straight from the mouth of the ~~Lord~~ Lorne:

'[Fey]’s gone' after the election, said Michaels. 'She has a full-time job' as the creator and star of the NBC comedy '30 Rock,' which returns Oct. 30. Michaels added that “SNL” cast member Kristin [sic] Wiig would likely play the Alaska governor should the need arise past Nov. 4."

You know, with a blonde wig she'd also make a lovely Jill Biden.

[Defamer: Should Sarah Palin Win, 'SNL' Has a Non-Tina Fey Plan B]

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Hysterical Regis Philbin Tampon Commercial Buried In Otherwise Crummy SNL Sketch

Bryan Christian — Wed, 21 May 2008 13:55:00 GMT

As usual these days, Kristen Wiig is the real MVP in this otherwise overlong and underfunny sketch what-if-ing "The Office" into Japanese TV. Overlong and underfunny, that is, except for about ten seconds in the middle of the thing, at around 2:16, when we are treated to what can only be described as a seizure-inducing Smooth Moves-type blipvert starring Darrell Hammond as a tampon-shilling Regis Philbin. "Buy these - you'll go CRAZY for them!"

Whoever it was who snuck that in there, to you we owe a huge domo arigato.

UPDATE: What's up, jerks at Hulu/NBC - too good for an embed at Scanner? Fine, whatever. Have a look at the clip here.

Vanity Fair Capitalizes Yet Again On Totally Being Wrong

Bryan Christian — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 17:29:00 GMT

... though to be fair, we don't seem to remember that Neocon Mea Culpa having nearly as hot a photoshoot.

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