Sloppy Seconds: Amy Winehouse's Topless Problem

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 21:39:00 GMT

PETA is now protesting seal clubbing... in World of Warcraft.

We don't think this is the same story about a man having his penis bitten off (by another man!) that we told you about already. In this story, the attacker... swallowed.

Samantha Ronson has asked for a restraining order against Lindsay Lohan.

Great, we already own all these damn Beatles albums. Does that mean we'll get the remastered ones for free?

Man, some people will do anything for web traffic. Here's a really ridiculous Down Shirt (the new Upskirt?) on Taylor Swift. Good Lord, she's only 18, people...

Members of Congress met with Raul Castro in Havana today.

A guy who works for Focus on the Family in Colorado has been arrested for talking dirty with a 15-year-old girl, who was actually undercover cops.

The Bush shoe thrower's sentenced has been reduced and he'll be out of jail next year.

And Amy Winehouse went streaking "through a hotel after being told to cover up." Guests were shocked to see her racing by them in the nude, but they shouldn't have been surprised unless they didn't know she was staying there.

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: Amy Winehouse is "Back in the Saddle"

While You Were Sleeping: Diablo Cody's Super Porno Limo Rides

Amy Winehouse, Topless Again, Stars in Her Most Bizarre Adventure Yet

At Least Amy Winehouse Has Good Taste in Underwear

While You Were Sleeping: Jennifer Aniston Milking It

While You Were Sleeping: Blake Fielder-Civil's 16-Year-Old Girlfriend?

On Our To-Do List: Fidel Castro

Katie Halper — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 15:32:00 GMT

Fidel Castro may be stepping down, but he's still standing erect. Whether you love him or hate him, we can all agree on one thing about Castro: El Jefe Has Got STAMINA. His speeches go on for hours and hours. His long, thick cigar is always lit. His revolution is constant and anything but predictable. And he ruled Cuba hard and firm for half a century, only stopping to come up for air and let his kid brother have his way with her.

On top of that, the insatiable, unbeatable, unstoppable Castro keeps going and going and going, in spite of his age and at least eight confirmed assassination attempts on his life. And let's be honest, when multiple U.S. presidents and CIA and FBI officials obsess over ways to eliminate the leader of an island the size of Pennsylvania, and aim many of their covert operations at said leader's cigar, it can only mean one thing: penis envy. Which is why Fidel Castro may be out of office. But he is On Our To-Do List.

[Previously on Scanner: Who Would You Rather Deluxe Edition: Fidel Castro or George W. Bush Then and Now?]

[Previously on Scanner: Your Talking Points: Fidel Castro Retires]

Scanner : Raul Castro