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Hey Rev. Jeremiah Wright: Your Sex Scandal Is Not Helping

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:39:00 GMT

Lemme get this straight, Reverend Jeremiah Wright: first, you give the Republicans the only real ammo they've ever had to go after Obama, who was supposed to be your friend, and then you made it worse by not shutting up about it and going away. You continued to give incendiary press conferences and even had to go after Obama to save face.

Now, what's this? A sex scandal? And in the most unholy of ways? Thanks a big whopping lot, jackass...

According to the New York Post and other sources, a woman named Elizabeth Payne is at the center of a love rectangle (hmm, that doesn't sound right), with the Wrong Reverend as the very public focal point:

1) 67-year-old Wright met 37-year-old Payne during the whole "Goddamn America" meltdown, when he was in Dallas visiting a protege, who was in charge of the church Payne worked at.

2) Payne was married. And so, of course, is Wright, who 20 years ago, snapped up a woman after his counseling of her marriage failed. Wow.

3) Payne was subsequently fired and divorced when allegations of her affair with Wright were made public. A lawsuit she filed to get her job back is pending...

The John Edwards Affair And Love Child Scandal: The Sequel

CBS News Correspondent Embroiled In Career-Defining Sex Scandal

Nevada Governor Sex Scandals, Part 226

Controversial New Yorker Cover Even Dumber Than We First Thought

Top 10 Outrageous Quotes From McCain's Spiritual Advisers

Latest McCain Supporter Scandal Will Boggle Your Mind

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 16:12:00 GMT

John McCain. Can we all agree he is going to carry on the Bush legacy of boneheaded remarks, thinking Vladimir Putin is the President of Germany, and associating himself with lunatic party stalwarts?

At least McCain knows how to play politics-- following extremely offensive comments made by Clayton Williams, who was about to host a six-figure fundraiser for the Senator, McCain canceled his appearance and...

Well... you're probably going to shake your head when you hear what McCain did... but you're totally gonna freak when you hear what Williams said to start this whole mess...

According to a left-wing website called The Jed Report:

Yesterday, John McCain cancelled his attendance at a fundraiser with Clayton Williams, who gave the following advice to rape victims: "As long as it's inevitable, you might as well lie back and enjoy it."

But it turns out that Williams had already raised $300,000 for McCain -- and now McCain says he is keeping it all.

What he should do is take that $300,000 and donate it to a violence against women crisis and prevention center.

We've certainly heard a boatload about "Barack Hussein Obama and Reverend Jeremiah Wright," but do we ever hear anything these days about "John McCain and Pastor Hagee" or "John McCain and Clayton Williams?" All are supporters of their respective candidates, all said explosive, offensive, even racist things and were subsequently exiled from the campaigns, but which offender is still on the news, almost daily, chastised over and over?

Ha... "liberal" media...

Via liberal media outlet the Jed Report.

Top 10 Outrageous Quotes From McCain's Spiritual Advisers

Katie Halper — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 20:30:00 GMT

Jeremiah "Obama's Pastor" Wright will appear on a PBS special with Bill Moyers tonight. Before the limelight-hogging preacher spews even more nonsense, and quotes even more ambassadors, we want to shed some light on the brilliant gems uttered by some of McCain's own spiritual advisers, Pastor John Hagee and Reverend Rod Parsley. When Hagee endorsed McCain, because he is a man of principle, McCain said he was “very honored by Pastor John Hagee’s endorsement." Reverend Parsons calls McCain a "strong, true, consistent conservative" and McCain calls Parsons "a spiritual adviser." Because the liberal media refuses to give any credit to McCain, it is up to us to be fair and balanced. So here are the top 10 Memorable Quotes said by McCain's religious advisers.

1."Do you know the difference between a woman with PMS and a snarling Doberman pinscher? The answer is lipstick. Do you know the difference between a terrorist and a woman with PMS? You can negotiate with a terrorist."

- Pastor John Hagee in his book What Every Man Wants in a Woman (Charisma House, 2005)

2. "The Quran teaches that [all Muslims have a mandate to kill Christians and Jews]. Yes, it teaches that very clearly."

-Pastor John Hagee

3." I believe that the Hurricane Katrina was, in fact, the judgment of God against the city of New Orleans.... I believe that New Orleans had a level of sin that was offensive to God, and they are -- were recipients of the judgment of God for that.... There was to be a homosexual parade there on the Monday that the Katrina came. And the promise of that parade was that it was going to reach a level of sexuality never demonstrated before in any of the other Gay Pride parades.... The Bible teaches that when you violate the law of God, that God brings punishment sometimes before the day of judgment."

-Pastor John Hagee

4. "The military will have difficultly recruiting healthy and strong heterosexuals for combat purposes. Why? Fighting in combat with a man in your fox hole that has AIDS or is HIV positive is double jeopardy"

- Pastor John Hagee on Don't Ask Don't Tell in his book What Every Man Wants in a Woman

5."It [Gay marriage] will open the door to incest, to polygamy, and every conceivable marriage arrangement demented minds can possibly conceive. If God does not then punish America, He will have to apologize to Sodom and Gomorrah."

-Pastor John Hagee on Don't Ask Don't Tell in his book What Every Man Wants in a Woman

6. "It is impossible to call yourself a Christian and defend homosexuality. There is no justification or acceptance of homosexuality.... Homosexuality means the death of society because homosexuals can recruit, but they cannot reproduce."

-Pastor John Hagee on Don't Ask Don't Tell in his book What Every Man Wants in a Woman

7. "Only a Spirit-filled woman can submit to her husband's lead. It is the natural desire of a woman to lead through feminine manipulation of the man. .... Fallen women will try to dominate the marriage. The man has the God-given role to be the loving leader of the home"

-Pastor John Hagee on Don't Ask Don't Tell in his book What Every Man Wants in a Woman

8. "I cannot tell you how important it is that we understand the true nature of Islam, that we see it for what it really is. In fact, I will tell you this: I do not believe our country can truly fulfill its divine purpose until we understand our historical conflict with Islam. I know that this statement sounds extreme, but I do not shrink from its implications. The fact is that America was founded, in part, with the intention of seeing this false religion destroyed, and I believe September 11, 2001, was a generational call to arms that we can no longer ignore."

-Parsley in Silent No More (Charisma House, 2005)

9. "Gay sexuality inevitably involves brutal physical abusiveness and the unnatural imposition of alien substances into internal organs, orally and anally, that inevitably suppress the immune system and heighten susceptibility to disease."

-Parsley in Silent No More (Charisma House, 2005)

10. "Only 1 percent of the homosexual population in America will die of old age. The average life expectancy for a homosexual in the United States of America is 43 years of age. A lesbian can only expect to live to be 45 years of age. Homosexuals represent 2 percent of the population, yet today they're carrying 60 percent of the known cases of syphilis."

previously: Reverend Jeremiah Wright: On Our To-Do List, Minor Detail About Reverend Wright's 9/11 Sermon: He Didn't Say It!

Question For Hillary: Do You Choose Your B.J. Fan Husband

Katie Halper — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 20:51:00 GMT

Hillary responded to the Obama Reverend Wright controversy by offering the following classic nugget: "You don't choose your family, but you choose what church you want to attend." That is true, we've heard (we're not church goers). Hillary is clearly suggesting that Obama can be blamed for choosing a pastor who has offended some people with his language. But what about when it comes to offensive fellatio?

Is a woman responsible for choosing a husband who offended some people with his oval-office blow job reception? One could argue that Hillary is blaming Obama not for choosing Reverend Wright as his pastor, but for choosing not to disavow Wright once the words of the pastor (or really the words of an ambassador, but who cares) were made public and played on TV and on the internets. In that case, though, if Hillary is not responsible for choosing Bill "the philandering fellatio fan" Clinton as her husband, is she responsible for not divorcing him after the semen of the president was displayed to the American people on a dark blue dress? Is a speech about racism in America more offensive than presidential fellatio and perjury? Personally, we're not offended by blow jobs or acknowledging racism in America. But we'd love to know Hillary's thoughts.

Minor Detail About Reverend Wright's 9/11 Sermon: He Didn't Say It!

Katie Halper — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:09:00 GMT

If you don't live in a cave, you've probably heard about the "controversial," "inflammatory," "over the top," "Obama Pastor" Reverend Jeremiah Wright. He's the preacher whose "fiery" speeches got Obama in a whole lot of trouble with white people. (He's also On Our "To-Do" List, but that's not germane right now.) Wright really got slammed for his 9/11 sermon. The poor media was so busy bombarding us with propaganda and manipulating video, they TOTALLY forgot to, you know, like show us the context, or, like tell the truth or whatever.

Turns out, when Reverend Wright was making those the "Anti-American" "unpatriotic" statements about 9/11, he was actually quoting someone else. You'll never guess which ~~left wing angry black man~~ white former U.S. Ambassador really uttered the words.

Edward Peck! If you don't know Edward Peck, he's a former U.S. Ambassador to Iraq and was deputy director of President Reagan’s terrorism task force. Oops!

Check out the true story here, which Roland Martin broke on Anderson Cooper's Blog:

One of the most controversial statements in this sermon was when he mentioned “chickens coming home to roost.” He was actually quoting Edward Peck, former U.S. Ambassador to Iraq and deputy director of President Reagan’s terrorism task force, who was speaking on FOX News. That’s what he told the congregation.

He was quoting Peck as saying that America’s foreign policy has put the nation in peril:

“I heard Ambassador Peck on an interview yesterday did anybody else see or hear him? He was on FOX News, this is a white man, and he was upsetting the FOX News commentators to no end, he pointed out, a white man, an ambassador, he pointed out that what Malcolm X said when he was silenced by Elijah Mohammad was in fact true, he said Americas chickens, are coming home to roost.”

Seriously Now: Obama, Richard Price, And Race in America

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 15:41:00 GMT

Barack Obama's speech in Philadelphia yesterday was designed to quell the "firestorm," as he put it, over Reverend Wright's "divisive comments ... in a racially-charged time." Did this bold move doom or revive his candidacy? And what does it say about race relations in America that this speech is, in fact, historic, if only because of the concept of the speech and not necessarily because of its ideals?

Obama's speech was met with an uncomfortable media reaction this morning. Most headlines and stories avoided direct comment on what the speech means for the campaign and, more importantly, for race in this country. “The racial wounds that remain,” boldly trumpeted Metro (New York), a headline accompanied by a picture of a crying black Obama supporter. Other than that, the general feeling among the press is that “It's 1964 all over again,” with Obama as a Martin Luther King figure, clashing against a stubborn past, marching toward a greater understanding that might be merely one landmark speech away.

“This was one of the tasks we set forth,” Obama said, echoing the civil rights era, “To continue the long march of those who came before us.”

Speaking solely for myself, I tend to believe this country has already begun the healing process. Surveys show 98% of the electorate would consider voting for a black Presidential candidate, although many still believe in that whole “but when they get in the voting booth and no one's looking, people are gonna get all racist” theory, which is based on no available evidence. (With that argument in mind, would racist Southern Republicans vote for Hillary Clinton if they entered the booth and saw Condolezza Rice as the VP on the conservative line? Just curious.)

This is not to say there isn't a large degree of racism and bigotry still prevalent today. The point is that perhaps our strongest tactic for quelling racism, for moving on, is to continue to lead by example. If Obama proves to be a great President, that would of course significantly help bring our nation together. However, having thirty minute speeches in Philadelphia about race is not only a bold yet risky political move (since it could be seen as Obama on the defensive, weakening in the eyes of the electorate), it may also be counterproductive: to bring back old dramas.

In other words, maybe the best thing for Obama to do to quash the concerns of undecideds and Hillary supporters who fear racism will doom an Obama For President Democratic ticket is to temporarily act like racism is not an issue in this electoral cycle-- sure, a tough thing to call when that is partly what inspires so many people: the possibility of the First Black President. In any case, he should laugh when the press raises their ignorant questions about an "uncertain electorate." He could take a page from one Governor Eliot Spitzer: "Screw the racists. I'm steamroller and I'm gonna roll all over you!"

That being said, should the speech give Obama momentum again, most of this post's uncertainty about its contents is null and void. After all, it's all about the momentum. That is the true motive, however it appears on the surface, for his remarks yesterday: political maneuvering. No Presidential candidate has any other real motivation, when it gets down to it.

A coda: soon after Obama spoke yesterday, I listened to a Richard Price story from a recent Moth StorySlam. Richard Price, author of “Clockers” and several classic episodes of “The Wire,” is arguably one of the most formidable white writers on race relations in this country. His story, while comic in nature, also sheds some light on how far we've come and how ignorant we still are.

Thanks to Brian Lehrer at WNYC for the Obama speech link.
Thanks to Meg McIntyre at The Moth for the Richard Price link.

Reverend Jeremiah Wright: On Our To-Do List

Katie Halper — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 20:49:00 GMT

Can we get a witness! I don't know what Dusty Springfield was talking about when she said, "The only boy who could ever reach me/ was the son of a preacher man." We'll just take the Preacher Man! Like him or not, Reverend Jeremiah Wright is one hot number. He's on fire! His motto is "Unashamedly Black and Unapologetically Christian" but what about unabashedly sexy? Whether he's buttoned down in his marine corps uniform, rocking a fro, or wearing his signature form fitting dashikis, the Reverend always looks good. He's not afraid to experiment, to push the limits, to make people uncomfortable. Plus, he'll do it in a church, he'll do it at a rally, he'll do it in front of a video camera and then he'll sell the videos! And when Jeremiah starts, look out! There's no stopping him. The man has more stamina than most men dream of. He did six years in the military, then went to Howard University to complete his undergraduate studies and receive his first Master's Degree. Then he got his second Master's Degree from the University of Chicago Divinity School. And then the Reverend got His Doctorate from the United Theological Seminary, and then he topped off his four degrees with eight honorary doctorates. And the man has passion and knows how to make the spirit move you. By the time he's done, you'll be screaming Lord Have Mercy and Hallelujah.