Scanner : SXSW

Hot or Not: Russell Brand & Lookalikes

Colleen Kane — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 14:17:00 GMT

We missed some stories during that recent week we were at SXSW, one of them being the series of paparazzi photos of Russell Brand letting it all hang out as he surveyed the new day from his hotel room.

However, during that aforementioned week we didn't miss the handful of young men in Austin who were rocking a similar look to Russell, i.e., looking like longhaired stubbly scumbags from 1990. To which our reaction was, really?

You'll see in the comments to the News of the World piece about Russell that he's quite a polarizing character. So we must hand it over to you readers. Hot or not?

Cosmo Names The Sexiest Man In the Universe...

Erykah Badu's Stalker

Colleen Kane — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 18:36:00 GMT

Erykah Badu kept everyone (including Scanner Brian) waiting for her free show at SXSW last week, but she had a good reason. Some obsessive wack job was camped out outside her house.

She twittered it, too, under her handle "fatbellybella": "Police just apprehended a stalker in front of my house. Stay tuned to details."

Here are some of those details...

Driving to Austin now. Just got on road .. Had to file police report .

Poor chic is apparently sick . I feel so awful . Police pepper sprayed her and cuffed her .

White woman mid to late 20's had visited my home 3 or so times . Brought w/ her weird writtings .

I was kind to her first 3 times . I knew something was off . She was wearing a dilla shirt today .

When I came outside she had flowers lined up in front of my house and had spray painted the no parking sign with a peace symbol .

She had several misc. Items spread out in the grass . Blue shutters, a rabbit, a tucan , and a sketch book...

I'm gonna be late for my show ... Messing around with her .

Passing thru Waco now...with dilla played loud .

So .. The lady came to the house 1st time today around 1pm .. After light threats from me and fam she left . Was parked ok the grass in front of my house

So she comes back 30 Min later .. By this time I feel violated for real .. Cause o girl wasn't threatened at all .

Had no choice but to put the ipolice In it . Tried to reason . I felt so bad for her and her dog .

When she saw cops she took off running behind neighbors house
... Obviously she had been to jail b4 cause she wanted no parts of that

By this time there were 6 cop cars , ambulance and a fire truck ..

3 officers chased her on foot whole we all watched .

She finally comes " walking " calmly around corner toward one cop car with that big ass dog

Cop snatched her hand behind her back and she began resisting violently..

Damn I'm late

Hold on my people .

... Anyhow, all I could think of while all this is going on is .. I'm gone be on media take out .. LOL

... Or bossip.com

Scanner Brian adds: "It seemed strange that no one mentioned she would be late. Her group came out without her, late already, kept chanting her name and then abruptly left the stage right at 8pm. The lights went down, so everyone left, angry. As we were at the exit gate, Badu suddenly took the stage, played two songs, and disappeared again. Apparently, they had run out of time and still had to get Explosions in the Sky onstage. Oh well, whatever."

When cops pepper-sprayed, then arrested the fan outside Badu's house, the stalker had arranged various items, like blue shutters, a rabbit, a toucan and a sketch book. Ummm, we would have called the cops, too.

Related:

Roundup: Andy Warhol Is Stalking Me

Conan and Cannolis Brought Out the Dirty Talk in Paula Deen

Sloppy Seconds: The Body Found Outside of Paula Abdul's Home

Porn and Pasties: We Missed Out

SXSW In Review: The Best Worst Week

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 14:19:00 GMT

Scanner Colleen is a spoiled brat. That's all we're going to say about this photo, which we reluctantly captured for her.

After a week in Austin, we're at Scanner Emily's in Kansas City, Missouri, en route to New York. You can practically smell the burnout on our clothes-- or maybe that's the three-day-old B.O.

Either way, we're exhausted for a 12+ hour drive through most of the state of Texas, all of Oklahoma and Kansas, and finally a quick hop over the Missouri border into Kansas City. Amazingly, Emily drove every inch of the way, including several stretches without the coffee IV in her arm. Along the way, we listened back to all the free music we'd obtained-- and here's what we discovered...

To me, at least, these were the five best acts and/or shows we stood through during Austin's South By Southwest 2009 Music Conference.

Richard Swift - we had just arrived at the Bust Party when this up-and-coming crooner/rocker took the stage at the Mohawk. We all planned to hit the bar and clean them out of Lone Star and/or Shiner Bock when Swift kicked into high gear. (Watch a song from his performance here.) Speaking for myself, I forgot my original first priority and the fact that Bishop Allen were playing next and just stood on the balcony, transfixed by the funky, sweet, and tightly-wound opening performance.

Harlem Shakes - We were at Maggie Mae's, thinking We Were Promised Jetpacks were playing. As the Jetpacks hit the stage, our first thought was, "Man, I think I had them confused with another band-- they're rockin', but something's different. A new lead singer?" It turned out, I had misread the Maggie Mae's poster and I was actually seeing Harlem Shakes, which I only realized after standing through the entire set, knowing I was seeing a true breakthrough performance. I'm glad I did.

M. Ward - Years ago, we saw M. Ward open for Cat Power at the Warsaw in Brooklyn. It was altogether-- and to this day-- the worst concert we've ever seen. Ward played a droning series of piano ballads and seemed lost. Chan came out later on and actually was lost-- wandering into a Jim Morrison-like abyss from which she finally emerged a few years later to become the great stage presence we heard through the hair in her face that night. So, it was with great reluctance that we attended BrooklynVegan's party headlined by Ward, lately of She & Him. Within seconds, we had realized two things: 1) Ward continues to distance himself from his audience and 2) the echo added to his vocals, the catchy new songs, and, most of all, the choice of acoustic guitar over piano made for a dramatic about-face from the 2003 (?) show in New York. Check out his latest record and the instantly catchy "For Beginners."

Ken Haddock - for most of the week, we enjoyed free lunches at Latitude 30's British Music Showcase. None of the performers we saw topped our first show-- that of a group of ragtag Belfast folkies hoping for their own little Once deals. Haddock was our favorite, and someone would be wise to cover his songs ASAP.

Thao with the Get Down Stay Down - I actually missed their show in the park, but Emily filled us in with some mp3s yesterday. The band, which isn't as (yet) popular as their tour mates Rilo Kiley, seem tighter and more focused than that other California band. Perhaps Thao isn't as distracted by solo projects as Jenny Lewis. Perhaps-- hate to say it-- their music is just better.

There were plenty of notable bands and memorable moments: our friends the Crystal Stilts... the surprise of seeing Dinosaur, Jr. for free at 1:30am at the Bust party... even saving Sylvain Sylvain's cell phone before he was to play with the New York Dolls. But those five artists mentioned above are the ones we came away with expecting we'll be bragging about for the next 12 months.

You should check out their music and do the same.

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

Hot Naked Chicks

While You Were Sleeping: Scanners in Austin

Scanner Emily's Suitor

Important Music Trend: Olds Backed Up by Cutes

Colleen Kane — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 13:45:00 GMT

Scanner Brian chastised me as "terrible" at SXSW in Austin last week for admiring some fine male specimens, while silmultaneously engaged to be married. What? I'm not dead! And believe it or not, there are significantly fewer fetching gents/cads in Baton Rouge than there were in Austin, so it was a special occasion.

It's great to see seasoned older musicians, but they don't always provide the best viewing experience. Some veterans throw some younguns onstage, and aesthetics instantly improve. The first instance of olds backed up by a band of cutes was the legendary Roky Erickson, who played with the Black Angels. The band looks better with the trippy colored lights (above), just like their psych rock sounds better with them. These guys and girl ROCKED IT.

And this shot above is pretty much the same but with another band member visible...and a slightly better view of the gang is here with this gratuitous publicity shot.

Exhibit B: Daniel Johnston and these cutes from Brooklyn (of course). They're called the somethings, I forget what, doesn't really matter. I know everyone in music (and Scanner Brian) thinks Daniel Johnston is the cat's meow, but he just made me kind of sad and I couldn't get into his music at all, so instead I focused on the two energetic slender young men on either side of him, before leaving two songs into the set.

So anyway, music industry and music lovers, take note. There should be more of such intergenerational performances.

Related:

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

While You Were Sleeping: Scanners in Austin

Hot Naked Chicks

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 20:12:00 GMT

It's not what you think. (Or is it?)

When Scanner Emily and I arrived at SXSW here in Austin, Tejas, we ended up staying with a couple of people who lived-- literally, as they said-- on the wrong side of the tracks on the wrong side of town. But their house was amazing-- stone walls, high ceilings, loft beds, LCD projectors, libraries, a garden, an office, and multiple bedrooms.

The best part of all was this...

Yes, they are raising baby chickens-- not for the slaughter, but because of all the delicious eggs they lay.

God bless Texas.

Related:

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Japan Destroys America Again in Cuteness Department

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While You Were Sleeping and We Should Have Been: Scanner Emily's Suitor

Colleen Kane — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 18:18:00 GMT

Last night we went to BUST magazine's SXSW party at the Mohawk, where the surprise headliners were Dinosaur, Jr. Emily was just saying that she better not leave Austin without at least making out with someone, so we split off from Scanner Brian, who she was calling BF and who might be mistaken for her bf. And that's when she caught someone's eye, big time.

Meet Emily's suitor, "Jose." Jose was smitten with Emily from first sight. In fact, I overheard him say "Who is that? Is she a writer?" As we passed him, before he approached us, then zeroed in on Emily and proceeded to tell her how pretty she is. Over and over. For a lot of the night. Jose was a very sweet, but a very intoxicated gent, bless his heart. (That's a phrase I picked up on this trip to Texas.)

I overheard him saying, "You make me want to go to Missouri all the time."

Emily tried to politely extract herself, but Jose kept finding her again, and despite us telling him that she ass rapes babies and that she has boob herpes, his ardor never waned. We also heard him tell his friends that Emily was his girlfriend.

This photo, taken by Scanner Brian, sums it up.

The best was this exchange:

Scanner Emily: "What have I been telling you all night?"

Jose: "That you're a super hot model."

Oh, Jose. But as Emily summed up, at least we got free beer. (One each. Jose's a gentleman.)

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

Verrry Sloppy Seconds: Because We'd Rather be Drinking and You Know It

#notatsxsw

Colleen Kane — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 17:40:00 GMT

We understand that not everyone is at South by Southwest, and also that everyone who isn't at South by is probably getting pretty sick of hearing about it. Twitter (which everyone is also probably pretty sick of hearing about) has a tag for you!

Any Tweets from non-Austin origins can be tagged with #notatsxsw. And what began as a meme over the past few days has already turned into a website for everyone to gather, share, and plan their non- SXSW activities and parties.

Bitter? Yes, some of the #notatsxsw taggers are. Check this tweet:

A round trip ticket from PDX to Austin has roughly same carbon footprint as upgrading from a Jetta to a Hummer for 5 months. #notatsxsw

But for some, who are planning parties via their #notatsxsw tags, it's making lemonade from lemons.

This has been a public service announcement from Scanner. We now return to #sxsw.

Related:

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

While You Were Sleeping: Scanners in Austin

Top 10 Bands That Twitter

Happy St. Patrick's Day From Our Drunk Arses to Yours

Colleen Kane — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 22:12:00 GMT

Nice job we did on Scanner today, eh? No matter, it's St. Patrick's Day and 3/4 of the team is currently gadding about a town full o' parties.
To get you in the spirit of the day, here's a favorite by the Pogues, "Sunny Side of the Street." Incidentally, I just strolled down the shady side of the street to Austin's wonderful indie bookstore Book People, because when you're as pale as my Irish American arse, you don't ever walk in the sun if you can help it.

Related:

Aer Lingus Takes a Cue From PETA

What The Bloody Hell Is St. Patrick's Day, Anyway?

St Patrick's Day Parade: Gays, KKK, and Neo Nazis Need Not Apply

Scanner Book Club: The Forbidden Apple

Emily Farris — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 19:02:00 GMT

The Scanner crew is at South by Southwest eating—and apparently drinking—too much this week. So forgive us for putting up press releases in lieu of writing every once in a while. But you know we have more important things to do, including chasing down bearded men. If we weren't here, though, we imagine we'd be at home curled up with the new book The Forbidden Apple: A Century of Sex & Sin in New York City.

For those interested in the sexual history of New York City, Ig Publishing is happy to announce the publication of The Forbidden Apple: A Century of Sex & Sin in New York City, by Kat Long. The first-ever comprehensive sexual history of New York City, The Forbidden Apple shows how many of this country’s most important sexual trends got their start in New York, and also demonstrates how the repressive forces of morality and decency have waged war against the forces of sexual liberation and freedom throughout the city’s history.
“Kat Long has provided a fascinating overview of sex in New York City since the Civil War. Everything you always wanted to know—and a lot you would never have suspected!”—Kevin Baker, author of Strivers Row, Paradise Alley and Dreamland
“Kat Long's The Forbidden Apple is a fast-paced and vivid overview documenting the conflicts between evangelical moralists and defenders of sexual expression, commercial and otherwise. Anyone interested in New York City or sex will have to pick this up.”—Timothy Gilfoyle, author, City of Eros and A Pickpocket’s Tale
The book has already received great write-ups in The Village Voice and The New York Press, and will be reviewed in The New York Times Book Review on April 5.
And, for those who like your sex live and in-person, please join us on Thursday, April 2^nd at 6:30PM as Kat discusses her book and NYC sex, past, present and future at The Tenement Museum, 108 Orchard Street, New York, 212-982-8420. Kat will be interviewed by Kevin Baker.

Related:

Scanner Book Club: Gays, Handjobs and Super Pokes

Scanner Book Club: Hiding in Hip Hop

Scanner Book Club: George Michael Autobiography

While You Were Sleeping: Scanners in Austin

Colleen Kane — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 16:03:00 GMT

Last night, all of us Scanner types at SXSW finally met up in person. This photo is about how it went. Emily was calling that dangling bit her phone's penis. I thought she looked rather like a blow-up doll in this shot, so that's going to be her Halloween costume this year.

This is Emily stepping up to the guy from the New York Times. In the background is Fairbanks acting scandalized.

But then everybody made up.

We ended the evening at a karaoke night, where Emily danced with her new boyfriend here, who was then dumped a moment later when we pursuaded her to leave.

Related:

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

Live Blogging SXSWi: Sex Lives of the Microfamous

Live Blogging SXSWi: Sexual Exploitation and Self

Sloppy Seconds: Gwyneth Paltrow Has a Cure for Joaquin Phoenix

Emily Farris — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 23:01:00 GMT

A round-up of those who are about to die. On TV, of course. [EW]

Is South by Southwest is a pointlless party? [Gawker]

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson apparently came this close to joining the mile high club on a recent Virgin Atlantic flight. [Mile High Club Book]

Researchers say a compound often found in cosmetics and foods like ice cream could help prevent the spread of HIV when used in lube. [CollegeNews]

When we find out a guy we think is cute can't spell, we get really disappointed. Same goes for Joanna Angel. But hey, she Twitters some pretty great stuff. [Twitter]

Gwyneth Paltrow thinks her buddy Joaquin Phoenix needs some street cred if he's doing to keep rapping. She thinks he should take a trip to the projects. [People]

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Live Blogging SXSWi: Sexual Exploitation and Self

Emily Farris — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 22:00:00 GMT

Another South by Southwest Interactive talk on sex, another live blog from Scanner Emily. I'm still getting used to love bloging so try to bear with me. This one will be good: sexual exploitation with blogger Violet Blue. From the description:

Sexual exploitation and sexual expression are inherent in everyone's online experiences, whether intentional or not. Bloggers, community site users, community managers, web celebs -- everyone will eventually face a sexuality-related crisis where knowing the difference, and how to protect yourself is crucial. From the personal to the professional, we will demonstrate and discuss instances, legal realities and tactics for survival and success. We'll also cover the import and impact of the Lori Drew/MySpace Suicide trial (where Drew was convicted of a federal misdemeanor for violating MySpace's terms of service in order to bully a teenager), Missouri and California's new cyberbullying laws -- and how it all applies to sexual expression and sexual attacks for individuals and social network websites.

6 PM EST
Violet Blue needs no introduction. Asks if anyone knows anoyone who's been stalked or harassed on line or in person.

How do people express themselves sexually online? ? Sex blogging. Personal ads. Creating a dating profile. Taking provocative self portraits. Using a sexy image on a social networking site. Looking for hook ups in chat room. Twittering sexy things. All intentional self expression. Two of her friends twittered a silmultaneous orgasm, in all caps.

Unintentional: Other people putting things about you in a sexual context online? Pictures? Tweets? Blog posts? Wow. Huge foot fetish groups on flickr? Your feet might appear there and you have no control.

VB says clicking a gender box (say in Facebook) it makes you a target for a certain kind of attention. Once you say you're a woman (or man) you get SPAM. True that. You get unintentionally sexualized doing just about anything. VB points out it depends on context.

6:04
She asked what does sexual harassment look like? I brought up that I hate it when men tell me to smile. A man says he tells people to smille all the time. He doesn't think of it the way I do. He's from the south.

6:06
VB asks what it looks like online? Comments on photos. People asking inappropriate questions about your sex life online. "We hate..." Facebook groups. Trolls. Comments positive or negative can be unintentional sexualization, one man says. Say: a woman posts about tech or politics and gets comments on how beautiful she is.

6:10
Idea of anonymous blogging comes up again. I really am going to have to write at length on this.

6:13
Lots of "punishing" happens online when relationships go sour. Terrorizing people.

6:13
VB consulted a HR expert to see if she could apply what sexual harassment looks like at work to what it looks like online. What structures are in place to make sure these things don't happen online?

6:16
Online and offline. Both bleed into real life. Points out "Jefferson" a sex blogger in New York who was married, openly bi, very active in the queer community. They had two kids, got divorced and as a new divorcee started blogging about his life. Wanted to interweave it all. Old sex life, new sex life, being a dad. Blogged about everything. The ex wife found it, put pieces together and decided she was going to use it against him in court to sue for full custody of their children. Him being seen as a bi male and a "dirty sex blogger" is turning him into a sexual minority in this case. Conservative judges. It's working. He's forced into therapy, sreening. All to see if he's fit to raise his children.

6:18
Guy asks, what's the moral of that story. VB says intentional online sexual exporation being used to get back at/ get at people. Man (co-moderato) points out in general sexual exploitation online is being used to hurt people.

6:19
VB brings up the Megan Meyers (sp?) case. The Missouri girl who killed herself after the mother of another young girl harassed her online. Local prosecuters tried to find a way to punish the mom, but no laws fit because it was indirect from the Internet. (Same thing came up at anonymous blogging conversation Saturday: there's no regulation online, so there are not really any laws.) Prosecutor find a way to prove she violated hacking laws using fake name when signing up for MySpace. It was a violation of the TOS.

6:24
VB telling personal story of transgendered friend who had one identity online one in the real world (as a teenager). Happens a lot with MySpace, I think. Co-moderater says no regulation works because it's a safe space for teens to do things like come out, but the no regulation also makes it a dangerous space.

6:26
Guy in argyle points out people will say worse things when they can hide behind fake/no identity. Same reason I think anonymous blogging is a bad thing (mostly). Woman asks what if it's an actual boy who was flirting with her then turned her down, would Megan still have killed herself? So now we blame social media? Man notes had the mother sent paper notes through the USPS would the prosecution have been the same?

6:30
Woman points out for teens, social networking is the only way they really communicate. For adults it's something to play with. Previous woman says: is this a good reason for parents to monitor what the kids do on social networking. I pointed out that because parents don't know the internet, how can they talk to their kids about staying safe on the internet? Another woman pointed out: AND what if they don't know how to talk to their kids about sex? A man thinks it will get better as time goes on. I agree. After the first generation of Internet kids (I guess mine?) start having kids, they should hopefully be able to talk to them about safety/sexuality on the Internet.

6:32
VB points out laws are not catching up with what's happening with technology. Uses Twitter as an example. No policy for stalking, harassing, sexual attacks. Woman had a stalker, would leave terrible Tweets, but then would delete them (even though they still show up in RSS). Co-mod says Twitter's TOS say no user can harass another online, but Twitter decided not to help this woman because there was no definition for a situation like this. WTF?

6:36
VB asks, when you come under attack sexually, what is your goal? How do you handle it? Can you remove yourself from it? Is there recourse? Do you have a hard time talking about it if it's a "sex thing?" What if some of it is true? "Remember that a lot of what's going on with the attack is you at the computer.... remove yourself from the situation and look at it objectively."

6:39
"One thing you can choose to do is ignore it." Determine the threat level. Will it hurt you in real life or is your harasser trying to get a rise out of you. She tells a personal story about her "trolls," ones who edited her wikipedia page and added untrue facts. (This is being recorded, by the way. Will try to get a link.)

6:45
VB points out that Hearts (publishes the Chronicle, where she has her column) is very complicated, and conservative. Some there stand behind her "1,000%" and try to keep her safe from "trolls."

6:47
Her ideas to fix it (if the first doesn't fix it go to the next):

1. ignore
2. report
3. record (everything! take screen caps so you have it even if your "troll" deletes the harassing words/pictures/etc.. VB publishes her death threats on her website with full headers. ballsy, but nice.. one woman asks if that puts her at fault if a fan were to do something to that person... good question)
4. strike back? (on her list, we haven't discussed it yet.. probably publishing threatening emails with headers, it's recording and striking back)
5. get help?
6. protect yourself

6:56
Another woman suggests getting social support (could fall under #5: get help) even if it's just friends, other bloggers, etc.

6:59
How do you protect yourself? VB points out there really is no such thing as 'unpublish.' Whatever is out there will end up archived somewhere. Even if something goes up for just a second, you can never take it back. VB says: If you have something sexually to hide, if you feel like someone is going to out you over, the best course of action is to out yourself first because then you have control over the situation.

7:01
VB talks about a lover she had who didn't want to be outed. Then she got an email from Gawker. Decided to out herself first "in a polite, objective contex" in hopes of not harming her lover, Xeni (from BoingBoing, who is apparently pronounced "Jenny," I did not know this). Valleywag was all over it.

7:05
Discussion still going but I have to run to a food blogger party. Hopefully there will be a link to the audio online soon!

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Live Blogging SXSWi: Sex Lives of the Microfamous

Emily Farris — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 20:30:00 GMT

After three days of trying, I finally made it to South by Southwest Interactive. While I'm here I get to sit in on some great panels and discussions about geeks, love and geek love. On today's schedule a conversation about the sex lives of the microfamous (think Julia Allison... who is here, I wonder if she'll make an appearance). I've been Twittering most of my adventures and misadventures in Austin, but I figure this one is worth live blogging. From the description:

What kind of person talks about their sex and dating life on the internet? Someone desperate for attention? Or someone who already has lots of it? For the microfamous, having a relationship in public is as much a potential career boost as it as a vulnerability.

So far, in these discussions I've felt like it's been me against the room (including one where people thought bloggers have every right to be anonymous). For this one I'll talk less and blog more, but I must apologize in advance: our painfully slow server can take up to fifteen minutes to update, so until the end of the discussion, the posts will be sporadic at best.

4:30 EST
Nick Douglass (moderator and director of BuzzFeed) introducing himself. People who never thought they'd be blogging their personal lives were sharing lots of personal details on Facebook and Twitter, moving away from live blog.

Talk about how people deal with having relationships and a sex life when everyone can see a running feed of what you're doing. How do people handle seeing your relationships play out in real time.

4:35
First topic open to the room: talking about pictures with other people. When they show up on Flickr or Facebook, do people ask you about it? Who were you with?

4:36
Melissa Gira Grant (co-moderator, Nick's girlfriend, apparently) "refreshing the page is not going to give me any answers." Pick up the phone.

4:38
How many people have unfriended an ex? I told my story! I deleted my ex from all of my social networking lists, and rejected his friend request a year later. I'm not the only one.

4:48
As a blogger, or public person, do you talk to the person you're seeing or about to see about how much of your personal live(s) will end up on the blog? For me (Scanner Emily) it's hard, but I try only to mention antecdotes in passing if they relate to a story I'm writing (e.g. I once dated a guy who wouldn't go down on me, blah, blah).

4:43
Author of The Man Plan: Drive Men Wild, Not Away talking about her personal experience, being transparent about a few things, not all.

4:45
Nick says bloggers (even Gawker) might not always be so cruel to the Microfamous, but the commenters are. (So are some of you Scanner commenters!)

4:46
Man points out more revelation done in the comments than on the actual websites.

4:47
Melissa says she made a vow to not look at comments for the first two weeks when she started writing at Valleywag. I (Scanner Emily) almost cried the first few weeks I was at Scanner. Man, you guys hated me! She points out that as a woman writing about sex, people will sexualize her. Also, I'm confused. She talked about coming out, being queer, but I thought she was with Nick. Maybe not?

4:50
Woman says if you put yourself in public, that's the rules of the game. People will comment and say mean things. There's nothing you can do. Melissa says there is: call them on it. Another woman asks if writers/bloggers have a tendency to write about their relationships and people they interact with. (Yes, we do. Though some of us try to be discreet.) She points out that because of Google she feels blocked. She has a No-Google policy when she first starts dating someone: I won't google you, don't google me. I (Scanner Emily) do that with people I start dating, too. Especially if I meet them online. But, she says she told someone "I could tell you this story, but why don't you go read about it on my blog?"

4:45
Woman with awesome pink hair says that people who come to see her (in unnamed public format) leave horrible comments about her. Digital format into her real life. She chooses not to read them because they're terrible. See commeters, words can hurt us!

4:55
Woman says by default she does not blog the name of the person she's seeing. Duh. I never would either. Guy she's seeing not okay with pictures either. Totally understandable. She says we take pictures and tag them in media world, that's what we do to be nice to each other here (SXSWi, media world at large) but people not in media don't see it that way.

4:57
We're talking about writing about lovers. One woman says it's a tool for telling the story about who you are. I (Scanner Emily) think it's fine as long as you aren't specific (or, well, if the person will never read it... bearded bartender dad).

4:59
Woman asks, what about the microfame component? People who write about themselves and their sex lives to reach a level of notoriety? Turn it into job opportunities, traffic, etc.

5:02
Melissa wants to talk about "leveraging who you fuck to get ahead." Woman who works in music industry says if she sleeps with someone at work she becomes "that girl." She says Facebook is great for making things private but it takes a lot of time.

5:04
One sex blogger said to her lover "your name on my blog will be Johanna." Another woman asks if this is negotiating a contract. Melissa says if she gets written about on a dating sex blog, she wants a linkback. So many different levels of privacy, and everybody wants a different one. So hard to navigate.

5:05
Guy brings up we're publishing everything so we'll live forever on the Internet. I (Scanner Emily) wonder if my grandkids will read my Twitter feed someday? Or Scanner? Never thought about that.

5:06
Melissa says it's impossible to put your whole life on the internet. She says a lot but there's a lot she doesn't say. (Me, too). I brought up finding my grandmother's letter about losing her virginity. It will be on such a larger scale when we're dead. Our kids and grandkids and great grandkids will know everything!

5:09
Older man (oops David Carr, thanks Rachel Sklar) points out, "historically, there is nothing kids find less interesting than their parents' sex life."

5:12
Woman who works in TV doesn't believe in monogamy, wonders how much she has to be transparent about those things... Wonders if her sex life will be shocking or will it help her to control it later on down the road?

5:14
Rachel Sklar says when you add a public element, and things aren't going well, you self edit, you add a PR element. Ha. We're our own relationship spin doctors. How does this affect the relationship, though?

5:17
Woman asks if Tweeters worry about stalkers? I think if you're worried about that you should lock your Twitter or not blog specifics of where you're going. Again, it's the different privacy levels thing. I only Tweet my location at SXSW so my friends here can find me here. But when I was in New York? No way. If I have a stalker and he wants to make his way to Austin and buy a badge to find me in meeting room 5, I at least owe him a handshake and a smile, right? Okay, not really but you know what I'm saying.

5:23
Melissa says it's an ongoing process of curating what's on the web about us. Amen.

5:24
How many of us are happy with our top result on Google? I'm okay with mine, but I bet it won't stay there forever. Nick points out you need your side of the story showing up. Try to get it up to the top. Luckily, my site(s) show up first most of the time/so far. But it will probably change someday.

5:25
Woman from How Not to Get Fucked as a Blogger discussion talking about how she was outed after she wrote a book based on her sex blog. All anonymous (until she was outed of course). She believes bloggers should be anonymous. I do not. Maybe I'll write about it at length later. She says be careful what you say but try to have power in other mediums so you can have some control over what's out there about you. She has dealt with the British press, though. Apparently those guys and gals are first-class fuckers.

5:28
Two minutes to the end of the panel and "doucebag" is finally used. Thanks, Rachel Sklar.

5:29
Guy warns about updating FB relationship status. I took all alerts off of mine. And it does not say my relationship status. Won't. Don't want to do that to myself or anyone else. Ever.

5:30
Melissa points out tools that seem inoffensive make us share more and more of our lives. And that everybody is blogging about sex, whether we're doing it intentionally or not. Of course, it's all we think about. Well for me sex and food. And shoes. And how broke I am. But still. Closing words "be brave, take up space and let the douchebags look like the douchebags they are."

[Image]

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

Colleen Kane — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:05:00 GMT

Three of us Scanners (Emily, Brian, and yours truly) are at South by Southwest this week, though we have yet to convene. However, we do have some SXSW-related sexy lady news to report, naturally.

Two Suicide Girls, Lynn LaValee and Jessica Zollman, celebrated their upcoming roommate-dom here in Austin by getting new matching tatts themed after their shared love for a certain favorite-on-the-Internet food item...

Bacon.

Here's Jessica's self-portrait.

And here's Lynn's bicep's bacon + grease.

Jessica told the L.A. Times, "Raw meat, sexuality, food -- I think they all go hand in hand."

Related:

Suicide Girls Rated "F" by Better Business Bureau

SuicideGirls.com Lays Off Bloggers, Including Ensign Wesley Crusher

Celebrity Ink: Angelina Jolie's Tattoos Look Really Great Next to Her Breasts

Images: Jay Zombie's flickr & twitter, L.A.Times blogs

Found on the Road: Four-Flavored Condom?

Emily Farris — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 15:28:00 GMT

I've been pretty much living in Planes, Trains and Automobiles for the past 36 or so hours. After waiting eleven hours in an airport yesterday, I rode a Greyhound for four hours to quite possibly also spend today in another airport. Anyway, one great thing about a bus ride? Truck stops! I love shopping at truck stops. And yesterday, while squatting over a disgusting toilet, I looked up to find the condom machine. Four flavored condoms for 75-cents? What a deal! I knew it was finally time to pop my condom-machine cherry. Unfortunately, it turns out it wasn't such a good deal after all.

Either it is one four-flavored condom (WTF?) or, more likely, it is one of four flavors. Will it be banana? Chocolate? Strawberry? Or mint (marijuana??)?

Only you can tell. FInish this sentence:

If I had a ____-flavored condom I'd ______________________ Fox News.

and send it to scanner@nerve.com. The best answer will be posted here and the winner will receive this mystery condom via the USPS. The Springfield, MO airport may not have fresh coffee or hot food but it has to have a post office. Right?

More goodies from my travels coming next week.

(For the very interested among you, I'm Tiwttering my misadventures. The less sleep I get—I'm working on four hours in three days—the better my Twats, it seems.)

Related:

Rachael Ray Grabs Some Rockstar Ass

Emily Farris — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 22:59:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Trust us, it happened. Pagesix.com reported on it. But we saw it go down.

Read more...