Can I Have A Window Seat In The Non-Masturbating Section?

Katie Halper — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 20:45:00 GMT

A 21-year old woman is suing American Airlines for failing to protect her from involuntarily and unknowingly joining the mile high club. Apparently as the woman slept during her flight from LA to Dallas, she got more than just beauty sleep. 20 minutes before the flight landed, the woman woke up to discover that a man had moved into the seat next to her, was looking at her, and masturbating. The woman responded by turning towards the window and nervously running her fingers through her hair when, in a There's Something About Mary moment (no, not the franks and beans one), she realized she had “a substantial amount of an extremely sticky substance in her hair,” -- and it wasn't an anti-frizz hair product. The woman then cried and unsuccessfully attempted to get the attention of the flight attendants. According to the law suit, "a passenger in the row in front of the woman comforted her and verified the semen in her hair." This sounds traumatic, and nobody wants to blame the victim. But it seems like the American Airlines flight attendants acted appropriately-- once the plane landed, they notified the airport police and the man was arrested. And anyone who has ever needed an extra blanket knows how hard it is to get the attention of a flight attendant. But we also know the old adage, "if at first you don't succeed in getting the attention of a flight attendant to report being masturbated on, dust yourself off and try again, even if that means getting out of your seat while the fastened seat belt sign is on."

Scanner : There's Something About Mary

Can I Have A Window Seat In The Non-Masturbating Section?