Scanner : breast feeding

Sloppy Seconds: Wanda Sykes Says "I Do"

Emily Farris — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 01:11:00 GMT

We usually wait until we have a mid-week lull to watch Flight of the Conchords (On Demand, baby!) but we're going to watch it as soon as we're done writing this post just so we can see the "Garfunkeling" in better quality. Also, why is it that Jemaine is the only one ever getting laid? [Jezebel]

A woman who was pulled over for breast-feeding her baby while driving gave a TV interview about it while breast-feeding her baby. She said the baby wasn't willing to wait for the milk at that time (when she was driving, and apparently also when she was giving the interview). Um, okay. [WLFI]

Umm... Skittles are now Twittering. Taste the rainbow? (Is this how Twitter is going to make money?) [TechnologyExpert]

Jennifer Aniston is still talking about her divorce from Brad Pitt. But to be fair, if we were her, we probably would be, too. [Jossip]

Rumor has it Lindsay Lohan's friends are now on Lilo death watch. [FadedYouth]

Recently-out Wanda Sykes has teamed up with a California non-profit to educate the public on equal marriage. [AfterEllen]

Salma Hayek Has Completed the Fameball Trifecta

Emily Farris — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 21:08:00 GMT

One: Salma Hayek rocks 30 Rock as Alec Baldwin's love interest.

Two: Salma Hayek lets an African baby suckle her ample teet.

Three: Salma Hayek marries her baby daddy and French millionaire, Francois-Henri Pinault, on Valentine's Day.

According to French magazine Le Point, as translated by People.com, Hayek, 42, married Francois-Henri Pinault, 46, on Saturday (Valentine’s Day) in the City Hall of the Sixth Arrondissement in central Paris, which is owned by Pinault’s family.

Well played, Salma.

Related:

Salma Hayek Breastfeeds An African Baby, We Feel Bad For Being Grossed Out

Top 5 Salma Hayek Sex Scenes

Sloppy Seconds: It's Friday And Salma Hayek Is Single

In Which We Finally Put The Lid on 2008: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of Last Year

Emily Farris — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 22:22:00 GMT

Ed note: Yes, we're running it every day this week.

Now that we're settling comfortably into 2009, we have a little time to reflect on 2008. And what kind of seemingly professional blog would we be if we didn't compile our top ten posts of last year? With boobs, Mormons, abortion and booze we hope the list is everything you hoped it would be and more.

Read more...

Scanner's Greatest Hits: The Top 10 Posts of 2008

Emily Farris — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 20:18:00 GMT

Ed note: Yes, we're running it every day this week.

Read more...

In Case You Missed It Yesterday: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Emily Farris — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 19:02:00 GMT

Read more...

Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Emily Farris — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 21:07:00 GMT

10. "The Real World: Facebook" or Scanner Emily vs. The Mormons

The joy of being a blogger, as opposed to a reporter or newspaper writer (you know, "real journalists"), is that we have the freedom to throw whatever the hell we want up on the web for everyone to see. Sometimes it's a picture or a video, but in November we were so incensed by a discussion over Proposition 8 that happened on a former classmate's Facebook page, we had to share it with you. Read more...

9. The Room: The Best Bad Movie We've Never Seen

Another great thing about being a blogger is that as long as we can make them funny, we are free to write about things that are not exactly relevant, or even timely. But we consider "The Room," a five-year-old box office flop, to be totally worth a few hundred words and a few minutes out of our day. Read more...

8. Review: Mail Goggles

At first we really thought Google's Mail Goggles were a good idea—nay, a great idea. Then we realized we're better at math when we're drunk. Read more...

7. RNC Day Three: Sarah Palin Makes Dick Cheney Look Like Al Gore

Originally, we brought Scanner Brian on to cover politics. When he could no longer deny his fondness for boobies and tabloid news stories, however, things got a little more exciting for all of us. But that didn't keep him from going to the RNC and reporting back to us each day. Read more...

6. Groupie Shocked To Find Out Pop Music Douche Used Her For Her Body

Really, folks, the headline says it all. Read more...

5. Breastfeeding: If You Can Ask For It, You Don't Get To Do It

If you do not want to watch footage of a seven-year-old girl suckling on her mother's teet, do not click on this post. Read more...

4. The La Pequeña Series

You may think the Internet is for porn, but we know that it was really created for this tiny man and his big videos.

a) Video of the Day: Pequeña Amy Winehouse

b) Video of the Day: The Only Thing Better than Pequeña Amy Winehouse...

c) Video of the Day: La Pequeña Sarah Palin

3. 10-Year-Old Boy Is the Lone Protester of Nude Sunbathing

Nothing warms our hearts more than 10-year-old neocons with misspelled, homemade signs. Read more...

2. Roe v. Wade 35 Years Later

On the 35th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, we wrote what was, by far, the most personal and revealing post (save for "we got drunk and did something stupid" posts) we've ever written on Scanner. While there was definitely a "we got drunk and did something stupid" element, we wanted to write about abortion without being preachy. And we'll admit, we were pretty bummed this post got so little traffic. Read more...

1. An Open Letter to Ashley Alexandra Dupre: We're Gonna Write a Book!

We sometimes wonder if we're in the wrong business. Because while we often crack ourselves up as bloggers, other times we imagine we could help people profit from their seemingly unfortunate situations. For example, earlier this year when it was revealed that then New York Governor Eliot Spitzer had been seeing a high class call girl from New Jersey, we stepped in almost immediately to make sure one Miss Ashley Alexandra Dupre didn't become Joe "Boobies" Francis' newest meal ticket. While she didn't exactly heed our advice, we sincerely hope she's doing okay. Read more...

Related:

Scanner Emily's Top 10 Lessons Learned in 2008

Scanner Brian's Year in Review

Ashlee Thinks We Don't See Them...

Emily Farris — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 18:46:00 GMT

But we do...

Sloppy Seconds: Pete Wentz and His Penis (and His Wife!) Win the Weird Baby Name Game

Who Would You Rather: Jessica Simpson vs. Ashlee Simpson Wentz

[Image]

Caption This: Britney is Keeping Her Kids This Time

Emily Farris — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:16:00 GMT

[Image]

PETA Asks Ben and Jerry's to Admit that "Breast Is Best"

Nicole Pasulka — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 16:11:00 GMT

Oh PETA! At it again! This time the rogue activists and media starlets are demanding that Ben and Jerry's begin making ice cream with slightly more humane ingredients.

Such as...

That's right, humane as in human, that is. PETA has requested that Ben and Jerry's begin making ice cream from women's breast milk. But before you get your bras in a tangle, the idea isn't a PETA original. It came from some dude in Switzerland.

"PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves."

Yum. PETA once agains ruins a good message and intention with a shameless, creepy stunt. It'ss becoming a weekly event.

Sloppy Seconds: Demi Moore And Her Boob Squirt

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 21:04:00 GMT

Strip clubs in Denver are reporting a decline in business... just since the DNC began.

Why is anyone surprised Axl Rose doesn't bother with pickup lines? If we were him, we wouldn't either... although, um, we probably still wouldn't put it quite like he did.

Scariest headline of the day, via CNN: Airline removes life vests to lighten load

Sheryl Crow, Stevie Wonder and "i.am" John Legend join obvious choice will.i.am to close out tonight's convention.

We barely even remember hearing about this movie, and now it's getting a sequel?

Your boyhood idols: where are they now?

Just in case, Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty has canceled his weekend interviews.

Kimora Lee Simmons denies she's pregnant. Meaning someone reportedly cared enough to print that she may have been.

Do you believe this story:

Madonna's brother Christopher Ciccone has accused Demi Moore of deliberately squirting breast milk at his gay friends.

We don't.

Related:

Todd Solondz Moves Reign of Terror Off Shore

Sloppy Seconds: Could We Possibly Love Steve Carell Any More?

The Life-Saving Power of Breasts

Add Denver To The List Of "Places That Scare Us"

Nude Bicyclists Protest... Global Warming?

Hot or Not: Jodie Marsh's Boobs?

The Life-Saving Power of Breasts

Emily Farris — Fri, 23 May 2008 13:54:00 GMT

We love breasts as much as the next guy, or gal, but let's all remember that they serve a much greater purpose than sexual entertainment. Breasts can save lives — especially in China, where one police officer has been nursing babies who have been orphaned or separated from their mothers after the massive earthquake that struck the country nearly two weeks ago.

Officer Jiang Xiaojuan, 29, the mother of a 6-month-old boy, responded to the call of duty and the instincts of motherhood when the magnitude-7.9 quake struck on May 12.
"I am breast-feeding, so I can feed babies. I didn't think of it much," she said. "It is a mother's reaction and a basic duty as a police officer to help."
The death toll in the earthquake jumped Thursday to more than 51,000, and more than 29,000 are missing, according to government figures. Thousands of children have been orphaned; many others have mothers who simply can't feed them.
At one point, Jiang was feeding nine babies.
"Some of the moms were injured; their fathers were dead ... five of them were orphans. They've gone away to an orphanage now," she said.
She still feeds two babies, including Zhao Lyuyang, son of a woman who survived the quake but whose breast milk stopped flowing because of the traumatic conditions.

We nominate this woman to be the next Superwoman or Wonderwoman.

[CNN: Officer breast-feeds quake orphans]

(Thanks, ProfRobert!)

Yes, Christina Aguilera Has Humongous Breasts

Emily Farris — Thu, 22 May 2008 13:33:00 GMT

Even after losing forty pounds of baby weight, Christina Aguilera still has ginormous breasts. But just how big are they?

An E cup, folks. A freaking E cup. They shouldn't even be called cup sizes at that point. She's in mixing bowl territory. And she's a pretty small woman.

We can't even fathom that. It seems kind-of painful and annoying. Or maybe we're just trying to make ourselves feel better about our breastal inadequacy (which we know is not a real term, but you're laughing with us, not at us, right?).

To be fair, she's breast feeding and will probably go down a cup size or or four when she stops. And her boobs will still be huge.

[Us: Christina Aguilera reveals her breast size]

Scanner : breast feeding

Sloppy Seconds: Wanda Sykes Says "I Do"

Salma Hayek Has Completed the Fameball Trifecta

Salma Hayek Breastfeeds An African Baby, We Feel Bad For Being Grossed Out

Top 5 Salma Hayek Sex Scenes

Sloppy Seconds: It's Friday And Salma Hayek Is Single

In Which We Finally Put The Lid on 2008: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of Last Year

Top 10 Scanner Posts of 2008: Because We Can Never Get Enough Ashley Alexandra Dupre

Scanner's Greatest Hits: The Top 10 Posts of 2008

In Case You Missed It Yesterday: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Scanner Emily's Top 10 Lessons Learned in 2008

Ashlee Thinks We Don't See Them...

Ashlee Simpson Sure is Knocked Up

Sloppy Seconds: Pete Wentz and His Penis (and His Wife!) Win the Weird Baby Name Game

Caption This: Britney is Keeping Her Kids This Time

PETA Asks Ben and Jerry's to Admit that "Breast Is Best"

Sloppy Seconds: Demi Moore And Her Boob Squirt

Todd Solondz Moves Reign of Terror Off Shore

Sloppy Seconds: Could We Possibly Love Steve Carell Any More?

The Life-Saving Power of Breasts

Add Denver To The List Of "Places That Scare Us"

Nude Bicyclists Protest... Global Warming?

Hot or Not: Jodie Marsh's Boobs?

The Life-Saving Power of Breasts

Yes, Christina Aguilera Has Humongous Breasts