Scanner : gisele bundchen

Nearly-Naked Gisele Poses With a Bunch of Naked Black Men, Raises Questions of Race

Emily Farris — Wed, 06 May 2009 23:01:00 GMT

Norwegian fashion photographer Sølve Sundsbø recently shot a series with supermodel Gisele Bündchen surrounded by very buff, very naked black men. The contrast in skin tones is striking, but are we supposed to read more into it?

As one commenter over at Project Rungay said: "wow, those photos are fierce. can't tell if the guys are her slaves or if they're raping her. interesting race dialogue. the first photo is super sexy."

What do you think? Have a look and let us know in the comments section.

Related:

The Art of the Nude Supermodel

Video Of The Day: Because Sometimes Racism Is Funny!

Once You Go Black

[Racialicous via Jezebel]

While You Were Sleeping: Mad Men Getting Fired Up

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 06 May 2009 13:53:00 GMT

Arnold Schwarzenegger is considering decriminalizing marijuana altogether in California, possibly for budgetary reasons.

One of my celebrity crushes, Bebe Neuwirth, is now married.

Dumber-than-that-Carolina-contestant Miss California is in danger of losing her crown... or so they say.

Mad Men is back in production, with I Shot Andy Warhol's Jared Harris joining the cast for next season.

Gisele Bundchen may be pregnant.

We hate to admit it, but we can't get enough of the President and Vice President doing silly shit like driving to Virginia to eat at a hamburger place with the word "Hell" in its name.

Up until last night, we were in New Orleans, where this man is suing the police for one dollar over his right to wear a skirt in public.

Another reason for 50 Cent to goof on him: Rick Ross keeps his sunglasses on during sex.

And Jennifer Hudson and Rihanna both canceled shows.

Related:

PETA Names the Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door...

Top 5 Charlize Theron Sex Scenes

Lisa Rinna Poses For Playboy At 45, Just For the Hell of It

18-Year-Old Boy Arrested in Most Bizarre Sex Tape Bust Yet

Desperate Housewife Calls in the Cops in Nude Photo Blog War

Who Is Vanity Fair's Most Beautiful Woman in the World?

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 13:54:00 GMT

People Magazine has The Sexiest Man Alive. Maxim has its Sexiest Woman of the Year. Vanity Fair, desperate to singlehandedly save Conde Nast, has just announced the winner of its Most Beautiful Woman in the World poll. Of course, the press release makes no mention of a followup contest involving men, since that wouldn't sell at the newsstand.

First of all, is their #1 choice the right one or was ~~Kate Beckinsale~~ ~~Kate Winslet~~ ~~Scanners Emily/Colleen~~ unfairly snubbed?

7. Queen Rania of Jordan. Are we crazy or is the only media outlet in the world that even mentions her starts with a "V" and ends with an "anity Fair?" They must be bestfriendsforver with the Queen, because Graydon Carter's staff mentions her every chance they get.

6. Bar Rafaeli. This girl's agent is seriously working overtime-- he got her a date and (probably) a fake relationship with Leonardo DiCaprio, the cover of Sports Illustrated, and onto this list without anyone even knowing who she is. That's not to say we dislike her-- seriously, we're impressed with her sudden success.

5. Jennifer Connelly. Jennifer Connelly is too skinny to be as beautiful as she was even five years ago. End of story.

4. Penelope Cruz. While our comments above could hold weight here, we decided not to diss Penelope after all. She is thin, yes, but she's not hideous for it-- and she couldn't be more beautiful the way she is now.

3. Scarlett Johansson. Arguably the most desirable woman in the world, Scarlett Johansson has seemed a bit less appealing lately. That has nothing to do with our getting used to her beauty and everything to do with her vicinity to Ryan Reynolds

2. Giselle Bundchen. She was our pick for #1, if only because she's on the cover of Vanity Fair this month. Apparently, that wasn't enough to put her over the top... meaning there's a surprise winner...

1. Angelina Jolie. Agree or disagree?

Via Vanity Fair.

Who Would You Rather: Brad Pitt vs. Every Other Man in the World?

While You Were Sleeping: Joining the Mile High Club

Trend Alert: Women Leaving Men For Other Women

While You Were Sleeping: The Accidental Porn Screening

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 13:57:00 GMT

Another day and another story indicating Al Franken is closer than ever to becoming Senator from Minnesota... five months after his election.

The pedestrian who died of a heart attack during the G20 protest in England is seen in a video just moments before his death being assaulted by police for the crime of not walking away fast enough.

Tommy Lee's porn-star-loving pilot had his license officially revoked after the Judge saw that blow job video...

Costa Rican police are investigating allegations made by the paparazzi that they were chased away from the Gisele Bundchen-Tom Brady wedding by gunfire.

David Allen Grier was voting off that dancing show about B-list stars getting their big break.

Fidel Castro asked how he can help Barack Obama's Presidency.

Meanwhile, Kal Penn has been hired by the Barack Obama Presidency.

A substitute teacher accidentally showed the regular teacher's porn tape during a geography class.

Moran Stirring Up Controversy By Suggesting We Need To Get Rid Of Obama

While You Were Sleeping: If Even Apple Is In Trouble...

While You Were Sleeping: Drunk Breastfeeding

Skinny Blonde Beer As Misogynist As It Is Gimmicky

Sarah Palin Porn Ain't Goin' Nowhere, No Ho Ho Ho

While You Were Sleeping: John Mayer's Penis

While You Were Sleeping: Britain's Next Topless Model

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 14:08:00 GMT

Don't cancel your Mexican vacation, says the country's President... the shocking drug violence there will be all cleared up, you know, in 2012.

Brittany Snow will appear in a new spinoff of Gossip Girl, a popular educational program.

Another supermodel bites the dust... Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady were married in Santa Monica yesterday, after having denied the wedding rumors for months, even years.

Jake and Reese are rumored to be the next celebrity couple that will walk down the aisle.

Kate Nash is already one step ahead of them, although her fiancee is an unknown.

Just the latest in a long line of 45-year-old hotties to grace the nudie mag, Lisa Rinna will be the next one to pose for Playboy.

This unanimous Supreme Court ruling on religious monuments in public parks is extremely troublesome.

The woman in the car during Morgan Freeman's car accident claims he was drunk. Oh, and she's absolutely not his mistress. And one more: she's suing him for not denying the mistress thing.

Hero of the day? A mother ran into her daughter's rapist while he was out of jail on a weekend pass. He asked after her daughter, apparently in a gleeful manner, and so she followed him into a bar, poured a bottle of petrol all over him and... struck a match...

And Britain's Next Top Model is already topless...

Topless Coffee Shop Opens In Maine, Not Without Controversy, Bottoms

The Rise and Fall of Lindsay Lohan

Obama Crashes Carnival Party, Thanks to Naked Carnival Queen

Sloppy Seconds: As a Supermodel Goes Off the Market a Crackhead Goes On

Emily Farris — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 00:02:00 GMT

India, the Bush family's cat, is dead at 18. [Yahoo!]

Alan S. Geisler, creator of red onion sauce for hotdogs, is dead at 78. [City Room]

Oh, snap. We forgot George W. Bush was still the president. [DailyIntel]

It looks like Blake Fielder-Civil really is planning to divorce that crackhead Amy Winehouse. [People]

After numerous rumors that the couple engaged earlier, supermodel Gisele Bundchen and Patriots quarterback Tom Brady are finally, really engaged. The world is preparing for more beautiful babies. [People]

[Image]

While You Were Sleeping: Mexican Beauty Queen Stripped... Of Her Title

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 14:03:00 GMT

Players and connoisseurs of music, Thelonious Monk's advice on playing in his band is an essential look at a mad genius.

Never been kissed? These kooks hadn't either, so they decided to make out in public and then tell the Daily News their real names.

Courtney Love and the Kardashians are at war...

Courtney Love faces possible legal action after accusing socialite Kim Kardashian's brother Rob of punching one of her gay employees.
In an angry rant on her MySpace page written on Wednesday, Love alleged that Kardashian's brother Rob Jr. broke the nose of her employee while calling him a "faggot" in September.

Love writes: "Rob Jr. cold socked and punched my employee right in his face for no reason and broke his nose after my guy was hanging out with his pal Brody Jenner one night outside Hyde lounge."

Talk about adding insult to injury: not only is he named Mike Hunt, but the internet makes fun of his name when he's murdered.

At last, CNN does something good with its website: it reports on a 17-year-old Maryland kid who heard about violence against Sudanese women who go looking for firewood and decided to raise money to send them stoves.

The war between Lindsay Lohan and her father, and her father and Samantha Ronson, rages on.

A Mexican beauty queen lost her title after getting caught up in a drug sweep.

$100,000 worth of cashews were stolen in Sydney yesterday.

And rumors involving the possible engagement of Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen turn out to have been false (we think.)

Gisele Bundchen Finds Another Excuse To Take Off Her Clothes

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 16:32:00 GMT

Thank God there's something else to talk about today.

These were for the 30th Anniversary issue of American Photo, whatever the Christ that is. Nobody cares about you American Photo, just give us your half-naked snaps of Gisele and move along...

Seriously, though, we do dig Gisele on a non-superficial level as well, and our speculation on her personality is confirmed by the photographer:

His favorite Gisele? "It would be the chill Gisele, which is just us hanging out on vacation, with her acting silly and laughing in front of the camera," Nino Muñoz says. "Although sexy Gisele in six-inch pumps isn't bad, either."

The above totally pointless photos via American Photo, of course.

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: The Last True Supermodel

Gisele Bundchen's Latest Nude Shoot May Be Her Finest Work Yet

Did You Vote? Then Babeland Would Like To Give You A Free Sex Toy...

Kate Winslet Takes it Off for Vanity Fair

Top 5 Sexiest Celebrity Costumes

Olga Kurylenko: "My Treasure Trove of Topless Photos Don't Count As Porn"

The World's Largest Flower Is A Giant Deformed Penis

While You Were Sleeping: Sex and Chocolate

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 13:29:00 GMT

The government took over Freddie Mac and Sallie Mae, once again proving that if you bring in enough money, it doesn't matter who you fuck over, there will always be someone willing to bail you out.

That Asian junkie you've been reading about has thankfully kicked his addiction. You remember the story: he's an elephant.

Gisele Bundchen clears up those rumors about her "impending" marriage to Tom Brady:

Don’t place any bets on when Gisele Bündchen might marry boyfriend Tom Brady, says the supermodel. “I’m happy as I am,” she tells the Spanish edition of Vogue in its September issue. “Why is the whole world worked up about my getting married? I’m having a great time and I want to enjoy it.”

The Jerry Seinfeld commercial for Microsoft appears to have stumped everyone. Everyone.

Could the Top Chef: Ultimate Fighting Championship spinoff be far away in the future?

Obama and McCain will honor the victims of 9/11 and speak at Columbia University on the anniversary of the attacks. And yes, they were attacks, not bombings.

Meanwhile, the conservatives in Canada are learning how employ nasty Rovian tactics at home: the Prime Minister dissolved parliament in hopes the third election in just a few months will increase the conservative grip on government.

Between My Sheets polled the Top 100 sex bloggers of 2008. Obviously, we didn't make it because Between My Sheets isn't hip enough, damn it!

And Teri Hatcher has figured out the secret to life. Luckily for guys everywhere, it involves having sex with her:

[She] has motherly advice for her daughter – and the Desperate Housewives star is only too eager to share it. “Have great sex [and] eat the chocolate,” the single mom advises 10-year-old Emerson – and the general reading public – in Hatcher’s October column for Britain’s Glamour magazine.

Related:

Lindsay Lohan's "Secret Talent" Was Buried Forever

Quote of the Day: "I molded my ass."

Pure, Selfish, Chocolate-Filled Pleasure

Sloppy Seconds: Woman Who Delivered Baby In Car For VP?

While You Were Sleeping: Who Looks Best In A Bikini?

Giorgia Palmas Becomes Overnight Internet Sensation Based On One Photo

Gisele Bundchen's Latest Nude Shoot May Be Her Finest Work Yet

Sloppy Seconds: Woman Who Delivered Baby In Car For VP?

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 19:33:00 GMT

Would you guzzle five kilos of chili-spaghetti for fame and glory? In Ohio?

It's like the 21st century version of that football quiz scene from Diner: the videogamer who programmed his girlfriend's game to propose to her for him when she reached a high score has gotten married.

John Mayer is wisely avoiding dating celebrities, at least for now.

How do you end a two-month world tour in West Palm Beach? If you’re John Mayer, with a beautiful blonde cocktail waitress waiting in the wings. While stealing glances backstage at the striking blonde during his mic breaks, Mayer was definitely in party mode at the packed final show of the tour at the Cruzan Amphitheater...

James Gandolfini got married over the weekend in Hawaii. Strangely, we didn't hear any Fox News anchors attacking him for vacationing in this time of great crisis.

Why didn't McCain pick this woman, who delivered her own baby in her car, for VP?

Smokey and The Bandit star and singer Jerry Reed has died.

Kids in Chicago skipped school... to protest school funding.

Anything Gisele Bundchen does in a magazine is apparently news.

Anything Britney Spears doesn't do in Vegas doesn't stay in Vegas.

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: Who Looks Best In A Bikini?

While You Were Sleeping: The Last True Supermodel

S&M Finally Goes Mainstream, Thanks To The Fashion World

While You Were Sleeping: Obama Narrows His Choices

Vegas Presents The Erotic Heritage Museum

Those Who Can, Do; Those Who Can't, Teach Porn Techniques...

While You Were Sleeping: Who Looks Best In A Bikini?

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 12:44:00 GMT

Whoever claims full responsibility for the fire at Westboro Baptist Church wants to assure you that they did their best.

Man, what the hell is with Verne Troyer and his ex? Either they're the two biggest liars ever, or they tried to reenact Sopranos episodes on each other every night while still together.

Are these the biggest nipples in Hollywood? Yeah, we didn't think so either, nor do we particularly care.

An alleged murderer on the run since Christmas was arrested playing Guitar Hero at Wal-Mart.

More rumors of a Tom Brady-Gisele Bundchen engagement.

Michael Moore and other Michigan cats serenaded Madonna ahead of the Material WhateverItIsNow's 50th birthday.

Is it any surprise that Ursula Andress tops a poll of British survey respondents? Especially for the Best On-Screen Bikini Performance, or however it was phrased? (2nd: Carrie Fisher in Return of the Jedi, 3rd Halle Berry in the Dr. No homage she was in.)

And some sad news: Christina Applegate is suffering from breast cancer. Thankfully, the disease is believed to be in the early stages and Applegate is expected to make it out okay.

Scanner Highs And Lows: But If You Are In The Mood...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 22:02:00 GMT

...maybe your sex drive isn't as high as it should be. Maybe you're burnt out from fantasizing about lingerie models. Or maybe you've just been mauled by a crazed grizzly bear.

In any case, you need some refreshment...

Highs:

CNN solved that sex drive problem, ladies. Sort of.

The Daily Show's five sexiest clips turned us on, for sure.

Anne Hathaway, as viewed from the side, caused total computer hardware failure. From drooling on the keyboard.

At least she didn't pick herself: Naomi Campbell named the last true supermodel, and we have to agree with her on the sexiness factor.

Lows:

Snickers didn't bring on a bout of the chuckles.

Ashley Alexandra Durpe couldn't seem to keep it in her pants. We mean... never mind.

Viewed from a distance, Brad Pitt is a) just as sexy or b) a lousy father?

The man eating bears had nothing to do with sex, but they, um, scared the pants off us. Does that count?

The 9/11 thing... got us hot and bothered? Nice try, but not really... mainly just bothered.

There's a 17-year-old girl stripping in Iowa. 17: not acceptable. 18: here's a dollar for your humiliation.

If engaging in fellatio this weekend, take this girl's advice: "Do Not Swallow!"

While You Were Sleeping: The Last True Supermodel

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 14:31:00 GMT

Anne Hathaway's karaoke song is rather fitting, don't you think?

The incident with his mom and sister was apparently not the only one during Christian Bale's wild Friday.

A list of the top Hollywood bachelors that in any way involves Ryan Seacrest is invalidated automatically.

Guy answers call from the cops on his cell phone by saying: "Dude, I can't talk, I'm being chased by the police," and hanging up.

Speaking of police, they arrested a man for stealing money from a fountain in a Florida mall. His total haul? 42 cents.

You're not gonna believe who Forbes magazine thinks is the best investment in Hollywood. (You were right if you said "whoever it is, it's definitely not Tom Cruise.")

And Naomi Campbell says she wasn't the "last true supermodel":

"Models need to earn their stripes - I just think the term is used a little too loosely.
"Kate Moss is obviously a supermodel but, after Gisele [Bundchen], I don't think there's been one."

Via IMDB.

Related:

Scanner Roundtable: What's Your Karaoke Song?

Sloppy Seconds: Whose Illegitimate Half Sister is This?

Sloppy Seconds: Update On The Christian Bale Story

Gisele Bundchen's Latest Nude Shoot May Be Her Finest Work Yet

Rumor Mongering (or Simple Math): Is Naomi Campbell's Vagina Infected?

UPDATE: Link fixed.

Scanner Highs And Lows: Nudie Shoot City

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 22:02:00 GMT

This week we welcomed Verena Von Pfetten to the Scanner fold, although this photo and caption has nothing to do with nudie shoots or this post.

There were a couple of nude photos, including rugby players and supermodels, but more memorably... there were animal sex photos!

HIGHS:

Scanner Nicole may have found the love of her life. A few readers will be fighting her for him, for sure.

We found some gay animals. Better yet-- we found pictures of gay animals fucking!

We took it from behind while playing Super Mario Bros.

A porn star solved the Catholic crisis.

A whole shitload of British tourists were busted after an oral sex contest went so, so right.

We fawned over the greatest pet story ever told.

Mischa Barton almost looked kind of hot (sort of) in her latest almost-nude attempt at relevance.

LOWS:

We dug some mispellings. Not just in our posts-- in tatoos!

Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel broke up. Should this one be in the "Highs?"

Officer Dick would fine Gisele Bundchen for her droopy pants. Although we're not going to stop her from taking these photos.

We found that 63% women have been unnecessarily groped on the subway. We would put "getting jizzed on" under "unnecessary" as well.

Sienna Miller stole a husband... and our hearts. Well, not really, she just kind of rubbed us the wrong way while going topless.

We were disappointed British lesbians did not pick Susan Sarandon as their "dream date." However, the winner is still pretty tantalizing at 62.

And the self-proclaimed "World's Greatest Dad" was arrested. Wanna guess what he's in for?

Gisele Bundchen's Latest Nude Shoot May Be Her Finest Work Yet

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 14:59:00 GMT

Some of the blogs are trying to make Gisele Bundchen's "raciest photo shoot ever" into some sort of scandal. People, she's way past legal, she can make her own choices on whether to be nude or not. Where's the scandal in these?

(And by the way, yes, we have seen her in the buff a billion times, but these are... well... let's just say a whole lot buff-er....)

There are more at this link-- at least a couple of them are working checking out. Bundchen

is demonstrating "how to wear denim without wearing denim." But she'd never wear them in real life.
"Only Mario [Testino] could make me take those pictures," says Bundchen. "He was the first photographer that shot me when I started ... People are going to say my butt is showing too much in these but, Im sorry, my butt showed more in Victoria's Secret. For seven years my butt was in every catalogue."
[On the Miley Cyrus uproars] Can you believe this is news? It's ridiculous. And the politicians aren't going to create any laws about this [kind of media saturation]. They're very happy with it. They can go around doing what they want and no one cares because we're more concerned about some 15-year-old girl holding a sheet in a picture. No one cares about what [the politicians are] screwing up, or how much money is being lost.

More talk from Gisele via the Huffington Post and News.au. All photographs by Mario Testino and from this month's V.

Related:

New Miley Cyrus Photo Scandal Already Exaggerated Beyond Belief

Miley Cyrus To Remake Sex and the City?

Eva Mendes Does Incredibly Hot Vogue Photo Shoot

Gisele Bundchen Worth More Than Carla Bruni Naked. Why?

Sloppy Seconds: Half-Naked Woman At Blue Jays Game

Sloppy Seconds: Which Sex and the City Star Had Breast Cancer, For Real?

Emily Farris — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 21:28:00 GMT

A very blonde woman who is divorcing her rich husband aired her dirty laundry on YouTube, and while we kind-of think it's wrong, we kind-of love it. [BoingBoing]

Is the Marilyn Monroe sex tape a hoax? Say it ain't so! [Fleshbot]

A young Christian TV host came out. Isn't it sad that he "knows" this will end his career in Christian television? [Jossip]

Cindy McCain is going to guest co-host The View on Monday. We wonder if she'll do her own make-up. [Yahoo!]

Will Gisele Bundchen star in the next Austin Powers? There's going to be another Austin Powers. Oh, fine. [DailyStab]

Kim Cattrall's character Samantha may have battled breast cancer on Sex and the City, but it was Cynthia Nixon who had it (and beat it) in real life. Nixon didn't want paparazzi at the hospital, so she kept her diagnosis private. Plus, everyone was too worried about her lezzing it up to care about her health. Whew! [US Weekly]

Gisele Bundchen Worth More Than Carla Bruni Naked. Why?

Emily Farris — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 12:59:00 GMT

While a nude picture of French first lady Carla Bruni may have gone for $91,000 at a recent auction, Brazillian supermodel Gisele Bundchen can rest assured that she is still, as Scanner Bryan would put it, hot as the fucking sun. A naked picture of Bundchen (after the jump) earned more than twice as much as a nude photo of Bruni at Christie's auction house last week.

We're a little surprised; we thought the whole first lady naked thing would be worth more than the run-of-the-mill, dating a football player, supermodel naked thing. What do you think?

Thank you. That will be $193,000. We accept PayPal and cold, hard cash.

[Daily News: Nude photo of French first lady sells in New York for $91,000]

[Previously: Nude Carla Bruni Photo Sells For 91 Grand; Cambodian Charity Refuses Profits]

Caption This: Ratty White Pants Divide Nation, Supermodel's Buns

Bryan Christian — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 20:05:00 GMT

Click through for bigger version.

[img courtesy, via]

If We Had Millions of Dollars, We Would Have the Best Nudie Collection in the World

Bryan Christian — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 18:00:00 GMT

Yeah. We know what you're thinking: "Um,,, um,,, wow... um... holy... (drool)." We had the same thought.

Christie's in New York will soon be host to what we're thinking might be the greatest single collection of naked women since the Wu-Tang Clan toured Iceland. (You ain't heard those stories?) These are the basics:

-- The collection was owned by Gert Elfering and contains works by Irving Penn, Richard Avedon, Helmut Newton, Diane Arbus, Robert Mapplethorpe, Guy Bourdin, and Horst P. Horst.

-- Featured subjects include Gisele Bundchen, Kate Moss, Brigette Bardot, Lauren Hutton, and -- we're guessing -- a bunch of women in masks ('cause that's Helmut Newton's thing, right?)

-- The sale takes place April 10, at Christie's at Rockefeller Center, NYC and is expected to fetch $3 million or so.

-- When the dust settles, none of us will own any of these photos.

Great, got that out of the way. Let's get to the pics!

Click for hi-res versions, suitable for framing (if that's what you want to call it).

Moss, adopting a classic pose.

Let us all pause to reflect upon the powerhouse that is Lauren Hutton.

We find Bardot to be an enigmatic figure. This picture makes it even more so.

See what we mean about those masks?

Gisele Skips VS Fashion Show to Shill Shoes, Wear Water?

Bryan Christian — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 17:39:00 GMT

Remember yesterday how we were missing our former favorite non-Klum Victoria's Secret model Gisele at the VS Fashion Show? It went something like this:

Hey, where's Gisele? Didn't she used to do this show too? Isn't she still plastered all over the VS catalogs on our bathroom floor? Oh, maybe they tried to pay her in US Dollars! Dollars! Ha ha! Can you imagine!

...or something like that. Anyway, we found her: posing in a dress made of nothing but water. Oh and probably lots of Photoshop. All to promote what appears to be a Gisele-branded line of shoes.

Normally, we wouldn't just put any smutty Brazilian advert up here, you understand, but we were kind of missing Gisele last night... And now it's painfully clear why.

Click through for the hi-res-ness.