Scanner : holiday gift guide: under $50

Holiday Gift Guide: IOU

Alex Zalben — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 16:00:00 GMT

Let’s be honest: It’s easy to forget when Christmas is. Is it the second Tuesday of December this year? Maybe it’s in January? Or maybe it’s one of those years where we don’t celebrate Christmas*. It’s difficult to remember, and then, of course, the day sneaks up on you, and you don’t have any presents.

With most stores closed the day before, and you clearly panicking**, it’s time to break out the trustiest tool in the gift-giver’s book***: an IOU.

Since we’re being honest here, you’re fighting an uphill battle with an IOU, so there’s a couple of tips and tricks to remember that will turn your IOU into an IOHWOW****!

Make it Nice: Make sure your IOU looks nice, neat, and composed. Clearly, you haven’t put enough thought into things to get a gift, but try to get a nice card, and write your IOU neatly and thoughtfully.
Make it Personal: To that end, still include something personal to the person you’re giving an IOU to. Don’t just hand them an open ended IOU, like “IOU… Something… Dude.” Again, clearly you’re not thoughtful enough to remember them until you started heading out to their house, but try very, very hard to think about the things that they like.
Make it Vague: Do they like theater? Then make it an IOU for “a night out at the theater.” Again, you don’t know this person very well to not get them an actual gift*****. This way, you don’t have to remember what show they actually like, and you’re also not committing to $300 tickets to go see Young Frankenstein. Remember, “Free Shakespeare in the Park” is still “theater.”
Make it Funny: End of the day, regardless of what the IOU is for, people aren’t stupid. They know you forgot to get them a gift, and are going to be mildly bummed. The above items will help, but be sure to introduce a healthy dose of humor, whether it’s at your own expense (“Me? Forget something?”), or a good joke on the card. This will, at least, get them laughing, which is a positive response, which will make them forget that they hate you. Psychology!
Make it Not “One Free Massage”: Seriously. I don't care how good everybody says your massages are, it’s played out, and it’s creepy, especially if it’s for your family members. Unless, I guess, you’re a professional masseuse. But that’s the one exception. Otherwise, cut it out, dudes.

And that’s all you need to know! Hopefully, you won’t need any of these tips, but if you do, best of luck, and Happy Holidays!

*Or maybe you’re Jewish, like me.

**How do I know? You’re reading Nerve.com on Christmas Eve, clearly you’re panicking about something.

***Don’t pick out the rustiest tool; that’s creepy.

****I’m getting paid to do this, right?

*****Yes, I know we’re probably talking about your Mom.******

******These asterisks are getting out of control.

Holiday Gift Guide: Nothing Says 'Merry Christmas' Like a Last-Minute Magazine Subscription

Wendy Atterberry — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 14:00:00 GMT

If you've waited until the last minute to finish your Christmas shopping, it's too late to buy online, and the thought of fighting crowds at the stores this afternoon makes you crave Makers Mark on the rocks, stat, have no fear. Since a magazine subscription can't be wrapped and placed under the tree anyway, your recipient never has to know you saved him or her for last. For highly literate, midbrow, culture fiends, you really can't go wrong with any of these great magazines: Believer (focusing on books and writers), RADAR (focusing on pop culture, politics, scandal, and style), Stop Smiling (for a limited time, buy one subscription, get a free one for yourself), and Time Out (city guide for residents of Chicago, New York or any of the other 120 International Time Out cities).

Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates! This will be my last Gift Guide post since, well, Christmas is tomorrow, but if you want more ideas for completely frivolous ways to spend your money all year long, join me at my site Awesome, where I blog everyday about awesome shit you really don't need, but oughtta get anyway.

Holiday Gift Guide: Skinny Lighter

Wendy Atterberry — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 18:00:00 GMT

Offering someone a light with one of these stylish stick lighters sure beats passing a book of matches or a cheap drugstore childproof lighter. After all, to be banished outside for a smoke is one thing, to be banished without the proper accessories is just embarrassing. A perfect stocking stuffer for your favorite smoker (including the potheads). (Fitzsu, $28)

Holiday Gift Guide: A Cylon To Call Your Own

Alex Zalben — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 16:00:00 GMT

Excuse me while I nerd out on you for a little bit, but Battlestar Galactica is one of the best TV shows ever, and I think pretty much anyone who watches it will agree. In fact, I don’t think anyone who’s actually watched the series would think otherwise.

Do you have that friend, though, who’s taken their love of the show to the next level? Have they started saying “frak” instead of cursing? Did you find them absently mindedly humming “All Along the Watchtower?” Were they also really disappointed in Bionic Woman, but kept watching it to play “Catch which BSG actor they’re using this week?”

Then why not help them take their addiction to the next level, with a life-size Cylon from Sideshow Collectibles?

Yes, you can outfit their apartment with fine-art, books, or, you know, furniture. Or, they could have a seven foot tall statue of an evil murderous robot, that will scare the crap out of them at three in the morning when they stumble home from the local Sci-Fi Convention*.

And if that wasn’t enough, the LEDs in the Cylon’s visor work, so there will always be a sneaking suspicion that Sideshow is actually making Cylons, and just waiting for the right moment to activate them for their world-wide takeover.

You can pick one up for your “friend” for $7900. Or, a cheaper option ($5-$20), check out Hasbro’s line of Battlestar standees, perfect for cubicles, and slightly less likely to kill. (Sideshow Collectibles) (Hasbro)

*”Battlestar isn’t Science Fiction, it’s Science Speculation. GOD!”

Holiday Gift Guide: Penis Pokey

Wendy Atterberry — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 15:00:00 GMT

What's the holidays without a little family fun? Sure, you've got Trivial Pursuit, Pictionary, and MadGab to keep you busy after the gifts are open and brunch has been served. And then you've got Penis Pokey. A full-color illustrated board book with large cut-out holes on each page where one thing is missing--a "banana, perhaps, a fire hose, or a sea serpent. Male readers can complete the illustrations using the talents God has given them." For female readers, I guess there's always our tongues. If the thought of watching your father or brother complete the photos with their God-given talents creeps your out, you might want to save this one for your New Year's party. Nothing like bringing in 2008 with lots of full frontal. (Amazon, $9.95).

Holiday Gift Guide: Bi-Polar Doormat

Wendy Atterberry — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 14:00:00 GMT

This awesome doormat is perfect for the bi-polar people on your list. When they're manic, they can position the doormat to read "Come in," and everyone can go inside and have lots of crazy fun. And when they're depressed, they can simply turn the doormat around to the "Go Away" side and everyone will know to immediately turn around and run! From UnicaHome, which offers overnight, 2-day and 3-day shipping for all you last-minute shoppers. ($27.50)

Holiday Gift Guide: J. Shoes

Wendy Atterberry — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 13:00:00 GMT

Ladies, you know how you're always bitching at your man to clean up his style and ditch those worn-out sneakers already? Well, now it's your chance to make that happen! Get him a pair of J. Shoes for Christmas and make both of you happy in the process. He'll love that they're comfortable and cool looking, and you'll love that they're clean and cool looking. Buy them at Bluefly and save up to 56%. ($40-$95).

Holiday Gift Guide: Rain Gear

Wendy Atterberry — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 00:00:00 GMT

Like bills, taxes, heartbreak, and gas, rain is just one of those inevitable unpleasant things in life. Luckily, unlike those other unavoidables, rain provides the perfect opportunity to look cute while jumping in puddles. Accessories like these fun, colorful rainboots (Plueys, $55) and rosebush umbrella (FinnStyle, $40) can even make one look forward to a few drops from the sky. I think I can safely say, though, that there's nothing that will have the same effect on gas.

Holiday Gift Guide: Tumblers

Wendy Atterberry — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 22:00:00 GMT

There are plenty of things that go well with a cold beer: New York style pizza, making out, a second beer. Somehow though, it's all just a little bit better when the beer is served in a great glass, like these tumblers made from recycled Mexican Sol' bottles. Then again, you can stick to a lame glass and just wait for the fifth beer for everything to get a bit better... (Elsewares, $32)

Holiday Gift Guide: Wi-Fi Detector Shirt

Alex Zalben — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 21:00:00 GMT

Here’s the perfect gift for the signal-hunter in your life: The Wi-Fi Detector Shirt. This completely washable t-shirt (as long as you remove the included battery pack) will show you how strong the wi-fi signal strength is in the area near his chest for up to three hours a charge, and is sure to make him the hit of any party. Did I say party? I meant, “park.”

You can pick one up at Think Geek (purveyors of all the finest geek paraphernalia) for only $29.99, plus your dignity.

Holiday Gift Guide: Colorful Scarf

Wendy Atterberry — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 20:00:00 GMT

Most of us hate cold weather and merely tolerate winter because we have no choice. There are some things that make December - March more tolerable, though:

a warm body to cozy to
or even a lukewarm body will do
potluck dinner parties
with plenty of wine
or skip the dinner and just have the wine
a warm, colorful, stylish scarf wrapped around the neck gypsy-style (UrbanOutfitters, $24)

Holiday Gift Guide: Marshmallow Shooter

Alex Zalben — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 19:00:00 GMT

Now here’s a practical gift the whole family can enjoy, combining two of humankinds favorite things: warfare, and marshmallows. The Marshmallow Shooter, winner of the 2006 and 2007 Creative Child’s Magazine Top Toy of the Year*, takes mini-marshmallows, and turns them into delicious weapons of mini-destruction.

The basic Marshmallow Shooter holds 25 mini-marshmallows, and will shoot them at high speeds an astonishing thirty feet. I hope it’s with pin-point accuracy, otherwise my I really shouldn’t have put my cup of hot cocoa on the other side of the room.

The delightfully named Marshmallowville also has a number of other shooters, including their insane looking new line of bows. You can check out all of the action at their website, as well as a handy store locator. The basic Marshmallow Shooter model will cost around $25, so be sure to pick one up for the giant kid in your life. (Marshmallowville)

*Though, let’s be honest: how creative they be if they couldn’t think of a new Top Toy in 2007? Honestly, Creative Child Magazine, I’m disappointed in you.

Holiday Gift Guide: Coasters

Wendy Atterberry — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 18:00:00 GMT

Let's talk coasters, shall we? They're a timeless sort of gift that break gender and age borders and are universally needed. People never seem to have enough of them, mostly because one set usually only has 4 coasters, so if you live with one or two people and you have more than a couple of guests at one time, someone is going to go without, and that is a bad thing. A very bad thing. So coasters are a good gift. A practical gift. But that doesn't mean they can't be fun! Here are a few options for various "types" on your holiday list: international beer coasters for the beer snob (Etsy, $3), birds 'n trees for the whimsical one (wishingfish, $20), records for the music lover (UncommonGoods, $18), blue henna for the dreamer (Loft Party, $35), and razor wire for the urbanite (Etsy, $15).

Holiday Gift Guide: Modern Day June Cleavers

Wendy Atterberry — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 16:00:00 GMT

Women of the 70's may have burned their bras and aprons and lipgloss and who knows what else, but modern women, or post-post modern women, or whatever you want to call us have re-embraced our feminine sides. We're hanging out in the kitchen and we like it *. And we're even happier in there when we've got pretty stuff to look at, use, and wear like these dish towels ($14-18), oven mitts ($7.95-$14), and aprons ($28-$38) from Anthropologie.

* Okay, not all of us like hanging out in the kitchen. In fact, some of us would rather stick our tongues in an electric mixer than use one to bake cookies, but that doesn't mean we don't still appreciate pretty towels and stuff. After all, we want nice things to look at when we go rummaging through the kitchen drawers looking for our favorite take-out menu.

Holiday Gift Guide: Not Your Grandma's Wallet

Wendy Atterberry — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 15:00:00 GMT

A wallet might seem like the kind of gift a grandmother would give her grandson for Christmas, but unless Ol' Grandma is hip on modern design trends, I promise she's not giving away any of these for the holidays: db clay wallets are like little pieces of art that can be carried in a back pocket everyday ($48-$85); J. Fold sports wallets are sleek, stylish, and super durable to endure extreme wear and tear (Amazon, $60); this one's made with duct tape, so you know it'll come in handy if the recipient ever needs to execute super MacGyver moves (UncommonGoods, $20).

Holiday Gift Guide: iBoxer

Alex Zalben — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 00:00:00 GMT

Coffee Makers? Donut Trucks? Is this Nerve.com, or lame-os.com*? I thought so. Then it's time to get all sexy up in this Gift Guide, don’t you think?

Without further ado, what more perfect gift than iPod Underwear for the holidays. It’s the present that says, “I like music, but I’m totally hot for you. Also, I hope you already have an iPod.”

From Play (which actually spells their letter “A” with a play sign, but I’m too lazy to figure out how to code the webding for that) comes two different versions: iBoxer for Men, and iBoxer for Women.

These 93% cotton, 7% spandex boxers come in a variety of colors, are available for under $20, and sport a nifty little pocket big enough to hold an iPod, cell phone, or snacks**.

And they’re so sexy, you’re going to want to rip them right off your Special Friend. But don’t do that, because if they’re listening to an iPod from their pants, they have their earbuds in, and ripping ‘em out is gonna hurt like a mofo.

The Play website has a handy guide to find out where you can pick these up in person, or online. And, most places I checked out are having a sale on ‘em for the Holidays, so why not pick up a pair for your music obsessed sweetie today? (Play Underwear)

*Not an actual website.

**Crazy idea: This may be a way better place to store your contraceptive of choice than your wallet. Not to defeat the point of this post or anything.

Holiday Gift Guide: Urban Beauty Survival Set

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 21:00:00 GMT

With "all the beauty essentials you need to survive in the urban jungle," the Urban Survival Set is perfect for, you guessed it, the urban glam girl. Featuring an assortment of the popular Urban Decay's best-selling products in travel sizes, the set can be thrown into a clutch bag and pulled out between office and dinner, dinner and the bar, and the bar and after-party. Hell, it can even be discretely used the next morning before the walk-of-shame home. All it's missing is advil for the hangover. (Sephora, $42)

Holiday Gift Guide: Make 'Em Laugh

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 19:40:00 GMT

Let's face it, the holidays can be a really crappy time for some people. They have a way of magnifying all the shit that's wrong in our lives: unemployment, dysfunctional family, love handles, depleted bank account, no sex in months, nose hair. I mean, God, it's all just so depressing, so why not give a gift that'll make 'em laugh, like the complete first series of the hilarious Flight of the Conchords ($23.99). Even if the music, lyrics, and dialogue weren't funny enough to keep me watching, there's the added bonus of Jemaine's luscious, pillowy lips.

And if comedy records are more their thing, there's one thing that is a definite must-have. With 9 CDs, including a disc of previously unissued material, the Richard Pryor box set will keep them amused for at least a day or two, which is a day or two they won't have to think about how depressed they are, so score! (Amazon.com, ($49.97)

Holiday Gift Guide: Dart Coat Darts

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 18:45:00 GMT

Sure, darts are a fun bar game--especially when the pitchers are halfprice and the jukebox is loaded with all your favorites, but their usefulness doesn't end there. Darts also make great stir tabs, hardy poster tacks, and with the addition of screw tips, very convenient wall-mounted coat hooks! A great stocking stuffer for the person who needs a bit of encouragement keeping tidy. (Elsewares, $34)

Holiday Gift Guide: Daily Grind

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 16:45:00 GMT

Somehow, my gyne and dentist appointments, boring meetings, and interviews for gigs I know I won't get seem a tad more tolerable when I'm scheduling them in a cute planner like this one from poketo ($17), which comes with monthly, weekly, address, list, and blank pages, as well as pockets to store receipts, business cards and the like. A great gift for the person always on the go who needs something with a little more personality than your average planner from Office Max.

Of course, some people prefer to keep track of schedules on a wall calendar. For the modern art lover, this moon phase calendar from the MoMA Design store is hot ($17). How about an award-winner, like this one by Herman Yu, featuring 12 original botanical images (Rare Device, $33), or this beautiful--and popular--handmade calendar from Creative Thursday ($35)?

Holiday Gift Guide: A Little Bling

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 15:00:00 GMT

So you want to give your girl some jewelry this Christmas but you have no idea where to begin. I'm sure she's probably been dropping 2-ton hits left and right, but you've failed to pick up on them. I get it, it's a guy thing. We start talking about jewelry, cramps, and Brad Pitt and you immediately tune us out. All the more reason to do right by us with some pretty bling. She may not forget about that naked ring finger on her left hand, but these other options are bound to please long enough to buy you a little time: fauna goldfish necklace (Paraphernalia, $17), delicate stainless steel etched rose earrings (Rare Device, $30), flying birds bracelet (I love blocks, $35), silver inlay ebony wood necklace (Broxup Jewelry, $64), colored resin necklace and earrings set (Metals Girl, $84), colorful satellite ring (Anne Kiel Jewelry, $91).

Holiday Gift Guide: Endo Magnet

Wendy Atterberry — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 13:39:00 GMT

Strong enough to hold kitchen utensils, an iPod, and even a Chuck Taylor, the endo magnet is an attractive, well-designed, super functional magnet that's ideal for the cook who needs easy access to his or her recipes, or the person who'd lose his head--or at least his shoe--if it weren't magnetized to something. With a simple push of a button, the endo magnet releases whatever it's holding, without the need to release the magnet itself from its place...making it a perfect stocking-stuffer for lazy people, too. (The Endo, $10-12)

Holiday Gift Guide: Bento Box

Wendy Atterberry — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 22:00:00 GMT

The great thing about these bento boxes is that they magically erase the calories of everything inside. You could theoretically carry a bacon double cheeseburger and a couple of Twix bars in them and your lunch would be completely calorie-free.

Well okay, not really, but the bento box is a much more functional and better looking alternative to a brown bag. And it may not make a lunch calorie-free, but you know it'll make it taste better. Give one to the person on your list who's trying to pack a lunch to work more often--or who'd just like to make all of his co-workers crazy with jealousy. (Plastica, $38)

Holiday Gift Guide: Lucky Beggar Coin Purse

Wendy Atterberry — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 18:00:00 GMT

New Yorkers will recognize the ubiquitous New York City coffee cup design, often seen in the hands of panhandlers on street corners, but reincarnated here as a clever coin purse. I received one recently as a gift and everytime I pull it out, someone has something to say about. I could be wearing awesome boots, or have a great haircut, or totally smell like roses and lavender and fancy perfume, but without fail, my coin purse always upstages me. A perfect gift for the homesick New Yorker. (wishingfish, $29.95)

Holiday Gift Guide: Mad Gab

Alex Zalben — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 17:00:00 GMT

"Give a board game as a present? What am I, lame?" Well, imaginary blog reader person, I don't know. You may be totally lame. However, I do know that giving Mad Gab will not MAKE you lame, it'll make you the coolest guy at the party. Other than Steve. Steve is super cool.

Mad Gab, unlike other BORED games (get it? I am enormously clever) is actually a ton of fun, and won't make a party stop in it's tracks. Basically, each team of players has a very small amount of time to read a phrase on a card, which is a common (or sometimes totally uncommon) mishearing of a phrase. You repeat the phrase as fast as you can, as many times as you can, until you figure out what the actual phrase is. For example, "Canoe Key Pace He Grit," becomes "Can You Keep a Secret?" It's actually simultaneously easier, and more difficult than you think it is.

And now, two fun-facts, free of charge:

1) Mad Gab's puzzles are actually known as mondegreens, which are mishearings of common phrases.

2) The term mondegreen is actually a mondegreen itself. It comes from an article in Harper's Magazine, where the author wrote about mis-remembering a line of a favorite childhood poem, "and laid him on green," as "and Lady Mondegreen."

See? Weren't those facts fun? Didn't think you were going to learn something today, did you?

Mad Gab is available at your finer toy stores everywhere, though you can pick it up at Amazon, cause, you know, you're an adult. And, it will only set you back about Night Teen Doll Hers. See? I told youI was enormously clever. Take that, STEVE.

Holiday Gift Guide: Cup it in your Hand

Wendy Atterberry — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 16:00:00 GMT

I know that with some wines, you're supposed to hold the stem of your glass when you're drinking them, but I can never remember which ones. I end up cupping the glass and pinching the stem at all the wrong times...which seems to be a recurring theme in my life. I say make it easy on everyone with these stemless wine glasses--they're cool looking and they remove all the anxiety of where you're supposed to put your hand...at least when it comes to the wine. (CB2, $1.95-$2.50)

Holiday Gift Guide: Luxe Link

Wendy Atterberry — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 14:49:00 GMT

Most women I know count their purse collection in the top five things they love in life (I'll leave the other top four to your imagination). They also enjoy going out, but they hate having to rest their purses on the dirty floors of dive bars, crowded clubs, and busy restaurants. That's why this luxe link is such a handy invention--it provides a little hook on which to hang purses, freeing women's minds--and hands--to focus on, ahem, more important matters. (luxe link, $35)

Holiday Gift Guide: Krups Fast-Touch Coffee Grinder

Alex Zalben — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 23:00:00 GMT

Here’s what I love about this guy: he’s little. Yes, this coffee grinder is a he, to get that out of the way. Deal with it. But he’s a coffee grinder with a teeny-tiny kitchen footprint that looks sleek and classy. He’s also got a powerful, long-lasting motor, and comes from a reliable manufacturer. So you can rest easy knowing your beans are in good hands. You know what I’m talking about.

What you’re NOT going to get with the Fast-Touch is choices… It’s grind for drip, and that’s it. But, you can grind up to 12 cups worth of beans at a time, in about twenty seconds. And, it may seem like a small feature to point out, but the blades are activated only by pressing down on the closed lid, meaning there’s no way it can chop your fingers off. This is the sort of thing that stops me from buying a lot of kitchen gadgets.

The Fast-Touch is also one of the cheaper coffee grinders on the market ($19.99), so you can purchase one for every person on your holiday gift list. Unless you have a very long holiday gift list, and no money to spend. In which case, I think you have some other things to figure out before deciding on what kind of coffee grinder to buy. (krups.com)

Holiday Gift Guide: Luggage Tags with Attitude

Wendy Atterberry — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 22:00:00 GMT

As air travel becomes increasingly anxiety-inducing with all those long lines, endless delays, and crabby ticket agents, these luggage tags let passengers express growing rage and frustration with passive-agressive eloquence. Instructing others to keep "hands off my bag," these colorful tags also make ID-ing luggage at baggage claim a lot easier and more fun. A great stocking-stuffer for the frequent traveler on your list. (Wishingfish, $12)

Holiday Gift Guide: Skype Credit

Alex Zalben — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 21:00:00 GMT

Better than a calling card, more useful than a disposable cell phone, Skype Gift Cards are the way to tell your family and friends to ditch that land-line, and start calling you through their computer!

For those of you who haven’t experienced the joy of Skype, it’s approximately six cents a minute for calls anywhere in the United States, and not that much more expensive for international calls. You just plug in a number (there’s an easily savable contact list), call, and you’re good to go. There’s no loss of quality on the calls, you can easily keep track of how much it’s costing right in your Skype calling window, and all you need is a working internet connection.

One of the best features of Skype that I’ve been enjoying lately is conference calling. Yes, yes, I know. I don’t even need to explain why conference calls are fun. But let me explain anyway. Skype sets it up like an IM chat, so you can add (and subtract) callers from the conference as needed. And, as mentioned above, there’s no loss in quality, so unlike most conference calls, which are 20% actual information, and 80%, “I’m sorry, can you repeat that," a Skype conference call is actually just like a regular phone call.

Gift Cards start at $25, or you can pick up a bundle of 10 $5 cards for, you guessed it, $50. It’s probably the only way of non-subtly telling people you want them to call you, and also seeming totally cool for introducing them to emerging technology. (skype.com)