Scanner : kanye west

Kanye and 88 Keys Shill for Viagra in New Video

Colleen Kane — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 16:08:00 GMT

Kanye West and his producer/pal 88 Keys got into oldface for Kanye's "Stay Up (Viagra)" video. It features lyrics like the following: "What she got is so Niagara/ Make a young n---a straight need Viagra/ Make an old n---a give keys to Jaguar/ Just to keep from all the the 'tee-hees' and laughter/ Her telling her homegirls that he couldn't stay up."

Here's the pair on the video set cutting up as dirty old men, which debuts Monday on MTV.

MTV Shows

Kanye West Wants You To Be Like Him, This Apparently Involves Lots of Alcohol

Kanye West's Crazy Sex Addiction is Neither Crazy or an Addiction

Kanye West On SNL: Can't Sing, Won't Sing

Image: MTV

Kanye West's Crazy Sex Addiction is Neither Crazy or an Addiction

Emily Farris — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 17:24:00 GMT

Kanye West is on the cover of the March issue of Details and in typical Kanye West fashion he said lots of really flattering stuff about himself, including but not limited to:

"Put this in the magazine: There's nothing more to be said about music. I'm the f--king end-all, be-all of music.”

"Oh my God, I'm one of the greatest rappers in the world. I'll get on a track and completely ee-nihilate that track, I'll eat it and rip it in half. I wouldn't have to think of it.”

"I have, like, nuclear power, like a superhero, like Cyclops when he puts his glasses on."

But what's the secret behind all of this, uh, success? Why, his sex addiction, of course.

"People ask me a lot about my drive," he says. "I think it comes from, like, having a sexual addiction at a really young age. Look at the drive that people have to get sex—to dress like this and get a haircut and be in the club in the freezing cold at 3 a.m., the places they go to pick up a girl. If you can focus the energy into something valuable, put that into work ethic..."

Ummmmm. Hi, my name is Scanner Emily and I'm a sex addict? (Except without the clubbing.)

[E: Kanye West: Being a Sex Addict Fueled Success]

Related:

Kanye West Wants You To Be Like Him, This Apparently Involves Lots of Alcohol

Kanye West On SNL: Can't Sing, Won't Sing

Kanye Porn Update

Kanye's Got Too Much Booty In The Pants

Sloppy Seconds: Kanye West Dresses Better Than the Gays

Emily Farris — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 00:01:00 GMT

It turns out T.R. Knight isn't the only actor leaving the cast of Grey's Anatomy. Katherine Heigl is on her way out, too. [Defamer]

Rihanna, who was allegedly beat-up by her boyfriend Chris Brown, has been released from the hospital but is postponing a show she's set to play in Malaysia. [Yahoo!]

We're totally onboard for the Michael Phelps backlash-backlash. [Jossip]

Want to know what the hell kind of fertility clinic would inseminate a 33-year-old single mother of six with eight fucking more babies? [SNAFU-ed]

Britney Spears took her assistant back from the Jonas Brothers. Damn straight. [Us]

Media outlets are looking for sugar daddies to get them through the recession. Come to think of it, we wouldn't mind one, either. [DailyIntel]

Guys, Kanye West is just really secure with his manhood, okay? "There's a lot of gay people that I dress way better than." [MTV]

[Image]

Why Did the Grammys Do That to M.I.A.?

Colleen Kane — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 17:21:00 GMT

M.I.A. is the most badass pregnant lady ever for performing at the Grammys on her due date (on top of already being amazingly cool). But can we agree that the so-called "Rap Pack" accompaniment was a bad move? Moments into M.I.A.'s hit "Paper Planes," Kanye West, Jay-Z, Lil Wayne & T.I. joined her on a "Paper Planes"-infused mashup of "Swagga Like Us." Not to give any undeserved credence to YouTube commenters, but one wrote, "love M.I.A., but them blokes ruin that song," and that seems a popular sentiment around the internet this morning.

Here's how it sounded.

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: M.I.A. Is the Most Badass Pregnant Woman on the Planet

Image: NYmag.com

While You Were Sleeping: The 3-D Porn Movie

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 14:08:00 GMT

Ever wonder what repairing a sex doll is like? Wait, you already knew this job existed?

We're hoping Kanye West is kidding when he says he wants to change his name. We are not amused.

Shockingly, your wife may become upset if you turn out to have a secret Playboy subscription.

Try not to panic-- 71,000 jobs were lost yesterday alone.

The hookers are flocking to Florida for the Super Bowl.

Good God! Molly Ringwald is 40 years old. Oh, and she's expecting twins...

The world's first-ever 3D porno flick (or so the producers claim, probably without having done any research) is all set to shoot. We'll, of course, provide a look behind the scenes, assuming this doesn't go way over budget, as an experiment of this magnitude is bound to do.

And forgive Paris Hilton, for she knows not what the hell she's saying.

Kanye Porn Update

Colleen Kane — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 21:40:00 GMT

The Internets were abuzz with news that quoted Kanye West as ready, willing, and able to totally do pornos, even bixesual porn.

False! At least that's what Kanye's saying now....

Kanye writes on his blog:

YOOOO WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!! I HAD THE TWO GREATEST DAYS OF MY LIFE AND WHEN I GET BACK FROM THE LOUIE SHOW I READ SOME SHIT CLAIMING I SAID I'M DOWN TO DO PORN AND SOME BISEXUAL PORN!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THE AVN WOULD POST

This quote didn't get cut off, that's the end of that thought, Kanye then goes on in all caps to talk about various other subjects. I don't know, this so-called authentic Kanye blog seems more dubious to me than the news that he would do porn. Maybe he should let his assistant type out his thoughts.

Oh wait, then he gets back on topic:

PLEASE I BEG YOU, GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME BE GREAT!!! WHO HAVE I HURT SO BAD THAT THEY WANT TO DESTROY ME? WHO HAVE I EVER SPOKE ABOUT SO NEGATIVELY? I JUST WAS SPEAKING WITH OUR NEW PRESIDENT TWO DAYS AGO... AND NOW THIS.... SIDEBAR... NEVER TAKE A PICTURE FROM MY OBAMA PERFORMANCE AND PUT IT NEXT TO A BS QUOTE LIKE THAT! THAT'S IN POOR TASTE! THAT UNDERMINES WHAT MY CONTRIBUTION TO THAT EVENT WAS AND SLAPS EVERYBODY WHO FELT UPLIFTED BY THAT PERFORMANCE IN THE FACE! A PICTURE SAYS A THOUSAND WORDS... LOOK HOW FRESH MY SUIT IS... NUFF SAID!

Nuff said indeed.

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: Zooey Deschanel's Next Record

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 14:16:00 GMT

Lily Allen's bizarre, Amy Winehouse-style rampage continues.

The stars react to their surprise Oscar nominations.

Who do you think said this: "I know people will find that as another thing to hate me on, but fuck it. I'm open to doing porn. Hell, I'll even do bisexual scenes - myself, another man and a woman, or just me and two women. I know people will find that as some weird shit, but I am who I am." The answer? Kanye West.

It's definitely over between Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling, friends. Macadams is now dating Josh Lucas.

Good for Young Jeezy for standing up to Bill O'Reilly: "I felt it was necessary."

Right-wing Democrat Kirsten Gillibrand is likely to be named as Hillary Clinton's replacement in the Senate about the time you read this.

And Zooey Deschanel is working with M. Ward on their followup to She & Him: Volume One. Hopefully, her fiancee, Ben Gibbard, will refrain from droning on in his lyric writing during their rumored collaboration.

What Do Christian Bale And Kermit The Frog Have In Common?

Today's Topless PETA Roundup

While You Were Sleeping: Lily Allen Sends Topless Pic To Wrong Guy

Sloppy Seconds: Kanye Will Pose Nude (Don't Worry, He'll Keep His Sunglasses On)

Emily Farris — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 23:01:00 GMT

Earlier this week Patrick Swayze was telling us he had two to five years to live. Today he was hospitalized for pneumonia. [Yahoo!]

Tom Cruise's Golden Globes date? Katie Holmes' dad. Weird. [Us]

Uh! You guys! This is so not fair! The media is being way nicer to Caroline Kennedy than it was to Sarah Palin. (Don't take it personally Sarah, it's just that everyone in media has been laid off, that's all.) [DailyIntel]

Nerve alum Will Doig rounds up the year in sex. [The Daily Beast]

Ummmmmmmmm.... [People]

"I definitely feel like, in the next however many years, if I work out for two months, that I'll pose naked. I'll break every rule and mentality of hip-hop, of black culture, of American culture," Kanye West told Vibe. We can't say we're not looking forward to that. [MTV]

Everybody Stay Calm and Think Positive Thoughts

Kanye West On SNL: Can't Sing, Won't Sing

[Image]

Kanye's Got Too Much Booty In The Pants

Ina Maier — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 22:12:00 GMT

When it's late in the day and we're exhausted and we're trying our Scanner best to find something to put up, we'll head over to YouTube, or -- if we're feeling especially lazy -- to VideoGum in the hopes of finding a funny video, usually of the cute animal variety. Today was an especially trying day (we've got colds, and coughs, and a mean case of the Tuesdays) and so we said a prayer, opened a new tab, and made our way over to VideoGum. Which is where we found ourselves paralyzed in the midst of our creature quest by a video of Kanye West judging a booty shaking competition.

We didn't mean to press play. And we most definitely didn't mean to watch more than 10, or even 5!, seconds of it. But something about Heartless' eerily synthetic beats serving as a soundtrack to the slowmotion vision of Kanye's current judgee's calisthenic and gluteus gyrations left us oddly hypnotized. Unsettlingly so.

So now you have to watch the whole thing, too.

Video of the Day: Sexting

Kanye West On SNL: Can't Sing, Won't Sing

Ina Maier — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 15:17:00 GMT

So, Kanye was on SNL this past Saturday night and, par for the SNL course, he sounded absolutely terrible.

Was he sick? Was it the curse of SNL's single singer / songwriter-friendly stage that had him sounding like a pitchy version of a drunk robot karaoke night? Or was it just that Kanye flat-out can't sing? We're not sure, but you can watch him unapologetically skip the high-notes in this clip of Saturday's performance.

On another slightly related note, does it bother anyone else that Kanye's recent work has also been a direct rip-off of Daft Punk and, in particular, their 2001 release, Discovery? Why is nobody talking about this? We totally get that artists are mutually inspired and whatnot, but Kanye's production, video, and performance homages just seem a little too in your face and yet somehow totally backhanded. You can check out the video for Kanye's second single, "Heartless" here, and then watch Daft Punk's 2001 video for Digital Love (part of their anime video series which included "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger," -- famously sampled by Kanye on the creatively titled, "Stronger" -- and "One More Time", among others), below.

Notice the sound and visual similarities? Kanye's whole synth-pop schtick, while totally catchy, is starting to drive us insane. But maybe that's just because the majority of our friends didn't seem to realize that "Stronger" was sampling anything at all.

Did no one else spend the majority of their freshman year of college stoned and watching all of all of Daft Punk's illegally-downloaded Discovery videos on repeat? No? No one?

...

OK. Good to know.

Sloppy Seconds: How Kanye West is Handling the Recession

Emily Farris — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:41:00 GMT

The nearly naked girl Michael Phelps has been spotted with his not his girlfriend. Mmmkay? [Us]

Another one (of our potential future husbands) bites the dust. Sam Talbot, ~~winner~~ runner up from Season 2 of Top Chef got married in a secret ceremony last month, further increasing my chances of becoming the Crazy Cat Lady. [People]

If you're selling pictures you took of Amy Winehouse smoking crack, it's possible you were also smoking (or selling) crack and might go to jail. [Radar]

What does Harvey Weinstein have to say about yesterday's Golden Globe nominations? [Vulture]

Just in time for us to go all batshit on it, Facebook is now totally legit! Donald Graham, chairman and chief executive of the Washington Post Co, has agreed to join the board of directors. [Yahoo!]

Kanye West is looking for an internship. No, not an intern, an internship. [FadedYouth]

White House officials turned down Barack Obama's request to move into The Blair House—where incoming presidents usually stay before inauguration—early so that his daughters, Sasha and Malia could start school on time. We hear the Red Roof Inn is really nice, though. [NYT]

[Image]

Sloppy Seconds: The Craigslist Crackdown on Hookers

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 21:53:00 GMT

The awesome sounding Ghostbusters game, featuring the original cast and creators, will be out in 2009, thanks to Atari, who rescued the franchise.

A heartbreaking post from a lesbian mom in California is here. Madonna, meanwhile, attacked Prop 8 in an LA concert and had Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake perform live with her, albeit at separate times.

A male major in the Japanese air force was busted for shopping for women's underwear... while naked.

Kanye West broke his media silence to give an interview in Singapore about what the Beatles mean to him.

Race was not a factor in the election in West Virginia. Take that, Bill Clinton!

Samantha Who star Christina Applegate will undergo reconstructive surgery following her double mastectomy.

Michelle Monaghan gave birth to a wee lil' gal.

And Craigslist will no charge $10 per erotic service ad, in an apparent attempt to crush the human trafficking that's been going on there.

The Giant Penis Is Watching Over You

Sloppy Seconds: The Grey's Anatomy Lesbian Controversy

While You Were Sleeping: The Naked Mannequin Orgy

And You Thought Bill Clinton Was A Sex-Crazed Politician...

Kanye West's Naked Party Might Have Been About a New Album or Something

Nicole Pasulka — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 18:04:00 GMT

Last Tuesday Kanye threw a party featuring 40 naked "performance artists" styled by artist Vanessa Beecroft, and some sort of music. We don't know, all we noticed were afros and boobs.

And that's exactly what you'll see after the jump.

More pics and exposure at Kanye's blog.

Vanessa Beecroft is a performance and installation artist famous for having eating disorders, adopting Sudanese twins, and setting up photo shoots like this one. She and model-hungry Kanye look like a match made in a heaven--if heaven is a giant LA warehouse space filled with reporters and photographers.

Sloppy Seconds: Are Lindsay and Sam Finally, Really Engaged?

Emily Farris — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 21:37:00 GMT

Barack Obama will be back on Saturday Night Live. Dear God, please, please, please let him play Sarah Palin. Nude. [Us]

And apparently now that Obama is involved, SNL is a "cult" Comedy Show. Who knew? [Yahoo!]

It seems that recently-divorced Pink is the latest victim of Scientology. [Yeeeah]

Just one day after Kanye West's outburst with the paparazzi that led to his arrest, he would like you to know he's totes cool with the paps. [People]

How are the McCain's like a drag queen? Why they stuff the "bad" bits (read: adopted Bangladeshi daughter) away. We didn't even know they had an adopted Bangladeshi daughter, did you? [Queerty]

We agree; Us Weekly's list of the top 25 most stylish New Yorkers is whack. [MollyGood]

According to the ever-reputable New York Post, Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson are as good as engaged. We better get an invite. We have a dress we've been dying to wear to a wedding. [NYP]

Sloppy Seconds: Kanye West's Arrest

Emily Farris — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 21:13:00 GMT

Janet Jackson kicked off her first tour in six years with an emotional performance in Vancouver. [People]

We pity the fool who will soon be Mr. Tara Reid. [dListed]

We're not the only ones expecting the new 90210 to suck. Shannen Doherty doesn't plan to do more than four episodes. [Yahoo!]

~~Spiderman~~ Tobey McGuire is all set to give his big speech at the 9/11 memorial service tonight. Huh? [Cryptome]

Project Runway judge and former Elle fashion director, Nina Garcia, has a few things to say about Sarah Palin's wardrobe. For starters, she should drop the glasses. [Radar]

But if you dig her look, you should find your perfect pit bull in lipstick shade. [The Frisky]

Lauren Conrad, of The Hills, has just signed a three-book deal with Harper Collins. We quit. Has she even read three books in her lifetime? [Us]

After smashing up a photographer's camera at LAX, Kanye West realized that TMZ had been taping the first incident and allegedly went after the TMZ camera person. (We probably would have done the same thing). [LAT and TMZ Video]

Kanye West Wants You To Be Like Him, This Apparently Involves Lots of Alcohol

Emily Farris — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 13:20:00 GMT

Unless you have a particularly keen eye and have been thumbing through the "Strictly Personals" section of New York Magazine, you may have missed the print advertisements for Be KANYE, a campaign starring Kanye West and lots of really bad graphics.

The ads are clearly for Absolut Vodka, though the "product" is an Alka-Selzter-like tablet that can instantly transform you into Kanye West.

We're just as confused as you are, but earlier this year, the company announced its "In An Absolut World" campaign, promising to profile Kanye, Eddie Izzard, Perez Hilton and Zach Galifanakis (a strange mix, if you ask us) as "Absolut Visionaries," among less famous subjects, like a random pregnant man. So this must be Kanye's vision.

But if Kanye's vision is really that everyone should want to be like Kanye, doesn't this, um, make him a douchebag?

Here's hoping he's in on the joke and either way, the website is still fun, because of (and in spite of) the fact that it looks like a website would have looked if it were made before websites existed, while offering absolutely no information on what this Be KANYE business is all about.

However, the site counts down to something on July 13, so maybe everything will make more sense then.

In the mean time we highly encourage you to check out bekanyenow.com and call 1-877-Be-KANYE (235-2693 for those of you with phoneputers, you're welcome) if you'd like to become a Kanye groupie. We'll be contemplating our belly buttons and trying to figure out what will happen on the 13th. It better blow our fucking minds!

[BeKANYEnow.com]

(Thanks, Lauren!)

Maybe This is Why Amy Winehouse Hates Kanye West

Emily Farris — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 21:03:00 GMT

Because if this really is how he disposes of his waste, we kind-of hate him a little, too. (We think it's not really his, though.)

[Arktip via Jossip]

Why Does Amy Winehouse Hate Kanye West?

Emily Farris — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 16:32:00 GMT

Amy Winehouse really hates Kanye West. At least enough to call him a "cunt" from stage.

During a recent show, Winehouse apparently made a dig at the rapper at end of her set.

"Are there any black people in the crowd? Let's hear it for Jay-Z. The man has got bollocks to come here, and play the tunes you don't even know you remember. Imagine if it was a cunt like Kanye West. 'Cunts Like Kanye' – that should be his next album title."

Wow, we didn't know men could be cunts.

But Kanye is handling it well. He blogged about it on his own site, saying he's really made it now that Amy Winehouse hates him.

[Kanyeunivercity via Us]

Related:

The Amy Winehouse Condition

Amy Winehouse's Year In Exile

Scanner Peer Mentoring Program: Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse Doesn't Have Anything to Prove to Anyone

Kanye West Expounds on Favorite Subject: Himself

Who Would You Rather?: Kanye West vs. Jay Z

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:33:00 GMT

Both of these dapper gentlemen hip-hop stars were in the news today, one for doing something gentlemanly, the other for merely existing on an iPod.

Who cares why we want to know-- we just do. Who would you rather?

Jay Z was on Barack Obama's iPod and Kanye had to apologize for his seriously-late arrival at Bonnaroo. Oh well-- we forgive Kanye and obviously, being on Obama's iPod elevates Jay in our eyes... but it's up to you to decide.

Sloppy Seconds: Jessica Biel, Britney Spears, Donda West and That Guy You Hate

Emily Farris — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 16:19:00 GMT

Jessica Biel goes blonde. We're scared.

Britney Spears flees for Mexico—we mean goes on vacation—with her paparazzi "friend."

Kanye West's mom, Donda West, apparently died from "some preexisting coronary artery disease and multiple postoperative factors following surgery." Mmmkay.

Do you hate your friend's boyfriend? WebMD is here to help.

Stop the Madness: Kanye West's Mother Dies for No Good Reason

sarahhepola — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 15:41:00 GMT

We suppose it’s possible to make jokes about someone dying. We suppose you could pen some outrageous, flippant punchlines about certain tragedies--a man dying after screwing a horse, perhaps--and because everyone is so damn good at making fun of celebrities these days, we can only assume that someone, somewhere, is making a joke about Kanye West’s mother dying from cosmetic surgery complications. We assume these people are radio DJs and/or Perez Hilton. But we have to tell you something. We don’t think this is funny at all. We think it’s a fucking waste, and we wouldn’t even mention it to tank your otherwise glorious Monday except that it seemed newsworthy, and you (friend) are worthy of news. Also, you should go hug your mom. Or your daughter. Or your favorite rapper. Or this blog. Just, you know, hug something.

Kanye West Expounds on Favorite Subject: Himself

sarahhepola — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 15:30:00 GMT

Kanye West knows Kanye West. He may be the foremost expert in himself. He has what we like to call “a PhD in Me.” And so he is the natural choice to pen a book about Kanye West (though, frankly, we would love to read a book about Kanye West written by Don DeLillo or, shit, Zane). Thank You and You’re Welcome! will be written in collaboration with J. Sakiya Sandifer and will focus on amusing “Kanye-isms,” though we like to think, with such a title, it might also double as an etiquette book. Follow up? Wash Your Hands and Find Your Buddy, Bitches!