Scanner : marisa miller

Memo to the Telegraph: If You Cover Up, You're Not Naked

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 21:50:00 GMT

The above photo of Marisa Miller is advertised as a "nudie pic." We're pretty sure she's actually naked under that iPod (a great Christmas gift, by the way!), but we have to question the supposed nudity in this shot of five young students of Cambridge University...

Okay, sure, they're probably nekkid (although they're all wearing boots and the girl on the far left clearly has shorts or underwear on), but what about the fact that these damn lambs keep getting in the way? They may be naked, but is this technically a "nude photo?"

This was a photo shoot the five Cambridge University gals did for a charity calendar, being sold for nine English pounds (coincidentally their combined body weight), which is for blah blah blah a Veterinary Hospital blah blah.

Photo via the Telegraph.

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While You Were Sleeping: Olympic Mania

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 13:12:00 GMT

The 1982 and 1986 gubernatorial elections in California do not bode well for Obama's candidacy in 2008-- in a roundabout but interesting way. (As you may have heard, the troubled campaign picked Senate lion Joe Biden to do its Vice Presidential politicking.)

Interestingly, half of this country's conservatives think houses of worship should leave politics alone, up 20% from just a few years ago.

Two scary car crashes this weekend involving celebrities: David and Victoria Beckham as well as four members of Helena Bonham Carter's family...

[Bonham Carter's] cousin Fiona Bonham Carter, 51, escaped with a broken shoulder. But Fiona's son Marcus Egerton-Warburton, 14, her mother Brenda, 74, and stepfather Francis Kirkwood, 75, all died. Fiona's sister-in-law Kay Boardman, 54, also perished in the crash...
[David Beckham was] on the way to Nice airport to catch his plane to China, the pair was involved in a horrific crash, which left their black BMW with a smashed windscreen and extensive damage along the passenger side. David Beckham reportedly smashed the car laterally into a wall - leaving his wife severely shaken.

Beckham was photographed embracing a tearful Victoria in the car and comforting her, before he raced to the departure lounge with her father Tony Adams. Beckham was forced to run to catch his flight, leaving his distraught partner with the wrecked car. [via Starpulse]

A man was arrested for crashing the Olympics while wearing a tutu and women's underwear.

The New York Press on gymnasts who didn't make the cut at the Olympic trials: "Instead of going on to win medals, they have to dress up likes fantasy sailors and do a strip tease to earn a few bucks." See what the writer is talking about here.

This woman points out what we've noticed for a long time: female volleyball players play in sexy outfits, but dudes don't have to wear Speedos. Why is that?

We still don't know who Maxim's #1 girl Marisa Miller is, but Victoria's Secret certainly does...

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Another Woman We've Never Heard of Is Maxim's Hottest Woman in The World

Marisa Miller is Sports Illustrated's 2008 Swimsuit Issue Cover Model

Olympian Alain Baxter Trying To Get Himself More, Um, Exposure

Another Woman We've Never Heard of Is Maxim's Hottest Woman in The World

Emily Farris — Wed, 14 May 2008 15:53:00 GMT

A few weeks back, Scanner Brian was perplexed by the fact that FHM had named a woman we'd never heard of as its sexiest woman in the world. This month, Maxim pulls the same trick (even though we have heard of her, but only from one of our own).

And the winner is...

Marisa Miller.

Should we know who she is? Probably. Do we? Only because of Scanner Bryan. Is she the hottest woman in the world? She's definitely hot, but enh.

Scanner Bryan, you're welcome to disagree. So are the folks at Maxim who say she "embodies the official return of the all-American supermodel... Not since Cindy Crawford ruled the catwalk has a pinup born and bred on U.S. soil so thoroughly captured the imagination of the American male."

Also on the list: Scarlett Johansson (No. 2), Jessica Biel (No. 3). And in the top 10: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Elisha Cuthbert, Eva Mendes, Christina Aguilera, Lindsay Lohan (who topped last year's list) and Ashley Tisdale.

How much do you think these women's publicists pay to get them on the list?

No, you know what? Fuck this list. We're taking nominations for Scanner's Hottest Women in the World in the comments section.

[People: Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel Make Maxim's Hot List]

[Image]

Marisa Miller is Sports Illustrated's 2008 Swimsuit Issue Cover Model

Bryan Christian — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 18:01:00 GMT

We've always been kind of fascinated by the SI Swimsuit Issue, but like the Victoria's Secret catalog or Playboy Magazine, we have to confess that as an erotic object we've generally found it a bit lacking. Maybe it's from how we grew up right when porn was starting to be everywhere? Like, it's great and all but... it's just so... nice. Sure, every once in a while they'll get a gal in there whose dewy, volcanic sexuality or inarguably perfect physique make for something truly remarkable -- Josie Maran and Elle MacPherson come to mind in those respective categories. But there's generally a lot of filler, too -- dozens of shots where you can imagine the photographer going "Great, great, now just give me a little giggle," and it comes off like a smutty Applebee's ad or something.

So we're pleased as punch to report that Marisa Miller will, at long last, make her debut as the cover model of this year's edition, following in the sandy footsteps of MacPherson, Heidi Klum, Christie Brinkley, and Cheryl Tiegs. Not only does she wield her implausibly hot body with a welcome bit of sly attitude, but, if you read our Victoria's Secret Fashion Show Wrapup, you'll know that she got her start in Perfect 10 magazine, meaning that as of today she's officially gone all the way from underpaid erotic model to the top of the fucking pops.

Are we tempted to say she's the Jackie Robinson of smut? Absolutely. Will we? No, probably not. Is she even the first model (that we know of) to make such a transition? We don't know; we're not so great with research. But we don't care. Let's just say she is!

So Hooray for Marisa Miller and hooray for us! God bless us, every one!

Sports Illustrated

Outtakes via GoldenFiddle