Scanner : music video

ShamWow-SlapChop Guy Will RapChop That Ass [VIDEO]

Emily Farris — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 21:07:00 GMT

We've never really understood why Vince Shlomi, the ShamWow/SlapChop guy needs that little headset—until now. He wears it so he can rap while he slaps (prostitutes) and wows.

If only all infomercials were this hilarious and culturally relevant... we'd probably have a lot more shit we don't need.

Related:

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Scanner Highs and Lows: That Was Then and This is Now

Matt and Kim Star in the Sexiest Music Video in Years

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 18:14:00 GMT

This video is too sexy and scandalous (even with all the MTV censorship) for the front page of Scanner.

You'll have to trust us when we say it's well worth the click and 3:38 of your time...

Lessons Learned

We'll be eternally grateful to the person who gives us the full lowdown on all the obvious questions of the video-- who shot it, when, were these paid extras, was anyone arrested, etc. See, we told you it was worth your 3:38, damn it.

Sure beats the bejesus outta that Alanis Morissette charmer from 1998, doesn't it?

More from MTV Buzzworthy.

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End a Bad Relationship Today

Emily Farris — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 16:58:00 GMT

We spent the better part of this morning helping a friend compose a break-up script. She was dreading a forced romantic Valentine's Day date with a man she no longer had romantic feelings for and we convinced her it was better to do it before Valentine's Day than after.

Apparently, we're not the only ones who think that way. Reid Mihalko, creator of the famed Cuddle Party, has declared today National End a Bad Relationship Day.

"Let's declare Friday the 13th "National End a Bad Relationship Day!" Let's encourage those of us who feel stuck in the wrong relationship to get unstuck. Let's support our friends who are miserable or on their way towards miserable to make a clean break of it once and for all! If Friday the 13th is already "bad luck day," why not use it to our advantage? Let's use it as leverage for making the hard choices and taking action."

But if you're in a bad relationship and don't have friends like us, Reid is offering a tele-class tonight to get you in the mood to break a heart. Maybe this will help, too:

Related:

Scanner Roundtable: What's Up With All the Spring Break Ups?

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Scanner Emily's Tips for Getting Through Valentine's Day

Holy Hipster Hybrid: Chloe Sevigny in Beck's New Video

Emily Farris — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 18:50:00 GMT

We have a little crush on both Beck (even if he is a Scientologist) and Chloe Sevigny (even if she does play a Mormon), so forgive us if we're just a little too excited about Beck's Gamma Ray Redux video featuring the painted lady.

Beck - Gamma Ray

Scanner Storytime: Betsey Does Bear Bone, And a Vicar, Too

[Image, Image]

Paris Hilton: A Pedophile with a Message

Emily Farris — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 15:02:00 GMT

In our attempt to track down the entire "Paris Hilton for President" video (because we know you're just dying to watch it), we came across Ms. Hilton's official YouTube page. Front and center was a video from 2006 we've never seen, for a song we've never heard.

Anyway, we found this video. And it's so wrong in so many ways. Watch Paris gyrate on a 12-year-old in his bedroom (er, in his dreams?) while she wears only tightie whities and the message "Dare to Dream" flashes across the screen.

Paris Hilton, You and You Alone (and Maybe Nicole Ritchie) Can Stop Puppy Mills

And Your Little Dog, Too: Attack on Paris Hilton's Pups?

Paris Hilton Punks the Paparazzi

Mean Girls: Paris Hilton Calls Former BFF's Ass "Cottage Cheese Inside a Trash Bag"

Caption This: Paris Hilton Visits An Orphanage

Britney Spears Is (Almost) Not Completely Repulsive In Her New Video

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 16:41:00 GMT

Britney Spears has another comeback video for the masses to eat up for two seconds, then dispose of in the nearest receptacle.

Aside from the music, which, like everything the pop star has released, is awful beyond words in our current vocabulary, this is the best MTV video we've seen in years... which, since we haven't seen a video on MTV since 1993, isn't saying much...

Britney Spears - Womanizer (Director Cut)

We kind of like the part where she photocopies her ass (while wearing a skirt? wha?) and then, for no apparent reason, slams that guy's head onto the copier. It gave us a little peek into what likely goes on at Britney Headquarters on a daily basis-- Britney comes in wearing something that would be incredibly desirable on any other woman of the world, then beats the shit out of everyone and shaves herself in appropriate places, like her head or the backseat of a Volkswagen.

P.S. Can anyone explain to us why that cell phone calendar stops on April 20th, of all the dates in the world, the day of the Columbine massacre and Hitler's birthday? Just asking...

Have We Finally Found Stills from the Britney Spears Sex Tape?

Britney Spears Will Open VMA's, We Will Watch With Popcorn and Open Minds

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Video of the Day: Take On Me

Nicole Pasulka — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 19:07:00 GMT

This is the video for "Take On Me," a song we don't normally enjoy much. So why link to the video, then? Because this time, instead of the lyrics, we get a song that narrates exactly what's happening in that sketchy, half-drawn world. Oh, so much more entertaining with its "magic frame" and "pipe wrench guys"

While You Were Sleeping: Kate Moss Doing Nude Orgy For Music Video

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 13:18:00 GMT

The Dalai Lama is too exhausted for a world tour-- even a world tour that involves medical testing.

The first woman to ever face bigamy charges in Kentucky is on the run. Warning: do not marry this crazy nutjob.

Led Zeppelin have returned to the studio! Oh, but there's a small catch...

Jimmy Page, John Paul Jones and Jason Bonham have been working on new material - without frontman Robert Plant.
Drummer Bonham... admits the new songs could be destined for a new Led Zeppelin album...

He says, "At the moment, all I know is I have the great pleasure to go and jam with the two guys and start work on some material. When I get there (in the studio) I never ask any questions..." [Starpulse]

Dr. Dre's son died over the weekend.

Madonna compares McCain to Hitler in her new in-concert video.

The Game stepped up the rap community's attacks on Jesse Jackson.

Yes, you read that headline right: Kate Moss' boyfriend is in a band called We Are (Not) Sex People, known for their terrible name. The lead singer says that Moss will appear, in the buff but filmed discreetly, in the middle of an orgy in a brothel:

Frontman Dan Summers commented: "Jamie [Hince, Moss's boyfriend] has nothing to worry about but there will be lots of nudity.

"Kate will play a sexy, young version of Cynthia [Payne, a famous London madam.] And we’d all give our right ears to be that bunny rabbit she fools around with."

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: More Naughty Miley Cyrus Photos Leaked

Why Did Jesse Jackson Attack Obama?

Sloppy Seconds: Ron Wood's Mistress In The Buff

Fox News Thinks Madonna Broke A-Rod's Rod

Does Madonna Have A Sex Tape And Do We Want To See It?

New Radiohead Video Comes from the Future and Has Lasers

Nicole Pasulka — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 18:29:00 GMT

That's right folks. No cameras, just lasers in this new Radiohead video for "House of Cards." It's like your 5th grade science fair hopes and dreams are coming true right here on YouTube.

Not only are there lasers, but the song's not nearly as annoying to us as other Radiohead songs. The technology used to make the video is called data visualization. Google Code wants to teach us how to make our own video using data visualization. Unfortunately, we want to drink and harass the dog. For those of you with less ambitious plans for the afternoon, check the code and instructions here.

Gorbachov Is Much More Than Just a Man With a Mole

Nicole Pasulka — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 17:49:00 GMT

GORBACHOV: THE MUSIC VIDEO - BIGGER AND RUSSIANER from Tom Stern on Vimeo.

This Russian metal video is about Gorbachov, and the end of Communism, and how sweaty hot women get when they do manual labor. It's also about greenscreen...so much greenscreen.

Video of the Day: Sweet Emotion (From the Vaults)

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 21:37:00 GMT

Scanner Nicole's post today about phone sex operators reminded us of this classic Aerosmith video.

As teenagers, we were mighty turned on by this and began to understand why sex on a telephone could be kind of hot. Not that we've ever called a 900 number... or will ever do so and admit it.

Gay Marriage is So... Gay

Katie Halper — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 19:17:00 GMT

We were so busy (not) celebrating Valentine's Day, that we totally dropped the ball on celebrating last week's Freedom To Marry Week. We could write post after post on why people who want to get married should be allowed to get married (it's their ~~funeral~~ wedding).

But, Mother always said "a funny-moving-gay-marriage-themed music video is worth a thousand words." So without furthur ~~I do~~ ado, here is Julie Goldman's "Commitment Ceremony."