Scanner : naked

Ashley Olsen Takes Off Men's Clothes to Sell Them

Emily Farris — Thu, 14 May 2009 19:13:00 GMT

To promote her own menswear line, Ashley Olsen stripped down to her bra and some trousers for the magazine V Man.

So what kind of clothes does Miss O like on a man?

“To touch a man who has a soft sweater on, a soft pant, a great jacket, or something that, as a woman, I want to take off him and put on and feel sexy in.”

[The Inquisitr: Ashley Olsen Strips to Promote Mens Clothing Line]

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: Which Olsen Twin Would Like You to Put a Baby in Her?

While You Were Sleeping: Which TV Female Character Do You Wanna Be?

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Sloppy Seconds: Vanessa Hudgens is Ready to Get Naked

Emily Farris — Tue, 12 May 2009 22:33:00 GMT

Is it really possible to find an adult friend on AdultFriendFinder.com? [BuzzFeed]

We were just wondering what the hell ever happened to Sinbad. Okay, not really, but if you were... [FlavorWire]

This seemingly drug-induced gibberish is the best recap of last night's Gossip Girl we've read yet. [Gakwer-Defamer]

Hey, remember Eminem? He's trying to help out Detroit's auto industry. [FadedYouth]

Funny Maya Rudolph is knocked up with another probably funny baby. [People]

Katy Perry is thinking of giving it all up to settle down and have babies, but we don't see that happening any time soon (for her or for us). [FameCrawler]

High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens on getting naked: "Right now, I would feel comfortable doing it, but, like I said, when the time's right, if it's an amazing movie that I'm really passionate about and that's what it calls for, then we'll see," she continued. [Us]

Jennifer Aniston Can't Stop Getting Naked

Emily Farris — Wed, 06 May 2009 19:39:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: It's true, Jennifer Aniston has had a difficult couple of years in the press, who, for whatever reason, can't seem to stop telling everyone about the many ways in which she's lonely and desperate to have a baby. But, as the saying goes, when life sends you lemons, make lemonade -- or take every opportunity to get naked and show everyone how smoking hot you are. In doing so, not only will you heap burning coals (fueled by the fires of your hotness) on the heads of your critics, but it's also more badass and artful than wearing a sign that says, "Desperate this."

Case in point: J. Aniston's revealing new photo shoot for Smart Water...

Read more...

Heidi Montag Nude In Playboy?

Emily Farris — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 19:02:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Word is she and Spencer are in negotiations with Hef...

Read more...

Double Your Pleasure

Emily Farris — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:19:00 GMT

VIA THE MODERN MATERIALIST: What is it about retro lithographs that hits on our collective sense of national nostalgia? Actually, that's probably exactly what it is, but regardless, they're just... Cool. And these very, very NSFW retro pin-ups by Mel Ramos are a perfect example of this:

Read more...

Sloppy Seconds: Parker Posey's New Man

Emily Farris — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 21:28:00 GMT

Did you catch Tracy Morgan shirtless in real life on 30 Rock last night? [Defamer]

Britan's Got Talent singing phenomenon Susan Boyle got a little makeover. [Yahoo!]

One thing we would not like to find on our doorstep? A flaming bag of poo. Another thing we would not like to find on our doorstep? A live shark. [CBS13]

A sequel to Clueless!? Count us in! Well, as long as his you know what isn't crooked. [BuzzSugar]

We hate to admit we're also pretty excited about the prospect of Chace Crawford taking on Kevin Bacon's role in the remake of Footloose. [Us]

If Parker Posey was dating Keanu Reaves, that seems to be over, because now she's being spotted around town with graphic designer and sculptor Scott Lenhardt. We endorse this because 1) Keanu Reeves doesn't seem so smart and 2) artist boys are totally hot. [DailyIntel]

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Sloppy Seconds: Crazy Baby Lady Makes it Work

Emily Farris — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 23:14:00 GMT

Last week, while we were taking the dog out for a poo, a man standing in the driveway of the apartment building next door said "Can I have your number?" There was no "Hi, my name is...." There wasn't even a "Hi." We wondered in what world he thinks he can approach women like that and actually get the response he wants. Instead of giving him that speech, we just said "no," gave him a disgusted look and gushed over our poopy puppy. Apparently we weren't the only ones wondering what these men are thinking. As the ladies at Jezebel asked, after a New York Times article on talking to boys about sex, how do you keep boys from becoming [::sigh::] "that creepy guy on Nerve?" [Jezebel]

Speaking of dog poo, we're glad we don't have a microphone held up to our dog's ass every time we take him out. Poor Sasha Obama. [Twitpic]

We could listen to Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen and that guy from the BBC read from Harlequin romance novels all day. Especially when Rogen still has a few extra pounds on him. [Videogum]

What can the Kansas City Police Department do to cut costs during these hard economic times? How, how about just eliminating benefits for same-sex couples? That's cool with everybody, right? [Plog]

Jennifer Love Hewitt did what any respectable starlet should do after a break-up: she got half-naked for Maxim. [People]

A fleet (a battalion?) of dolphins has joined the anti-pirate crusade. [DailyIntel]

At long last: Crazy Baby Lady Nadya Suleman has all fourteen of her children at home. [Us]

While You Were Sleeping: Lara Flynn Boyle Still Getting Naked

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 13:14:00 GMT

Phil Spector was finally convicted of second-degree murder. Bye bye, psycho.

Al Franken has been declared the winner of the Minnesota Senate race... again. And it's not over yet... although it's been over for months, of course.

A study shows that Facebook users have lower GPA's than non-Facebookers.

We're a bit out of this morning: did we tell you about the eight-year-old who couldn't get her marriage to a middle-aged man annulled in the great nation of Saudi Arabia? If not, you really need to read this.

Lara Flynn Boyle's still getting naked, but this time it's for a TV show.

The Neverland sale is going ahead as planned-- we hope they burn that whole sickening place to the ground on the way out.

After the Tweenbots thing yesterday, we were thinking New Yorkers were getting better at being aware and helpful. Not so much.

Want to get an iPhone but don't want to deal with AT&T's shitty plans?

Our Weekend Gift to You: Blood Alcohol Calculator

While You Were Sleeping: Foxy Brown Joins The Nipple Slip Parade

Twitter Goes to the Next Level: Flutter (Video)

Mad Men's January Jones Is The Hottest Housewife On TV

Emily Farris — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 16:07:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Wipe your mouths and close your office doors. There are more pictures inside...

Ms. Jones is on the cover of GQ UK Magazine for the month of May. She's seen here in a black corset and what Carrie Bradshaw would call the "naked dress."

Read more...

At Least Amy Winehouse Has Good Taste in Underwear

Emily Farris — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 15:58:00 GMT

With everything going on in Amy Winehouse's life these days, it's good to know she still has the wherewithal to put on cute—and seemingly clean—panties. She would like you to know, er see, this.

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: Blake Fielder-Civil's 16-Year-Old Girlfriend?

Sloppy Seconds: Amy Winehouse's New Single Life

Amy Winehouse Gets Naked. For a Good Cause. For Real.

Really? "Sleeping?"

[Image]

Way to F Up the Swingers Party, Dude

Colleen Kane — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 18:37:00 GMT

A tourist caused a mini riot at an "anything goes" adult sex party at an Australian nudist colony.

So how does one cause such outrage, if anything goes at this party...?

By refusing to get naked.

The monthly sex party was promoted to boost weak tourism to a resort that was once named the country's top group-sex hotspot for naked swingers.

Four naked women, uncomfortable with the way he was "eyeing them off," confronted the clothed man and demanded he drop trou, said the manager, Tony Fox.

"He then threatened to bash me, there was some argy-bargy and I ordered him off the premises and police were called."

Argy-bargy. Best new phrase of the day.

Related:

Swingers Vs. Nudists In Florida (Of Course)

Top 10 Secrets For Looking Great Naked... From A Nudist Resort

Vintage Finds: Nudism Throughout the World from 'Sexology' Magazine

Who Would You Rather: This Week's Newsmaking Naked Mens

Colleen Kane — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 20:25:00 GMT

Many of you have by now seen the "naked" Vanity Fair shoot by Annie Liebowitz, featuring the men they're calling Comedy's New Legends: Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen, Jason Segel, and Jonah Hill. What with the hairless nude suits, the pudge, and the lack of genitalia, they're oddly cherubic.

But have you seen the honest-to-God, bare-ass naked guy who spent most of Sunday on the cross on top of a church?

Sacreligious and probably crazy, but dude is in shape. The full monty shots (forbidden on this blog), can be seen here.

This man climbed to the top of the cross in Los Angeles, who was up there for almost seven hours, creating a huge scene: disrupting traffic while threatening to jump, and smearing feces on the cross. Firemen and police inflated an air cushion in case he jumped, but the man eventually climbed down on his own accord. According to news reports, he's probably being evaluated at a psychiatric hospital right now.

Related:

Who Would You Rather: Seth Rogen vs. Seth Rogen?

Seth Rogen Dipped His Toes in the Sea of Porn, Decided to Go For a Swim

'Playboy' Picks Its Ninth Play Boy

The Time Elvis Serenaded a Naked Tom Jones

Colleen Kane — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 17:10:00 GMT

This is some amazing breaking news right here. Tom Jones has informed the world (via The Sun) that Elvis Presley once serenaded him while he was in the shower. Here's how that bananas scenario came to be.

Elvis came to Vegas to see Tom Jones perform, and as the hirsute Welshman lathered up in the shower, Elvis couldn't wait to sing him a little tune.

"When I opened my eyes he was leaning over the door singing to me. I didn’t have any clothes on. I think he was checking me out."

I am sad posting this, as it will probably be a very long time before another anecdote this awesome comes along.

Related:

Tom Jones' Wife is Rich But Rather Tragic

Tom Jones Insures His Chest Hair for $7M

Cute Overload Keeps the Pets in Costumes Coming

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Sloppy Seconds: RNC Chair Tells Critics to "Stuff It"

Emily Farris — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 23:44:00 GMT

We stopped liking theater pretty much after we had that terrible drama mask tattoo covered with something else, but we're intrigued by "In the Next Room (Or the Vibrator Play." [NYT]

Robert De Niro and Van Morrison will be among Jimmy Fallon's first guests when he takes over "Late Night." [Yahoo!]

Lisa Rinna made a point of not hitting the gym before her Playboy shoot. [People]

Just as Richard Simmons offers Jessica Simpson weight loss advice. [Us]

There are very few things that make us miss living in New York, but this Snuggie pub crawl is one of them. [Snuggie Pub Crawl]

Michael Steele, chair of the RNC says he's taking the Republican Party beyond the cutting edge, so far beyond in fact, that it will be "off the hook." If you don't like it? "Stuff it." [CNN]

Sloppy Seconds: Crazy Baby Lady Has One Less Mouth to Feed

Emily Farris — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:17:00 GMT

Now we officially want to punch the economy in the vagina (sorry, the vulva). Beloved Chicago label Touch and Go Records is shutting down distribution. [Pitchfork]

Even Madonna is co-opting vampire culture. Apparently she wants a role in New Moon, the sequel to Twilight. [AfterEllen]

Taylor Swift would like you to not picture her naked. And we would like you to not think about a neon-green dildo. [Us]

Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen are engaged. We were unaware they were dating. [People]

All you men who don't understand why average women are so insecure about our looks: even Dita Von Teese has self-esteem issues. Thank you, society. (It should be noted that moments before we saw this item we were thinking about how terribly beady our eyes looked without eye make-up). [FadedYouth]

Roman Polanski is not off the hook yet. A judge in Los Angeles refused to dismiss the 31-year-old sex case against the director because he's a fugitive. This, Mr. Polanski, is what you get for running away from your problems. But, the judge said he might reconsider if Runaway Roman returns to the US. We suspect this might be a trick. [Yahoo!]

The Crazy Baby Lady, otherwise known as Nadya Suleman, has lost her publicist. The Killeen Furtney Group was representing Suleman for free, but decided to quit after receiving death threats via email and voicemail. [Snafu-ed]

Related:

Wannabe Vampires Are Totally Pissing Off Real Vampires

From the Archives: 10 Reasons the Recession Will Rock Your Love Life

Crazy Baby Lady Skips Welfare, Goes Straight to TV

People are Talking About Beth Ditto's Nude Magazine Shoot

Colleen Kane — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 18:48:00 GMT

Beth Ditto, singer of the Gossip, just became more badass by baring her ass for the cover of LOVE magazine.

It's not the first time-- she's also appeared nude on the cover of NME, who she told women weren't to blame for the size 0 ideal.

"Blame gay men who work in the fashion industry who want these women as dolls. Men don't know what it feels like to be a woman and be expected to look a particular way. The Beckhams are part of the machine; Paris Hilton is part of the machine."

Beth has stripped for On Our Backs as well. A post about this on Perez Hilton inspired 533 comments so far that we shan't read, presumably many of them pejorative and semi-literate, and 270 on Popeater.
Thoughts?

Related:

Top 10 Hottest Women Size 10 and Up

Hot or Not?

We Feel a Little Better About the Three Fried Dough Balls We Ate at Dinner

Sloppy Seconds: What Amy Adams Does in Private

Emily Farris — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 22:43:00 GMT

Do you believe that NBC paid crazy baby lady ~~Angelina Jolie~~ Nadya Suleman nothing for her sit down with Ann Curry? [Jossip]

Our favorite headline of the day: 'Nude biker leads trooper on chase in bad weather.' [AP]

Boo: a brewery in Brooklyn has been ordered to stop making its Obama ale. That's too bad. We've had it and it's good. [The Brooklyn Paper]

After seemingly racist photos of her surfaced, Miley Cyrus is being sued for $4 million "on behalf of all "Asian Pacific Islanders living in Los Angeles County." Good luck with that Lucie Kim. [FadedYouth]

Ah! Will U2 just go away for, like, a little while? They're playing for an entire week on David Letterman to promote their upcoming album. [Yahoo!]

Apparently Amy Adams, girl of Scanner Brain's dreams, is actually a bad girl, telling BlackBook magazine, "I misbehave. I just do it in private." We imagine this only means he loves her more now. [People]

Sloppy Seconds: Why Sam Won't Leave Lindsay

Emily Farris — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 23:47:00 GMT

We refused to read "Eat, Pray, Love" but that doesn't mean we won't see the movie. Julia Roberts is set to play the memoirist/author Elizabeth Gilbert. [Reuters]

An arrest warrant has been issued for Joe "Boobies" Francis and he faces up to 10 years in prison if convicted on charges of tax evasion. Which reminds us, we need to get our taxes done so we can afford to keep our meager boobies safe from Francis. [Yahoo!]

Is naked Obama riding a unicorn officially a meme? [Jossip]

We're not really fans of fake retro anything. But Shaun of the Dead is one of our favorite movies, so we're really excited about this 1960's paperback book cover artwork. It's sort of reverse adaptation. [LaughingSquid]

Staten Island's groundhog, Charles G. Hogg (known by locals as Staten Island Chuck) bit Mayor Bloomberg at a press conference today. We bet that's the last time Bloomie gets on a Ferry. [Star Gazette]

Are we the only ones who don't find the MacGruber SNL skits funny? [Vulture]

Unless you're really cool (we're not) you probably didn't know who Sam Ronson was before she started dating Lindsay Lohan. And according to FOXNews's ever-reliable sources, that's exactly why Sam would never leave LiLo. [FOXNews]

Sloppy Seconds: Kelis to Serve Up a Different Kind of Milkshake

Emily Farris — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 00:22:00 GMT

Yesterday, two birds took down a Kansas City man's ice cream. Today, an entire plane full of people, right into the Hudson River. [BBC]

A 19-year-old Wisconsin woman is facing charges after she got drunk and ran pantsless through an IHOP. Good thing there were never cops around all the times we ran half naked through fast food chains. [The Smoking Gun]

A man in Atlantic City is facing charges after he posed as a female veterinarian and doing all the things veterinarians do, except, we hope, fixing cats and dogs and other furries. [Press of Atlantic City]

And dumbass Johnny Knoxville is facing charges for allegedly taking a grenade into LAX. WTF, Johnny? [Yahoo!]

How excited are we for the "Gossip Girl" spin-off that will tell the story of Lily and Rufus? Very. Very excited. Srsly. XOXO. [Us]

Rappers Kelis and Nas are reportedly expexcting their first child. [MTV]

Related:

Why You Should Never Deny a Kansas City Man His Ice Cream (Hint: You Will End Up Dead)

Photos: Nude Animal Rights Protesters from Spain (Who Don't Seem to Be Making a Difference)

Scanner Matt — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 16:50:00 GMT

Now we're all for loving animals (just look at Scanner Verena's dog and elephant BFF post below) and we're all for stylish public displays of nudity, but we don't think anyone's going to stop the circus ("No Mas Circos Con Animales") like this.

Thundercats!

We actually came across our old Le Tigre t-shirt the other day.

Not sure what animals these people are supposed to be... (probably bulls, but no horns?)

Drama!

Italians!

And then there's the previously posted naked caged animal protesters of Louisiana if you're still not convinced the circus is evil.

Related:

Caged Heat: PETA Takes Topless Roadshow To Louisiana

Best Naked Music Video of the Year

High Class College Hooker: No One Understands Me

Never Pay for Porn Again

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Sloppy Seconds: How Kanye West is Handling the Recession

Emily Farris — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:41:00 GMT

The nearly naked girl Michael Phelps has been spotted with his not his girlfriend. Mmmkay? [Us]

Another one (of our potential future husbands) bites the dust. Sam Talbot, ~~winner~~ runner up from Season 2 of Top Chef got married in a secret ceremony last month, further increasing my chances of becoming the Crazy Cat Lady. [People]

If you're selling pictures you took of Amy Winehouse smoking crack, it's possible you were also smoking (or selling) crack and might go to jail. [Radar]

What does Harvey Weinstein have to say about yesterday's Golden Globe nominations? [Vulture]

Just in time for us to go all batshit on it, Facebook is now totally legit! Donald Graham, chairman and chief executive of the Washington Post Co, has agreed to join the board of directors. [Yahoo!]

Kanye West is looking for an internship. No, not an intern, an internship. [FadedYouth]

White House officials turned down Barack Obama's request to move into The Blair House—where incoming presidents usually stay before inauguration—early so that his daughters, Sasha and Malia could start school on time. We hear the Red Roof Inn is really nice, though. [NYT]

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More Pictures Released from Jennifer Aniston's Naked 'GQ' Spread

Emily Farris — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 15:45:00 GMT

If Jennifer Aniston's naked GQ cover wasn't enough for you yesterday, more pictures from the January issue have been released. We have them after the jump for your viewing pleasure... and the resolution is ~~much~~ a little better.

Related:

Jennifer Aniston Does GQ...Naked

Who Would You Rather: Jennifer Aniston vs. Jennifer Connelly

While You Were Sleeping: Jennifer Aniston's Big News

Who Is Jennifer Aniston Doing Hot Sweaty Hand Holding With These Days?

Never Pay for Porn Again

Scanner Matt — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 22:34:00 GMT

Free pornography? You don't know about this yet? We could have sworn we told you.

Is this a sign of an enlightened society or the downfall of society? The people have taken porn into their own hands and it's been killing the adult-entertainment industry along with some other things.

The story from Conde Nast Portfolio:

DVD sales are in free fall. Audiences are flocking to pornographic knockoffs of YouTube, especially a secretive site called YouPorn. And the amateurs are taking over. What’s happening to the adult-entertainment industry is exactly what’s happening to its Hollywood counterpart—only worse.

There are just too many theories to add to that comparative statement.

As its name suggests, YouPorn lets users upload and watch a virtually unlimited selection of hardcore sex videos for free. The user-generated clips on YouPorn—like those on YouTube, the site it mimics—range from the grainiest amateur footage to the slickest professional product.

Good luck.

Related:

Today in WTF: PG Porn

Porn Poll: How Do You Like Your Porn?

Porn and Pasties: We Missed Out

Jennifer Aniston Does GQ...Naked

Emily Farris — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 18:14:00 GMT

We got strangely and uncharacteristically uncomfortable when we saw Jennifer Aniston naked on the cover of the January GQ (which hits stands December 23). Perhaps you'll have a different reaction?

It's just that she looks so damn good.

Take that, Brangelina!

In addition to looking amazing, she has a few things to say.

On why she thinks people are still interested in her split with Brad, four years after the fact: “Jokingly: The funny thing is that people don’t realize we all go away to the Hamptons on the weekends… No. But can you imagine? That’d be hysterical: I’ve got Zahara on my hip, and Knox…”

On her current relationship with Brad: “We don’t not talk. When there’s something to congratulate or celebrate, there’s always an exchange. But there’s no charge on it.”

On her on-again, off-again boyfriend John Mayer: “Honestly, did not know much about him before I met him. I’d heard … you know, uh ‘Your Body’ – that song. But what I can say is that I had no idea what an extraordinary musician he is. And it’s just great to sit and be witness t that. It’s kind of like, Whoa!”

On the rumors surrounding Jen and John: “I am not having his baby. And I have not popped the question.”

Clearly, she is not pregnant.

We look forward to seeing this in hires.

While You Were Sleeping: Jennifer Aniston's Big News

Who Is Jennifer Aniston Doing Hot Sweaty Hand Holding With These Days?

[Image, Image]

The Results Are Not In... For This "Who Would You Rather?"

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 21:56:00 GMT

A couple weeks ago, we gave you a Who Would You Rather: Stacey Dash vs. Rachelle Leah: Playboy Edition. For the first time in the history of humanity, the results were tied at 44% (12% voted for a tie, but that's a copout.)

We won't let this die... see more evidence, after the jump...

Stacey Dash

Rachelle Leah

To vote (and enjoy more photographic comparisons, nsfw), click here.

Related:

Who Would You Rather? Rachelle Leah vs. Stacey Dash Playboy Spreads

Some of the Hottest Women in the Country All Got Naked Together

Gisele Bundchen Finds Another Excuse To Take Off Her Clothes

Kate Winslet Takes it Off for Vanity Fair

Olga Kurylenko: "My Treasure Trove of Topless Photos Don't Count As Porn"

What's It Like Having Strangers Eat Off Your Naked Body?

10-Year-Old Boy Is the Lone Protester of Nude Sunbathing

Sloppy Seconds: The Grey's Anatomy Lesbian Controversy

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 21:31:00 GMT

We're wrapping up early today so we can stay glued to the TV. Check out our election thread here.

The Examiner examined the worst celebrity magazine covers of all time. Guess how many are David Duchovny photos?

Another naked prank went wrong.

How the hell did this end up in a kid's Halloween candy bag?

When their children returned from Halloween trick-or-treating, a couple found suspected methamphetamine and $85 in cash among their 7-year-old son's Snickers bars and Skittles. Lars and Shelly Brosdahl called police, who confirmed that the substance was methamphetamine, worth up to $200 on the street. [AP/Yahoo]

An enraged husband and his two brothers got a drunk and cut off his dick as revenge for a supposed sex act committed with the enraged man's wife.

A man who raped a horse got off easy. (No pun intended, please!)

Brooke Smith's role as Dr. Erica Hahn on Grey's Anatomy is over. Do you think it's discrimination? The argument didn't convince us either way.

And the Kate Winslet-Vanity Fair photos Scanner Emily posted yesterday are causing the predictable controvsery. Airbrushed? Photoshopped? Who cares?

Related:

Kate Winslet Takes it Off for Vanity Fair

Woman Kills Rapist With Shotgun Blast Through Her Front Door

While You Were Sleeping: The Naked Mannequin Orgy

Gisele Bundchen Finds Another Excuse To Take Off Her Clothes

20-Year-Old Teacher Strips For Her Students... On Video

And You Thought Bill Clinton Was A Sex-Crazed Politician...

Britney Spears Is (Almost) Not Completely Repulsive In Her New Video

While You Were Sleeping: The Naked Mannequin Orgy

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 14:31:00 GMT

You'll be relieved to learn that this post has nothing to do with the you-know-what that's happening today...

This is the creepiest and coolest Halloween prank we've seen this year

A woman is charged with murder after stabbing her boyfriend with a pair of scissors after the argued over a slice of pizza.

It's scary and insane enough that this guy murdered his girlfriend. But then to cut off his own dick and leave it with her body? Wow. We have nothing to say about that.

A man is selling his wife through an in a classified section intended for vehicle sales, complete with the usual punny ad. The news here? Even though she's 25, he has had to drastically reduce the asking price.

A supposed burglar was found in a store's window display bed getting it on... with a bunch of mannequins.

A naked, masked man holding a gun and waving the American flag on an overpass caused a California freeway to be shut down for hours during yesterday morning's rush hour. And how come we're hearing about this the next day?!

And Traci Lords doesn't appear naked in Kevin Smith's new Porno movie because she was lactating. Yeah, we figured Smith would take a pass on that...

Related:

Today It's Porn Vs. Halloween For Kevin Smith

And You Thought Bill Clinton Was A Sex-Crazed Politician...

The World's Largest Flower Is A Giant Deformed Penis

Reversing That Circumcision Even Scarier Than You Thought

Swedish Hockey Fans Bombard Player With Dildo Parade

Kate Winslet Takes it Off for Vanity Fair

Emily Farris — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 16:33:00 GMT

We're still traveling but we can't wait to get home to our copy of "Vanity Fair." The lovely Kate Winslet is the cover subject, and though we think she's looking a little too thin for Kate Winslet (airbrushing?), she looks amazing. But, of course, Kate always looks beautiful—even if she's just out and about in a t-shirt and jeans. But, yeah, the naked pin-up look is good for her, too.

However, does anyone else think she looks a more like Angelina Jolie than Catherine Deneuve in the cover shot?

Related:

Top 5 Kate Winslet Sex Scenes

Sloppy Seconds: More Naughty Miley Cyrus Photos Leaked

Top 5 Sex Scenes From "Chick Flicks"

Top 5 Sex Scenes Involving Food

[Vanity Fair via Faded Youth]

While You Were Sleeping: Drunk Cheerleaders Make Sports Watchable Again

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 13:51:00 GMT

Colin Powell endorsed Barack Obama on Meet the Press. He pointed out the Senator is and has always been a Christian... and so what if he was a Muslim?

A gym teacher posed as a lesbian model to try to get his student to send him a nude self-portrait.

Jon Stewart has only one thing to say to Sarah Palin... and he can't say it on TV...

That's right... he tells Sarah Palin: "Fuck you." The full transcript of this almost completely garbled video is here.

Guess how much a tennis lesson with Andy Roddick costs? A million bucks, right? That's what you'd think, but not only is it a mere 15 g's, Roddick is throwing in a nudity option as well.

You know how much we love pranks.

The shortlist for the Oscars' Best Foreign Language Film nominees was announced, although we don't think many of them will see release in the U.S. for a while.

A man was charged with taking a leak in a police car and spitting on a cop. The man was, of course, butt naked at the time.

And a bunch of cheerleaders were busted for hitting the bottle before The Big Game. Wait, some teenagers aren't drunk the night before a big game? That's not the America we know and love...

Woman Steals Daughter's Identity to Become a High School Cheerleader

"Do That Little Cheerleader Move," NY State Assemblyman Tells Intern

Town Rallies Behind Principal Who Discriminated Against Lesbian Student

Who Would You Rather: Grey's Anatomy Lesbian Doctor Edition

While You Were Sleeping: The Madonna Marriage Meltdown

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 14:47:00 GMT

If you're a passenger on a plane that's being hijacked, you may do well to follow the example set by these passengers.

The sleazy Republican Governor of Nevada has been slapped with a lawsuit by the cocktail waitress who suffered his "advances" two years ago. Meanwhile, a right-wing politician in Austria, killed in a car accident last weekend, is believed to have been driving drunk at the time.

Are you interested in seeing Naomi Cambell naked?

Then click here. We've had enough of her, clothed or naked, with all the violent rampages and the rest of her insanity.

Did Dennis Leary go too far when he attacked parents of kids diagnosed with autism?

The blogs love the new Apple laptops.

We're sad to see Terrence Howard had to quit Iron Man 2 over a salary dispute, but at least he was replaced by someone equally excellent (Don Cheadle.)

MTV and the UK Sun are reporting:

Just months after Madonna denied that her marriage was in trouble, a British tabloid is reporting that she and husband Guy Ritchie are set to announce their split, "imminently."
The Sun reported on Wednesday (October 15) that a "highly placed source" confirmed that Madonna, 50, and Ritchie, 40, "just couldn't live together any more" and could "no longer bear to live with the pretence" of being a happily married couple. [MTV]

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