Scanner : the white house

American Woman: The Presidential Mistress

Emily Farris — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 14:54:00 GMT

When you think of presidential mistresses do you imagine Monica Lewinsky and her blue dress making nightly appearances on Inside Edition? Or maybe you picture Marilyn Monroe baring all for photographer Bruce Stern in The Last Sitting. In fact, save for America’s bittersweet love for Ms. Monroe, presidential girlfriends are rarely presented in a positive light. Until now.

British painter Annie Kevans has captured every presidential mistress—and one mister—on record in her oil-on-paper series All the Presidents’ Girls.
JFK's conquests make up more than a third of the collection, but they share the spotlight with the likes of Jefferson’s slave girl Sally Hemings, Monica Lewinsky and William Rufus DeVane King—who was elected Vice President under Franklin Pierce and was rumored to have been James Buchanan’s undercover lover.

Kevans recently closed a three-day gallery show in New York but the entire series can be viewed online.

Related:

Mistress Contest Goes Horribly Wrong

Sloppy Seconds: Ron Wood's Mistress In The Buff

It Never Ends: Giuliani Billed NYC Taxpayers To Bang His Mistress/Future-Wife

Sloppy Seconds: How Kanye West is Handling the Recession

Emily Farris — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:41:00 GMT

The nearly naked girl Michael Phelps has been spotted with his not his girlfriend. Mmmkay? [Us]

Another one (of our potential future husbands) bites the dust. Sam Talbot, ~~winner~~ runner up from Season 2 of Top Chef got married in a secret ceremony last month, further increasing my chances of becoming the Crazy Cat Lady. [People]

If you're selling pictures you took of Amy Winehouse smoking crack, it's possible you were also smoking (or selling) crack and might go to jail. [Radar]

What does Harvey Weinstein have to say about yesterday's Golden Globe nominations? [Vulture]

Just in time for us to go all batshit on it, Facebook is now totally legit! Donald Graham, chairman and chief executive of the Washington Post Co, has agreed to join the board of directors. [Yahoo!]

Kanye West is looking for an internship. No, not an intern, an internship. [FadedYouth]

White House officials turned down Barack Obama's request to move into The Blair House—where incoming presidents usually stay before inauguration—early so that his daughters, Sasha and Malia could start school on time. We hear the Red Roof Inn is really nice, though. [NYT]

[Image]

While You Were Sleeping: Ashley Alexandra Dupre Finally Talked

Emily Farris — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 16:03:00 GMT

We haven't been watching this season of Dancing With the Stars but we have been watching clips of Cloris Leachman and her cleavage online and we're sad to say she's not one of the top three contestants on the show. [Yahoo!]

Stem-cell surgery: coming to a human organ near you. [NYT]

Malia and Sasha Obama got their first tour of the White House yesterday. They were invited by Laura Bush to check out their new rooms. [Us]

In her first interview since she was found to be pleasuring former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer for money, Ashley Alexandra Dupre spoke with People. What would she like you to know? That she's a normal girl. [People]

Scanner Nicole, who already knew this, will be watching Diane Sawyer interview Dupre Friday night on 20/20. Expect a full report. [Daily News]

Life with the Obamas... in the White House

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 14:06:00 GMT

Leave it to a British newspaper to give us the lowdown on what life will be like for our next first family...

Plus: the best story about Vice Presidential sex we've ever heard...

The Mirror, England's splashiest tabloid, had a great piece yesterday detailing the family lives of previous U.S. Presidents and how the Obamas would compare. Among the more memorable speculations and revelations:

1) Obama will get rid of Nixon's famous bowling alley (which, we should add, was actually built as a gift to Harry Truman, who rarely used it) and install a basketball court, where he hopes to take on pro ballplayers.

2) Here's one we hadn't heard: at meals outside of the White House, Secret Service agents will take drinking glasses (and possibly dishes and utensils) from the President after he's done with them and destroy them elsewhere.

3) The President and his family are billed for their own meals and dry cleaning, a fact Nancy Reagan found out after a full month into her husband's administration.

4) Obama will not be allowed, at least by the Secret Service, to bicycle around D.C., which he enjoys doing, and will have to stick to shooting hoops, playing pool, or working out in the exercise room.

5) Sasha and Malia may attend the same private school Chelsea Clinton did and bring slumber parties to the White House.

6) Best of all, Obama and Mrs. Obama will have distress signaling systems.

Obama will be given a set of panic buttons: One for his pocket, one on his desk and one beside his bed. They are credit card-shaped and simply have to be squeezed to summon a posse of agents.

At one time, the President and Vice-President were given three-inch-high models of the Washington Monument to put beside their beds. They had simply to knock them over to summon the guards.

But the models were abandoned after Vice-President Dan Quayle - noted for being clumsy - knocked his over late one night while making love to his wife.

In seconds, the door burst open, the lights went on and Mrs Quayle was thrown out of bed to the floor as bodyguards flocked around her husband to ensure his safety.

7. And, according to People Magazine:

Besides the all-weather tennis court on the South Lawn and the grand piano on the second floor, [Sasha and Malia] will have their own pastry shop, swimming pool, bowling alley and movie theater – complete with a popcorn cart.

The White House also comes with a staff of ushers and pastry chefs to ensure birthday parties will never be the same. They plan slumber parties and scavenger hunts that no Supermom can hope to rival.

More via the Mirror.

Related:

Get Your Muslim On

The Election Is Over... And Now The Truth Comes Out

What Do You Do When a Black Man is Elected President?

And You Thought Bill Clinton Was A Sex-Crazed Politician...

Playboy's Presidential Sex Quiz A Welcome Distraction From Boring Obama Stories

McCain Sabotages His Own Attempt To Save The Nation

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 13:44:00 GMT

It's time someone called "nuts!" on this McCain campaign suspension, fake attempt to save the economy, and the sabotaging of that fake attempt once it appeared Obama had the upper hand on the issue again...

Here's what we've heard. It's possible, of course, that Politico, Politics1, RCP, and all the other sources are wrong, but let's assume otherwise for the moment:

1) McCain told David Letterman he couldn't do anymore interviews because he was rushing back to DC to work on legislation. This was proven, on air, to be a lie, as McCain ran over to do an interview with Katie Couric instead. Fine, whatever. But why then did McCain wait until the morning to fly to DC? Didn't he know that would be a big red flag for people?

2) McCain said he was going to suspend campaigning. But we've heard from several sources that his ads are still running, his workers are still working, and McCain is still "campaigning" in every sense of the term except for actual stump speeches. See more about what his campaign has been up to since the suspension here.

3) Politico and Politics1 report on how the deal fell apart, thanks to McCain and Bush and their political maneuvering. You have to read this whole thing to appreciate it:

Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson['s] $700 billion bailout... fell apart in bitter arguing during the meeting at the White House called by President Bush... [which was held] at the urging of John McCain. [The Dems] jointly deferred to Barack Obama, who set forth the[ir] concerns. One Republican at the meeting told Politico that Obama's leading role -- versus McCain's nearly silent role at the meeting -- was "an ambush" and the Democrats "did a very good job" of surprising Bush and McCain.
Obama immediately raised concerns that House Republicans had spent the day secretly plotting with McCain to sabotage the Bush/Paulson plan. Obama said the Democrats would not be party to advancing any bailout plan if McCain and the Congressional Republicans were not solidly behind the plan. Congressman Paul Ryan (R-WI) -- one of the fiscal hawks who had been crafting the conservative alternative plan -- confirmed that the House Republicans had met with McCain during the day as they worked on the rival plan. ..."This is such a crisis I'm not going to draw some line in the sand. We can't leave without doing something, but we don't think the votes are here for Paulson," said Ryan. As the White House meeting degenerated into bickering, the Democrats walked out to caucus...

Here's the short version of the rest: Paulson apparently (literally!) got down on his hands and knees in front of Pelosi and begged them not to quit the talks. According to Politico, his worst fears about what Bush and McCain would try to do-- that is, play politics with the legislation and try to give most of the gargantuan payoff to those who didn't need it, like CEOs-- were confirmed and the talks stalled. The Democrats and Republicans sectioned themselves off and continued into the evening with the discussions, leaving some to wonder...

4)... is John McCain going to show up for the debate? As we've said before, if he doesn't, he could get trashed like no Republican has been since Bob Dole's bumbling 1996 campaign. Obama would be able to mop the floor with him in a town hall-style discussion and emerge the almost unbeatable frontrunner. John McCain: are you getting any of this?!

More via Politics1.

Related:

BREAKING: John McCain Suspends His Campaign

Gay Community Attacks McCain By Outing His Chief Of Staff

Which Candidate Spends More on Make-Up Than We Do On Shoes?

McCain Was "Tasty" and "Good Kissing" According to His Brazilian Lover

Dolly Parton for Vice President!

Emily Farris — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 15:27:00 GMT

You know, if we're going to elect a bubbly woman with big hair and an even bigger personality to the While House, shouldn't it be a woman we love and respect, like Dolly Parton? In fact, shouldn't it just be Dolly Parton? Can we forget all of this white man vs. black man vs. white haired man vs. woman business and just elect someone that everybody in the entire world loves?

No?

Well, can we at least rent an RV and go to Dollywood after we see the musical adaptation of 9 to 5 (one of the best movies ever) on Broadway? Because we have a feeling we're going to be pretty bummed in a few months, and we're going to need somone like Dolly to cheer us up.

Almost 30 years after starring in the movie "9 to 5" and writing its hit theme song, country star Dolly Parton's first stage musical gets its world premiere in Los Angeles on Saturday before heading for Broadway.

Parton, 62, wrote 17 new songs for "9 to 5: The Musical" -- a comedy set in 1979 about three female office workers who turn the tables on their sexist, male boss.

Despite having 26 hit singles and writing the classic "I Will Always Love You", "9 to 5: The Musical" is Parton's first stab at writing lyrics and music for a full stage musical.

"I found it more enjoyable than I thought. You have more freedom than when you write a song ... usually it's a couple of verses and chorus and a bridge and you have to keep it down to about three minutes in order to get radio play," Parton told Reuters on Thursday.
"I just wrote until I said what I felt the character should say. I was very pleased it came out as good as it did because I wasn't sure if I could even do it," she said.

Have we died and gone to musical theater heaven?

Count us in. We will do whatever it takes to get close to this show, even if it means working as a bathroom attendant.

[Reuters: Dolly Parton reworks "9 to 5" for first musical]

Related:

Hey Fellas, You Might Have A Shot With Dolly Parton

Girl Crush of the Day: Dolly Parton

Scanner Peer Mentoring Program: Amy Winehouse

This Week In Gayness: Lesbians Pick The Sexiest Woman Over 50

Top 5 Rumors We'd Like to Start About Sarah Palin... But Won't

This Week In Gayness: Sex Lives of the Gay and Famous

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 16:47:00 GMT

An Oregon State Senator doesn't think gays should have workplace protections that keep them from being fired for their sexuality. His advice to the LGBT community?

"My advice to the gay community is SHUT UP, just don’t talk about it." [JustOut]

Damn-- these small town elections are learning way too much from the Democratic Presidential candidates. Even a County Comissioner's race in some unknown Florida town is getting out of hand, as Kevin Becker (D-Gay Man) and Brian Blair (R-Former Professional Wrestler/Hater of Gay Man) are beating each other to bloody pulps.

Konica Minolta is taking away a gay widow's death benefits because of a hidden clause preventing beneficiaries from moving "out of state." [CNN]

Would anyone be offended if we called the Royal Family a dirty bunch of pervs? Too late. Actually, they're innocent this time (and even if they were, a gay "sex act" is not necessarily perverted. Unless it takes place on Anton Scalia's docket.)

This is exactly what we prayed for in last week's post: The Brazilian government believes, as we do, that free speech stops with hate speech. They're going after homophobe bloggers for crimes against humanity. Fuck yeah, baby!

This month's Advocate discusses the potential for a very gay White House under Barack Obama. Four members of Obama's inner circle are out, including Steve Hildebrand, who sends millions of people e-mails every day pretending to be Barack Obama. Meanwhile, Republicans are stepping up in defense of gay marriage, including the surprise champion we now have in Ahnuld. [Edge/SF]

And there's a new book out called "Sex Lives of the Famous Gays." There are famous gays?! Does Us Weekly know about this? [Gay Book Blog]

Previously: While You Were Sleeping: Chelsea Clinton Got Down With The Gays; Which Would You Rather: Rufus Wainwright...

Unless otherwise noted, all news is sourced from topix.net. Photo via Family Pride.