Scanner : viagra

Sloppy Seconds: Free Viagra!

Emily Farris — Thu, 14 May 2009 23:01:00 GMT

Spring Awakening—the musical that made more than $57 million in the United States and made anyone who went to see it with his or her parents very uncomfortable—is closing in London after only five months. [FlavorWire]

Um, what kind of high school lets the yearbook team publish an upskirt photo? [BuzzFeed]

A new development in the Jon and Kate Plus Eight saga: Jon may not have been the only one allegedly cheating. Apparently, he had long feared that his wife was having an affair with her married bodyguard. [Us]

Ashley Olsen isn't the only woman modeling men's clothing. [AfterEllen]

Could Johnny Depp play Frank Sinatra in the movies? [Vulture]

Elizabeth Edwards will talk about her husband John's mistress, as long as no one mentions her name. [Yahoo!]

Just because you don't have a job, or health insurance, doesn't mean you shouldn't have your Viagra. Pfizer has s unveiled a new program will let people who have lost their jobs and health insurance keep taking some widely prescribed Pfizer medications—including Lipitor and Viagra—for free for up to a year. [Yahoo!]

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Believe It Or Not, One of the Best Sex Advice Columns is Brought to You By... Detroit

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 11 May 2009 17:03:00 GMT

The Detroit Free Press has always been one of our favorite parts about the Motor City. It's only natural that their sex advice column would do what no other paper does-- actually have intelligent conversations, many of which don't necessarily pander to the readers who just want a giggle-ready piece of entertainment.

This week, the Press tackles real topics like Viagra for women, lopsided boobs, and lies and the lying liars who tell them...

The column is hosted by the great and amusing Isadora Alman, who wrote that book "Doing It: Real People Having Really Good Sex," which is hidden in your bookcase behind the Charles Dickens box set. She's a certified sexologist (I'd love to have been at that meeting) and has done some psychotherapy, which helps when people ask you questions like this (emphasis added):

Dear Isadora: Why can't the drug manufacturers find something that will work on women the way Viagra does on men? For that matter, do Viagra and the other pills like it ever work for women?
Answer: Viagra does seem to work for some women. The reason is that it sends blood to engorge the genitals. Where that creates an erection on men already feeling desire, for women it simply sends blood to the area, which can feel like arousal to some women, but doesn't for most. Viagra and its like do not affect desire in men either, just the ability to have sexual intercourse. Because most women always have that ability (excluding painful conditions such as vaginismus), creating desire is what's complicating the creation of a magic pill. For many more women than men, the desire for sex is bound up in relationship issues and beliefs about appropriate behavior, and there can be no magic pill to deal with those psychological factors.
Dear Isadora: Is there any way to tell for sure whether your partner is lying to you?Answer: For sure? No. There was a rumor that one could tell always when a certain politician was lying. It was whenever he moved his lips! In all other cases you have to rely on what you know of the person's record of truth-telling...
Dear Isadora: My daughter's breasts are beginning to grow and they are coming in lopsided. Are they likely to even out when she is through maturing? She is 11, by the way. Isn't that early?Answer: Young women are maturing much earlier these days. The average age for first menstruation in the 19th Century was around 16; now it is 12. Better nutrition is one probable cause. If you look carefully at your own body, you will see that things that come in pairs are not exactly equal. ...

What do we think about her view that, for women, "the desire for sex is bound up in relationship issues," etc.?

You can read her full responses to these questions here.

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Manny Ramirez Takes Performance Enhancing Drugs...

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 07 May 2009 21:35:00 GMT

...the other kind.

LA Dodger superslugger Manny Ramirez has been banned from playing in the team's next 50 Major League Baseball games after he was found to have ingested a legal substance under the advice of his doctor. The drug? We'll give you one guess as to what it's for...

Ramirez released the following statement Thursday morning: “Recently I saw a physician for a personal health issue. He gave me a medication, not a steroid, which he thought was okay to give me. Unfortunately, the medication was banned under our drug policy. Under the policy that mistake is now my responsibility. I have been advised not to say anything more for now. I do want to say one other thing; I’ve taken and passed about 15 drug tests over the past five seasons.

A Major League baseball official said that if Ramirez had a legitimate need for a drug on the banned list, he could have applied for a therapeutic exemption. Ramirez, the official said, did not ask for one.

Have you figured out what dumbass, who is expected to lose out on something insane like $7-8 million dollars for this error in judgment, took to help himself out?

...two sources said the substance Ramirez tested positive for was a gonadotropin. Major League baseball’s list of banned substances includes the gonadotropins LH and HCG, which are most commonly used by women as fertility drugs. They also can be used to trigger testosterone production. Testosterone is depleted by steroid use, and low testosterone can cause erectile dysfunction.

“Testosterone and similar drugs are effective for erectile dysfunction in that they jazz up your sex drive,” said Charles Yesalis, a professor at Penn State who has testified before Congress on issues of performance-enhancing drugs. “But far more clinicians accept that affect with Viagra and Cialis. It’s hard for me to understand if it was erectile dysfunction why they would use it.”

So, let me get this straight: Viagra and Cialis are not banned by the MLB, so he used a substance that was? Dude, it wasn't worth it for the extra testosterone-- blood flow from ED drugs would've been a wiser move. Too late now.

Via Yahoo! Sports.

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Footballers Take the Blue Pill

Colleen Kane — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 17:11:00 GMT

Cyclists are known to train in mountainous areas, and other athletes train at high altitutudes to get an extra comptetitve edge, but a football (as in soccer) coach in Bolivia has taken things a step further.

The former phisotherapist of the team Blooming (that's not them above, but this pic is appropriate) revealed a rather unsusual prescription he wrote for at least nine of the players.

Rodrigo Figueora prescribed Viagra to help oxegenate the blood of the players, who hail from Santa Cruz but need to be at peak performance in the capital city of La Paz. Their hometown is at 400m (1,300 feet), while La Paz is at 3,500 m.

The players were unaware they were taking the drug, as it was administrated mixed with fruit juice.

"We prescribed it for several players, especially those who suffered most from altitude," the good doctor said.

And were there any...er...other effects of this Viagra?

"At altitude you win, you draw, you lose. The best results came when the team relied on strong tactical nous."

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Kanye and 88 Keys Shill for Viagra in New Video

Colleen Kane — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 16:08:00 GMT

Kanye West and his producer/pal 88 Keys got into oldface for Kanye's "Stay Up (Viagra)" video. It features lyrics like the following: "What she got is so Niagara/ Make a young n---a straight need Viagra/ Make an old n---a give keys to Jaguar/ Just to keep from all the the 'tee-hees' and laughter/ Her telling her homegirls that he couldn't stay up."

Here's the pair on the video set cutting up as dirty old men, which debuts Monday on MTV.

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Ask a Porn Star a Bunch of Weird Sex Questions

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 23:38:00 GMT

Are you guys fans of "Ask a Porn Star," the mainstray of the San Francisco Bay Guardian's blog? Sex SF, the sex-positive web corner for the Guardian, has been running these strange interviews for ages, but we've ignored the majority of them until now.

This week, blogger and promising young porn star Stephen Boyer answers your our the interviewer's burning questions about Viagra, boring porn sex, trannies, and getting a foot shoved up your bum...

I tried to do a scene with a trans-woman once and she couldn’t get it up. Then she started to complain that she was sick. After that, she started having all of these negative body issues and eventually broke into tears. A few minutes later, she was saying she wanted to leave the porn world once and for all.
One of the boys had just turned 18 and had recently run away from home because his parents were really conservative. He was struggling to pay rent so he got into porn. The “Survivor” thing was his first shoot and the director wanted him to bottom, but not just for anyone; the director specifically made him bottom for a guy with a 12-inch dick that was also really thick. When the boy’s scene finally came up, everyone was watching because no one believed he could take it. But he did.

We've spared you the next sentence, which involves a serious amount of blood and other gross descriptions. Here are a few other highlights from the life of the budding adult film star:

I have used Viagra before but it isn’t something I practice and do regularly because I don’t need it.
[Does his butthole return to normal after having a foot inside it?] For the most part, yes, it does. But I don’t have anal sex that much, especially after a rigorous scene like that. The first hour or two after the scene, I felt like I couldn’t hold my stomach in, but after a good night’s sleep everything began to close back up. Now, it’s like, I shart but not any more than a normal person. Sharting is still a rare occurrence in my life, if that’s what you’re wondering.

We weren't, but if you're intrigued, you can read the rest of this unusual interview here.

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Whoops-- Maybe The Sex Patch Isn't The Greatest Thing Since Sex Itself...

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 23:30:00 GMT

Procter & Gamble's much-publicized Intrinsa sex patch was rejected by the Food & Drug Administration five years ago for several reasons.

The fact that a sexual device was not approved by the American government should come as no surprise, but perhaps the Brits should have taken note of the FDA's reasoning.

Intrinsa, a testosterone patch for postmenopausal women, is designed to combat sexual dysfunction and has been available in Europe for several years, according to Reuters. But until now, there was little sign of danger. Minor side effects had been reported and the most serious concern we'd heard is that Instrinsa was failing to provide any sort of positive effect-- sort of like your average Viagra knockoff available for $12 per 100mg's on the internet.

Recently, The Drug and Therapeutics Bulletin reported on these recent studies and found that "the long term safety of the treatment is unknown. Unwanted side effects are common and not always reversible. For all these reasons, we cannot recommend Intrinsa for use in women with sexual dysfunction."

Guess we're back to the drawing board on solving female sexual dysfunction... although the jury's still out on whether Cialis or Viagra are living up to their hype at the other end of the spectrum...

Photo via this link.

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Sometimes Viagra Does Not = Viva

Colleen Kane — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 15:56:00 GMT

So...if we are to believe this latest gem from The Sun, that gleaming beacon of trash news in an otherwise-bleak and overcast Great Britain, a Russian man guzzled a bottle of Viagra, and hijinks ensued.

Two women bet Mechanic Sergey Tuganov about $4300 that he couldn't keep going for 12 hours. He did last the 12 hours, goes the story, but then promptly dropped dead of a heart attack moments after his victory.

Nothing but class as usual from The Sun. Their photo caption read Orgy ... Viarga (sic).

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Eternal Hardons Landing Men in ER

Colleen Kane — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 22:27:00 GMT

Announcers in commercials for Viagra and other pills treating erectile dysfunction typically murmur some fine print at the end about "consult your doctor if erections last longer than four hours." Then everybody in the room has a chuckle because that doesn't really happen!

Oh, but apparently it does, and worse: in the case of some clinic patients in Minnesota, their impotence injections are causing erections lasting double that.

Several patients from the Edina Clinic Parnell Medical Group showed up in the emergency room with boners that wouldn't quit (there's a porn title in there somewhere). One poor 55-year-old had to have blood removed from his penis with a "large-bore needle," reportd the Twin Cities' Star Tribune. Adding insult to injury, this is a private clinic that doesn't accept medical insurance, so the men paid $200 just for their visits, plus $125 to $250 for the medicine.

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Website Tracks the Worst Personal Ads From Desperate Dudes

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 23:32:00 GMT

Why Women Hate Men is another one of these websites/blogs designed by guys who are trying to impress women by how much they, too, "despise all the loser single dudes out there so pick me pick me!"

We must point out that, like all men, the individual purporting to be this site's webmaster is a dangerous degenerate. And if you think I'm being sarcastic or "humorous," you are sadly, sadly mistaken. (See above photo of owner for explanation.)

Here are some of this individuals examples of "why women remain single." We thought it was because moving costs are skyrocketing, but it shows you what we know about dating:

feeling very needy right now-39M

my girlfreind left me for another man leaving me all alone, Do you want to be helper in making my life better, I need someone to take care of me and cook for me help me wash my clothes and help me going to work until my car is fixed. I am 6 feet tall and avergae sized, would like to meet women, and please have car for work, i will try and help you pay you back. i am alergic to cats also so don't have cats

ALLOW ME TO HELP SOLVE YOUR HUSBANDS INFERTILITY PROBLEM

I am a 56 year old male. I have decided to get a vasectomy next month and I would like to impregnate a woman before I have this procedure done. It would behoove you to act quickly for maximum exposure to my sperm. I will only do this naturally without condoms. If your husband can't do the job, I can.

Having been asked previously by several couples who were friends of mine to donate sperm, I learned from their doctors that I have an extreme sperm level. I can give you multiple loads of sperm per meeting to increase your chances of getting pregnant.

Many of my physical traits are influenced by recessive genes. Therefore, it is most likely that the child would resemble the mother in most instances. It will be easy to deceive your family and friends into thinking it is your husbands child. It will be our secret. You will not see me again.

If you are 18-24, healthy, attractive, I am available to you. I will be very attentive, supportive, and encouraging, during this process. My vasectomy is in 5 weeks so it would behoove you to contact me as soon as possible.

Just a shot in the dark here, but I've been trying out VigRX for a little while now, and I do notice that I'm getting harder and longer lasting erections (while in self-satisfying mode). It's supposed to be a penis enlargement pill, but apparently it has viagra like qualities as well. I do feel a lot harder. Before, I couldn't keep it up for very long with my girlfriend, but now I think that it might be helping.

Was wondering if any ladies out there would like to help me give it a test run before I try it on my girlfriend. She won't be back for a week so I just want to make sure. Steven XXX-XXX-XXXX

I Know How To Make You Cum. Even If You Haven't Before.

And I know how to do it too. I got some pointers listening to some woman on a talk radio show. Listeners called in. They asked questions and she gave good advice. I listened and took good notes. Now I know how to make women squirt. I can get you there even if you've never been able to experience your "Big-O" in the past. I'm available to host or travel. David XXX-XXX-XXXX

And two more from other sites:

“Here’s my problem: I just adore mature women at least my age or that tend to be 10-15 years my senior. I am baffled by the “type” of rejection that I have been getting lately. Now for the fourth time a woman has told me that I am “too handsome for her” and for that reason she told me that she’s not interested. Can some of you women tell me how this can be? It just doesn’t make sense to me.”

“Morning. I woke up with a random idea to get some drinks this morning. Any girls interested? I’m not looking for anything in particular, just a new friend to enjoy a couple drinks with (i’ll buy of course). I’m well educated, have an amazing job and enjoy meeting new people. Would love to go to one of the 6am bars soon.”

There are 6am bars?! See you losers later, I'm heading there now to meet an amazing girl who can handle my unrestrained handsomeness...

Via Why Women Hate Men.

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Ron Jeremy On Sex, His Grandma, and Why Porn Was Better in the 80s

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 19:38:00 GMT

Ron Jeremy may have officially passed John Holmes as the greatest and most famous male porn star in history. If Time Magazine is catching on to the cultural phenomenon that is hipster Ron J worship, then maybe it's time to crown him...

Here are excerpts from the epic and exciting tale of one Ron Hyatt, some waiter dude from Queens who worked in the Catskills and has always had the world's worst mustache. Apparently, he has been in an adult film or two, and got his start by taking daguerreotypes of his wang and sending them to Playgirl by intercontinental pony express, which may have been illegal.

[When] people looked up R. Hyatt in Queens... they were getting my grandmother, Rose Hyatt, who lived downstairs. My poor grandmother was being woken up night and day, mostly by guys. Playgirl likes to think that their audience is mostly women, but no, no, the majority is gay. My poor grandma had to move.
I wasn't getting the liftoff as quickly as they did. It was embarrassing. It's funny because now, years later when I am not taking Viagra and the other guy does, I am still slow to the punch.
We were up in the Catskills, and I had a very good sex life, to the point where when I was once late to dinner and told the maitre d' I was with a girl. He said, and I remember his exact words, "Anybody else I would forgive but with you it's like brushing your teeth. You're late; you're being docked pay."
I just loved acting, doing dialogue. All my friends were still doing theater off-off-Broadway and I was doing film. Yes it's porn, but it still goes into theaters. They still had acting back then. They had big scripts. There were no videos back then, no DVDs, no Internet. I came at a time they called the Golden '80s.
Most of them had been to college. Some have come from broken homes, some from abusive homes. What I tell kids when I lecture in colleges is that porn is largely a microcosm of Hollywood itself. There were kids who wanted to do something goofy and crazy. Some were actors who wanted to go for an acting career, like me, and settled for this...
I just did [a porno] a few days ago, a benefit for a great New York director who has serious colon cancer. We all did a free porn film. I did a sex thing with a sweet girl named Candy, she's actually here because we did a scene and she is staying over. (Giggling in the background.)

Here's the rest.

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Delusional Washed Up Rock Star, "The Crabs Won"

Scanner Matt — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 20:39:00 GMT

Steven Tyler is 60 and his band, who should have had the decency to break up or go down in a private jet by the late 80s, is 39-years-old. He did an interview with February's Elle Magazine where he openly talks about sex. But when his words of advice to all men are, "Lie till you die," should we believe any of the old man's stories? Here are some of the highlights from the interview...

ELLE: What can you tell me about your first sexual experience?

Steven Tyler: It was at the age of seven with twins.

ELLE: Where does a boy go to find naughty prepubescent twins?

ST: They sat next to me in the church choir. They were French.

ELLE: At that age, I can’t imagine you got the full ménage à trois.

ST: They took me home one day, and we had a you-show-me-yours-I’ll-show-you-mine session. Isn’t that great? You know, I look at their pictures now and think to myself, How much sweeter does it get? And isn’t it crazy that my ex-wife Teresa was a twin and my girlfriend now is a twin?

ELLE: So in your marriage to Teresa, was there ever any serious talk of bringing the other twin into the bedroom?

ST: I asked her for years and I got so smacked down.

ELLE: Since you’ve had a couple marriages fail, I wondered: If you could will your voice to be heard in the head of every man a split second before he pops the question, what would you say?

ST: “Don’t get fuckin’ married.” And “Lie till you die.”

ELLE: When you and Joe competed for women, who won?

ST: Well, we didn’t compete, but we did share. And the crabs won.

ELLE: In Walk This Way, the oral history of Aerosmith, the band’s engineer, Rabbit Hansen, said that band members weren’t to accept oral sex for the last 10 days of tour so as not to spread venereal diseases to girlfriends at home.

ST: That wasn’t the band’s rule. You didn’t have sex for 10 days at the end of tour, but that was so you’d be sure to go home with a full cup of chowder. If you didn’t, you were definitely suspect.

ELLE: Women know that men touch themselves. Isn’t that a good excuse for, uh, low chowder levels?

ST: That only holds with a woman the first couple times.

ELLE: In the ’70s, you once told an interviewer, “I’ll tell you what’s fun—finding the right stewardess and turning her upside down in the back of a plane.” Did this actually happen? I mean, aren’t flight attendants too busy to be nailing passengers?

ST: Are you kidding? They would tell me, “I’ll meet you in the bathroom in 10 minutes.”

ELLE: Do you think post-9/11 this might be harder to pull off?

ST: The bathroom’s still there. You just open the door and walk in. But if it happens now, it’s usually on night flights.

ELLE: Has any female celebrity ever shunned your advances?

ST: Never. I’m a persistent motherfucker. I’m very sensual and very rhythm-oriented and into poetry. Women can feel that.

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Fatties: Get Up, Get Out So You Can Still Get it Up

Emily Farris — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 19:48:00 GMT

Yo, men: does your waist measure more than 42 inches? Do you exercise less than 30 minutes a day? If the answer to both of those questions is yes, you might be putting yourself at risk for something much worse than wearing sweat pants while riding around on your motorized scooter stuffing McDonald's in your face.

According to a new study, overweight, out of shape men are at a much higher risk for erectile dysfunction than those who exercise at least 30 minutes a day and have a 32-inch waistline.

It should be noted that the study was funded by the National Cancer Institute, the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute, and the American Cancer Society, three organizations that want you to be fit and healthy. However,

Researchers at the Harvard School of Public Health (HSPH) also found strong links between obesity and impotence. When obesity was combined with smoking, the risk of impotence was even greater.

Reporting in The Journal of Urology, HSPH’s Constance Bacon said they studied more than 22,000 men aged between 40 and 75 who news releases said they had good erections prior to smoking and being obese. After that, things started to go downhill. They also found that regular physical activity could lower the risk of impotence.

"We found a 2.5-fold difference in the risk of erectile dysfunction when we compared obese men who did little exercise with men who were not overweight send press releases averaged 30 minutes of vigorous exercise a day. For men younger than 55, there was a four-fold difference in risk for the same comparison," said co-researcher Eric Rimm.

More recently, the link between inactivity and impotence was confirmed by Johns Hopkins researchers. In their study published in The American Journal of Medicine, the researchers found a high prevalence of impotence among men with hypertension and diabetes.

Still, we have to question the newsworthiness of this particular study based entirely on the last paragraph of the "story."

To prevent impotence, eat the right foods, watch your weight, and exercise regularly. If you have the misfortune of being impotent, don’t despair since the pr distribution is treatable. Seek medical help as early as possible to avoid complications later. One popular impotence remedy is Erectasil, a topical lotion designed to “lift” your spirits and your body so you can be where the action is.

[Meadowfree Press: Impotence common in overweight men]

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Boy Takes Viagra To Survive... A Two-Year-Old Boy, That Is...

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 15:29:00 GMT

Someone should really get us a subscription to the Sun for Christmas because it has really become our go-to publication for insane and highly unbelievable news stories.

Today, the highly disreputable publication brings us the story of Calvin Muteesa, aged two, who has been taking up to six Viagra a day since he was three months old...

Calvin has pulmonary arterial hypertension, a rare condition which means his blood pressure is dangerously high. This starves his lungs of oxygen-rich blood.
The youngster struggles for breath and his heart has to work twice as hard to force blood to his lungs. Viagra relaxes his pulmonary artery, which carries blood to the lungs, and allows more blood and oxygen through.

Turns out that Calvin only began consuming the anti-impotence drug as a last resort-- a nurse offhandedly suggested it to the boy's mother, who realized that it might help with Calvin's blood flow issues.

Of course, it need not be mentioned that this is not a story that could ever happen in America. Most insurance companies don't cover Viagra (for anyone) and a few pills can run upwards of one hundred dollars by prescription. Universal healthcare anyone?

Via the Sun. Photo via.

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New Lady Gel is Going to Make Your Mom Feel Funny "Down There"

Emily Farris — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 15:35:00 GMT

Remember how your mom embarrassed you in elementary school in the eighties when she wore that low cut shirt and flirted with your science teacher? (No? Maybe that was just us.) Did you think you were past that phase when she went through menopause?

Too bad, suckas.

Doctors are testing a new female testosterone gel they hope can help menopausal women who've lost their interest in sex to get their grooves back.

LibiGel, developed for women with low libidos, is applied once a day to the upper arm. The testosterone enters the skin and the blood stream. And then, well, your mom might be hunting down that science teacher.

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Chicago Doctor: "I've Treated Hundreds Of Unconsummated Marriages"

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:53:00 GMT

Dr. Domeena Renshaw, a professor of psychiatry at Loyola University in Illinois, has treated over two hundred unconsummated marriages in her 36 years. That may not seem like much on paper-- unconsummated marriages are believed to account for less than 1% of total marriages, but imagine going, as some couples have, 23 years of sleeping in the same bed without ever once having had sex...

Part of us says "WTF?!" while another part says, "It's touching how strong the bonds between these partners must be if they're sticking together after 23 years without ever having sex." There's something sweet about that, for sure...

"I would have thought it would have vanished by now," she says, "but [we're currently treating] two couples."
Nobody knows how many relationships - married or not - have yet to include intercourse despite both partners wishing they could get the party started... Another expert, Talli Rosenbaum, a private practice physical therapist in Israel who works with couples in unconsummated relationships, says she has treated "a couple hundred" over the past 15 years.

According to Renshaw, there are several reasons couples never get around to the bonking:

1) Erectile dysfunction (duh)

2) Other physical problems, such as vaginismus (which happens when a woman unwillingly clamps down the muscles in her vagina)

3) Poor knowledge about sexual functions (meaning, somehow, both partners don't know what their gentials are really for)

4) Religious conservatism (they want you to make lots of babies, but they don't want you to know how)

5) Or other complicated emotional reasons

The article goes on to say:

These possible organic causes are why most therapeutic sessions start with a thorough physical exam, followed by counseling and confidence boosting. Rosenbaum sometimes prescribes pelvic floor exercises for women, along with the use of plastic "dilators" of increasing thickness. Of course, men can be prescribed ED drugs, too.
Often, however, unconsummated marriage isn't really due to the workings of the penis or vagina. For example, medical reports show such marriages are more common in countries with strict religious cultures. A clinic in Istanbul reported treating 404 unconsummated marriages in just four years. An Iranian hospital evaluated 200 cases in two years.

Indeed, religious and cultural pressure can be a tremendous detriment to the wedding night, which can only spiral if intercourse isn't achieved as soon as possible. Families can get involved, oblivious to the fact their "helpfulness" is only making things worse. Still, we were totally surprised to learn this is a major phenomenon anywhere, even in India.

You can read more of this story at NBC.

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Ladies, If You're Not In The Mood, CNN Is Here To Save You...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 16:49:00 GMT

CNN has solved the problem of a woman's decreased libido. Hint: they want you to become a man.

Their top 5 ways women can improve their sex drives:

1. Impotence drugs such as Viagra, Levitra and Cialis

2. Testosterone

3. Arginine

4. Anti-stress herbs

5. Experimental medicines

So, unless you want to try risky experimental medicines or "anti-stress herbs," which sounds like a scam, CNN suggests the best methods for getitng in touch with your feminine sexuality is by taking stimulants intended for males. For God's sake, how long are women going to have to wait before they get their own drugs or treatments for sexual dysfunction? Viagra's been around for how many years now?

Get on it, people...

Until then, CNN and the Journal of the American Medical Association report that, for some women, erectile dysfunction drugs do work. Has anyone out there (females only, of course) tried their #1 technique?

Via CNN.

Boners On Sale: $0.49/lb

Kelly Deerson — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 19:19:00 GMT

Scientists at Texas A&M’s Fruit and Vegetable Improvement Center (sounds like a correctional facility for broccoli, right?) recently discovered that watermelon has ingredients that deliver “Viagra-like effects.”

Dr. Bhimu Patil states that:

In watermelons, [beneficial ingredients] include lycopene, beta carotene and the rising star among its phyto-nutrients – citrulline – whose beneficial functions are now being unraveled. Among them is the ability to relax blood vessels, much like Viagra does.

With the Fourth of July right around the corner, we’re sure that watermelon consumption will be at its peak. Looks like that’s not the only thing that's gonna be peaking this weekend.

via Science Daily

Sloppy Seconds: Are Ryan Gosling and Scanner Emily Wishing Underneath the Same Big Star?

Emily Farris — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 22:17:00 GMT

George Bush and John McCain celebrated McCain's nomination by eating hot dogs. Makes us want a hot dog. Real bad. On second thought, no, it doesn't. We've just been waiting a really long time to use that Jennifer Coolidge hot dog line.

Simon Cowell will not be shilling Viagra. Not even for two million dollars. Not even for a lifetime of erections.

Though we're not big gun fans, we do like to cause trouble and really would have liked to go through the securty checkpoint at La Guardia with this gun bag this morning—especially after someone threw away our brand new tube of toothpaste!

Oh, awesome. More reality TV. All summer long.

And not that this has anything to do with anything, but we're madly in love with Ryan Gosling. Just thought we'd share. You know, in case he's out there wishing underneath the same big star. Because apparently that Michael McDonald thing isn't going to work out for us; he never called.

[Image of sexy, sexy Ryan Gosling via weblogs.variety.com]

Who Would You Rather Deluxe Edition: Fidel Castro or George W. Bush Then and Now?

Emily Farris — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 20:36:00 GMT

We know, this is more like the wrinkled dick edition, but seriously, both Fidel Casto and George W. Bush are going to find themselves with a lot of time on their hands pretty soon, and both were pretty good looking back in the day. So, this is a two part-er:

Part I: Who would you rather back in the day, Fidel Castro or George W. Bush?

Part II: Who wouldy you rather have as a sugar daddy nowadays? (We'll supply the Viagra).

That Clearinghouse for Viagra Gossip You Ordered Is Finally Here

Bryan Christian — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 19:07:00 GMT

Thank God we're currently at our dayjob babysitting Christian pre-K's at the Department of Homeland Security, otherwise we would probably lose hours looking at this amazing webpage linking exclusively to Viagra-centric celebrity gossip.

Where'd I Put That Crystal Buttplug?
Yanni's ex-girlfriend tells all about the New Age muzak guru's kinks, sex toy collection, and his jones for Viagra.

Normally we do this in a parenthesis, but seriously: thank you, "News"! You're directly responsible for bringing the first smile to our face since yesterday.

[Img via ICanHasCheezburger]

Fake Viagra, Interrupted

Emily Farris — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 18:23:00 GMT

Christmas came late for French officials. And it might make for a slow season for spammers. French customs recently intercepted 224,000 fake Viagra and Cialis pills worth $3.5 million.

Reuters: 224,000 fake anti-impotence pills seized

Sperm Rockets Ready for Blast Off

Nicole Pasulka — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 17:30:00 GMT

Isn't it great how this Viagra ad combines our fertility-lust with our space colonization fantasies. We can almost hear the voice over now:

In the year 2007 on the planet Earth, Viagra-fueled rocket sperm launched towarads galaxies unknown with nothing but a hormone and a dream of a better life to guide them.

Looks like science fiction now, sure. But when those giant three-headed babies from planet Zorbot land their space ships in New Mexico, don't say we didn't warn you. (via Copyranter)