Scanner : vintage

Vintage Erotica

Colleen Kane — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 19:50:00 GMT

Vintage Erotica is a new site that launched this week (from the ashes of Blue Vanities, hence the logo above). It's a searchable database of vintage adult content from the 1910s through the '80s with 8,000 videos (including the first porno movie ever made, from 1911) and over 200,000 photos.

So without further ado, four cute broads from last century, found on Vintage Erotica. (Hey, it's not gross unless you think about them now. Probably the first nudie magazines you ever saw were from a previous era, so this is similar.)

Scanner Readers Rescuing Vintage Nude Photos For You

Vintage Stewardesses Hotter Than 2008 Supermodels

Vintage Video of the Day: Riot Grrrls On 'Roseanne'

Emily Farris — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 17:54:00 GMT

When Roseanne was on the air, we watched it religiously, but we were too young to really appreciate what an amazing show it was—plus, we were too busy crushing on David and trying to be less like Becky and more like Darlene. Each time we catch a repeat, though, we're amazed at how well it portrayed the every-family (at least according to Scanner Emily). One episode we don't remember (probably because we were more Becky than Darlene) is the one where Jenna Elfman appeared on the show as a Riot Grrrl and gave housewife Roseanne a "wake up call."

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Calling All Vintage Vibrators

Colleen Kane — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 18:54:00 GMT

Meet Super Douglas, labeled both as a "heavy duty massager" and "vibrator," 120 volts, 30 watts, manufactured in good old Jersey City and purchased at one of my favorite NJ rummage sales for a few bucks. (The old man running the electronics section didn't seem to understand why I was so enthused to find SD...?)

Super Douglas is here today for show and tell because Babeland is looking for your antique vibrators, for possible inclusion in a TV segment about the history of sex toys.

Here's how to submit.

If you have old or antique sex toys that we could borrow, or that you might want to bring on the show, please send us a description of the toy and attach an image to be considered (.jpg preferred). Thanks for your help!
Please email your photo and description to funstuff@babeland.com by Wednesday, February 18.

Best,
Rachel + Claire
Babeland Co-Founders

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Scanner Survey: Vibrators

Hey Everybody, I Just Pummeled My Vagina!

Via Feministing

In the Blink of a Young Girl's Eye: The Glory Days of Porn Posters

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 21:34:00 GMT

"Well, there was a girl, she lived up the block... back in school, she gave all the boys head..."

Okay, that's not how the song goes, but we're just trying to keep the Springsteen flowing on today, the release of his new record, which has absolutely nothing to do with this post. It's been a very slow news day, so here's an assortment of amazing and hilarious porn posters you can use as your next PostSecret submissions:

Hmm, everything, you say? What about "fart porn?"

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Real or Fake? Katy Perry Nude Photo

Scanner Readers Rescuing Vintage Nude Photos For You

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While You Were Sleeping: The 3-D Porn Movie

Scanner Readers Rescuing Vintage Nude Photos For You

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 18:37:00 GMT

Reader John DeFeo has been restoring vintage pinup photos for two years and he's decided to share some of his rescue efforts with you, his dearest friends...

Here's a sample before and after of the restorative power's of John's hand (or is it his Photoshop?)

Hot damn, indeed. John explains his process, during which each photo was

"blasted with a compressed air treatment, cured with a non-abrasive treatment called Vitafilm, scanned at 5400 dots-per-inch, and retouched to remove stray hairs, dirt, water stains, holes, scratches, and restored to original color..."

View the full collection here. Unrelated top photo via this link.

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Who Is Katie Green And Why Is She Famous?

In Photo War, Patriots Cheerleaders Outdo Cleveland Cavs Cheerleaders

No, Wait, the Lithuanian Playboy Calendar Is What We Really Wanted

Real or Fake? Nude Photos of Obama's Mother

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 13:08:00 GMT

We're serious-- these could actually be real, although one blogger has an interesting theory that would cancel out that possibility.

Of course, the real question is: why are we seeing these photos now, less than two weeks till Election Day? Could this be some sort of ruse by the Right, now that the Ayers-Socialism-Muslim smear campaign has obviously failed? We found this on a radical right-wing website that claims Islamofascists and left-wingers are one and the same:

It's amazing what there is on the internet. A geneological researcher has emailed me with three pictures of Obama's mother in the nude. That would be of trivial interest except for the setting in which the picures were taken. They were clearly taken in a sophisticated mid-century apartment and my correspondent suggests that the apartment details could be used to identify the photographer. He feels that the photographer is the Communist "Frank" whom Obama mentions as his mentor. That Frank was so intimate with Obama's mother would support the contention that Frank was in fact Obama's father. Various bloggers have pointed out how similar Obama looks to "Frank" and the coverup of Obama's birth certificate is certainly very suspicious...

Yep, these people will say anything to drag Obama through the mud (since they can't win on things like issues, facts, and reality)... and apparently they'll take as fact what "a geneological [sic] researcher" e-mailed them. Groovy.

One Google blogger ("Anna") disagrees:

Sorry, I just don't see it. For one thing Obama's mother always wore her hair long and the woman in the photos had short hair. I think
they are barking up the wrong tree here which is so sad because there are so so many right trees that they have available to them.

Ah... yeah... there's so much else they can hit Obama on... such as... uh... that he once shook hands with a guy at a rally who did time for unpaid parking tickets. Terrorist!

Anyway, back to the photos... here's one. Compare it to the one at the top left and decide for yourself...

Her face kinda looks photoshopped here, so we're going to call bullshit where no one else is. That's a shame, too, because someone needs to call these despicable right-wingers out on this continued nonsense-- guys and dolls, if you have to resort to disgracing somebody's mother in order to win an election, it's time to admit you may been on the wrong side of the aisle...

Here and here are the other pictures. We don't have the heart to post them.

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MyZombiePinup: Get Ready For Halloween '09

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 15:16:00 GMT

Halloween is Scanner's favorite day of the year (and that includes our own birthdays.) Anything that involves 10/31 gets our attention... especially if it involves scantily-clad ~~humans~~ zombies cavorting for a raunchy wall calendar.

Of course, where there's zombies, blood, corpses, and carnage can't be too far behind...

My Zombie Pinup (tagline "where beauty meets brains") has unleashed its 2009 Calendar on an unsuspecting public, just in time to cash in on All Hallow's Eve. The 13-month calendar features "vintage" style shots of models cavorting around San Francisco's Golden Gate Park, all covered in blood, wounds, and pieces of their victims.

Warning: if that doesn't sound like something you'd enjoy on a Monday morning at work or if you are of the opinion that girls covered in blood is degrading, you might not want to...

...scroll down...

The calendar is available here for about $15.

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Scanner Roundtable: The Costumes That Got Us Laid

Scanner Roundtable: Our Favorite Horror Movie Stars

Happy Halloween! Buy Us Shoes!

Happy Halloween! Your 10-Year-Old Is Showing Cleavage.

Since When Were Any Pictures of Anyone Born After 1990 Considered "Vintage?"

Emily Farris — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 15:22:00 GMT

Or.... when did we get old?

Is it us, or should the words "vintage" and "MySpace" never, ever appear in the same headline?

If you watch Gossip Girl (like we do, with no shame, thank you very much), you might be nominally interested in these "Vintage MySpace Pictures" of Taylor Momsen on this blog apparently put together by a 13-year-old. If like us, you were born before the 90's, you might be interested in why they're called "vintage?"

Maybe you're just a creepy old dude who wants to look at pictures of a 12-year-old-girl. In that case, stop right here, Mister!

[OceanUp: Taylor Momsen MYSPACE VINTAGE PICTURES]

Hot, Lesbian Action Coming to Gossip Girl

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I Hate Myself For Loving You: Blake Lively

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20 Hot Women of Rockabilly

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:24:00 GMT

We'd like to add four more hot women of the past and present to this admittedly unusual list of Hot Women of Rockabilly:

Belinda Hartman of the Satellites, from South Australia. Make sure you check out "Jump," an infectious little ditty that moves faster than a speed metal song.

Brigitte Handley or any of her Dark Shadows, from Sydney, Australia; they are the hardest rockin' rockabilly kids on this list, arguably no longer even in the same genre, but worth checking out.

Barbara Pittman from Memphis, TN, who got her start thanks to Elvis, her fellow Sun Records labelmate and with whom she played during the famous Saturday night jam sessions.

Elana Fremerman aka Elana James of Hot Club of Cowtown, New York, NY/Austin, TX. She played with Bob Dylan (one of the only women ever in his touring band, even though she was only a special guest on a couple of dates), reached her peak of "fame," then inexplicably changed her name. Now she appears to be back with Cowtown, although the name change remains.

Via YouTube.

Vintage Video of the Day: Saturday in the Park

Emily Farris — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 18:13:00 GMT

We often want to live in worlds that exist only on screen. For the past few years we wanted to live in Roll Bounce, but look at what happened when we tried that. Then Queerty went and posted this classic Chicago hit "Saturday in the Park." And yeah, it's Thursday and we're stuck in front of a computer, but we're going to try and find a way to live in this video...without breaking anything. We hope it makes you as happy as it does us.

Retro Masturbation Material: Susan Sarandon

Emily Farris — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Maybe David Unger wasn't achieving the same kind-of orgasms he had in the 90's, or maybe he was just feeling nostaligic. Either way, he decided to jerk off to Susan Sarandon "for old time's sake."

"It was great to fantasize about Susan again," said Unger, who had not fantasized about Sarandon since 1994, when she played a tough-but-sultry lawyer in The Client. "It just felt natural and right. Almost like I never stopped in the first place."

"She still looks absolutely amazing," Unger continued. "Susan is just as sexy as the first time I climaxed thinking about her after that midnight showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Maybe even sexier, if that's possible. The years have been very good to her."

Alright, you caught us. This is an Onion story, but a hilarious one at that. Obligatory old-school Susan Sarandon boobs after the jump. And just think, we wouldn't have found them had we not turned off our SafeSearch!

[The Onion: Susan Sarandon Masturbated To For Old Time's Sake]

Vintage Finds: Spring Loaded Beauty Mask

Emily Farris — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 15:31:00 GMT

Grandma always told us a lady should sacrifice comfort for beauty. She also liked to remind us that she was 118-pounds when she got married. Come to think of it, she often told us not to look at Black people funny or they'd shoot us, so maybe we shouldn't have listened to the sacrificing-comfort-for-beauty part. Still, we do, to an extent — you know if it means not eating a cheeseburger and fries three times a day even though we want to, and squeezing into jeans that make it hard to breathe.

Anyway, Grandma would have been only 18 when this "Face Harness for Milady's Beauty" was advertised in 1933, and we know she was hit hard by The Great Depression, so she probably didn't have one. And if she did, and gave it away, that would break our hearts, because imagine going through Grandma's costume jewelry after she died (which we most certainly did), and finding this. We wouldn't have the first clue what to do with it. First guess would have been some weird pre-vibrator, electric-shock, orgasm-producing underwear. And we'd have thought Grandma to be very, very cool. But if she'd kept the newspaper clip...

[ModernMechanix via BoingBoing]