Scanner : virginity

Would You Pay $13,000 For Her Virginity?

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 14:49:00 GMT

Alina Percea is and eighteen-year-old student from Romania now residing in Germany. Recently, she put herself up for auction with a Buy It Now sort-of price of $75,000. That didn't go so well-- Percea ended up settling with an anonymous Italian man for the equivalent of about $13,000 US.

She says she's giving away her virginity in order to help stabalize her family's financial situation. Our question is-- would you, even if you were dirt poor, sell your virginity for so little? Or would you go for even lower? And guys, would you pay $13K for her time?

Percea's case is interesting because the recent virginity auctions, such as that of Natalie Dylan's, involved at least six or seven figures in American dollars. Perhaps Percea should've called the New York Post before the sale ended, as now she's getting the kind of publicity that would've bumped up the bids:

The auction was hit by controversy three weeks ago when a teacher at Alina's former school claimed she was not a virgin.
But Alina, who had already undergone a medical examination, was seen by a second doctor, who confirmed at a press conference she'd never had sex.
'I'm glad it's all over and I'm excited that soon I'll be meeting the winner,' she said. 'I'm not too nervous, because I know I'm doing the right thing for my family.' She admitted: 'Ten thousand euros is not so much money, even in Romania. But it will be enough. 'I hoped I'd be able to have an apartment in town. But now I will live with my parents while I go to university. I hope to find a good job with the police, so I can support my sister and brother through college too.' [Daily Mail]

She wants to find a job in law enforcement?! A rather interesting choice, one must admit, for one who sold herself over the internet...

Related:

This Week in Sex: We Couldn't Stuff It All In

Brando's Beej Shot

Twilight's Deleted Sex Scene

Mom Tries to Help Her Down's Syndrome Son Score

Colleen Kane — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:37:00 GMT

Lucy Baxter is a campaign leader for Down's syndrome rights and member of the Down's Syndrome Association with four adopted Down's syndrome sons. Son Otto is 21, wants to have sex (as evidenced by his quote, "I want to have sex") and so Lucy has helped him set up a Bebo profile to find a girlfriend and achieve his goal.

She doesn't mind if he has to pay for it in Amsterdam.

And that's where it gets a little sketchy. In some quotes, it sounds like Lucy has her heart in the right place.

"Why should these people be kept separate and pigeon-holed when they have the same emotions, desires and feelings as so called 'normal' people. He has the same expectations as everybody else."

But elsewhere it sounds like she might be a little too invested in her son's goal.

"If he doesn't get a girlfriend, I will feel really bad, because I have sold him this thing that he is like everybody else," she said. "That's why I'm working overtime to get this sorted for him."

No pressure for grandkids, Otto! (Oh wait, there is-- Lucy wants grandkids.) Otto has kissed a few ladies so far.

Today in WTF: Virginity Pledges Actually Work?

Virginity Auction: Now How Much Would You Pay?

The Real Reason the Jonas Brothers Wear Those Purity Rings

Colleen Kane — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 20:30:00 GMT

When Kenny takes his new gf to a Jonas Brothers concert on this week's South Park in hopes of getting a little somethin' somethin', his hopes are dashed by the Jonas-endorsed purity rings.

What's the deal with those purity rings? Why do the J Bros wear them? South Park breaks it down, as per usual. Or rather, Mickey "The Boss" of Disney, lays the smack down in the name of selling sexuality to young girls.

Related:

Isn't It Ironic? Jonas Brothes Lurve Britney Spears

Scanner Roundtable: Purity Rings

While You Were Sleeping: The 10 Biggest Music Moneymakers

Image: TMZ

My Deflowered Memoir Is Not So Flower-y

Emily Farris — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 16:11:00 GMT

I lost my virginity to my manager at Just For Feet ("The world's largest athletic shoe store!") two weeks before my 18th birthday in his apartment behind the bowling alley behind the mall. He was 23 and had just broken up with his fiance. It was less than spectacular.

That is the abridged version of my deflowering. If I were to tell you the longer vesion I might include the part where I left thinking "wasn't that supposed to hurt?"

If I were to write the longer version, I might also submit it to Deflowered Memoirs, a new website (and hopefully book) that shares women's stories of their first times.

Because I was sick with nerves, I wanted to treat him like a sex deliveryman who had come to quickly perform a service…to rid me of this stupid embarrassing leftover of babyhood. Then, he could be off to his next sad and pathetically old virgin client. Unfortunately, he wanted to eat before we got started. So, we went to the local Tasty Freeze, just like "Jack and Diane" of John Mellencamp's teen love anthem, which retrospectively seems ironically appropriate. Energized by burgers and fries, we headed back to my apartment, where I nervously attempted small talk. Thankfully, Mike grew impatient quickly. He clumsily lifted me mid-sentence, pushed me hard against the nearest wall, and shoved his tongue down my throat. "It's beginning" I thought with relief as he carried me to my room, threw me on the bed, disrobed me and deflowered me. There was no pain, no blood. I even had an orgasm thanks to his "cunning linguistics." About five minutes in to the experience I thought, “this is so not a big deal. What the fuck was I worried about?” Nevertheless, when it was over, I prayed for him to leave. I didn't want to be bothered with a post-coital intimacy that didn't exist. Thankfully, he did; and I quickly called Jackie to tell her all about the experience. Then, I made a list of other boys I wanted to "hang out" with now that the virginity monkey was off my back. But, before moving on to that list, I decided to travel north to Indianapolis to perfect my skills with Mike the following weekend…and the weekend after that, and the one after that…and then all hell broke loose...and I realized that perhaps sex wasn't as perfectly simple as I wanted it to be.

That's an excerpt from creator Abby Kincaid's memoir. But it sure does sound a lot like ours.

[Deflowered Memoirs]

Related:

When '2 Become 1' Becomes 25 Cents, or How I Didn't Lose My Virginity to the Music of the Spice Girls

Virginity Auction: Now How Much Would You Pay?

Your Frenemy's Christmas Gift: The Artifical Virginity Hymen

FOXNews Claims Jesus Will Guard Your Daughter's Vagina

Virginity Auction: Now How Much Would You Pay?

Colleen Kane — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 16:24:00 GMT

Last fall, 22-year-old student Natalie Dylan began an auction for her virginity, at the time drawing offers up to $243 grand. She hasn't upped the ante and thrown in any extra action, but her commanding price has since skyrocketed.

She's now gotten offers from more than 10,000 potential deflowerers, and the high bid is up to $2.5 million.

Natalie decided on this stunt to pay for her Master's Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy after her sister paid her own way with a three-week hooking stint. (We at Scanner are really in the wrong business. Already knew that, but just sayin'.)

There's all these quotes from her about how she's all empowered and was a woman's studies major in undergrad and stuff, but we're too bored to share her rationalizations. Read all about it here.

Related:

22-Year-Old Woman Auctions Off Virginity On Howard Stern

Italian Model's Virginity For Sale (And For Only $1.5 Million!)

Virginity: Free With Purchase Of Medium Or Large Drink

Image: Bancroft Media

Today in Studies that Freak Us Out: Breakfast and Sex

Emily Farris — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 17:01:00 GMT

We read quite a few news stories about studies here at Scanner. Generally, we pass them over, sometimes rolling our eyes, other times not even caring enough about the subject matter to waste the energy of actually moving our eyes. Today, however, we were intrigued by a headline and after reading the first paragraph—"that those who skipped breakfast in their early teens first had sexual intercourse at an average age of 17.5"— thought, "Holy Shit! That's us!" (Us, being me, Scanner Emily, natch).

Of course, the study was conducted in Japan, where apparently the average age for first sexual intercourse is 19. But still, holy creepy correlation, Batman!

The poll was conducted in September by asking people aged 16-49 to fill in questionnaires about the age at which they first had sex and their lifestyles when they were in grades seven to nine.

Kunio Kitamura, the researcher in charge of the poll for the Ministry of Health, Labor and Welfare, said the study showed some interesting correlations.

"While it is important to delay sexual activities in order to reduce unwanted pregnancies among young people, the result suggests that the family plays a major role for that (delay) to happen," he said.

"An appropriately regulated lifestyle may be making some people prudent about sexual activities."

Those who said they did not have happy memories of family life or those who expressed feelings of hatred toward their mothers also had a tendency to have sexual intercourse early, the poll suggested.

Those who said they disliked their mothers first had intercourse at an average age of 16, compared with 18.6 for those who said they hated their fathers.

Oh, Jeebus....

[ABC: Skipping breakfast linked with early first sex: study]

Related:

When '2 Become 1' Becomes 25 Cents, or How I Didn't Lose My Virginity to the Music of the Spice Girls

Is "Tech Sex" Somewhere Between Cyber Sex and Technical Sex?

ABC Calls Drunken Teenage Anal Sex "Love Making," Interviews Jezzies and Ultimately Tries to be Helpful

Your Frenemy's Christmas Gift: The Artifical Virginity Hymen

How Long Were You a "Technical Virgin?"

[Image]

Your Frenemy's Christmas Gift: The Artifical Virginity Hymen

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Hmm, something tells us this "Revirginator" might be a fake. What do you think?

According to this blog, they're very popular in China... among scam artists...

On the Chinese city streets everywhere, you will find these ads:

"Your virginity back in 5 minutes"
"The product of high-technology! Your unspeakable secret will be erased!"
"Get your virginity back for 260 RMB!"
"No surgery, no shots, no medicine, no side-effects. Only 260 RMB!"

Then we received an e-mail, ostensibly a promotional link but arguably straight-on spam. Emphasis added and all spelling/typos/grammatical errors are theirs:

Wow! Artificial Virginity Hymen, for ladies! Now you can let your man experience the first night again and stay virgin always. To get back your first night, insert this Artificial Virginity Hymen to your pussy, carefully, then it will expand a little and you will feel a little tight. When penetrate, this thing will ooze out a realistic blood. Yeah, with some groan and moan (o oh oOo. Oh oh yeah!), you will pass through undetectable. Please remember to clean your vulva after sex.

“The Artificial Virginity Hymen is created from Kyoto back in 1993 then firstly used by the local and soon got famous in Thailand in 1995 and now in south east asia, south asia and middle east countries. The Artificial Virginity Hymen is made of natural albumin, medical use inflation element and water-soluble base medicinal preparation which have no side effect.” [Link]

There were large-sized pics to go with the link, but the description is gross enough. Blogs are picking this story up now and running it straight. How much you want to bet not even a virgin guy would believe his female partner was still a virgin if she used this?

Warning: Do NOT purchase.

Sloppy Seconds: Is The Pill Making the World Unhappy?

Virgin Mary as Never Seen Before: In Mexican Playboy

Is "Tech Sex" Somewhere Between Cyber Sex and Technical Sex?

When '2 Become 1' Becomes 25 Cents, or How I Didn't Lose My Virginity to the Music of the Spice Girls

Update on That Girl Who IM'd Her Dad About Losing Virginity

Colleen Kane — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 21:00:00 GMT

A story spread over the Internet that a young lady named Lizzy Frisinger sent her dad an instant message about losing her virginity, thinking she was messaging a friend. It was picked up by The View, The Today Show, and the Tonight Show.

We can all identify with the horror of sending off a personal text or email to the wrong person, although how this story was leaked to the media wasn't so clear.

Now it can be told:

It was a hoax, from the same folks who cooked up the Trump-tips-10K hoax, on a photo blog called The Chive, with a logo and slogan very similar to that of The Onion."Lizzie" was played by actress Janna Beth, girlfriend of hoaxer John Resig. What do they have to say for themselves? "You don’t have to worry about us pulling this again. The Chive is a photo blog, not a news source."

Today in WTF: Virginity Pledges Actually Work?

22-Year-Old Woman Auctions Off Virginity On Howard Stern

"Dad, Guess Who Lost Their Virginity Last Night?"

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 18:53:00 GMT

This eighteen-year-old girl made the mistake we've all had nightmares about: IMing"Dad" when we meant to tell "Darcy..."

Elisabeth Frisinger was on a class trip with all her high school chums from Cleveland, Ohio when she decided to jump on IM.

Lizzy: "OMG! Just had 1st time on beach! Gr8! Wish u were here!"

Jesus Christ, woman, you write texts worse than I IM and you're old enough to lose your virginity? No wonder Dad, whom you accidentally messaged instead of your friend Darcy, is pissed:

We would be convinced of this item's fakery if it weren't for the fact that her classmates took pictures of her misery (which we won't subject you to) and leaked the story in the first place, which Frisinger has yet to deny. And all she had to do was say, "Dad, I meant-- it was my first time checking out the beach on this trip." In this instance, her braindead use of English would've helped her.

Poor thing-- guess this is why you don't add your fuckin' parents to you buddy list-- use the telephone, that way you don't make mistakes like these! Duh.

Related:

When Drinking and Technology Don't Mix: Scanner Emily's Facebook Faux Pas

Video of the Day: Sexting

While You Were Sleeping: The Madonna-Guy Ritchie Separation

When '2 Become 1' Becomes 25 Cents, or How I Didn't Lose My Virginity to the Music of the Spice Girls

Emily Farris — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 16:20:00 GMT

When I moved to New York eight-and-a-half years ago, I came in a U-Haul packed full of junk, including wicker furniture, a Laura Ashley bedspread and a milk crate of CDs that, at the time, I thought were pretty cool.

While the wicker furniture was put out on the street years ago, I haven't been able to part with the CDs. I have lugged that damn crate to eight different apartments because I couldn't bring myself to part with the music of my youth—which in retrospect mostly sucks, and not even in an ironic way (the first CD I ever purchased was the soundtrack to the Adams' Family Movie).

Now that I'm moving back to Missouri, however, and am determined to not be the girl I was determined not to be when I left, I decided it was finally time to let the music (and some muzak if we're being honest here) go. I figured the stoop sale I was having on Saturday was the perfect excuse.

As I put the Dixie Chicks, Master P (which I still like, but it's a little scratched up) and Wilson Phillips in the box labeled "The Most Embarrassing CD Collection Ever, $0.25–$2.00," I came across a loose, teal CD. It was "2 Become 1" by the Spice Girls. I started holding onto it when I was 15 or so, because I wanted to lose my virginity during that song... in a clean bedroom full of candles. I did not have a clean bedroom. Or a large collection of candles. And I sure as hell didn't lose my virginity to the tune of the Spice Girls.

I don't even think there was any music playing.

The short version of the story is that I lost my virginity to my manager at Just For Feet when I was 17. The less short version is that I lost my virginity to my manager at Just For Feet ("The world's largest athletic shoe store!") two weeks before my 18th birthday in his apartment behind the bowling alley behind the mall. He was 23 and had just broken up with his fiance. I really don't remember much more about it. It was less than spectacular.

That was a few months before I moved to New York. I held onto the CD thinking that sex had to be better than that—that someday 2 would become 1 and it would be spectacular.

Over the years I lost the case. The CD got moved a lot, never played.

Saturday I put it in the 25-cent box at the stoop sale. At the end of the day it was still there. I looked at the back. It was totally scratched up and even a little cracked. [Insert tortured metaphor here.]

I never realized that the Spice Girls are practically having sex with New York City in that video. Good thing I still have the CD and 12 days left in Brooklyn.

Related:

How Long Were You a "Technical Virgin?"

Sloppy Seconds: Guess Who Has a Brand New Vagina!

Scanner Roundtable: Purity Rings

China Says "Virgins Get Better Husbands"

If The Casting Director Asks You To Remove Your Clothes, It May Be A Porn Audition

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 18:23:00 GMT

Or, in the case of these three women in the UK, if the casting director plays you a video of people having hardcore sex you're either a) auditioning for a porno or b) auditioning for a porno and should take off running before you get jumped...

Equity claims to have received numerous complaints about a production company that calls women in for an audition, ostensibly for a new comedy series with risque humor, then makes them watch pornos and asks them if they "don't mind a little cock and balls in their faces." Umm... isn't this sexual harassment?

Or a bad episode of Casting Cough or First Time Porn Auditions? (You know, compared to the usual really bad episodes?)

One actress reacts: "I thought they were getting us to sign this in case we, as actors, felt uncomfortable seeing the guy's front while the camera saw his back. They had planted a seed in our minds that it was like Little Britain, which does have nudity. They sold it as risque comedy, but clean at heart."

And another: "In my mind, it was hardcore pornography. To say this is comedy is just ludicrous. This would not be aired on any terrestrial channel."

What are you talking about, this isn't comedy? Have you seen an episode of First Time Porn Auditions? That's the very definition of comedy, people...

Quotes via the Telegraph.

Turkey Triple Threat: The Results

The 50 Sexiest Movies of All-Time: 20-11

Seth Rogen Dipped His Toes in the Sea of Porn, Decided to Go For a Swim

Top 3 Reasons "Twilight" Isn't Cool…or Sexy... or Worth Your $10

Scanner Matt — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 22:13:00 GMT

1. Mormons
2. Abstinence
3. There’s a better vampire movie you should be watching

Reason #1: Never let devout religious people teach or describe sex to you. It’s like having George Bush explain his foreign policy (a bunch of cautionary bullshit and no results). Stephanie Meyer is a Mormon. Yes, those guys who helped spearhead the anti-gay “Yes on Prop 8” campaign… and by the way, who the hell are they to talk about marriage?

How Mormon is she?

Well, she did get her writing degree at Brigham Young University.

Reason #2: Abstinence is not the answer. Just ask Sarah Palin how well it works. And furthermore does it ever make for good entertainment? Meyer substitutes a teenage vampire boy’s horny desires for his thirst for blood in a thinly veiled metaphor that’s supposed to teach “us” (parents and their confused teens, of which we are neither, admittedly) about “our” carnal urges.

Reason #3: Nine times out of ten there’s always a better movie out there than the one you’re watching. Not that our readers are knocking down theater doors to get to this holiday blockbuster (which they keep urging us to refer to as “the next Harry Potter”), but if you are in the mood for an entertaining vampire movie try Let The Right One In, still in theaters. A super hip and smart Swedish film (also based on a novel, not written by a Mormon) that tells the dark and soulful story of a little kid vampire. And it’s rated R the way all vampire movies should be.

"The Real World: Facebook" or Scanner Emily vs. The Mormons

This Week In Gayness: Lesbians Under Attack

Male Mormon Missionaries Go Topless For The Hell Of It

While You Were Sleeping: Winona Ryder OD'd

Photo: NYT

Snog Away, Teenagers

Nicole Pasulka — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 18:42:00 GMT

This is a picture from the online book boys and girls: a short book about choosing if and when to have sex. As you can see, the illustrations are classic Dick and Jane, and as far as messages go, the sex ed book is pretty standard fare: wait until you're ready, don't let anyone pressure you into having sex, friends who claim they're doing it, are probably full of shit.

But read by a saucy Scottish woman, somewhere along the line, this book goes completely off the rails.

Before you know it characters are calling each other "shite-bags who have never had a kiss off a lassie, let alone a shag" and sitting in pools of their own vomit while the main characters rejoyce in their love for each other and their decision to wait.

So, uh, yeah, not until you're ready kids.

Scanner Highs and Lows: We're This Close to Losing it to Sarah Palin

Emily Farris — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 21:29:00 GMT

In a month we'll either get to stop hearing about Sarah Palin forever or we'll be stuck hearing about her for four years. It kind-of feels like that time when you decide you're ready to lose your virginity and just need to find someone to lose it to. You know it's either going to be really great or really terrible, but you just need it to happen already... Right? Anyone?

Highs:

We may have found a man to keep us warm this winter.

And if it doesn't work out with that guy, we might still have a chance with Michael Cera.

If we get really desperate, we got hit on by this guy (even though they guy thought we were Sarah Palin).

We finally got our hands on the Sarah Palin swimsuit competition video.

We were on the local news, and this time there were no microwave dinners in sight.

We heard that Anne Hathaway liked anal. Then that she didn't. Then you told us you like Anal Anne better.

Lows:

We were forced to think of Hugh Hefner as a classy man (damn you, Joe "Boobies" Francis!).

We got in trouble for showing peen and had to take it down. Sorry.

We let ourselves be momentarily amused by Rachael Ray.

We had to listen to Sarah Palin talk for a really long time.

And we saw her nude. Sort of.

This guy gave us nightmares.

We lost a sweet, wonderful, beautiful man.

Sloppy Seconds: What Did Tina Fey Lose at the Emmys?

Emily Farris — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 21:04:00 GMT

Josh Groban says that "coffee and Nick at Nite" helped him prepare for his Emmy performance last night. Really? We were thinking crack and cheese. [People]

Um. Lowest rated Emmys. Ever. [The Feed]

Even with the part where that guy from Dancing With the Stars dropped Heidi Klum on her ass? At least she showed us her bruise. [FadedYouth]

Are the Cyruses trying to get fired from Disney? God, we hope so. [MollyGood]

The plane crash that killed four people and left DJ AM and Travis Barker badly burned may have been the result of a faulty tire. [Us]

Tina Fey didn't lose her composure, her top or her virginity at the Emmys. Nope, she just lost her purse. We think Josh Groban stole it. Hoping to find Sarah Palin's crack. Everyone gets so confused at these things. [People]

Italian Model's Virginity For Sale (And For Only $1.5 Million!)

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 20:28:00 GMT

If you could afford it, would you shell out a million-and-a-half for the right to be this woman's first terrible mistake?

Perhaps inspired by the well-publicized case of the American woman who has sold her virginity for (at least) $275,000, Italian model Raffella Fico has offered herself up for the princely sum of $1.5 million. You got it? Take a look at these photos from Fico's modeling career and let us know whether you'd fund her new house and "acting lessons." (Oh, brother... for that kind of money in the US, she could buy 40 homes in California and raise Marlon Brando from the dead for a weekend intensive.)

We're betting Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi has already called to inquire as to the location of the bidding.

Related:

Caption This: Agyness Deyn And Her Friend's See-Through

22-Year-Old Woman Auctions Off Virginity On Howard Stern

While You Were Sleeping: All The Harry Potter Kids Are Getting Naked

"Paris Hilton's Vagina Bites Penguin" And Other Classic Celebrity Spam Headlines

Weirdo of the Day: San Francisco's "No Sex" Protestor

The 99 Most Degrading Sex Acts... There Has To Be One More, No?

22-Year-Old Woman Auctions Off Virginity On Howard Stern

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 18:58:00 GMT

Maybe it's because he's been broadcasting from a secret undisclosed space station, but we're trying to figure out how Howard Stern thinks he can get away with selling a woman's virginity in this Puritan society...

According to the New York Daily News, a twenty-two-year-old virgin was set to auction herself off on Howard Stern's Sirius satellite radio show today. We can only assume, what with the photo of her, that he pulled it off.

The San Diego girl, who already holds a bachelor's degree in women's studies and wants to go back to school to get her doctorate in marriage and family therapy, hopes an online auction for her "honor" will fund her back-to-school goal. (If you doubt a woman's virginity will go for that much money, remember that someone paid $1.5 million for another woman's honor recently.) Her sister, who works at the famed Bunny Ranch in Nevada, offered the Bunny Ranch website and digs for the occasion.

[Natalie Dylan, not her real name] says the winner won't necessarily be the highest bidder. "I want someone with chemistry. We'll take bids until I find a suitor I'm happy with.”
Dylan was introduced to Stern by Dennis Hof, proprietor of the Moonlite Bunny Ranch...

Hof says the auction will be conducted online via bunnyranch.com, and that the deal will be consummated at the Bunny Ranch, where Dylan's sister already works. "I think it's a tremendous idea," he says. "Why lose it to some guy in the backseat of a Toyota when you can pay for your education?"

Question: while prostitution is okay in Nevada, who is Stern's radio show not breaking state law here in New York by arranging for this? Maybe he's just spreading the gospel, as we're doing, and isn't actually "pimping" her out?

Top photo via Esquire. Bottom photo via the New York Daily News. Check out the Bunny Ranch online. Below photo via Howard Stern:

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: And Just How Will Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson Make a Baby?

"Paris Hilton's Vagina Bites Penguin" And Other Classic Celebrity Spam Headlines

While You Were Sleeping: Better To Be Fat And Fit?

Sometimes Religion Makes People Stupid

Miley Cyrus To Remake Sex and the City?

Weirdo of the Day: San Francisco's "No Sex" Protestor

China Says "Virgins Get Better Husbands"

Woman Auctions Off Night of Sex, Gets Pregnant by Anonymous

Isn't It Ironic? Jonas Brothes Lurve Britney Spears

Emily Farris — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 15:33:00 GMT

"Jonas Brothers' Wish Comes True: They Meet Britney Spears Backstage At The VMAs," read the MTV headline.

This makes us chuckle, you see, because just yesterday, we were discussing the Jonas Brothers' ~~chastity belts~~ purity rings.

And just yesterday, they were drooling all over Brit Baby and her "shimmery asymmetrical minidress."

The boys, dressed in suits, posed with a smiling multiple-VMA-winning Spears, who was decked out in a shimmery asymmetrical minidress, for a picture together backstage at the show.

The brothers, who didn't win any awards themselves, told UsMagazine.com before the awards show that they wanted to meet the one and only comeback kid.

"We really hope we get to meet her," Kevin Jonas told the site following their rehearsal of their new single, "Lovebug," on a New York City set at Paramount Studios for the VMAs, which aired live from Hollywood on Sunday. "That would be an honor," Kevin added. His brothers agreed.

Ummm, in this particular scenario, is it okay to make a blanket statement along the lines of "this is what's wrong with Christianity today?"

Previously:

Scanner Roundtable: Purity Rings

How Much Did Britney Pay MTV for her VMAs?

Miley Cyrus To Remake Sex and the City?

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 15:05:00 GMT

Miley Cyrus, instead of going into hiding (our advice: fuck 'em if they can't take a joke), is responding to the latest "photo scandal" by talking about sex... which ends up reminding her of her idea for a remake of "Sex and the City."

"I'd love to do a younger, cleaner version of Sex and the City," she told US magazine TV Guide.

The singer and actress wear a purity ring signifying her strong Christian faith and desire to remain a virgin until she marries.

She explained: "I like to think of myself as the girl that no-one can get, that no-one can keep in their hand. Even at my age, a lot of girls are starting to fall and I think if [staying a virgin] is a commitment girls make, that's great."

She went on to list her favourite things as her Gibson guitar, her mother, grilled cheese sandwiches and "the Bible. It's my 'how-to' guide for life".

Wait, isn't her boyfriend 22? Maybe that's why he can get away with dating a 15-year-old. He's the only 22 year old left in this country who isn't sleeping with an underage girl.

Okay, that was a joke. Seriously, though-- what do we think about a virginal "Sex And The City?" Isn't that kind of just like "color bars at 2am?"

"I feel empowered when I see my face on a T-shirt. A girl wouldn't be wearing a shirt with me on it just because she liked my show. She must look up to me."

We like this girl more and more with each offhand remark. Then again, we strongly suggest she stay away from remaking recently popular television shows-- haven't you had enough backlash for one year, Ms. Cyrus?

Via the Telegraph.

China Says "Virgins Get Better Husbands"

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 19:29:00 GMT

While we were pleasantly surprised to learn that women in China still give birth to girls, we were nonetheless puzzled by this story in the Southern Weekly, one of the country's last bastions of progressivism...

Shen Fan's "chastity education" lasted over ten years. When Shen Fan was in middle school, she hardly played with boys, let alone went to any parties. She didn't play with boys, she didn't feel she needed to. Even now, she never goes home later than 9 o'clock when she is with her family on holidays.

Sometimes her mother tells Shen Fan her own story: When she was sent to the countryside during the Cultural Revolution, she and her girlfriends were determined not to marry peasants. Their determination paid off: after they went back to the cities, all of the "sisters" got married with government cadres, doctor and businessman—all of them urbanites. Every time Shen's mother meets these friends, she becomes even more proud of the right choice she made.

"My parents believe that the most important thing for a woman is to marry into a good family, and losing virginity before marriage is losing competitiveness, which may lead to losing an opportunity of a good marriage," said Shen Fan.

Is a girl who remains a virgin until marriage more likely to find a wonderful, sexually fulfilling husband (not that the Chinese government wants that), or a guy who is just interested in conquering a virgin, then will run off to start the cheating? Or something else?

Anyway, that's all beside the point-- check out the closing paragraph of the article, which will only further confuse you:

Now Shen Fan has a new boyfriend, but she has not told her parents, because he cannot meet her parents' standards for a prospective son-in-law. Another thing she does not want to let her parents know is that they had sex. Shen Fan said she tries to avoid wearing warm-colored clothes because that makes her feel less guilty.

Wait-- this is a story about chastity that ends with an unlocking of the chastity belt? Perhaps the writer had trouble finding any Chinese teenagers that were still virgins.

Meanwhile, the chastity and abstinence movement rolls on, further ignoring the statistics that say the program is only backfiring...

Via Danwei.

Today in WTF: Virginity Pledges Actually Work?

Emily Farris — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:11:00 GMT

According to a new study (that we're thinking might have been funded by neocons?), virginity pledges could be an effective way of keeping teenagers celibate until marriage. If you consider engaging in "sexual behaviors that fall short of full intercourse" staying true to one's pledge.

A study by the Rand Corporation research institute found that 34 percent of youths who took such pledges as teens had had sexual intercourse within three years compared to 42 percent of similar teens who did not make virginity pledges.

The Rand team said they had taken into account differences such as religious beliefs, parenting and friendship characteristics....

"Making a pledge to remain a virgin until married may provide extra motivation to adolescents who want to delay becoming sexually active," said Steven Martino, a psychologist at Rand who led the study.

"The act of pledging may create some social pressure or social support that helps them to follow through with their clearly stated public intention."

The Rand report cited estimates that 23 percent of U.S. females and 16 percent of males have made a virginity pledge...

"Waiting until you are older to have sex is good for teens from a health standpoint," Martino said in a statement. "There are lots of reasons for more kids to wait until they are older."

Martino and colleagues surveyed 1,461 adolescent virgins aged 12 to 17 in 2001. About a quarter said they had taken a virginity pledge.

The researchers interviewed them again one and three years later.

"These findings do not suggest that virginity pledges should be a substitute for comprehensive sexual education programs, or that they will work for all kinds of kids," said Martino. "But virginity pledges may be appropriate as one component of an overall sex education effort."

Really? It sounds to us a lot like making kids swear off of drugs. We won the D.A.R.E essay contest in fifth grade, pledging to keep our friends and family off of drugs and alcohol, and then spent our entire senior year in various stages of intoxicaiton.

[Reuters: Virginity pledges help some delay sex: study]

Related:

How Long Were You a "Technical Virgin?"

The Father-Daughter Purity Ball Is One Party Scanner Will Not Be Attending

Today in WTF: K-Mart Abstinence Pants

Hey George Bush, See What Your Abstinence-Only Education Has Done to America's Youth?

Abstinence-Only Education Doesn't Work

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R. Kelly is So Screwed

Emily Farris — Fri, 23 May 2008 16:58:00 GMT

A former back-up singer for R. Kelly broke down in the courtroom yesterday after admitting something that will probably get him sent to jail for a long, long time.

Stephanie "Sparkle" Edwards told those in the room that she was the one to introduce Kelly to his, uh, co-star in the now infamous sex tape. And that the girl most certainly was 12 or 13 at the time.

Kelly and the woman believed to be in the tape with him (who is now 23) have both denied making the tape, but like we've mentioned before if the prosecution can prove it's Kelly and the young woman in the tape, he's so screwed (in prison).

Edwards' testimony seems to help the prosecution in a big way, because like she said, "you just know your family."

[Yahoo!: Former backup singer implicates R. Kelly at trial]

[MTV: R. Kelly's Ex-Protege Sparkle Testifies That Girl On Tape Is Her Niece]

Virginity: Free With Purchase Of Medium Or Large Drink

Bryan Christian — Wed, 21 May 2008 18:24:00 GMT

Hey, any of you guys have one of those free-ish chicken sandwiches McDonald's was offering last week? We did. They were just OK. We could go on about how just-OK they were, but frankly we think we got off pretty lucky. Because according to Margaret McKeehan's memoir of Bible Belt sex ed classes, there are a few unlucky souls out there paying a much higher price for lunch.

It was a public school, so they couldn't justify saving sex for marriage on religious grounds. Instead, they justified it with social custom. A person is more valuable to their spouse if they wait until marriage. Virginity is a gift. Waiting is a gift. They split us up by gender and asked the guys if they would want to marry a virgin, and supposedly, they all said yes. This was particularly interesting because there was a sexually active couple in my class. The girl was devastated. They actually told her that her boyfriend probably didn't want to marry her because he was having sex with her. But the real topper for this class was signing a promise -- a promise for a chicken sandwich. Oh yes. Sign this paper saying you'll wait until marriage and you can get a free sandwich from Chick-fil-A. I don't mean to state the obvious, but nothing could devalue a person more than selling his/ her virginity for a chicken sandwich.

Well, to be fair: Chick-fil-a's chicken sandwiches are way better than the Mickey D versions.

R. Kelly Sex Tape: Set to the Tune of the Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys

Emily Farris — Wed, 21 May 2008 15:07:00 GMT

We never saw the R. Kelly sex tape when it made the rounds in 2002, so forgive us if we're a little shocked that it's set to the tune of the Spice Girls and the Backstreet Boys. Maybe focusing on that is our brain's way of blocking out the rest of it.

The jurors sure did see the tape yesterday, though. And they'll probably have to see it a few more times because it appears the only way Kelly is going to get off in this case is if the jury decides it's not him in the tape.

Anyway, for those of you lucky enough to have not witnessed it, here's what a jury of 12 of Kelly's peers were forced to endure yesterday:

The roughly 27-minute homemade video shows a man having sex with a young female, who is naked for most of the recording — except for a necklace with a cross dangling from it.

At the start of the videotape, the man hands the female money and she mouths the words, "Thank you." She is often blank-faced, impassive. The man speaks to the female in a hushed, monotone voice, and she calls him "Daddy."

Songs from the Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys blare from a radio. The female dances — the man out of view. Back in view, he has sex with her. The man walks up to the camera to adjust it a few times, but his face is often obscured.

As she dances, the female urinates on the floor. Near the end of the video, the man urinates on the female.

Okay, the peeing we almost get (almost, we said...but we hope the floor wasn't carpeted!) but the Backstreet Boys and the Spice Girls?

Maybe she really was 13, because when we were around that age we decided that we would someday lose our virginity in a candle-filled room with the Girls' "2 Become 1" playing in our purple CD player. If only it would have been like that and not to our manager at Just For Feet (the world's largest athletic shoe store) in his apartment behind the bowling alley.

[Yahoo!: Sex tape shown to jurors, court in R. Kelly Trial]

Jessica Simpson: I'm So Bloated, I Thought I Was Pregnant

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 18:16:00 GMT

Jessica Simpson is so much funnier in real life than in any movie she's ever miscast in.

According to the soulless Julia Allison's equally-soulless employer Star, Jessica Simpson lied about having a little pee-pee problem last month. It was actually more like an IV tube of Southern Comfort running 24 hours a day, pumping straight to her esophagus.

Reps for the singer said she was being treated for a "kidney infection," but an insider tells Star it was more than that. Jessica's health problems were "brought on by drinking an obscene amount of alcohol," says the source. "She was treated for a kidney infection, a bladder infection and a [snicker, snicker] urinary tract infection."

She sure did have a bladder problem. Between bonking Tony Romo so much that he couldn't even play flag football with his doomed Cowboys if he wanted to. (Didn't anyone ever see "Raging Bull"?)

"She used to keep her drinks to a minimum, because she's very conscientious about the calories," [said the source.]

We are pretty sure the part about Jessica cutting down on the carbs is true-- after all, she was making up for lost sexual time and her gut was becoming more pronounced. It's only natural that everyone thought she was pregnant when she was probably just trying out the Britney diet.

People, this is exactly why you're not supposed to wait until marriage to have sex. Because after losing your virginhood to a dirty old man like Nick Lachey, you will end up sleeping with every guy who comes along, every night of the week, after any amount of imbibing. (If you do, we won't judge. Unless you're Jessica Simpson.)

What's Cuter than Old People Writing About Young Peoples' Sex Lives? Nothing!

Emily Farris — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 14:13:00 GMT

Dr. Ruth is old, so old that she remembers a time when "a teenage girl would protect her virginity—so most sexual acts could be left off the table when it came to high school dating." And we're guessing that picture is about ten years old, making her, what, 113 by now? But that doesn't mean she's not with it. Her upcoming (and 32nd) book is titled "From Facebook to Friends with Benefits: Dr. Ruth's Guide to Parenting Teens Today." She probably started writing that before we even joined Facebook. And she's willing to explore the questions that have been confounding us for ten years.

"...today 'sex' includes oral sex and other acts, so the rug has been pulled out from under the excuse of 'I want to remain a virgin.' Yes, a teenage girl might not be pressured into having intercourse, but that's definitely not the case when it comes to not wanting to engage in oral sex."

Seriously, Dr. Ruth. Where we went to high school girls were giving out blow jobs like chewing gum and taking it up the butt, all the while claiming they were still virgins. So, were they or weren't they?

She doesn't answer our question, just yet, and instead moves onto more important topics.

"And here's another thing that has changed: Girls are often the ones putting the pressure on boys to perform sex acts. And since a young man is more likely to suffer from performance anxiety if he's under pressure, this insistence on sex is doubly powerful.

"Women are lucky in the sense that they can engage in sex without needing to be sexually excited, though having an early sex life which doesn't include any sexual satisfaction can lead to long-term problems for these young women. But a young man can have performance anxieties if he's feeling under the gun. I'm sure there were plenty of males who were once happy if they tried to reach under a girl's dress and had their hands pushed aside. He was fulfilling his role as aggressor, knowing that the young lady would fulfill hers as protector of her virginity. But today, not only won't she necessarily push his hand away, but if he doesn't make a move, she may well force the issue."

Yes, Dr. Ruth. We agree. But let's say we our friends engaged in oral sex way before they officially lost their virginity two weeks before their 18th birthdays. Were they still virgins or what??

[Forbes: New Teen Pressures on Sex]

"How About a F*ck?"

Emily Farris — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 18:07:00 GMT

We're not sure if this guy is for real, but a desperate 22-year-old virgin decided to ask 50 random girls on the street "how about a fuck?" According to a pick-up guide he read, this line would give him a 1 in 25 chance of getting laid. He was not so lucky. Could it have been his choice of wardrobe?:

I eat breakfast, have a shower, and get dressed as nice as I can; bronzer, white shoes, nice jeans, white belt, blue polo shirt, sunglasses, and disheveled hair. I leave the house and take the bus to a well populated place far from the house.

Some Approximation of 8-Year-Old Sean Connery Had Some Approximation of Sex

Nicole Pasulka — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 15:20:00 GMT

Sean Connery told Page Six he got started with the sexy times at the very young age of 8 years old. Considering how hard it is to imagine Connery at 8 and anyone having sex that young, we'll assume this is, how do you say...exaggeration. Then we'll watch Connery on SNL after the jump.

SNL- Jeopardy: Bjork, Dave Matthews, Sean Connery

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Teenage Leonardo DiCaprio Was So Not Laid

Nicole Pasulka — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 14:40:00 GMT

Number 467 on the list of things you didn't realize you never wanted to know about: Leonardo DiCaprio's virginity. Thanks to Russell Crowe's big gossipy mouth, we've learned that Leo was a virgin at 17. Now Scanner Sarah really can't understand why he didn't answer her fan mail.