Scanner : vogue

Crystal Renn: Big and Beautiful in Australian 'Bazaar'

Emily Farris — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 21:49:00 GMT

Crystal Renn is turning heads this month. And not just because she's a plus-sized model appearing in the pages of Australian Harper's Bazaar. It's because editors let her stay that way for their May issue. Unlike stateside fashion magazines like Vogue—whose editors pride themselves for featuring bigger girls and then Photoshop their curves away like they did with songstress and Scanner crush Adele—Aussie's Bazaar left Renn seemingly Photoshop free. And we like it.

Top 10 Hottest Women Size 10 and Up

Mean Girls: Paris Hilton Calls Former BFF's Ass "Cottage Cheese Inside a Trash Bag"

[Source]

Michelle Obama is In 'Vogue'

Emily Farris — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 16:06:00 GMT

Photographed by Annie Leibovitz, First lady Michelle Obama graces the cover of the March issue of "Vogue."

SNL's Attempt at Barack and Michelle Obama: FAIL

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Top 10 Hottest Women Size 10 and Up

Emily Farris — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 16:57:00 GMT

Late last year, as men's magazines were coming out with their hottest women on the planet lists, we started to put together a list of hot, normal-sized women. As much as we hate the idea of having to create a separate list for women size 10 and up, we can't imagine the editors of FHM or Maxim drooling over a size 10 or 12. You can call Beyonce curvy all you want, she's probably still only a size 6. Hence the need for this list.

Unfortunately, we got stuck at around seven. We couldn't come up with ten relevant, prominent women who were the size of the average American woman (14) who could turn heads. Frustrated, we gave up on it. But last week, when we heard that Anna Wintour—who, to put it plainly, does not like fat girls—was going to fill the pages of Vogue with pictures of British songstress and former Crush of the Week Adele, we enlisted the help of our girlfriends to complete the list. It turns out most of them were frustrated, too, that they couldn't contribute more than one or two names. "This is sadly hard!!!" wrote one, to which we replied, "Actually, it's infuriatingly hard." But three months and 37 emails later, we have a list of ten amazingly hot women who we assume* wear a size 10 or larger. We know we've left plenty of beautiful women off of this list (and we hope you'll list them in the comments section), but we hope you'll enjoy Scanners Top 10 Hottest Women Size 10 and Up.

10. Keely Shaye Smith
Though she has an acting career of her own, we really only know Kelly Shaye Smith as Pierce Brosnan's wife—and unfortunately only because tabloids made terrible fun of some bikini photos of her. But we give Brosnan two thumbs up for his beautiful buxom bride of eight years.

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9. Missy Elliott
We have a hard time imagining Missy Elliot in anything but a trash bag, but once she ditched that getup, she got pretty damn hot. (Okay, she was hot then, but the trash bag really wasn't doing much for her.)

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8. Janet Weiss
Is there anything hotter than a chick who plays bass? How about a chick who plays drums? Janet Weiss, former drummer for the now defunct riot grrrl band Sleater-Kinney, now plays with Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks.

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7. Sara Ramirez
She was hot as George's wife, Callie Watts on Grey's Anatomy, but now that she's bringing some hot, lesbian action to the show, we imagine Sara Ramirez has earned herself a whole new set of fans (including us!).

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6. Adele
Had anyone heard of Adele before she made an appearance on what will forever be referred to as Sarah Palin's Saturday Night Live episode? Lucky for her, and us, everyone was watching. Just a few short months later, she took home a Grammy for Best New Artist.

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5. Jennifer Hudson
From American Idol to Dreamgirls to her 2009 Grammy Award for Best R&B Album, whenever we see Jennifer Hudson, we can't help but be proud of our own curves. We usually also put on a tight dress and dance around the house to Supremes albums.

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4. Neko Case
Men want her and women want to be her. Neko Case is a woman you can't help but like, and the ~~former~~ front woman for the New Pornographers is beautiful with her firey red hair and pale skin. At first we had a hard time believing Case was a 10, but we have it on very good authority (a friend who works in the music industry) that she is. And we like it.

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3. Queen Latifah
Easy, breezy, beautiful CoverGirl, actress, singer and rapper Queen Latifah has managed to reinvent herself enough to remain relevant—and smokin'—for 20 years. Here's hoping for another 20.

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2. Nigella Lawson
Without the T&A we all love so much, Nigella Lawson could probably squeeze that little waist of hers into a size 6. But we would hate for that to happen. Not only is she gorgeous, Lawson has gone through so much shit in her life (she lost her mother, her sister and her first husband to cancer) yet still manages to make sure we all eat enough chocolate.

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1. Christina Hendricks
We have to bow at the feet of Christina Hendricks for bringing Joan Holloway and her gorgeous curves into our lives, and back into the mainstream popular culture. While she likes her dresses snug, we heard from someone who used to share her clothes that she's most certainly a size 10. And on a scale of 1 to 10, a 10.

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*Disclaimer: This size thing is based purely on our own assumptions and/or input from people who claim to know. But being a size 10 ourselves, we're pretty good at guessing these things.

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Scanner Emily's Top 10 Lessons Learned in 2007

Crush of the Week: Adele

Jennifer Hudson Looking Hot on Her New Album Cover

Sloppy Seconds: Obama's Brother From Another Mother

Emily Farris — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 23:31:00 GMT

Is Argentina crying for Madonna after she had to postpone a show there? Enh, probably not. [Yahoo!]

We're not the only ones with "sloppy seconds." [MollyGood]

Actor Mark Ruffalo's brother is "clinging to life" after he was shot in the head. [Us]

Duuuuuuuuude. A 2,700-year-old weed stash was uncovered in the Gobi Desert. Wonder if it's still good? [MSNBC]

Amy Winehouse's possibly soon-to-be ex husband Blake Feilder Civil is yet again Blake Incarcerated. [People]

Nintendo has come a long way, from boring old Mario and Luigi to video games with racial slurs. [MTV]

This is Barack Obama's half brother, we think:

[Via Daily Intel]

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Hot or Not? Cindy Crawford at 42

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 18:45:00 GMT

Cindy Crawford never has to do anything again. She certainly doesn't need to prove herself as a model, since she retains the record for most magazine cover appearances. But perhaps, at 42 years young, Crawford is restless.

She's been off our radar for many years, and might as well have been a star in the 19th century for all the fashion industry cares. Which may be why everyone's going batshit crazy over these French Vogue photos-- folks don't even remember who she is...

We're a bit conflicted: the first time we saw Cindy Crawford, she was in a Victoria's Secret catalog our eight-year-old (!) cousin had stashed under his bed. Cindy reminded us of Steven Tyler in a way that was vaguely distracting, and so we moved on to Claudia Schiffer. Months later, in Vanity Fair or some place, Cindy turned up again as her usual fantastic-looking self and we started to come around.

Now we're not so sure... here she is at 42, with a spread from French Vogue... what do you think?

More photos here.

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Man Steals Underwear from Victoria's Secret, We Share Our Victoria's Secret

Want Your Chest to Look Like $6 Million?

Anna Wintour: A Political Prophet?

Emily Farris — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 17:15:00 GMT

Does Vogue editor Anna Wintour think the election already happened? Or does she know something we don't? Because in an upcoming issue, she's chronicled generations of women in the Vice President's family. But—correct us if we're wrong—we don't have a Vice President yet.

Not that we dislike the way she thinks....

Ladies and gentlemen, the Biden ladies.

It is a Sunday morning in early September, and Jill Biden is standing with wet hair and no makeup in the middle of her kitchen, eating yogurt out of a plastic container. Her toenails are painted red, and she has the perfect late-summer tan. She's wearing dark-blue, skinny, non-mom jeans and an untucked blue button-down. Around her neck is a tangle of delicate gold jewelry and tiny pearls; from one chain hangs a little horseshoe made of diamonds. She smiles and laughs a lot, and when she does her deep-blue eyes flash with excitement. It takes only a few minutes of being in her company to understand why vice-presidential nominee Joe Biden somewhat controversially introduced his wife at the Democratic National Convention in August as "drop-dead gorgeous." Dr. Jill Biden—mother of three, political wife, college professor—exudes the confidence of a woman who has come into her own and is enjoying her moment. At 57, she looks much younger, partly owing to her daily five-mile runs. Her entire family seems to place great value on fitness. In fact, right behind her, hanging on the fridge with a magnet, is the cover of Time magazine featuring middle-aged aquatic wonder woman Dara Torres. Someone has written across her six-pack in black Magic Marker: OUR HERO.

[Vogue: All the Vice President's Women]

While You Were Sleeping: Obama Narrows His Choices

BREAKING: John McCain Picks Embattled Alaskan Gov. Sarah Palin For VP

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Sloppy Seconds: John Cusack's Stalker is Neither Off the Hook or Unattractive

Emily Farris — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 21:33:00 GMT

Are you surprised that there's an official Sarah Palin sex doll on the market? [The Frisky]

Guns 'n Roses Chinese Democracy, the follow-up to the band's 1991 Use Your Illusion, is really, finally coming out November 23. For real. Finally. [MTV]

Anna Wintour is in looooove! [Radar]

Poor Hugh Hefner. He's "in the dumps" after one of his lady friends left him. Perhaps one of the other two can console him? [People]

Because what TV executive hasn't been a gay porn star? [Defamer]

We can't really blame a girl for stalking John Cusack; who hasn't imagined him standing outside her window, wearing a terribly charming trench coat and holding a boom box over his head? So forgive us if we have a little pity on Emily Leatherman, the woman accused of stalking Cusack. Wednesday, judge rejected a plea bargain that would have allowed Leatherman to avoid state prison. If she ends up there, we'll send her casseroles. Totally without nail files baked into them! [Yahoo!]

Related:

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Who Would You Rather: Joe "Boobies" Francis vs. Hugh Hefner?

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**Blogs That Ain't Sh*t But Hos and Tricks**

Vogue Gives $200 Umbrella to India's Poor, Snaps a Photo and Quickly Gets in the Car

Nicole Pasulka — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 14:39:00 GMT

This is a photo from the August issue of Vogue India. It shows a man from Rajasthan in India holding a $200 Burberry umbrella. The woman has an Etro bag. It's probably safe to assume the models in these photos cannot afford a $200 umbrella and would have the good sense not to buy one if they could. But, it looks like Vogue figured using average Indians to model expensive good would make a pretty picture, or at least be cleverly tongue-in-cheek.

Obviously, not everyone agrees.

There’s nothing “fun or funny” about putting a poor person in a mud hut in clothing designed by Alexander McQueen, [Kanika Gahlaut, a columnist for the daily newspaper Mail Today] said in a telephone interview. “There are farmer suicides here, for God’s sake” she said, referring to thousands of Indian farmers who have killed themselves in the last decade because of debt.

Vogue editor Priya Tanna's defense:

Vogue is about realizing the “power of fashion” she said, and the shoot was saying that “fashion is no longer a rich man’s privilege. Anyone can carry it off and make it look beautiful,” she said.

We are all about the message that the trappings of wealth and power are no longer just available to those with wealth and power. But in order for that to be a convincing message, you'd actually have to redistribute wealth and power. Photographing supposed "have nots" with $10,000 handbags does not send the message that fashion is for everyone, it reinforces the message that very few of India's 1.2 billion people have access to luxury goods (shit, plenty of people don't have access to enough food). The photo's conceit "works" because you'd never see this in real life--not because you should, or could as Priya Tanna claims.

While this is definitely not the first time regular folks have been appropriated for the profit and amusement of privileged readers, viewers, visitors, etc., to do so in the interest of selling useless, over-priced crap is even more infuriating.

John McCain Signs His Wife Up For Topless (And Sometimes Bottomless) Contest

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 19:37:00 GMT

John McCain was speaking in South Dakota when he decided to make an offhanded mention of their local biker rally:

"I was looking at the Sturgis schedule, and noticed that you had a beauty pageant, so I encouraged Cindy to compete," McCain told an audience at the rally. "I told her [that] with a little luck, she could be the only woman to serve as both the First Lady and Miss Buffalo Chip."

The rally John just volunteered his wife to participate in features up to half a million motoycyclists... and lots of topless and bottomless women...

The audience, clearly better versed in the details of the pageant, cheered and whistled their approval.

Here are some photos from one of the 61 previous years of the Sturgis spectacle:

McCain's campaign has offered no comment on the allegations (that the Senator wants to pimp his wife out.) We wouldn't mind seeing Cindy get in on the above action, although you know what kind of boobs the biker crowd hollers for. (Hint: it's the big kind.)

Via Political Radar. More photos here.

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What Kind Of God In Heaven Lets A Topless Eva Mendes Photoshoot Go This Wrong?

Bryan Christian — Fri, 09 May 2008 20:05:00 GMT

Yuck. These pics of Eva Mendes from Italian Vogue -- we're thinking they're actually from the same shoot that Scanner Brian mentioned earlier today -- make us feel like we've walked into a John Waters-art directed acid trip. Actually, Eva's reminding us of someone here... who could it be...

(Click through for the answer -- and a bit more nudity, if you're not bored by that sort of thing yet.)

Ah yes, that's it. Yikes, maybe some nudity will help?

Eh... guess not. We was robbed! Scanner Brian, 1; Scanner Bryan, 0.

Eva Mendes Realizes Your Wildest Shrimping Fantasies [NSFW] [Defamer]

Eva Mendes Does Incredibly Hot Vogue Photo Shoot

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 09 May 2008 19:11:00 GMT

Thank God, these are so NSFW it's not even funny...

First off, what are these pictures supposed to be of? Some 1950s Italian movie stars? We're very confused by magazines like Vogue-- they always seem to be unsure what their own point is.

As for Eva, if she's trying to become the next Paris Hilton (or Sasha Grey), these will surely help raise her to that status-- a tart. Not that we mind that-- after all, she's in movies like We Own the Night and Ghost Racer or whatever it's called, so we don't actually respect her as an actress anyway...

Don't miss this photo, which is mind-blowingly hot and involves lingerie, heels, and being bent over a table... don't say we didn't warn you!

All of these and many more via No Watermark.

CONFIRMED: No Nerds in the Vogue Fact Checking Department

Bryan Christian — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 17:12:00 GMT

Or did some cutrate, non-DC-Comics Aquaman really make an appearance in Marvel's obscure and shortlived continuation of the Disney film The Little Mermaid? <extremesarcasm>'Cause we kind of doubt it.</extremesarcasm>

Daring Do ("Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy" at the Costume Institute / Metropolitan Museum of Art) [style.com/Vogue]

Ladies, Scanner Emily Will Judge You Harshly, Not Quietly, For Wearing These Shoes

Emily Farris — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 18:24:00 GMT

Ladies, we need to talk. I understand that you want to stand out, and be different, but you can do so without risking a broken neck—and you can certainly do so in sensible, yet sexy, shoes.

I kind of feel like if you wear these, you're letting the terrorists win. You're at least letting Anna Wintour win.

[Kingdom of Style via Yes But No But Yes]

Anna Wintour Calls Hillary Clinton "Mannish"

Emily Farris — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 19:41:00 GMT

Back story: Hillary Clinton backed out of a cover shoot and interview for Vogue. That's when the shit hit the fan.

Said Vogue editor Wintour:

"Imagine my amazement, then, when I learned that Hillary Clinton, our only female president hopeful, had decided to steer clear of our pages at this point in her campaign for fear of looking too feminine. The notion that a contemporary woman must look mannish in order to be taken seriously as a seeker of power is frankly dismaying.

"This is America, not Saudi Arabia. It's also 2008: Margaret Thatcher may have looked terrific in a blue power suit, but that was 20 years ago. I do think Americans have moved on from the power-suit mentality, which served as a bridge for a generation of women to reach boardrooms filled with men. Political campaigns that do not recognize this are making a serious misjudgment."

Leaving the "we" for a second, this entire scenario makes me really, really sad.

[via Jezebel]