Scanner : will smith

Sloppy Seconds: No Bullet-Proof Bras For You

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 07 May 2009 22:36:00 GMT

Check out this badass panda ripping some guy's jacket right off his back.

The days of pervy conservatives keeping an eye out for Splash Mountain topless photos are over. Flash away!

What do we think of this list of the Top 10 reasons men don't want sex? (We thought all ten would be "They're not attracted to you.")

Heidi Montag says she'll stay married to Spencer Brat forever. We give it six months, or one more season.

Mia Farrow is still going strong with her hunger strike, which is now at Day 11.

NYC teens are furious Bristol Palin, the "hypocrite," is in town promoting abstinence, which she had said was "unrealistic."

Screengrab picked the ten worst movies of all time-- and almost none of them were on MST3K.

"There is no such thing as a bullet-proof bra!"

Don't forget: passport rules for Mexico and Canada go into effect at the end of the month, not that anyone can afford a vacation these days.

And Will Smith wants to play a black James Bond. Great, just what we need-- pass over Idris Elba for a Hollywood action star-- that's just what the franchise needs.

Rosario Dawson Will Never Stop Having to Discuss Her Sex Scenes

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:24:00 GMT

There's apparently something called T Magazine and Rosario Dawson did an interview for it a few weeks back.

In it, she discusses lesbian sex, being completely naked on screen, abortion, and the following sex scene...

That's from Alexander, the Oliver Stone film Dawson addresses in her T Mag interview:

The only sex scene I’ve done that caused a fuss was the one I did with Colin Farrell in ‘‘Alexander.’’ That scene was intense. I thought it was necessary to the movie — in life sometimes you’re naked. But it was not soft porny in any way, which would have been harder for me. My brother, who D.J.’s in a strip club, was relieved when he saw it. He said he was happy that I ‘‘was fit.’’ He didn’t want to be embarrassed around his friends.

Sorry, Rosario, but it's an Oliver Stone film-- it was definitely soft-porny.

She also discusses lesbian sex, her mother nearly having her aborted, and love scenes with Will Smith:

I didn’t have sex until was 20. I got into trouble at school because one of my friends said, ‘‘Lesbians do it with straws.’’ I said, ‘‘I can tell you how lesbians do it, and there are no straws involved!’’ But I think all that talk of sex put me off. The first time I had it, I think it was in a head-to-toe rubber. I was terrified of getting pregnant. My mom was planning to get an abortion when she was pregnant with me. She was at the clinic waiting for her appointment and she felt me move in her stomach. I always tell her it was probably gas. I thank God for gas.
Before our first major kiss, [Will Smith] said, ‘‘Let’s go — I’m going to nail this scene. I want to go home.’’ [Laughs] But he focused. Kissing can be more intimate than nudity. You have to take your time.

We don't know about that last one-- getting attacked by a horny Colin Farrell, trying to kill him, and then having full on-screen sex is pretty intimate. It almost made us embarrassed for having been so pleased to see her naked... almost.

Gwyneth Paltrow Saves Joaquin Phoenix's Career With Her Boobs

Top 5 Threesome Sex Scenes

Apparently, Olga Kurylenko Would Rather Be Naked

While You Were Sleeping: The Fox News Child Porn Bust

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 14:08:00 GMT

If the grading system had been abandoned at our high schools, we might have gotten into some better universities.

PJ Harvey is coming to America! Who's buying us a ticket?

Who is Hollywood's most bankable star? Will Smith, followed by a host of males: Johnny Depp, Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt, and-- well-- Brad Pitt's significant other.

Male police officers were punished for taking pictures of themselves at a sizeable party-- each cop was naked and holding a firearm.

Hillary Clinton is bored, wants you to e-mail her. Send her some Scanner links, see what happens.

Have you guys been following the Duff-Dunaway feud? Us neither.

And the Fox News producer arrested for possession of child porn was actually arrested ten years ago for the same crime, and subsequently dropped out of college in Michigan because of it.

So Lap Dances Aren't Acceptable at High School Basketball Games?

Museum Erotica Might Be the Economy's Next Victim

Chris Rock is Spending Inauguration Day in the Whitest Place in America

Colleen Kane — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 15:49:00 GMT

On this historic day, Chris Rock won't be in Washington, D.C., but promoting a film at Sundance in Utah, or as he puts it, "the whitest place in America." Here's his explanation about why it's hard to make fun of Barack Obama.

ln an interview with CNN, Rock compares Barack to stars like Will Smith or Brad Pitt. "There's no Brad Pitt jokes. You know, what are you going to say? 'Ooh, you used to have sex with Jennifer Anniston. Now you have sex with Angelina Jolie. You're such a loser.' What do you say? 'Ooh, your movies are big. You make $20 million.' There's nothing to say about Brad Pitt.

Likewise, with Obama, "It's like 'Ooh, you're young and virile and you've got a beautiful wife and kids. You're the first African-American president.' You know, what do you say?"

About the excitement of today, he puts it well: "It'll be a cool day. It's weird. I've never watched an inauguration. I've never watched anyone get sworn in. You know, it's like Election Day and then you look up and somebody else is the president two months later. It was never like, "I can't wait till tomorrow. Oh my god! They're going to swear in Jimmy Carter!"

Reflections on the Obama Inauguration Celebration Concert

Obama's Anti-Racism Speech Inspires Comedians To Get All Racist

Bust Out the Blue Panties and Curl Your Hairs: We're Having Our Picture Taken with Obama on Inauguration Day

Sloppy Seconds: Ever Wonder What Kind-of Idiot Falls for Nigerian Email Scams?

Emily Farris — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 00:28:00 GMT

Matthew Fox (a.k.a. hottie hot hot Dr. Jack Shephard) says it's "a relief" that LOST is finally coming to an end. While we agree that it would be nice to know what the-f the Black Smoke Monster is and where The Island went, we know we'll be lost without LOST. [Us]

As much as we're 'meh' about Will Smith, we have to agree with him: he does have the ears to play Barack Obama. [Daily Express]

Somebody did a study about Axe body spray, but we don't have the energy to sort out the results. [AdAge]

Would you like to know exactly where to find those jackasses who donated money to pass Prop8 live? Look no further. [eightmaps]

While we feel kind-of sorry for this kid who lost $150,000 of his parents' money to a Nigerian email scam we have to ask? Rly? Srsly? WTF? [Windsor Star]

The One Thing You Never Thought You'd See Will Smith Do

Ina Maier — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 14:43:00 GMT

Look, we like Will Smith as much as the next person. In fact, we probably like him more. We've been known to announce categorically that we'll see any movie he's willing to star in. (What? They're guaranteed crowd-pleasers. Have you seen Independence Day?)

Anyway, point is: we're not one to bet against the Fresh Prince. He certainly seems to have the movie Midas Touch. But if there's one thing we'd never have thought he'd be able to do, it's solve a Rubik's Cube in 55 seconds flat.

What, don't believe us?

And we thought they were just faking it in The Pursuit of Happyness.

Also, anyone else remember the episode of Fresh Prince where Will convinces the headmaster to recommend him for Princeton by solving a Rubik's Cube, and then he totally freaks out Carlton by giving Mr. T the big willy-style "Pssshhhh!" handshake, and it's, like, totally reminiscent of that Gossip Girl ep where Serena basically gets into Yale and Blair gets, like, totally pissed off? Yeah. Turns out his talent goes way back.

(We can't find a clip, but are happy to post it if you can paste the link in the comments.)

UPDATE: Thanks to Sarah, we've got the clip for your viewing pleasure, in all it's glory, below.

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: Will Smith's Milestone

Ex-Scientologist: It's Time To Strike Back

The Top 10 Most Overrated Movies Of The Past 14 Years

Cosmo Names The Sexiest Man In the Universe...

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 16:01:00 GMT

It's a known fact that men get better with age. That goes a long way toward explaining why two dudes in their mid-forties topped Cosmopolitan's poll of The World's Sexiest Men. But only one... can be #1....

First: it should be noted before we get started that this appears to be a British survey... does that change your prediction? (Not for us, but it certainly explains the presence of Pierce Brosnan and the members of Take That.)

And the winner is...

Ladies and dudes who enjoy the male form, what do you think of their pick, as well as runner-up George Clooney (47!) and the other 23 choices...?

1 Johnny Depp, 45
2 George Clooney, 47
3 Jake Gyllenhaal, 27
4 Daniel Craig, 40
5 Brad Pitt, 44
6 James McAvoy, 29
7 JustinTimberlake, 27
8 Will Smith, 40
9 David Beckham, 33
10 Wentworth Miller, 36
11 Christian Bale, 34
12 Jonathan Rhys Meyers, 31
13 Take That: Gary Barlow, 37, Mark Owen, 36, Howard Donald, 40 and Jason Orange, 38
14 Ashton Kutcher, 30
15 Dermot O''Leary, 35
16 David Tennant, 37
17 Patrick Dempsey, 42
18 Clive Owen, 44
19 Pierce Brosnan, 55
20 Mark Ronson, 33
21 Gordon Ramsay, 41
22 Russell Brand, 33
23 Pharrell Williams, 35
24 Ryan Reynolds, 31
25 Olivier Martinez, 42

Related:

Johnny Depp and His Penis Will Not Be Shilling Trojans

Does Esquire Magazine Hate Johnny Depp Or Something?

While You Were Sleeping: The New Robin Hood Movie

Halloween Contest: Horror Movie Victims You'd Like to F*ck

Crushes of the Week: Johnny/Jude/Colin to replace Heath in Unfinished Role

Regarding Matt Damon: We See Your "Meh," Nicole, and Raise You an "Eff Yeah"

While You Were Sleeping: Will Smith's Milestone

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 13:22:00 GMT

Poor Natalie Portman. She moved from New York to LA to be with Devendra Banhart, only to see the relationship fall apart.

Check out the full clip of John McCain turning Letterman down yesterday to "rush back to Washington"... and ending up on another CBS show.

We thought about not telling you about this one...

A man who woke up from a circumcision procedure to discover his penis had been cut off is suing doctors.
Philip Seaton went to be circumcised at a hospital in Louisville, Kentucky last October, but awoke to find his penis had been amputated.
He also said he has lost the enjoyment of life, according to the lawsuit.

Some of our readers don't enjoy the comedy of Wanda Sykes. They obviously didn't see her on Leno the other night.

Philadelphia exploded a suspicious package... of hot dogs.

The serial killer who bumped off approximately 23 people, many of them gay men, in the parishes of southern Louisiana was sentenced to eight consecutive life terms.

Can you believe that Will Smith turns 40 today?

And Jenna Jameson is pregnant with twins. And no, the father is not some random co-star, okay?

Teen Sex Most Popular In Kentucky... And Other Global Sex Trends

Ex-Candidate For Kentucky Gov. Arrested For Sex Offenses After Obvious Joke

This Week In Gayness: Discriminated By McDonald's

Who Would You Rather, Scarlett Johansson or Natalie Portman?

Jenna Jameson: The Next PETA Pin-Up

Sloppy Seconds: Whose Illegitimate Half Sister is This?

Emily Farris — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 22:06:00 GMT

At first we got all excited about the Alanis Morissette karaoke contest but then we realized none of the songs were from Jagged Little Pill. [MySpace]

Did Anne Hathaway rat out her billionaire ex-boyfriend to the FBI? That is, at the same time, badass and deplorable. [The Blemish]

Angelina Jolie is apparently ready to pop those twins our of her sexy body... if she hasn't already. [FameCrawler]

It must be summer, summer, summertime! Will Smith and Jazzy Jeff have reunited, at least for the Hancock premiere. [People]

Uber-Christian Heidi Montag has just released her new single One More Drink: "I'm going home with you if I have one more drink." [Us]

Is this the missing link? Well, we mean the missing Lohan. And she's not really missing, she's just illegitimate. [ICYDK]

It's Always the Unsuspecting Girls Who Turn Out to be Crazy Christians

Angelina Jolie is Smoking Hot in Vanity Fair (In the Bathtub)

Celebrity Ink: Angelina Jolie's Tattoos Look Really Great Next to Her Breasts

Michael Lohan: The Only Person on Earth Who Won't See Lindsay Lohan's Breasts

Michael Lohan Sells Out Lindsay Once Again

Scanner Roundtable: Does Stubble = Sex(ier)?

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:35:00 GMT

A new research study has concluded that women 18 to 44 overwhelmingly prefer men with stubble to men who are clean shaven or have beards. The research also goes a long way toward explaining this strange phenomenon and the answer is, well... maybe you already figured it out.

The study was conducted by psychologists at Britain's Northumbria University and concluded that

that stubbly men may offer women the best worlds - not too strongly masculine, but mature and with the potential to grow a full beard.
The researchers carried out the study using computer technology to alter pictures of 15 men’s faces so that they displayed different degrees of hairiness. Five levels of facial hair were used - clean-shaven, light stubble, heavy stubble, light beard and full beard.
The pictures were shown to 76 women who were asked to rate them for masculinity, aggression, dominance, attractiveness, age, and social maturity. They were also asked how desirable each man would be as a short-term or long-term partner.

Meanwhile, the study determined that men with beards look approxamitely five years older than they really are, plus are considered the least attractive of the five levels of facial-hair thickness. Clearly, Scanner Emily was not invited to participate in this survey.

[E]xperts in human evolution say that that facial hair may be a signal of aggression because it boosts the apparent size of the lower jaw, emphasising the teeth as weapons.

How bizarre... and, um, interesting. Although we don't recall Mike Tyson having any stubble when he bit Evander Holyfield's ear... or even Russell Crowe as anything but clean cut when he turned that phone into a javelin. Oh well... maybe you can help us understand the whole stubble thing, for starters. Does anyone out there prefer men with stubble? Or prefer men not to have it? Why?

Via the Telegraph.

Crush of the Week: Vivienne Westwood's Bear

The MTV Movie Awards: More Entertaining Than We Wanted Them To Be

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 19:53:00 GMT

Not that we watch MTV anymore and would know, but it sounds like it proved once again to be the only thing worth keeping the network around for... below, some of the many highlights, as reported by ecstatic viewers...

1) The Mike Myers promo clips were a bit hit, especially at our sister blog, Remote Island. (We actually kind of dig the name-- then again, we were always suckers for double meanings.)

2) Big bonus brownie points to Will Smith for admitting he hasn't always made great movies. A Hollywood actor admitting their output has been consistently inconsistent is not nearly as refreshing as if they actually were consistent, but it's still fucking wonderful to hear: "I was on this stage in 1988, so to be here today in 2008... I haven't always made great movies, but I've been trying real hard."

3) Benji Madden admitted his wacky girlfriend Paris Hilton dresses him. Easy joke: That explains a shitload, dude.

4) Seth Rogen and James Franco smoked a joint live onstage... and then, unfortunately, had to give an award to a very disturbed Robert Downey, Jr. Ouch. Here's the full clip, which was not shown on TV (the cameras cut away). This clip may not be working, although you can try this link.

5) And Mike Myers and Dana Carvey trotted out their "Wayne's World" characters for the first time since 1993.

The duo of Myers and Dana Carvey brought their shtick up to date by goofing on the porno names of some of the year's top movies, including the giggle-inducing "Suck It List," "Gush Hour 3" and ... um, "Iron Man."

Via MTV News. Keep checking Remote Island for more on the MTV Movie Awards.

Scanner : will smith

Sloppy Seconds: No Bullet-Proof Bras For You

Rosario Dawson Will Never Stop Having to Discuss Her Sex Scenes

Michelle Williams Strips, Seduces, Enjoys, And Freaks Out On Ewan McGregor

Gwyneth Paltrow Saves Joaquin Phoenix's Career With Her Boobs

Top 5 Threesome Sex Scenes

Apparently, Olga Kurylenko Would Rather Be Naked

While You Were Sleeping: The Fox News Child Porn Bust

Sex, Blood, And Baby Names: Gas Prices Are Making People Crazy

So Lap Dances Aren't Acceptable at High School Basketball Games?

Museum Erotica Might Be the Economy's Next Victim

Chris Rock is Spending Inauguration Day in the Whitest Place in America

Reflections on the Obama Inauguration Celebration Concert

Sloppy Seconds: Ever Wonder What Kind-of Idiot Falls for Nigerian Email Scams?

The One Thing You Never Thought You'd See Will Smith Do

While You Were Sleeping: Will Smith's Milestone

Ex-Scientologist: It's Time To Strike Back

The Top 10 Most Overrated Movies Of The Past 14 Years

Cosmo Names The Sexiest Man In the Universe...

Johnny Depp and His Penis Will Not Be Shilling Trojans

Does Esquire Magazine Hate Johnny Depp Or Something?

While You Were Sleeping: The New Robin Hood Movie

Halloween Contest: Horror Movie Victims You'd Like to F*ck

Crushes of the Week: Johnny/Jude/Colin to replace Heath in Unfinished Role

Regarding Matt Damon: We See Your "Meh," Nicole, and Raise You an "Eff Yeah"

While You Were Sleeping: Will Smith's Milestone

Top 10 Celebrities Who Are Probably Cool In Real Life

Teen Sex Most Popular In Kentucky... And Other Global Sex Trends

Ex-Candidate For Kentucky Gov. Arrested For Sex Offenses After Obvious Joke

This Week In Gayness: Discriminated By McDonald's

Who Would You Rather, Scarlett Johansson or Natalie Portman?

Jenna Jameson: The Next PETA Pin-Up

Sloppy Seconds: Whose Illegitimate Half Sister is This?

Related:

Angelina Jolie is Smoking Hot in Vanity Fair (In the Bathtub)

Celebrity Ink: Angelina Jolie's Tattoos Look Really Great Next to Her Breasts

Michael Lohan: The Only Person on Earth Who Won't See Lindsay Lohan's Breasts

Michael Lohan Sells Out Lindsay Once Again

Scanner Roundtable: Does Stubble = Sex(ier)?

The MTV Movie Awards: More Entertaining Than We Wanted Them To Be