The Screengrab : Bruce Almighty

Morning Deal Report: Stretch Armstrong’s Big Bounce

Scott Von Doviak — Mon, 16 Feb 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Jason lives! Friday the 13th took the top box office spot with a whopping $42.2 million, meaning we can look forward to eventual remakes of Friday the 13th Part 3-D, Jason Takes Manhattan and Jason Goes to Hell. He’s Just Not That Into You slipped to second with $19.6 million, followed by Taken and Confessions of a Shopaholic. Coraline rounded out the top five, while Paul Blart: Mall Cop crossed the $100 million dollar mark, which should ensure Blart a promotion, perhaps to Homeland Security.

Whatever happened to The Hardy Men, the comical update of the Hardy Boys with Tom Cruise and Ben Stiller? Well, the stars are still attached to the project, which has a new writer, Ed Solomon (Men in Black). “The Hardy Boys adventures revolved around the mystery-solving efforts of teenagers Frank and Joe Hardy, amateur detectives who often helped their father, a private investigator,” The Hollywood Reporter reminds you. “The film adaptation would explore the reunion of the estranged, grown-up brothers, who work together to solve a new mystery.”

It’s impossible to even make jokes anymore about the onslaught of Hasbro adaptations. Last week we told you about the movie version of Candyland, and now Steve Oedekerk (Bruce Almighty) has signed on to write Stretch Armstrong, based on the pliable action figure. “The toy, a 13-inch, blond-haired muscled figure whose limbs could be stretched to nearly four feet, was launched by Kenner in the '70s. He had a dog named Fetch Armstrong, and a sibling, Evil X-Ray Wretch Armstrong,” Variety reports.

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Trailer Review: Yes Man

Paul Clark — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 16:00:00 GMT

For all you fans of broad-as-a-barn-door Jim Carrey, this is your lucky day. As with his previous smashes Liar, Liar and Bruce Almighty, The Yes Man stars Carrey as a man whose life gets turned around by high-concept intervention, this time in the form of a self-help guru who convinces him to go an entire year without saying “no.” With life-affirming laughter sure to ensue, this fits to clearly into the feel-good Carrey template that it’s hard to believe it was based on a memoir rather than being churned out by an established screenwriter with Carrey in mind. That said, it could turn out to be a cut above his other films in this vein, if the presence of director Peyton Reed is any indication- though he also directed The Break-Up, so you never know. If nothing else, this should line Carrey’s coffers for a few years, which will hopefully allow him to make something more adventurous akin to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Although truth be told, just as long as he doesn’t make another The Number 23, I’ll be satisfied.

Will Barack Obama Be America's Next Great Black President?

Andrew Osborne — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:30:00 GMT

You know how there’s usually nothing good on TV, and then finally there are TWO shows you want to watch and they’re both on at the same time? That’s what this election has been like for me. After a a lifetime of troubled Democratic administrations and doomed Democratic candidates from McGovern to Kerry (and don’t even get me started on the disastrous Gore/Lieberman campaign, Nader haters), we finally get two really strong contenders...IN THE SAME FREAKIN’ ELECTION YEAR. And they just spent the past few months beating the shit out of each other.

But that's all behind us now: according to media scuttlebutt, Hillary will officially concede the Democratic nomination on Saturday and become America’s #1 Obama Girl, while Barack moves one step closer to becoming our nation’s first real black president, after many years of fake black presidents on TV and the big screen.

And so, in honor of Senator Barack Obama’s historic achievement, Screengrab decided to look back at some of the African Americans who occupied the Oval Office in fiction before reality finally caught up:

Morgan Freeman as President Tom Beck in Deep Impact (1998)

After playing God in Bruce & Evan Almighty, President of the United States was actually a step down for Morgan Freeman...but America was lucky to have his wisdom, authority and soothing, inspirational baritone during a crisis involving a potential Extinction Level Event, a.k.a. a giant comet on a collision course with Earth. Rather than farming out the whole thing to Haliburton, President Beck freezes wages and prices to prevent an economic disaster and dispatches Robert Duvall’s Capt. Spurgeon "Fish" Tanner and a multinational crew of astronauts, who sacrifice themselves to destroy the big rock, thus saving (most of) humanity. Heckuva job, Fishie.

Dennis Haysbert as President David Palmer on 24 (2002-2004)

After surviving assassins in a truly harrowing California primary, Haysbert’s resilient, basso profundo commander-in-chief is faced with nuclear and biological terrorism, as well as attempts by corrupt American businessmen to manufacture war in the Middle East in order to drive up oil prices and...uh...hey, isn’t this a Fox show with a big conservative fan base? Must be all the torture...so much torture, in fact, that West Point Academy worried cadets were starting to view such behavior as acceptable interrogation procedure, and I’ve personally heard talk radio guys condone extreme neo-con interrogation policies because, heck, they always work for Jack Bauer. Yet isn’t it also possible, given the show’s impact, that Haysbert’s performance as the indomitable President Palmer in some way helped Middle America get used to the idea of a handsome young African American Democrat in the White House?

Bill Clinton as President Bill Clinton in Contact (1998)

While not technically African American, Bill Clinton received an honorary designation as the nation’s first black president (until the real thing comes along) from a plurality of U.S. comedians. And while not technically a cast member of Robert Zemeckis’ adaptation of Carl Sagan’s tale of Earth’s first contact with extraterrestrial life, Clinton nevertheless received more screen time than Rob Lowe or Angela Bassett thanks to a presidential speech about rocks found on Mars that was repurposed (controversially) as a fictional proclamation about alien transmissions received by astronomer Ellie Arroway (Jodie Foster). Ironically, the only reason Clinton got to portray the president in the movie was because Sidney Poitier passed on the role.

Terry Crews as President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho in Idiocracy (2006)

Of course, some presidents are better than others, though given the average IQ of the dumbed-down populace of Mike Judge’s little-seen, depressingly spot-on social satire, Idiocracy, Crews’ President Camacho doesn’t really do that bad a job. Sure, he almost executes the smartest man in the world (Luke Wilson’s cryogenically-preserved average Joe, whose 21st century common sense reads as genius in 2505 America). But he does have leadership skills, and when Joe’s brilliant plan to water crops with, y’know, water instead of corporate sports beverages helps to end a crippling food shortage, Camacho has the wisdom to actually listen to expert opinion rather than (ahem) stubbornly staying the course.

Tommy “Tiny” Lister as President Lindberg in The Fifth Element (1997)

Forget the Axis of Evil...Lister’s science-fictional administration has to deal with The Great Evil, a sentient flaming asteroid intent on, yes, wiping out all life on Earth. While Bruce Willis’ cab driver and Milla Jovovich’s supernatural supermodel do most of the heavy lifting in the fight against Evil (and its chief henchman Zorg, played by Gary Oldman in a peculiar plastic hat), President Lindberg nevertheless doesn’t ask and Chris Tucker’s Ruby Rhod doesn’t tell when his ultra-flamboyant radio host joins the mission, and the intergalactic commander-in-chief even supports his troops by preventing a naggy mother from cock-blocking Willis’ eventual clone chamber tryst with Jovovich...talk about advocating stem cell research!