The Screengrab : trailer roundup

Trailer Roundup: Leatherheads

Paul Clark — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 17:00:00 GMT

If a movie about the early days of professional football seems a strange directorial follow-up for Clooney after his Oscar-nominated Good Night and Good Luck, it shouldn't. After all, Clooney has long been most at home in period pieces and comedies that take advantage of his classic leading man appeal and interest in old-school media stories, and this definitely fits the bill. I also like the casting of The Office's John Krasinski as the young hotshot who becomes Clooney's teammate and romantic rival (should be better than License to Wed anyway). But Renée Zellweger? Really? Maybe I'm just not a fan, but she doesn't seem to quite fit into the period setting, although I suppose I should be grateful Clooney didn't cast Jennifer Jason Leigh instead. Still, I'm inclined to give the movie the benefit of the doubt. When was the last time Clooney steered me wrong?

Trailer Roundup: Bonnie & Clyde vs. Dracula

Paul Clark — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Film history is full of epic rivalries. Freddy vs. Jason. Alien vs. Predator. (Ballistic:) Ecks vs. Sever. But one rivalry is greater than any other, and only Big Atom Productions could possibly do it justice. Who else would have thought to pair the legendary outlaws Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow with the king of cinematic bloodsuckers, (Count) Dracula? And who could resist the blazing star power of Tiffany Shepis and Trent Haaga as history's most glamorous bank-robbers? A blogosphere colleague has written that Bonnie & Clyde vs. Dracula is a safe bet to be the worst movie of the upcoming year, but I'm guessing that was a typo. I'm pretty sure that "the most awesome movie of 2008" is what he meant to write.

Trailer Roundup: The Signal

John Constantine — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 17:59:00 GMT

The apocalypse is a delicious narrative confection I find hard to resist even when it’s packaged in garbage. More often than not, garbage is what you get. Just look at Paul W.S. Anderson’s Resident Evil: Apocalypse. Woof. While the new trailer for The Signal, out in February, doesn’t look especially interesting this older trailer from last summer is brimming with tasty paranoia and panic in the face of sudden and inexplicable disaster. One to look forward to.

Trailer Roundup: "Semi-Pro"

Paul Clark — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Is it just me, or are all these Will Ferrell vehicles starting to look alike? There's certainly a formula at work here- Ferrell plays a _________ who's forced to prove himself to the world, with hijinks inevitably ensuing. It's a formula that's served him well in movies like Anchorman and Talladega Nights, but it's getting more than a little stale. Heck, there's even a fight between Ferrell and a large animal, just like those earlier movies. Here, Ferrell revisits the 70s in the hope of working some of that old Ron Burgundy magic, only this time on the basketball court. And you know what that means- tiny shorts, garish colors, and headbands? You bet! To Ferrell's credit, he's still giving it his all, instead of simply biding his time until Adam McKay comes calling again. Then again, when even the likes of Blades of Glory can rake in the money, what's the motivation for him to do anything new?

Trailer Roundup: Hellboy II: The Golden Army

Paul Clark — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 17:00:00 GMT

I enjoyed the original Hellboy movie well enough, but I wasn't exactly clamoring for a second installment, even with the return of director Guillermo Del Toro. However, seeing the trailer I've got to say- Hellboy II looks pretty darn cool. Not incidentally, it also looks more like a Del Toro film than the original film, with more creepy-crawlies and dreamlike imagery. And I find it sort of amazing that Universal is actually playing up the Pan's Labyrinth connection- who would have guessed that a studio would be using a subtitled movie to sell one of their big summer blockbusters? Also, if this trailer is any indication, the boring-ass agent from the original won't be returning for the sequel, which would be an improvement. Not sure if it's actually true, but I can hope, can't I?

Trailer Roundup: Stop-Loss

Paul Clark — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 19:00:00 GMT

If I were more of cynic I would probably roll my eyes and brace myself for the inevitable op-ed pieces about how Americans don't want to see Iraq War movies that would follow the eventual failure of this film at the box office. But if I'm going to be honest, I've got pretty high hopes for this one. Maybe I'm just glad to see Kimberly Peirce making another film, as it's been a full nine years since Boys Don't Cry. Judging by the trailer, it appears she hasn't lost any of her feel for portraying flyover-country (now called "red state") life onscreen. In addition, Stop-Loss looks to be a more ground-level approach to the Iraq War, more a soldier's story than a grand statement, which is a welcome change from all the lofty rhetoric on either side of the issue. Gordon-Levitt aside, the cast isn't especially promising, but we didn't exactly think much of the girl from The Next Karate Kid either before Peirce got her hands on her, and look how well that turned out.

Trailer Roundup: 21

Paul Clark — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 20:00:00 GMT

If Hollywood is to be believed, smart people are only interesting when they're using their intelligence for selfish, greedy ends. So it is here, in a movie inspired by an actual case in which a group of college students took a Las Vegas casino by counting cards in blackjack. Of course, blackjack and math aren't particularly fun to watch by Hollywood's standards- blackjack doesn't have the built-in drama of poker, after all- so the trailer includes plenty of tricked-up filmmaking like sped-up play and funky camera angles. In addition, he's still trying to force Kate Bosworth on us, despite her being largely rejected by paying audiences (seriously, what was she doing as Lois Lane?). Still, I'll see this, since a friend of mine worked as an extra in some the MIT scenes, and I'd like to support him. It helps that this looks somewhat better than his last extra gig, last year's The Game Plan.

Trailer Roundup End of Year Special- Best Trailer of 2007

Paul Clark — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 17:00:00 GMT

There Will Be Blood

Given how exacting his direction has become, one could forgive Paul Thomas Anderson for handing responsibilities for cutting his trailers off to someone else. But ever since Magnolia Anderson has opted to assemble his own trailers, and I'm grateful that he has. Magnolia's initial teaser was a marvel of summing up the film perfectly while saying nothing, and Punch Drunk Love's trailer perfectly captured the screw-loose sense of un-pretty comedy at play in the film. Every trailer for There Will Be Blood has been a must-see, but the final version is the true classic of the bunch, emphasizing the film's macabre style and violent emotions. In addition, Anderson wisely recognizes his trump card, the great Daniel Day-Lewis, and he plays him early and often. 2007 has had its share of memorable trailers, but none will quickens the pulse like this one.

Trailer Roundup End of Year Special- Worst Trailer, 2007

Paul Clark — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 17:00:00 GMT

Alvin and the Chipmunks

There's a special place in Hell reserved for the makers of crappy kids' movies. Just because kids will watch just about anything doesn't give Hollywood license to sell them shoddy goods. It seems nearly impossible to find a big-budget non-Pixar kids' movie these days that doesn't contain self-aware pop-culture jokes and the unholy triumvirate of "family-friendly" gags- poop, flatulence, and "ow, my balls!" But while contenders for the dubious honor of 2007's worst trailer were plentiful, ranging from Cuba Gooding Jr. and the fat white guy who suffers most of the painful gags in Daddy Day Camp to the farting seals of Arctic Tale, the worst of all was almost certainly Alvin and the Chipmunks, a mix of CGI and live-action from the visionary who brought you Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties. What exactly puts this over the top? Is it the oh-so-hip musical stylings of a trio of singing rodents crooning that cutting-edge hit "Funky Town?" The sight of Jason Lee managing, by simply appearing onscreen, to outdo the indignity he suffered making Underdog? The presence of a clearly slumming David Cross? The spectacle of Alvin farting in Lee's face? Actually, I'd say it's none of these things. Instead, I'd argue that what makes this an odious phenomenon is the idea that, now that the studios have pillaged the pop culture touchstones of our youth in the name of nostalgia, they've even more cynically begun adapting material that wasn't even very good to begin with, repackaging it for a new generation of undiscerning kids. It's times like these that make me glad I don't have kids.

Trailer Roundup End of Year Special- Best Fake Trailer

Paul Clark — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 20:00:00 GMT

Don't

While it's nice to have the extended cuts of Death Proof and (to a lesser extent) Planet Terror out on DVD, for me the movies don't feel quite right without the trailers that played with them. Every Grindhouse had his favorite of the four trailers, but while Robert Rodriguez's memorably trashy Machete and Eli Roth's sick joke Thanksgiving were both worthy, for me the best of the lot was Edgar Wright's Don't. Not only is it hilarious (love the way he sets up that wonderfully awful last line) but it's probably the only one of the four I could imagine playing at a real grind house. Unlike his fellow Grindhouse trailer directors, Wright plays it almost completely straight, mimicking the atmospheric shots, frenzied editing, and borderline incoherence of 70s advertising campaigns for Eurotrash thrillers like Torso. I somehow doubt that a real-life version of Don't would have been very good, but this trailer would have guaranteed my presence at the theatre opening weekend.

Trailer Roundup End of Year Special- Best Comedy Trailer, 2007

Paul Clark — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 17:00:00 GMT

Be Kind Rewind

For a time, I was toying with the idea of simply calling this "Funniest Trailer" and giving the award to Superbad, but I've rewatched the Be Kind Rewind trailer so many times that I couldn't bear with the thought of not recognizing it here. The trailer has a distinct 80s-style wacky buddy comedy feel to it, with Jack Black and Mos Def teaming up to shoot low-budget remakes of some of their favorite movies. But I don't think the familiarity of the genre is necessarily a bad thing here, and it could provide a certain amount of grounding for the Michel Gondry flights of fancy, which was sorely lacking in last year's The Science of Sleep. But mostly, this just looks like a lot of fun. Also, ever since the trailer first emerged I've taken advantage of every chance I've gotten to quote Jack Black's priceless line, "I will shoot you, and I know robot karate." So that's something, right?

Trailer Roundup End of Year Special- Coolest Trailer, 2007

Paul Clark — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 20:00:00 GMT

From now through the end of the week, I'll be posting some of the most memorable trailers from 2007.

Iron Man

2008 looks to be a banner year for movies geared toward fans of fantasy and comic books. But while I'm excited for movies like Hellboy 2 and The Dark Knight, no trailer of 2007 had me geeking out more than the spot for next summer's Iron Man. A lot of it has to do with Robert Downey Jr.'s presence in the lead role. It pleases me to no end that he's finally cleaned up his image in Hollywood's eyes, to the point where he can headline a summer blockbuster. But if the trailer is any indication, he's still Downey through and through, which if anything is even more exciting. So yeah, this trailer won me over even before he donned the iron suit. Everything after this was a pure geek delight, with the trailer blaring Black Sabbath right on time to accompany Iron Man doing what he does best. It takes a very special- and very cool- trailer to get me as pumped to see a big-budget action movie as I used to get when I was a kid, but the Iron Man trailer does just that.

Holiday Trailer Roundup: Gremlins

Paul Clark — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 16:30:00 GMT

For many of my peers, A Christmas Story is almost certainly the greatest unironic holiday classic, but Gremlins is probably the ultimate wicked Christmas movie. For the two of you who haven't yet seen it, it's a sly fusion of the monster movie with an idealized Norman Rockwell-style vision of the small-town Christmas. In other words, it’s a perfect Joe Dante movie, one that plays to all his strengths as a satirist of comfortable Americana. Gremlins is the kind of older kids’ movie Hollywood has forgotten how to make- with fun characters and adventure for the younger crowd, and enough of an edge to make it endlessly rewatchable even for adults. Gremlins is great any time of the year, but it’s essential around the holidays, especially for the scene where Phoebe Cates recounts her tragic (and hilarious) Christmas story. What’s even more amazing is how convincingly wholesome Cates managed to be here, just two years after her immortal scene in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

Trailer Roundup: Die Hard 12: Die Hungry

Paul Clark — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 16:30:00 GMT

I love Die Hard as much as the next guy, but this is pretty hilarious. Now that Stiller has become the star of such comfort-blanket fare as Meet the Fockers and Night at the Museum, it’s hard to remember what a brilliant comic mind he used to be. Not to much a wicked impressionist- despite looking and sounding almost nothing like Bruce Willis, he manages to perfectly mimic Willis’ most famous mannerisms- the steely-eyed squint, the pained grimace, the smartass cackle. This spoof trailer originally aired on the short-lived Ben Stiller Show, and Stiller smartly enlisted the services of Taylor Negron, the baddie in the Willis-starring The Last Boy Scout, to serve Die Hungry's nefarious archvillain. Fifteen years later, in the wake of Willis’ own fourth Die Hard movie, this isn’t exactly cutting-edge anymore, but the familiarity only makes it funnier.

Holiday Trailer Roundup: Black Christmas '74

Paul Clark — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 16:30:00 GMT

Bob Clark’s 1974 classic is the granddaddy of the slasher genre, and although it helped create the template for the movies it spawned, there are also quite a few atypical elements to the film. For one thing, the cast isn’t composed of the nubile nobodies who would populate most later slasher films, but a fairly classy ensemble- the gorgeous Olivia Hussey (post-Romeo and Juliet), 2001’s Keir Dullea, Margot Kidder just a year after Sisters, and future SCTV star Andrea Martin. But make no mistake- Black Christmas is no watered-down thriller. As the trailer’s narrator (James Mason- talk about classy) says, “if this movie doesn’t make your skin crawl, it’s on too tight.” If you’ve never seen this- or worse, if you’ve only seen the 2006 remake- check it out. Black Christmas is a must-see both for fans of the slasher movie and for people looking for Scrooge-friendly holiday fare. Bless its black, two-sizes-too-small little heart.

Trailer Roundup: Speed Racer, The Great Debaters, In Bruges

Peter Smith — Mon, 10 Dec 2007 18:00:00 GMT

Speed Racer

I never really watched the old Speed Racer cartoons, so I can't say how faithful this is. But I find the cartoonishness of the trailer to be pretty charming. With something as stylized as the original, it would be a mistake to try for realism, so the Wachowskis are aiming for a more animated style in the lighting and the CGI, and this has extended to the performances. What clinched it for me was Emile Hirsch's vigorous nodding when he asks the little kid, "oh no?" toward the end of the trailer — this is about as un-naturalistic an acting decision as one can make, and it fits in perfectly. Whether this movie will please the fans is a question I can't hope to answer here. I only know that this looks like a lot of fun.

The Great Debaters

If someone told me there was a movie coming out about a group of African-American college students in the 1930s starting a debate team, I would be able to predict with relative certainty how the trailer would play, and in this case I would be more or less correct. From the time I saw Denzel Washington standing on top of a table while the words "based on a true story" appeared onscreen, I knew I was in the presence of a movie with almost nothing new to say. Frankly, outside the presence of Oscar winners Washington and Forest Whitaker, this feels more like a TV movie, down to the presence of Oprah Winfrey as producer. Also, debate isn't that interesting, folks. Sure, it allows actors to give impassioned speeches that rile up an audience one way or another, but that doesn't exactly make for great cinema. At least this year's Rocket Science, which portrayed the world of contemporary policy debate, had novelty going for it.

In Bruges

Maybe it's the Irish I inherited from my mother's side of the family, but this trailer makes me giggle uncontrollably. The cast is clearly having a great time — Colin Farrell flexing his Irish accent for a change, plus the great Brendan Gleeson, and Ralph Fiennes, who's so much more fun now that he's stopped playing so serious all the time. When I heard the plot synopsis for this, I was afraid it would come off like a Guy Ritchie gangster movie, but there's enough blarney on display in the trailer to put those thoughts to rest. I'm partial to the scene where Farrell and Fiennes negotiate their way through a shootout, but why choose? In Bruges might not break the bank at the box office, but I for one will be in line to buy a ticket.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Cloverfield, Definitely Maybe, The Other Boleyn Girl

Peter Smith — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 18:00:00 GMT

Cloverfield

While the 1.18.08 teaser that played before Transformers this past summer appeared to simply be a brilliant piece of viral marketing, it now appears that the project, now titled Cloverfield, will actually be shot largely by characters wielding personal camcorders and camera phones, instead of in a conventional style. Frankly, I'm not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, I think it's a good idea in theory to make a kind of Godzilla for the YouTube generation. But a movie like this is tricky to pull off. The Blair Witch Project worked because you always got a sense that there were really three people lost in the forest and beset by forces they couldn't explain, but it'll be much harder to get that same vibe with a project this large-scale and effects-intensive. I'm not sure the director of the 1996 David Schwimmer vehicle The Pallbearer is the man for the job. Regardless, I'm curious to find out.

Definitely, Maybe

About the best thing I can say about this trailer is that Ryan Reynolds doesn't look to be as insufferable as he usually is. Plus his three romantic partners — Elizabeth Banks, Rachel Weisz, and Isla Fisher — are all pretty smokin'. But otherwise, gag me. Much of the blame can be placed on little Abigail Breslin, who has taken over the mantle of Hollywood's go-to moppet from Dakota Fanning. Or maybe it's just that the character feels less like a precocious kid than a screenwriter's conception of same, a little girl who gives voice to all the clever, self-aware ideas on the scribe's oh-so-clever mind. How else to explain lines like "what's the male word for slut?" This is the kind of crappy Valentine's Day release that makes me glad to be single. And who signed off on that title?

The Other Boleyn Girl

Okay, who cast this thing? When your least problematic lead is Aussie Eric Bana (Henry the Eighth he ain't, he ain't), you know there's trouble. I'm not sure who's more ill-fitting in this story, emo pixie Natalie Portman as the defiant Anne Boleyn, or princess of pout Scarlett Johansson as her sister Mary. Based on her ignominious work in previous period films, I'm inclined to lean toward Johansson here, but it's a tough call. Either way, couldn't they find two English actresses who (a) suited their roles, and (b) were more convincing as sisters? With Elizabeth: The Golden Age and now this, Hollywood might want to consider laying off the British history for a while, lest our friends across the pond think we've got it in for them.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Vantage Point, Midnight Meat Train, Mama's Boy

Peter Smith — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 18:00:00 GMT

Vantage Point

This trailer has actually been floating around for a while now, but I’ve only now gotten around to writing it up because I’ve been a little unsure how I feel about it. Namely, I questioned the use of an attempted assassination as a central plot point, much as I questioned the wisdom of same in such forgettable mid-'90s fare as The Jackal and Murder at 1600. But then I realized that similar stuff goes on every week on 24, and if it’s OK for Jack Bauer to do it on television than movies are surely fair game. And make no mistake — Vantage Point looks like nothing so much as a feature-length episode of 24, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. And the cast is fairly impressive, anchored by Dennis Quaid, who has become the new Harrison Ford — the no-nonsense middle-aged man of action — now that Ford himself can barely be bothered anymore.

Midnight Meat Train

It was only a matter of time before someone would attempt to fuse a gruesome gorefest in the Hostel vein with a more conventional serial-killer storyline, without the gimmick-riddled feel of the Saw movies. And in that respect, I’m curious to see what screenwriter Clive Barker and director Ryuhei Kitamura are up to here. However, the Kitamura name gives me pause. I know that the guy’s work has a certain cult following, but in my opinion his best-known film, Versus, is a classic case of the fans responding to the flashier elements and overlooking Kitamura’s lack of directorial chops. I fear that the same may happen here, although depending on how much input Barker has in the project it could go either way.

Mama’s Boy

Question after question springs to mind: How much longer can Jon Heder coast on goodwill from Napoleon Dynamite like an ex-child star living off residuals? Has the word "no" disappeared from Diane Keaton’s vocabulary? Why is it that after every fine performance Jeff Daniels has given recently (The Squid and the Whale, The Lookout), he’s immediately turned around and appeared in garbage like this and RV? When will people start casting Anna Faris in movies that aren’t stupid comedies? How old is Eli Wallach nowadays? And how bad does a movie have to look to make me pine for comparatively sublime films like Failure to Launch and even Grandma’s Boy, which wasn’t good but at least had Jonah Hill?

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Jumper, P.S. I Love You, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Peter Smith — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 19:00:00 GMT

Jumper

Okay, looks like there’s two ways this could go — entertaining silly or dumb silly. But either way, chances are pretty good that it’ll get silly, which is fine with me since too many big-budget action movies take themselves way too seriously. But then, how do you play a movie about guys who teleport (or "jump") with a completely straight face? The one thing that has me a little uneasy about Jumper is the presence of Hayden Christensen in the lead role. Sure, he’s attractive and in good shape, but when you’re casting the role of a self-centered guy who uses his super-power for his own benefit, you should probably cast someone who possesses more edge and sexual danger than a Ken doll. Jamie Bell, on the other hand, looks to be having a lot of fun, and at the very least the trailer seems to promise the Christensen vs. Samuel L. Jackson battle that was denied to them when they were playing Mannequin Skywalker and Mace Windu.

P.S.: I Love You

Now that Hilary Swank has won two Best Actress Oscars for the two good movies she's made to date, Hollywood seems committed to turning her into a major movie star, despite the fact that she’s not especially likable or charismatic. So after the inspirational-teacher drama Freedom Writers and the supernatural horror of The Reaping earlier this year, she's ready to unleash her inner Meg Ryan with P.S. I Love You. It would be one thing if this was merely sappy-looking, but the problems I have with this movie run a whole lot deeper. Like it or not, pop culture does influence our dreams and fantasies, and the idea of a movie in which a young woman's dead husband has penned a series of letters to help the woman he loves move forward after his death strikes me as more than a little dishonest. Most widowed spouses have to deal with a mountain of unfinished business and unanswered questions following the death of their loved ones, without the benefit of magical posthumous missives to guide them every step of the way. Some move on, some don’t, but they must learn to do it on their own. Besides, what fatal disease affords its victim plenty of time and energy to formulate an intricate plan to be carried out after his death? Wouldn’t he have been busy, y'know, suffering?

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Normally, I dislike trailers for foreign-language films that avoid showing any subtitles. But in this case I’d say it was the right choice, since Diving Bell is the latest film from artist-director Julian Schnabel, whose films emphasize visual flair over memorable dialogue. There’s no mention of Schnabel until the very end of the trailer — strange considering that by all accounts he's hardly the self-effacing type — but between the unique imagery and the portrait of a tragic artist, there’s no mistaking who was behind the camera. And it’s nice to see Matthieu Amalric in a meaty, high-profile role like this. I know it’s been said before, but when a filmmaker decides to make The Roman Polanski Story, Amalric's really the only logical choice for the lead role.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Valkyrie, Atonement, Meet the Spartans

Peter Smith — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 19:00:00 GMT

Valkyrie

Despite the movie's late June release date, a high-toned thriller set in Nazi Germany would not appear to be summer movie fodder. But based on the trailer, Valkyrie looks typical of Hollywood’s approach to the Third Reich, boiling it down to the Ultimate Evil in charge and the morally-just "traitors" who have history on their side. Why else would they mount a big-budget telling of the story of the man who tried to kill Adolf Hitler, starring Tom Cruise, who, with a handful of exceptions, has made his reputation playing morally uncomplicated heroes? Perhaps director Bryan Singer and his collaborators could have taken a cue from Paul Verhoeven’s Black Book, whose breakout star Carice Van Houten is cast here as Cruise’s arm candy — in the shadow of the Nazi regime, things were rarely so simple as black and white.

Atonement

Normally, when I write my blurbs for Trailer Roundup, all I have to go on are the trailers themselves and the advance buzz for the movies. So it’s a little different to take on Atonement, which I had the chance to see at this year’s Toronto Film Festival. As far as trailers for prestige pictures go, this one’s pretty good, especially for the way it uses Dario Marianelli's score, a kind of concerto for typewriter and orchestra. But while the trailer for Atonement does a good job summarizing the plot and showing some of the film’s more visually impressive moments, I’m not sure I would have found this trailer particularly inspiring had I not already seen the movie itself. I also think it was a mistake to show Vanessa Redgrave, who doesn’t turn up until the very end of the film, for reasons that will become clear if and when you see the movie. All the same, Atonement should be catnip for awards-season voters, as its trailer makes abundantly clear.

Meet the Spartans

You know, I like many different kinds of movies, and even when I don’t like something I can usually see why others might. But occasionally a phenomenon will arise that makes me feel like Pauline Kael did when she claimed she didn’t know anybody who voted for Nixon. So it is with the recent wave of chintzy spoofs: who actually LIKES these things? Someone must enjoy these if they keep making them, right? Well, not necessarily. All it takes is for enough people to visit Blockbuster on a slow night and say, "Epic Movie might be okay," and boom, the studio greenlights Meet the Spartans. Now, I know I’m one to talk here, but don’t you think there are better ways to pass two hours than to watch a movie that will be, at best, "okay?" Read a book. Talk a leisurely walk. Try out a new sexual position or two. Or if you absolutely must rent a movie, try venturing inland from the outside walls of the local video emporium. Once you get over the old-timey movie stars and the black and white images and maybe even subtitles, you just might see something better, or at least more interesting, than the time-waster you passed over on the new release wall. Of course, it would be hard to be WORSE than Date Movie. . .

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Cassandra's Dream, Kung Fu Panda, Rambo

Peter Smith — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 21:00:00 GMT

Cassandra’s Dream

Like Match Point two years ago, Cassandra’s Dream is being sold as a standard-issue British-made thriller, with Woody Allen's name withheld until the very end of the trailer. And like Match Point, this is by all accounts a crime drama steeped in class envy (reports from Toronto were respectful but unenthusiastic). What intrigues me most about this isn’t the crime stuff but the familial issues in play, with working-class brothers Ewan McGregor and Colin Farrell (notice the accents) coming to rich uncle Tom Wilkinson to borrow money. At this point, the movie could go either way, but I’d rather see Allen make movies like this than the mostly lame comedies he’s been churning out since Small Time Crooks.

Kung Fu Panda

Not that Dreamworks Animation has ever been especially committed to craft, but now that they’re banging out two movies a year all quality control has more or less been shot to hell. I imagine this pitch sounding like a pot-addled college student’s late-night ramblings: "Dude! You know how there are different kinds of kung fu named after, like, animals? Wouldn’t it be awesome if you could, y’know, see all the different animals doing the different kinds of kung fu! And there would be a panda, and he’s all fat and funny and he can’t do kung fu at all; now that would be a great movie. They could get Jack Black to be the panda. . . that would be sweet, right?" In fact, the more I think about it, the more I’m inclined to think that this isn’t even for real. It’s not, is it? Also, where’s Hamster Style?

Rambo

Years from now, there’s going to be a certain amount of confusion as to which Rambo is which. To wit — First Blood is the first Rambo movie, the second installment is Rambo: First Blood Part II, nobody will bother with Rambo III, and the upcoming fourth movie is simply called Rambo. Complicated enough for you? Anyway, when I first heard that Stallone was making another Rambo movie, my initial reaction was one of eye-rolling disbelief. But that changed when I saw last December’s Rocky Balboa, a movie that was cornball and far-fetched, but as endearing as Rocky’s old dog Butkus. So yes, the image of a sixty year old Stallone taking on guerrillas in the jungles of Myanmar is a little hard to take seriously, but I’m rooting for Rambo to be good, or at least fun. Yeah, I’ll take fun.

— Paul Clark

Vintage Trailer Roundup: Halloween Hangover Edition

Peter Smith — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 19:00:00 GMT

Werewolves on Wheels

Here’s one of my favorite B-movie trailers, advertising "the most thrilling horror motorcycle movie ever made" — and as it turns out, the first. It seems that by 1971, just two years after Easy Rider, the motorcycle-movie well was running dry, so producers started jumping on gimmicks to liven up the genre. . . and bless ‘em for it. To be honest, I’ve never actually seen Werewolves on Wheels in its entirety, although by all accounts I’m not missing much. Then again, there’s no way anything could possibly live up to this trailer.

Torso

Here’s another classic, all the more so for how it tries to make itself look respectable by advertising itself as a production of Carlo Ponti, "the producer of Doctor Zhivago." After all, a bloated David Lean epic dovetails so neatly with classic giallo fare. Torso is an Eli Roth favorite, and it’s easy to see the film’s influence on movies like Hostel. But the teaser itself had to be an influence on Edgar Wright, who paid homage to the use of the endlessly repeated title in his Grindhouse trailer Don't.

The Shining

The greatest horror-movie teaser ever? Yes, it just may be. This goes to show that you don’t need to sell the story, or even show the actors’ faces, to effectively sell the movie. I love that Kubrick makes us wait for the blood — and that he was somehow able to convince the MPAA that it was actually rusty-colored water that came pouring out of the elevator shaft. Even if you don’t like the movie itself, the teaser is pretty stunning.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: The Eye, One Missed Call, The Orphanage

Peter Smith — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 16:00:00 GMT

The Eye

One Missed Call

The original Pang Brothers’ version of The Eye was a cheesy mix of the forgettable Madeleine Stowe thriller Blink and the early, funny films of M. Night Shyamalan. But the film nonetheless got solid reviews, so it was only a matter of time before a studio decided to mount an English-language remake. It’s hard to imagine someone out-hacking the Pangs, but David Moreau and Xavier Palud, making their English-language debut following the middling French home-invasion chiller Ils, look to be giving it the old college try. And as shoddy as most of the Asian horror remakes have been thusfar, at least some have been cast with interesting actors. That this one stars Jessica Alba doesn’t inspire confidence. But why should Lionsgate do any different? The formula of hot chick + semi-proven commodity + February release worked for When a Stranger Calls, right?

No less dire-looking is the remake of One Missed Call. The original film was one of roughly forty-seven movies Takashi Miike made in 2003, and was a decent movie that fit comfortably in an era of J-horror gimmickry. By comparison, the Hollywood version looks like another long-overdue nail in the coffin of J-horror remakes, bearing a closer resemblance to the spate of Ring knockoffs than the original version and starring the hottest cast of fall 2001 (Shannyn Sossamon, Ed Burns, etc.) You’d think audiences would start objecting to lousy horror movies, but then, we’re already on the fourth Saw.

The Orphanage

I saw this movie in Toronto, and I recommend it. But genre movies are a tough sell, so instead of accurately portraying The Orphanage as an atmospheric thriller in the vein of Guillermo Del Toro (who produced the film and gets his name prominently featured in the trailer), this trailer makes it look like a schlocky Asian-horror wannabe, complete with lots of flash cuts and horrified reaction shots and absolutely no dialogue. It’s a shame, since the audience that embraced Pan’s Labyrinth might avoid this on the basis of the lousy trailer, while the rest will probably be pissed at having to read subtitles. Still, it’s nice to see a horror movie with a heroine over forty who isn’t a spiteful old biddy.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Charlie Wilson's War, Love in the Time of Cholera

Peter Smith — Mon, 22 Oct 2007 17:00:00 GMT

CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR

For a movie about a couple of well-placed rogue elements helping to kick the Soviets out of Afghanistan, Mike Nichols' latest looks about as glossy and middle-of-the-road as a movie of this sort can be. But homogenization aside, is it just me, or does something about Charlie Wilson’s War seem a bit familiar? Let’s see: two of Hollywood’s biggest stars top-line a comedy in which they find themselves in the middle of a war being fought in a Muslim-dominated country. Wait a sec. . . could this turn out to be Nichols’ Ishtar? Come to think of it, that would be kind of awesome, considering that (a) Nichols’ former comedy partner Elaine May hasn’t directed a single film since that 1987 flop, while Nichols’ career thrives despite turds like Regarding Henry and What Planet Are You From?, and (b) the studio is intent on selling the movie as prime Oscar material. If my suspicion pans out, no amount of hot-fudge love or cherry-ripple kisses could help endear this to the Academy.

LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLERA

You know, it’s bad enough when Hollywood makes mincemeat of good books by popular authors. But to see the work of a Nobel-prize-winning author like Gabriel Garcia Marquez sold like a Hispanic Nicholas Sparks adaptation. . . no, it’s just too much. I despair that this will be the first taste of Garcia Marquez for the majority of moviegoing audiences, and that in all probability the movie won’t give them any reason to discover his books. I’m also not a big fan of the credit "original songs by Shakira," but that’s a relatively minor quibble. The big problem here is this: just because it’s a novel doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to adapt it. My only hope is that the inevitable surge in popularity for Doris Lessing following her recent Nobel won’t suddenly prompt Hollywood to green-light a film version of The Golden Notebook starring Scarlett Johansson.

— Paul Clark

Trailer Roundup: Sweeney Todd, There Will Be Blood, August Rush

Peter Smith — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 16:00:00 GMT

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

When it was announced that Hollywood was finally going to adapt Steven Sondheim’s hit musical, it seemed a no-brainer for Tim Burton to be tapped to direct. Yet judging by the trailer, I’m not sure he was the right choice. Sure, Burton has become the go-to guy for dark-yet-commercial, but Sweeney Todd is unpleasant stuff, and Burton’s tendency towards cartoonish style and scary-yet-sensitive man-children may lead him to soft-pedal the story’s less savory aspects. Too bad, because Sweeney Todd could be a hell of a movie if made right. Jury’s still out on the singing voices of the actors — Sweeney’s a demanding role vocally, and Depp mostly speak-sings his one song in the trailer. But let’s not forget that (a) a really strong voice isn’t altogether necessary when you’ve got multiple takes and post-production facilities at your disposal, and (b) for whatever reason Hollywood studios are still reluctant to give musicals an all-out singing-and-dancing push. Perhaps they’ve realized that the core audience for musicals is both older and more female than the demographic of teenage boys they court so aggressively?

There Will Be Blood

Oh man, I’m so pumped (sorry) for this. Every P.T. Anderson film is an event for a certain strain of filmgoer, but this could be even more than that. Blood appears to be as much of a departure as Punch-Drunk Love was. Unlike many filmmakers of his generation, he’s impossible to pigeonhole. And that he’s got Daniel Day-Lewis on board this time only makes this even more promising. Here’s a director who got startling performances from Burt Reynolds and Adam Sandler, neither a particularly acclaimed thespian, and so a collaboration with the most uncompromising talent among recognizable "name" actors is pretty irresistible. Based on ecstatic early word coming out of Austin’s Fantastic Film Fest, my high hopes seem to be justified. Also, just to clear something up: There Will Be Blood is the new Paul Thomas Anderson movie. It is not the new Saw movie. Get it? Got it. Good.

August Rush

Let’s see: cute kids, music, an orphan trying to find his parents. If this weren’t in English it’d be a shoo-in for the Best Foreign Language Film Oscar. But as it is it’s a big-studio release, so it’s got to stand on its own merits. I’ve got nothing against anything this movie is about, but August Rush looks like it’s been calculated for maximum tear-extracting shamelessness. And just when you don’t think it could look any more dire, Robin Williams shows up in full twinkling-eccentric mode as a inspirational street-corner guitarist in a cowboy hat. At least Terrence Howard is around to deliver the trailer’s one good moment, when he asks the long-lost mom played by Keri Russell the question on everyone’s mind — "Why’s it so important that you want him now?"

— Paul Clark