Lots of stuff happened last night on True Blood, and by a lot, we actually mean not so much. A plot summary would go like this:
"Jason got a superboner from v-juice. Sookie went to a v-bar."
And on the whole, we were v. underwhelmed.
First: the boner. Lots of made of the boner being big and painful and maybe emitting weird goops and possibly getting Jason in more dutch with the law than he already is. And then, not only did none of that happen, but also, we didn't see the boner. Which, sorry Alan Ball, you're lying to yourself if you think there's a way to stay classy and have your plot revolve around a terrifying hard-on. We deserved to see the thing!
And as for Sookie's trip to Fangtasia (yeah), well, Gabe over at Videogum has had much to say on this point worth reading -- and roughly mirroring our own views, as faithful readers will note -- except that he doesn't come out and say what we did last week -- that Alan Ball is *only* interested in vampires inasmuch as they are a metaphor for anything else -- and now that this has been established sans doute, we'll see that and raise it: that Alan Ball's apparent dilettantism with all things vampiric is officially hurting this show. A goth-disco version of "Don't Fear The Reaper" isn't vampiric in the slightest, Mr. Ball; it's mostly just gay, and we don't care how much bloody sperm you throw at us, dude: if you can screw up the sexiest man in Sweden as a vampire -- seriously people, what a douche -- you are not earning your paycheck.
PREVIOUSLY:
True Blood": Is There Anybody Who Ain't Fucking Vampires These Days?
Married... With Television: "True Blood" Edition
