The Remote Island

Jodie Sweetin, "Celebrity Rehab"

Posted by Jake Kalish

 

Ah, poor Jodie Sweetin, formerly of Full House. First the trouble with meth, and the drinking. Now the end of her marriage, and not being allowed to see her baby. Sweetin claims to now be "100% sober," but we know it's a process. That should take place on television. We've been following Jodie Sweetin creepily on her road to recovery, and now we've got two words for her: Celebrity Rehab. We already made this suggestion to Tara Reid,for Tara Reid-ing all over the place, but she hasn't listened. You should, Jodie. You've got a kid, some bad habits, and a flagging career. Go to Celebrity Rehab, and make America proud. You'll get the help you need, and get reacquainted with the American viewing public. That's killing two birds with one methamphetamine-addicted stone.

PREVIOUSLY:

Jodie Sweetin Of "Full House", Off The Wagon And Not Allowed To Be Alone With Her Baby

Jodie Sweetin Of "Full House" Wants To Talk About Her Upcoming Book, Not Her Upcoming Court Case

"Full House's" Jodie Sweetin Says She's Sober, Again 

Please, Tara Reid, "Celebrity Rehab"!!!


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About Jake Kalish

Jake Kalish is the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights http://www.amazon.com/Santa-vs-Satan-Compendium-Imaginary/dp/0307406709/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208807460&sr=8-1

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    Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

    Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

    Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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    Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

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