You know how sometimes you type a word, and the longer you stare at it
the less it looks like a real word? We find that the same is true of
Bob Costas -- the longer we stare at him the less he looks like a real
person. We're just saying.
Did we mention that NBC did FIVE HOURS of pregame
coverage for the Super Bowl? If you couldn't catch it all, not to worry --
we have the top ten highlights with host Bob Costas...
10. Top of the broadcast, Bob's opener: "Live from Raymond James Stadium, in Tampa,
home of the Bucs. We are aboard its signature pirate ship, which will be our
vessel for this 43rd Super Bowl. AHOY MATIES!"
9. Checking in with the "Super Suite," Bob refers to Al Roker as
a "Celebrity Magnet." In response, Al asks Bob where he left his eye patch and
parrot.
8. Keeping with the nautical theme, Bob refers to Keith Olbermann as "First Mate Keith." Keith
follows up by using the word "peripatetic" to describe the Arizona Cardinals
franchise.
7. Top Chef judge Tom Colicchio hits us with a fun food fact: More food is eaten in the U.S. on Super Bowl Sunday than on any other day in the year (with the exception of Thanksgiving). Tom introduces the cook-off that will take place
later in the broadcast, and Bob chimes in with, "We'll keep with you all afternoon to see if
anyone explodes from over-consumption."
6. Hayden Panettiere appears
on the pre-game show promoting Heroes and sporting Uggs. She's embarrassed to
admit that she's never attended a pro football game. Bob responds by addressing the camera, "Apparently
she's never been to a football game, AND (pointing to Hayden's footwear) never been to Tampa."
5. Bob sums up Brett Favre's last four off-seasons in which
he threatened to retire, came back, retired, came back and now threatens to
retire again as his "Hamlet Act."
4. After NBC reporter, Andrea Kramer reports that the Steelers buses are about to begin
their 14 mile journey from the hotel to the stadium, Bob asks, "Andrea, did YOU merit a
police escort?" To which her response is
inexplicably secretive: "I can't tell you, Bob."
3. For reasons we can't explain, Bob does a pre-game interview with Conan O'Brien who seems to be providing us with some sort of rundown on NFL kicking techniques (how does Conan O'Brien know these things)?
2. Sarah Palin appears on a previously recorded message, well-wishing the troops watching the Super Bowl overseas. Bob looks into the camera and quips, "Is Governor Palin ready for the Super Bowl?...(wink)...you betchya."
1. Bob sits down with Bruce Springsteen to discuss his upcoming performance in the halftime show, and stumbles through an awkwardly worded question about whether or not Springsteen's sixtieth birthday and the recent deaths of two close friends have caused him to write more songs about the passage of time. Bob wraps up the question with: "Maybe you can't jump up on the piano like you used to, but..." The Boss rears up out of his chair and yells, "WANNA BET?!" before challenging Bob to a 40 yard dash.
Many thanks to our friend Ben for helping us with this list, and also for making us feel less inadequate about our football knowledge.
