The Remote Island

Let's Talk About Sex With Ralph Macchio

Posted by Lindy Parker

 

Okay, so when Ralph Macchio first turned up on Ugly Betty, we were like "OMG. Karate Kid! Good to see you!"  However, rumor has it we might be seeing more of him than we ever expected...

In case you haven't been keeping up, Ralph guest-starred as councilman Archie Rodriguez earlier in the season in some very flirty, very high-chemistry scenes with Ana Ortiz's character, Betty's big sis Hilda Suarez, that left viewers (including us!) dying to have the pair hook up.

"Well, you know the title of the second episode is 'The Sex Issue.' It's surprising for both of them where it goes." Umm...to the bedroom?!? "It might. It might go into the salon; it could go anywhere," he says. "Things get revealed about the councilman's past, too. There's another side to him that conjures up excitement and passion in her."  (E! Online)

Honestly, we're significantly less interested in his vague teases, than we are in this revelation: the original karate kid is 48 years old.

Let us say that again. He's 48. For some reason, we're having a hard time getting our head around this as an actual truth.  We suppose it's because in our minds, we'd previously grouped him as a peer of Leonardo DiCaprio, Christian Bale and us. But, in fact, he could have fathered all three of us.

Other people Ralph Macchio could have fathered:

Drew Barrymore
Neil Patrick Harris
James Van der Beek

People Ralph Macchio just barely escaped fathering:

Jon Hamm
Ben Affleck
Taye Diggs

Peers of Ralph Macchio:

Bob Saget
Jon Stewart
Keith Olberman
Our Dad
Kiefer Sutherland


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT
Posted Mar 05 2009, 05:15 PM
Filed under: ,

Comments

No Comments

About Lindy Parker

Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She now writes for nerve.com's TV blog, "The Remote Island." She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

in

Archives

  • May 2009 (163)
  • April 2009 (356)
  • March 2009 (396)
  • February 2009 (452)
  • January 2009 (404)
  • December 2008 (282)
  • November 2008 (243)
  • October 2008 (276)
  • September 2008 (252)
  • August 2008 (225)
  • July 2008 (226)
  • June 2008 (240)
  • May 2008 (25)

    • about the blogger

    Bloggers


    Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

    Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

    Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

    Contributors


    Ben Kallen is an entertainment, health and humor writer who's been lectured to by Sidney Poitier, argued with by Lea Thompson and smiled at by Jennifer Connelly. He's the coauthor of The No S Diet and author of The Year in Weird, along with hundreds of magazine articles. He lives near the beach in Los Angeles, just like the gang from Three's Company.

    Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

    Send tips to remoteisland@nerve.com