The Remote Island

Which Show Is Being Turned Into A Video Game? And Promoting That Game By Talking About Prison Rape?

Posted by Jake Kalish

 

This show, ostensibly about justice and doing the right thing, is being turned into a third-person shooter game? And using prison rape to promote that game? What what what Whaaaaaaat?

Yes, here comes Judge Mathis, the video game. But hey, you say - aren't judges an important societal counterbalance to shooting people indiscriminantly?Shhhhh. Besides, as the judge explains, the goal in this game is to do the exact opposite of everything that makes video games fun:

As the judge tells it, the player inhabits the role of La-Ron Washington, a two-time con who gets out of the pen early thanks to overcrowding. La-Ron "must stay out of trouble, perform community services and avoid negative street influences and temptations. One more strike and La-Ron gets a life sentence from Judge Mathis."

Ah, but there's a spanner in the works: "The entire Detroit underworld wants him dead for the alleged murder of a crime boss – a murder he didn't commit."

Sweet! We will totally not do that stupid community service and instead attempt to gun down the entire Detroit underworld! Not so fast, says Judge Mathis:

"When you go to prison, you gain credibility when you come back on the streets. On the other hand, when you go to prison you can also be raped," Mathis tells Yahoo! Games. "So take your chances. We may see young people who make the wrong choice and go to prison and are assaulted repeatedly (in this game)."

Gaaaah! Judge, did you just threaten young Americans with virtual prison rape? Verdict: Guilty as charged.

PREVIOUSLY:

Is A "Mad Men" Video Game Coming?

New "Dexter" Game For The iPhone Should Be Killer

Video Games Are The "Fifth Network"

 

 

 



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About Jake Kalish

Jake Kalish is the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights http://www.amazon.com/Santa-vs-Satan-Compendium-Imaginary/dp/0307406709/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208807460&sr=8-1

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    Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

    Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

    Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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